Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Wahh Wahh All Night Long!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 ChillinChill
Joined: 10/2/2010
Msg: 19
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!Page 3 of 2    (1, 2)
As a early childhood educator, with 20 years under my belt and working with children from toddlers to age 5. I have never heard of a child that cried constantly for hours and hours at a time. Never.
In my classroom, I found that a three year old can be comforted and re-directed within a matter of minutes.

If this situation is as Ink explains I think her intuition is right. There is something very wrong.
So if Social Services finds nothing, they found nothing and at least Ink will not have stood silently listening while this child is continuously neglected.

If it were a couple fighting and a woman was crying or screaming no one here would say DO NOT CALL THE COPS... so why is it such a preposterous suggestion to call 911 or call the proper authorities? Please people ABUSE exists, get your heads out of the sand.

If you had a child that cried constantly... shame on YOU, you are not parenting. Children are rarely screaming on a constant unless there is something evidently wrong. Sometimes VERY wrong. I have had to much experience to believe otherwize.
5 kids of my own and hundreds and hundreds of others I have cared for. This is NOT NORMAL.

Ink, make a simple phone call and tell the RIGHT people what you are witnessing or hearing....and do it before it's to late.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 20
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/11/2010 4:33:15 PM
And FYI I would rather believe Mistress Chill, someone with firsthand EXPERIENCE in this matter than these little idiotic comments about jumping the gun and ignoring it and buying ear plugs and this being none of my business. I am hearing it, its disturbing my peace and quiet so it IS my business.

Very wise decision, OP! (And it is your business for a number of reasons, not to mention? It's just right to be concerned about the child after such a length of time and no apparent reprieve and/or change in what you hear.)

Edited for content!
 CheLuna
Joined: 7/7/2010
Msg: 21
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/11/2010 6:38:29 PM
For all we know this baby is crying hoping someone will come to her aid. Imagine if you cried out for help and no one wanted to get involved. How would you feel?
 KiwiBassist
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 22
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/11/2010 10:00:43 PM
In most places if one knows or suspects something is not right and they do not report it to the child protective services, and something happens to the child, they can be charged, at least here in Canada.

I guess thank goodness nothing ever happened to some of you as children and you didn't have ignorant people like you guys who didn't make a call just to make sure everything was fine.

As for me I am glad that stranger called on my siblings and I and saved us from the things our father did to us and the step monster as we often called her. If it weren't for that stranger hearing some kids screaming and crying a lot, we may not even be alive today. I am glad there are some people in the world with a heart. If everyone minds their own business and keeps quiet how many children would die at the hands of their parents or other family members?

As for the crying a thought, one can tell by the intensity and sound of the crying generally. If its high pitched screaming like in pain something is definitely wrong. No child should be left to cry and cry and cry for hours. Did you not know letting them cry eventually leads to them being quiet and developing mental disorders because mum and dad were too lazy to attend to whatever the child needed at that time? It is a proven fact, that these children left alone and ignored neglected when they are crying, when they eventually just stop it is generally because they know no one is coming anyway.
 slybandit
Joined: 7/10/2006
Msg: 23
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 9:21:57 AM
Well, use a bit of logic here, SilentInk. If you state that you cannot hear the parents comforting the child, you can probably hear what's going on in that apartment well enough to know that they are not beating this kid.

Neglecting the kid is possible. The kid may also just have some medical problem where s/he just suffers a lot of pain, or is sick often, and there is not much anyone can do about it.

What would it hurt to phone child services and have them show up? If the kid is not being neglected, it's no harm, no foul. If the kid is being neglected, then you have done something that might just save that kid from suffering.

This reminds me of the time I phoned the cops on a neighbour who was quite obviously beating on his wife/girlfriend/roommate/significant other. The cops tried to convince me, oh, you're just hearing the T.V., but I wouldn't shut up and I made them knock on the doors, because you can tell the difference between someone getting smacked around and CSI Miami with the volume on 30. Sure enough, one look at her, and if it was the T.V., it was because he was bouncing her face off of it, so he got awarded a free ride, a fashionable new set of metal bracelets and the perp walk in front of the neighbours.
 Annie was here
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 24
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 12:03:35 PM
I have no previous experience with children so I can't really say if it's normal or not for a child to cry for so long.All my experience is second hand.I am 6 months pregnant though so soon I will have first hand experience.At 41,almost 42 freaking years old I am having a baby!



Edit:

I recently read about a baby named Jessica who the neighbors heard crying all the time yet did nothing.Eventually the baby was raped first and then killed by her father and mothers boyfriend stomping on her and throwing her against the ceiling.She was only 8 months old and her entire life all she suffered was abuse.Her poor little body was full of bruises but old and new when the medical examiners examined her.
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 25
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 12:28:41 PM
^^^^ Just think Annie with the average kid these days not leaving the nest till the 25 to 30 yr old age bracket you will be almost 70 by the time your child leaves the nest. Good Luck Annie your situation would certainly not be for me but this seems to be increasingly common these days. It is getting difficult to tell the grandparents from the parents these days or with the amount of boy toys and girls out there the children from the SO's.

I too have no direct experience with kids but have talked to friends and ex GF's who are parents who had kids that cried for what seemed to them to be most of the time while they were infants. It always seems worse when you are listening to someone elses annoying noises rather than those of your own so I have to question how many hours a day the child is actually crying. So it may be cause for concern for possible child neglect or it may just be in the childs nature to want to exercise those vocal cords - the child could be the next Darby Mills for all we know and could be practicing to sing Turn it Looooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuddddddddddddd!
 Annie was here
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 26
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 1:05:25 PM
Paddy o Lantern.....

Why do people care what age they will be when their adult child is this age or that age? You do realize that none of us will live forever right? You can become sick and infirmed or die at any age and leave your children without a parent.Eventually we all will die and will not be in our adult children's lives anymore.All we can do is plan for anything and live as healthy a life as we can now.Anyway I am far more healthy and active then most of the twenty something mothers I know.Most of them don't want to get off the couch and their kids are being "raised" by babysitters and the tv.Most of them would rather set themselves on fire then go for a run with me,biking trips,swimming or camping for the weekend.


As for the op and her "situation" calling children's services just to be on the safe side would not hurt.How many children would still be alive today,or at least of not suffered "severe emotional trauma" if neighbors,friends and family had not made someone else's life "their business".
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 27
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 1:30:14 PM

Why do people care what age they will be when their adult child is this age or that age?


Well I for one have much less energy and have much less tolerance for going without sleep and to work the extra long hours to bring in the extra dough that would be required to raise a family in my situation. When I was in my 20's I could work 12 to 16 hrs and day 7 days a week and could survive on a few hrs of sleep a night and could eat poorly and still had the energy to pursue other activities a couple of days in a row of that now and I would be a mess.

As we age most of us have to take a little better care of ourselves to feel we can function well. Most of us become impatient and cranky when we are tired and worn out and that IMO makes us less likely to be in a nurturing mood. Having less energy as we age can of course be balanced out by having the resources to hire someone to help with the housework and child rearing or having the luxury that few can afford these days of having a dedicated stay at home parent.

Annie I am not questioning your particular abiltiy to be a successful parent I am just giving you my opinion as to why this is not for me.
 Annie was here
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 28
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 1:39:42 PM
***Gives paddy a and a cup of coffee***


We must put the needs and safety of all children above our desire to not want to interfere in other peoples business.If you are wrong op then no harm done,but if you are right and some type of abuse is going on then you will of saved a child from further abuse.
 BLUEMISS
Joined: 7/15/2007
Msg: 29
view profile
History
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 8:33:04 PM
When I was pregnant with my last child, there was a japanese girl in the news in Calgary, that wanted to party. She strapped her little boy in a car seat, left him in the apartment and did her thing.She also had a daughter,never did find out what she did with her.The neighbours heard the little boy cry, but did nothing about it. When he stopped crying, he was dead.
If I lived next door I would have to go investigate and if I wasn't satisfied with the parents answer, I would report them.Some people should never have kids.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 30
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/12/2010 11:01:18 PM
I would try to atleast meet the neighbors before you call social services.
Do they look down and out?
Maybe they need help.
Never asume from a distance.
sight unseen.

They may have an ill kid and know it cries alot.
Sometimes it can be a twisted colon or something
causing the baby pain inside.
Have they taken the kid to a doctor?
Can they afford to?
Maybe thay have and the doc told them
to wait a week. We can only speculate.

Secondly, time the crying.
A baby crying seems longer than it is.
If longer than 45 minutes I would wonder.
and decide to meet the parents.
Just to see first if they are competent.
and if they are doing something.
 lilcontrary
Joined: 3/16/2010
Msg: 31
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/13/2010 11:09:54 AM
Silent Ink, I too am a mandated reporter. Please do this as a previous poster said, you may be liable for this child if you do not report the crying and something happens. My advice was going to be the same as Stray Cat's. Document the crying for a week and make notes of when you are out of the apartment. Tape record the crying if you can. This will be valuable information for the protective services in their investigation. Document if you can hear any kind of interaction between the child and parents. If there are issues such as health causing this child discomfort then it is likely protective services will assist in getting care for him/her.

To the poster who feels that you have to hear a child being beaten.. it simply is not so. The abuser does not have to scream to hold a cigarette to a hand, squeeze a hand/foot hard enough to cause pain. Enough conditioning and even a 2 yr old child will go into a closet to sit in the dark for hours with just the point of a finger.

Good luck OP

Mary

P.S and off topic to Annie, my mom was 42 when she gave birth to me. Everyone thought she was my grandmother but that was her own doing by always wearing old lady hairdo's. lol However, she was always the first to be out playing kick ball or baseball with us kids. Good luck with your new life!
 KiwiBassist
Joined: 5/24/2010
Msg: 32
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/13/2010 2:19:05 PM
Stray cat, appearances can be deceiving. Had CPS ever shown up at my step monsters home while our father was not there, which is when beatings happened, they would have seen well dressed kids, nice home, neat tidy etc. Some of the biggest markers of abuse are emotional something you cannot see, neglect can often not been immediately seen.

Just because some people can keep up appearances as a normal life to outsiders doesn't mean everything is actually all right. Nor are abusive/neglecting parents going to tell you they do that, they tend to hide it at all expenses until they get caught. For us it was a neighbor who heard the screaming of 2 kids, and called the police, thank god that I was old enough to tell them what happened and showed them the beating marks of which there are scars still today from that lady. She made sure they were hidden from normal view. Had you come and knocked on our door, you would have been met with an overly polite lady who would assure you all was ok and that we had just gotten in trouble and didn't like having to sit on a chair in the corner.

So as I said appearances are deceiving. Many sociopaths/psycotics can keep up an appearance when the time is needed.

OP hope you called the CPS.
 SilentInk
Joined: 3/20/2010
Msg: 33
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/13/2010 7:35:07 PM

OP hope you called the CPS.


I actually called yesterday and it’s out of my hands now. They said that the situation will be investigated.

Thanks for the advice to the folk who actually put some thought behind their reasoning and weren't just trying to be a smart azz. But then again, POF wouldn't be POF without the azz hats.

Cheers!
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 34
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/13/2010 8:43:16 PM

POF wouldn't be POF without the azz hats.


Hey! Some of us resemble that remark!

Well OP let us know how it turns out because enquiring azz hats want to know.

I'm curious whether its child neglect/abuse or there was some other reason for all the crying.
 lilcontrary
Joined: 3/16/2010
Msg: 35
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/14/2010 7:58:10 AM
Thanks for calling... I really mean that.

btw I am one of the enquiring azzhats too! Please keep us posted!


Mary
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 36
view profile
History
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/14/2010 3:49:50 PM
When it comes to the disruptions caused by sounds, I find it's usually the fact that the sounds starts and stops that is the problem. Have you tried blocking THEIR sounds with your own? Putting on your own "concert" might both provide you with steady-state sound to let you sleep through their interruptions, as well as giving you a small sense of "revenge." I don't advocate the revenge part, I just point out that you can THINK of it that way, if it helps.
White noise is supposed to be the best way to block other sounds, but pretty much anything that is steady in tone qualities and volume will do. It's one of the reason that many people find they can sleep in the midst of the tremendous STEADY noise of a city, but are startled awake out in the wilds, by the occasional chirp of a cricket.
 forumfishie
Joined: 9/17/2009
Msg: 37
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/14/2010 7:18:57 PM
That baby is making their parents proud
He is a screamer just like his/her Mom

You have lasted almost three years having your sleep disrupted?
That's a long time
You need your beauty sleep

I friend of mine had the same problem
with a baby crying and she just moved
because earplugs don't work
she even tried ear plugs and ear muffs, the kind they use at the
shooting ranges, and you could still hear the wahhh through the wall
we went to talk to the neighbor she said the baby was prone to ear
infections hence the crying

If I were you
I would just move
because you know what comes next, right?

Another six months of
"Oh Yeah F%$k me harder"
then, yet another Wahhh, wahhh!
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 38
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/15/2010 5:59:13 AM
In three and half years you have never even seen your neighbors????
I'd be worrying about that.

Although I guess that happens a lot in real big buildings if one isn't inclined to be observant of neighbors.
It's all very odd in my world, though. I tend to learn who it is that is living right around me.. even if I just know them by sight and a nod.

I don't know what to tell you.
If you truly wonder what is going on.. go meet them.

Oh, wait a minute.. how do you even know it is still a "them".. if you've never seen them?
Maybe no sounds of love-making anymore because it's now just one and a baby?

Do you have any neighbors you talk to?
Ask them if they've heard the baby.
Ask them if they know the situation .. who lives there.. whatever.

I think most people have SOME idea of who lives around them.. so maybe they'll have some answers for you.

Then you can make a better informed 'next step'.


edit: I just read above me and I see you've already called social services.
I just wonder why you didn't first ask around with the neighbors you do see/say hi to?
 SilentInk
Joined: 3/20/2010
Msg: 39
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/15/2010 6:44:38 AM

In three and half years you have never even seen your neighbors????
I'd be worrying about that.


No I have never seen my neighbors. The only neighbors I have seen and actually spoke to briefly are the ones whose door faces mine. The only reason why I even ended up communication with them was because sometimes when I come out they end up coming out the same time as I, so I have no choice but to say hi. I am really not a nosy type of person so I never made it a point to meet my neighbors. No one hangs out outside, I don’t either. The only time when I am seen next to my building is when I get the mail or walk in or from my car. Everyone else is the same way. Everyone has really different schedules so I pretty much never bump into anyone. I guess we are not the friendliest bunch of folks around here. No baking cookies for the neighbors going on here.


Another six months of
"Oh Yeah F%$k me harder"
then, yet another Wahhh, wahhh!


Don’t jinx it forumfishie. I have been very happy with their non-existent sex life. Perhaps lady purple is right though, maybe there is no more ‘couple’, perhaps they did split. Knowing how much of a screamer the gal is though, I am surprised I still haven’t heard anything when she goes downtown herself.


White noise is supposed to be the best way to block other sounds, but pretty much anything that is steady in tone qualities and volume will do


I tried sleeping with the TV on, but usually I end up waking up to Kevin Trudeau scamming people out of money with his “miracle book” or a commercial coming on with the volume blasting higher than the program (no idea why that happens) which usually makes me jump from being startled quite fast.
 hungry_joe
Joined: 6/24/2006
Msg: 40
view profile
History
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/26/2010 8:19:29 PM
I'm sure it was said but I read throught the first paragraph and half of the orginal post and had an answer: MOVE. Nuff said now you quit crying.
 That Handy Man
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 41
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/28/2010 10:19:48 PM
I once rented an apartment, especially on the top floor, end of the hall. Sizing up the building, I thought this would afford me privacy. What I didn't realize is that the end apartments wrapped around the stair well, meeting at the end! And, my neighbours had a very noisy infant! Something, I have trouble with! I ended up, switching my office (second much smaller bedroom) for my master bedroom with en suit bath!

Seems that what we most resist, persists!
 DemonLeather
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 42
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/29/2010 11:19:27 AM
Quit your cryin' which was worse? the fukkin' or tha cryin?? Personally I don't mind people fukkin,.I can go to sleep easy,. usually makes for so interesting dreams Kids cryin' ...that's different perhaps you should talk to the mother about a muzzle, or a baby bubble that's sound proof.
I really don't know what to tell you.. well,. except you DID learn a VALUABLE lesson.. if you fukk all night long, eventually you WILL have a cryin kid! Heed & Learn!! (Heck,.. look at Annie!.. did she live in your building TOO!??
 GrandmaBooBoo
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 43
view profile
History
Wahh Wahh All Night Long!
Posted: 10/29/2010 8:49:37 PM
I'm rather intrigued with the number of people who consider the "reason" for the child's abnormal amount of crying as a valid excuse to tell ANYONE who pays rent to just..."ignore it"! I have to wonder when did it become so popular to use children to justify all sorts of selfish, associal behavior?

First of all, the REASON the child is crying, whether it's "ALL" night, "EVERY" night...or simply with enough frequency and at such a time which interrupts the sleep of OTHER PAYING TENNANTS, is unacceptable. Most people have enough compassion and understanding that they are more than willing to grant some leniency for new parents , and accept that there will be some crying and floor pacing in the middle of the night for the first 2 or 3 months until the infant is sleeping through the night.

I suspect that what MAY have occurred here is that the parents....eager to carry on like bunnies, had had the child sleeping in the same room and NOW that he's more curious about Mommy's screams (which wake him up) they've had to move him to his very own room so they can continue with the bunny routine. I have to agree with the "abuse" scenario...though from the sounds of what we've read here....I would doubt that it's physical abuse...at least at this point. Children will usually become quiet once they realize that it stops the abuse. Emotional abuse (neglect) however, only heightens the child's screams for attention. In either case, yes; obviously something needs to be done by "someone" because even if the OP is "only exaggerating" by say....75%, this is NOT a normal habit for a healthy, happy 2 yr. old.

More to the point however, I suppose that it doesn't shock me that the OP has endured this distrubance for 2+ years without complaining to the landlord. We've certainly become a society where those who BREAK rules have all the "rights"...and those who ask to have their rights respected are riduclued. (See Posts 5 & 8 for a perfect example).

I would have called the police about 18 months ago to report a distrurbance of the peace (in the wee hours of the morning) and possible child endangerment; followed by a call to the landlord to report the habitual disturbance. If this did not remedy the situation, then I would informed the landlord that HE had broken the lease by NOT maintaining the residence as agreed in the lease. (This is assuming that the lease has the standard language in regard to quiet hours, respecting the rights of the OTHER tennants, etc).

Unfortunately, if the landlord is not in residence, he probably couldn't care less....as you wouldn't be knocking on HIS door at 4am asking him to PLEASE...do his damned job...and maintain the facility. That leaves you with only the option of MOVING, and BEFORE you sign another lease....check with other tennants to see IF management actually manages the buildings...or if they just collect the rent checks and disappear.
Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > Wahh Wahh All Night Long!