Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > humor  > more blonde jokes      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 51
more blonde jokesPage 3 of 25    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25)
Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home?
A: She moved.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 52
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/9/2010 10:14:46 AM
Q: Why did the blonde try and steal a police car?
A: On the back she saw "911" and thought it was a Porsche.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 53
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/10/2010 6:13:04 AM
Q: How do you measure their intelligence?
A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in their ear.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 54
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/15/2010 7:13:30 AM
How do you regonize a blonde in school?
They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 55
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/16/2010 9:48:33 AM
The blonde couldn't call 911 because she couldn't find the 11 button on the phone.
 Molly Maude
Joined: 9/11/2008
Msg: 56
view profile
History
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/16/2010 3:30:49 PM
just when I think you can't make me laugh out loud AGAIN ...

... you come up with yet ANOTHER one! OMG! that's so true, tho ... EVERYONE says ... "Quick! Call NINE-ELEVEN!" ... everyone ... what's a girl to do ....

where's the public service announcements for blondes?

...
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 57
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/16/2010 8:33:46 PM
where's the public service announcements for blondes?


easy there, a blonde might take the word 'service' announcement wrong lol

sorry- couldn't resist

so glad that you get a laugh out of these- that's what it's all about- laughter and being able

to laugh at myself/ oneself etc

I'm going to be doing some short one liners like that for a while- got a lot going on ')

Here you go: The blonde couldn't work at the pharmaceutical company because she couldn't fit the bottles in the typewriter.

 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 58
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/16/2010 8:43:47 PM
Saturday's/Sunday's joke in case I'm still sick

The blonde couldn't go water skiing because she couldn't find a lake with a slope on it.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 59
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/18/2010 10:54:00 AM
The blonde returned a scarf because she thought it was too tight.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 60
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/19/2010 8:33:01 AM
The blonde asked for directions to her neighbors house.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 61
view profile
History
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/19/2010 3:16:44 PM
Ohmygod, sowrite, PLEASE keep these coming. I write fine prose, and occasionally acceptable poetry and song, but I haven't been able to write a joke since I was four.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 62
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/19/2010 3:42:33 PM
Igor- thanks ;)
Hmmm...then I suggest taking a a brief departure into writing jokes, as I'm having difficulty with my poetry and prose at the moment. It definitely cleanses the mental palate. I only write some of the jokes- I pull a lot from internet searches.

The ones I write are from true life lol.

Here's one just for you:

A Blonde who got a fishing rod for her birthday and decided to go ice fishing. So early the next morning she got all her gear and headed out. When she reached her destination she cut a hole in the ice and dipped the rod in. Then suddenly she heard a voice that said:"there's no fish in there". So she moves to another spot and cuts another hole, then the same voice spoke again and told her there were no fish there. So she moves again and the voice tells her there are no fish there. So she looks up and see's a man looking down at her. "How do you know there are no fish there?" So the man cooly says "Well first of all this is a hockey rink and you're going to have to pay for those holes.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 63
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/21/2010 8:32:56 AM

No problem , the label says concentrate.


thanks for sharing kessick!

The blonde went to Italy to see if she could buy the "lovely boot" she saw on the map.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 64
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/21/2010 9:03:37 AM
One night we were having church when the lights went out. We were all looking around trying to find the problem when one of the blondes ran outside. In just a few short minutes she came running back inside the church and as serious as she could be, said, "Hey you guys my lights are working in my car."
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 65
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/21/2010 8:59:13 PM
woah...! kessick- thanks for the contributions but keep them PG lol.

Molly - close your eyes on that last one

Love that second joke kessick- here's one to mirror it:

There was a man outside mowing his lawn. He lived next store to a blonde who had just gotten a computer. She went out to her mailbox to check the mail and went back in after she had done that 10 times the guy asked her why she kept coming back out side and she said my computer keeps telling me I have mail.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 66
view profile
History
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/22/2010 1:57:42 PM
"This is a little bit racy. What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head ? A brunette with bad breath. Sorry folks ."
If you stand a blonde on her head, aren't you supposed to get a being with two "heads," each with five painted protuberances? It's not funny, but the picture is accurate. As I said, I can't do jokes, so maybe someone can do something with the toes.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 67
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/22/2010 8:15:55 PM
Igor I'm confused lol. Here's the joke within your joke---that a blonde joke is to be taken literally lol- an oxymoron. ;)

Q: Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months?
A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 68
view profile
History
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/23/2010 1:37:20 PM
My taking things literally has confused my teachers for years. It helps me work out solutions to strange problems though!
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 69
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/23/2010 6:51:05 PM
Oh I understand completely. have left brain/ right brain balance and the men in my family are very literal.
When you figure out the age old dilemmas between men and women,,,do tell. ;)
( I know, no logic there, right?)

This one's for you Igor- maybe not the greatest, but I know you enjoy the science (/phil)
forum:

There were three woman at an American college eating lunch. There was a Russian, American, and a Blonde. They were all bragging about their countries.
The Russian said," We were the first in space."
The American said," We were the first on the moon."
The Blonde said," Well, we will be the first on the sun."
The Russian said," You cannot do that or you will burn up!"
"Duh! We'll go at night." the Blonde replied.
 JP1111
Joined: 4/13/2008
Msg: 70
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/24/2010 2:25:06 PM
How do you know when a blond has used a computer?

There's whiteout on the screen
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 71
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/26/2010 10:08:14 PM
Good ones JP & Kessick- thanks for sharing :)

Keeping with the holiday spirit:

Q. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman?
A. Cause you have to hollow out it's head!
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 72
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/27/2010 10:24:07 AM
A blonde walked into a doctor's office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked her, "What happened to your ear?" The blonde replied, "I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.
Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, "Well, what happened to the other ear?"
"They called back!"
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 73
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/27/2010 3:22:29 PM
Dan99993

Q. Why was the blonde in the tree?
A. Because she was raking up the leaves!
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 74
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/27/2010 4:22:40 PM
they're all too funny- i'm very visual lol

Two bowling teams, one of all blondes and one of all brunettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City. The brunette team rides in the bottom of the bus and the blonde team rides on the top level.
The brunette team down below is whooping it up having a great time, when one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs, so she decides to go up and investigate.
When the brunette reaches the top, she finds all the blondes frozen in fear, staring straight ahead at the road and clutching the seats in front of them. They all have white knuckles.
The brunette asks, "What the heck's goin' on up here? We're having a great time downstairs!"
One of the blondes looks up and says to her, "Yeah, but you've got a driver!"
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 75
more blonde jokes
Posted: 12/27/2010 9:35:35 PM
it's okay, we don't realize it
Show ALL Forums  > humor  > more blonde jokes