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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Are single parent women scared of younger men?      Home login  
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 CallmeKen
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 5
Are single parent women scared of younger men?Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)

I've noticed anytime talking to a single mother, they seem to be very indifferent to the idea of going out on a date or for a drink.

Of course - by definition they already have children. Why should they date one?


Or do they not feel the younger man can take on the responsibilities of having a child in their life.

I don't think you quite understand the money drain a child represents. Anything you enjoy doing? Forget about it. You are simply a wage slave for the little poop machine. Why do you want that so early in life?
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 6
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 7:08:36 AM
You tend to see it mentioned often in these forums that alot of guys seem to see single moms as 'easy prey' sexually.

Is it any wonder a single mom has no use for a 21 year old boy? To her, more than l ikely, he's just yet another one looking at her as an easy mark.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 7
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Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 8:19:57 AM
Going out at night for a date or drinks is a real treat, but many times it takes hiring a babysitter which can be expensive. Also, most women will look at a man as a strong possibility for a relationship or not, if not then why pay the babysitter or get involved at all.
 SpecificTruths
Joined: 9/19/2009
Msg: 8
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 10:58:26 AM
^^^ That's all fine and dandy for advice, but precluding that, I'd question why you'd want anything to do with a single mom when you're childless and 21 years old. Date someone who's not tied down to children, like yourself. You may want to go on vacation at a moment's notice or something, and women love spontenaity... unless they have a kid or two at home.
 CallmeKen
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 9
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 3:21:38 PM

You don't have to be the bio dad any more, just someone who went out with her and who the children recognize as mom's bf...

So a woman can have a cup of coffee with a guy, coach her kid and sue him for 18 years of child support? Dang, and I thought Texas laws were tough.

I don't know where you heard such BS. Children under 18 are not even allowed in the courthouse, never mind testifying if a man is "mommy's bf." You are not financially responsible for a child tht is not biologically yours or adopted unless you marry the woman or live with her for 7 years (by common law).
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 10
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 3:53:52 PM

The gent knew the woman and her kid for all of 8 months. He's on the hook.


i'd be so gone out of this country if that ever happened to me...

lol
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 11
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 5:44:24 PM
OP,can I ask,what do YOU think YOU do to "scare" a woman with a child???? Just the wording alone of your question proves to a few that you shouldn't go near a mother and her child,no matter the age of the "woman".

I can name quite the list of things that you probably don't have that a mother would find attractive, and I'm not a mother. Can you give us a list of things that YOU find attractive in a woman with a child?????

I don't see one good reason why you are even thinking of "dating", "having a drink" or whatever with a young lady that has a child.

Sorry, I just thought of that ONE. You can date the mommy only if she has given birth to one of your own. That would be about the only one.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 12
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/14/2010 7:31:00 PM
Hey, single mothers. With all the men refusing to date you single mothers, here is one young man at your feet.

Jump on him.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 13
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Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/17/2010 5:33:52 AM
Boondock touched on what I think is the most important thing about this.

Many times in life, you WILL find that while a few years is nothing in time, that it can be a UNIVERSE in experience and change. You might already be able to appreciate this at your age, if you look back at the 17 year old girls who have yet to have experience college, or young girls who haven't been in a serious relationship before. If you have, then when you try to relate to someone who still has not, they seem like little silly kids to you, even though they might only be a couple of years younger in time.
That you immediately think that these women "fear" to get involved is normal, especially as you are so young and inexperienced yourself. Fear is only SORT OF a reasonable description of what one feels when they can see that something just wont work. They likely aren't so much AFRAID to date you, as they are certain that you aren't experienced enough to know what you would REALLY be getting yourself into.
Add to that, that BECAUSE your life has no content that theirs does, that you are just too different from them to be able to relate on even a simple conversational level. This is no different than if you were trying to date women from a completely different cultural background from your own, finding that they too were "indifferent" to your entreaties. Your interests and ideas at this stage, probably contain next to nothing that relates to child-rearing. Perhaps you want to go out and DO things together, in a typical dating fashion. They, on the other hand, are already leading their lives in a firm direction as a parent, and no longer in the experimental stage you are.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 14
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 12/17/2010 11:42:25 AM
I dont think a single parent denying a date equals them being afraid...they, like everyone else, will weigh the possible outcomes and decide what is best...it is just that they ALSO must try and decide what is best for thier children, and perhaps they dont see a young, single man who can come and go as he pleases, as the best thing for thier lives at that moment.

Most parents will want to date someone in the same role as themselves, people who would easliy understand the issues around parenting is all. Not afraid, just pragmatic.

Personally, I have never been attracted to younger men, even when I was a younger woman...My being a parent has nothing to do with it, its just my own personal preferance.

I know some will say a single woman w/kids should not be too choosy, but really, when you add up the fact they are taking time away from thier children, paying for someone to watch them...they should be the choosiest of all...jmo.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 15
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/11/2011 3:52:19 PM
Are some single mothers afraid of dating younger guys because they don't want them to leave?
Nope, no fear here.

Or do they not feel the younger man can take on the responsibilities of having a child in their life.
I'm sure SOME could.


My reason? I have two boys, don't need another.
Plus, I can't handle the thought of our future; me smacking dentures while my youngish bf changing my depends.
 UniquelyPassionateCandy
Joined: 8/6/2011
Msg: 17
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/9/2011 12:33:40 AM

No offence to you at all,
I am 31, single , and have 2 young gals. Yes I am afraid of dating a younger men for a number of reasons :
Most younger men (under 30) nowadays don't seem to have direction, ambition, maturity, family orientation, strong morals or values and stability. Please don't take this personally. I am a woman who is older than her years and has experienced more than most who are even 10 years older than me. What I look for in a man is...stabitity, not relying on mommy, open mined and independance...I just don't see this in most men younger than me (31 yrs) and I will not subject my children to someone who is less mature and stable than me.


Well said :) It's not just since I have been a single mom myself. I have always been attracted to older men. I have never dated or had a relationship with a younger guy. But now moreso then before I had kids, do I find myself less responsive to a younger guy who expresses interest in me. I am a single mom with 2 kids, and I just don't see it working out with a younger guy when I am looking for something more serious. I do get quite a few messages from guys who are 19-24 on here, but I don't think they want the same thing I do.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 18
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/9/2011 7:01:46 AM
I am not scared of younger men, it just simply is not my preference.
I prefer older men (mid-late 30's, 40's, maybe early 50's), absolutely nothing against the younger crowd, just what captures my attraction.

I think it is dumb when people refer to younger men as children though, being in one's 20's is hardly a child. I know i certainly had a very adult life in my 20's, so why they feel the need to say that, i do not know.

But anyways, there seems to be tons of women into younger men, some even take pride in being called "cougars" or something like that.
 Inexperience
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 19
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/9/2011 7:12:38 AM
Well the game pretty much changes when a child is introduced to the picture i'm talking your prioritys in life, hobbies everything changes. You aren't on the same level of thinking as she is since she's the one with a child she needs to think whats best for her kid and even goes for the partners she dates.

One of the reasons why I don't date single mothers is I don't have kids of my own and I like doing things on a moments notice. I see it as if you plan on dating someone with a child as a serious long term relationship you should also consider being a father to because your getting the whole package otherwise if you can't do it then don't because you'd be hurting two people instead instead of one. Most guys your age aren't ready for that type of responsiblity or don't want to be tied down. Some guys are but most aren't.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 20
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/9/2011 10:39:55 AM

they seem to be very indifferent to the idea of going out on a date or for a drink.

hmmm could it have anything to do with you listing that you want an "intimate encounter" as listed in your profile...?

Well, whats the age range you are looking for? Im 36 and laugh at the thought of even considering dating someone whos only 22. If you are sticking to closer to your age range, then Id wonder why are you narrowing your search to single mothers? This is the height of your fun times. Enjoy them. Dont pounce on the single mom's.
 mrcs84
Joined: 12/9/2008
Msg: 22
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Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/9/2011 8:01:14 PM
There's a preconcieved notion that younger men are immature. I guess that being able to hit the "print" button on the human xerox machine automatically makes you not only mature, but more mature than any man that is "younger."
 ForumFlashLight
Joined: 5/16/2011
Msg: 24
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 11/17/2011 9:01:31 AM
Afraid? No.

Realistic concern? yes.

Younger men...you don't say age ranges, but you're 21.

All ages these days are parents, even some fifteen year old boys are parents.

It's about, are you mature enough to handle the woman you're eyeing?

I won't even date a 35 year old, even though that's usually an adult age for men.

Before going on a few good dates I thought I might have to open up the range to 60!

It's all the priorities and decisions and choices, being made through the filter of maturity and good sense...or NOT.

If you can hold a conversation with her, that does not mean you can hold her interest emotionally or intellectually.

Being in a similar life space is very important.
 Ariadne7
Joined: 7/11/2010
Msg: 25
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Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 2/26/2012 9:50:19 PM
Hi goldenlocket,

I tried PMing you but your inbox won't accept anything from someone of my stats details (gender, etc.) lol.

So here it is:

I'm in a similar situation as yourself, currently dating a man 10 years my junior. I have one child (4 yrs old) and he has none. I've usually dated my peer age group, only once entered into a relationship with a man much older (13 years), and a couple of times dated 'younger men' before, but I'm finding this time it is very different with a child.

I'm really impressed with how long your relationship has lasted, and agree about the choice to go for men with a bit 'lighter' baggage. My question is: Were there ever any doubts about whether your young man could be the right stuff to be a good father for your kids? Were there things you found you had to 'train' him in? Or was he just naturally attentive and supportive?

Any insights or parts of your experience that you'd like to share with me are most appreciated.

For me, I've actually broken up with my young man on at least a few occasions already in just the 7 months of our 'dating', partly because he does not seem stable/dependable enough and partly because he just doesn't seem to have the skills/adequate practice to be emotionally communicative..I guess I'm not sure how much of this is an age thing, or possibly more a personal development thing...And I'm really reflecting now on the young woman who clarified: "I won't subject my children to someone who is less mature or stable than me"..would you say that in your case, things can sometimes work with someone less mature and stable? I am sincerely curious.

Anyhow, I hope I haven't imposed myself too much into this thread.
Again, anything you'd like to share will be most welcome.

Thank you
 amandabug36
Joined: 9/9/2010
Msg: 26
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/2/2012 4:41:06 PM
Im a single mother. Im 31 and for me its not about a guys age, its about there intent.
Ive been dating long enough to have met mr.player mr cheater, mr liar, mr....everything. we have our guard up already. Its not just because your young, it because we've been aroud the block a few times. Because we have a child involved its just not us it would be affecting if things didnt workout. Are you just guy that wants to run back to your friends n say i banged an older chick? Its all about the guys intent. If you prove you re wnting more then a lay then you might get somewhere. We would probably be hesitant at for but youd have to prove us wrong. Good luck. We have walls you have to get through
 00_000_0000
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 27
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/4/2012 6:42:10 PM
ye honestly I have been approached by younger guys a few times and it bothers me for several reasons. First is that my brother is only a few years younger so I feel like i am dating his friends, and second is that I feel like they aren't ready to handle the responsibility of having a kid. I don't want anyone else to take care of
 friendlygirl63
Joined: 3/2/2012
Msg: 28
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/5/2012 11:39:58 PM
You are right..and they don't need to see fail again..that why so have only one way you must show all by honest and sincere and make they believe you really serious relationship..
 jessrar9
Joined: 2/6/2012
Msg: 29
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/6/2012 8:50:04 AM
Maybe it's because you are just looking for an intimate incounter and the "420" in the name doesn't help.

I am 23 and want nothing to do with a younger man or even men my age for that matter, as most - not all - most, are too immature and don't have their life "in order" yet.
 beautybutterfly5000
Joined: 2/26/2012
Msg: 30
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/11/2012 6:18:01 PM
I am a single mom and will not date anyone younger than me because of the maturity level of men opposed to women. I want someone who has his stuff together not wanting to play video games and party all night
 Siks6
Joined: 1/13/2012
Msg: 31
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/11/2012 6:27:59 PM

I am a single mom and will not date anyone younger than me because of the maturity level of men opposed to women.

Very stereotypical of you Goes both ways..
 friendshipcomesfirst
Joined: 5/19/2011
Msg: 32
Are single parent women scared of younger men?
Posted: 3/11/2012 10:29:12 PM
I suppose it would depend on the moms that you are hitting up... My oldest are coming up on 13 and 14 years old... at 21, you are 7 yrs older than my son and ten younger than me... so I would pass... I want my man to be able to connect with me on an adult level.

I do date younger men. Just not as young as you with no kids. I have plenty of kids, I'm dead set on never having another baby. It's easy at your age to say, I don't want kids... then, when your "clock" starts ticking (yup, happens to men too, especially if they don't have any kids yet) around 35 or 40... I'd be 50... what then?

also, I agree with fyre... you have 420 in your name... most single moms would shut things down right there...
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