Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner i      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 255
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheatingPage 12 of 15    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)
The whole legal framework is in a state of flux and is being defined rather randomly... and yes this prosecutor is trying to get his name in case law as a career stepping stone for sure.... but the whole issue is about where the data is located.... if the email(data) is resident on the local PC simple property rights and joint ownership apply... if the data(email) resides offsite in the gmail computers... then there is a privacy issue.... the work around is to use a keylogger snooper program on the local pc... then all keystrokes are the intellectual property of the originating device and it sidesteps ownership and location issues of data.... this also bumps into civil rights issues as well where the government might snoop your offsite accounts without a warrant or probable cause..... the prosecutor is probably trying to get this global issue as well on the books so he will make a name for him/herself.... and then what also applies is where the actual resident server is located off/onshore

BTW only US mail has assigned privacy rights but not UPS, Fedex, email, junk mail... etc

Abe please comment on my post.... your insights are quite stellar on most topics... and I really value your thoughts
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 256
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 7:57:33 AM
BTW only US mail has assigned privacy rights but not UPS, Fedex, email, junk mail... etc
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 257
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 8:09:42 AM
I simply wanted to point out that claiming "marital property " entitled him to use his stbx-wifes' computer, seems like a pretty thin defense to me.

Why? They're married. It's the same as looking through a chest of drawers she keeps her stuff in. It's still in the house and regardless of what you think about it, looking through her things isn't illegal or a misuse of a chest of drawers. It doesn't even need to be justified.

Most rational divorcing couples that I've ever known( the key word there being rational) did have some degree of respect...

What people agree to do amicably has nothing to do with what they could do legally. My dad practiced family law for 40 years and I assure you, there are a lot of couples who do crazy things. He had a guy pull a gun on him for representing the guy's wife. The computer issue here is nothing.

The fact that throughout the various narratives we've been exposed to regarding this issue, the computer is referred to as "her computer".

Since they weren't divorced and a judge hasn't awarded her the computer in a settlement, it doesn't matter how it's referred to in the media. What matters is who the legal owner is and I imagine that ,legally, it's a marital asset. I can't see how it could not be, since that hadn't been argued and decided through the divorce.

And do we know for sure that he accessed email STORED on that particular computers' hard drive-or did he actually access her email account on the gmail servers?

It really doesn't matter, because if he accessed the gmail servers without authorization, that would be a slam dunk if there was a case there. Having a password to a computer (or account on a computer) doesn't imply authorization to access it. Those cases are prosecuted all the time and won with no difficulty or controversy. If there was a case there, the prosecutor would have jumped on it. In that case, the charge would really be about reading his wife's email in a way that's intuitively obvious.

Gmail owns the gmail servers, so it would be easy to show that gmail didn't authorize access if that was a real question. Instead, the prosecutor is attempting to use a staute in a way the statute wasn't meant to be used because the actual issue of reading his wife's email was a non-starter. If your spouse looks through a drawer you keep things in and the drawer is in the dwelling in which you both reside, is that illegal? Is it illegal if the drawer is locked? How is that different from a computer that is in a dwelling in which you both reside? (I'm assuming the computer isn't owned by an employer or someone for whom explicit authorization is necessary. If she worked for the department of defense and her husband accessed a department of defense computer, for example, the case would be clear cut, even if he knew the passwords.) That isn't the case here. His wife uses a laptop that is hers only through some understanding they had, not because it's hers in any legal sense.

Perhaps the Oakland County judicial system is considering that this has potential to be a precedent-setter,

That has a way of backfiring if a precedent gets set and the ramifications aren't clear until later. No two cases are the same, so the precedent applies to any case that a lawyer can analogize it to and support with a convincing argument. That's what they get paid to do. If you want to see the epitome of that art, read the majority and dissenting opinion for almost any 5-4 Supreme Court ruling.

 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 258
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 2:58:21 PM
The FACT is it is a shared computer if you had bothered to read the OP it states......

But as I recall it, some of the outside sources I looked at did refer to it as "her" computer. Granted, due to the divorce not being finalized and signed off on at the time of the incident-neither the man or the woman had any separate property.While most married couples do have some respect for certain boundaries, until the divorce is granted, it is in fact THEIR wallet, THEIR purse, THEIR dressers and THEIR dresser drawers. I stand corrected, I should not expect that any boundaries be set-or observed-in a marriage,because as a matter of law, everything is THEIR property, not his or hers. As for the matter of the email-is THAT also both their property? Apparently there was some doubt about how he obtained it-which is why he is charged with a crime.


reading her e-mail
is her email marital property too-even if he had to access her account on the gmail servers? If a wife or husband locks an item of" marital propery" in a drawer at someone else's home, is it legal for the other spouse to enter that home uninvited and break into the drawer to access that marital property?
Before someone tells me to "don't be ridiculous"

My dad practiced family law for 40 years and I assure you, there are a lot of couples who do crazy things. He had a guy pull a gun on him for representing the guy's wife. The computer issue here is nothing.
so yeah, one spouse might decide that "marital property" permitted him or her to access someone elses' premises to obtain that marital property. Who is "in the wrong" in that scenario? I'm talking about something on the order of a small item that someone could easily consider as his or her own belonging-with some monetary value but not on the magnitude of say, a car, cash money,a boat...you get the picture.Who is in the wrong?

He had full rights to be on the computer.

but did he have the right to access HER email? Especially if he accessed it on gmails' server? If you use a computer you have "full rights to be on", to steal information, run a scam, defraud someone, access sensitive information,that is a crime, even to the level of a felony.
Or perhaps...itseems...Maybe ...or maybe...


Its' all just speculation on everybody's part right now... a good topic for debate on several aspects.
My personal opinion is that it could go either way.
I was looking more at the "trying the case in the media" and the "spin" thing that has so many people believing that this is about a husband snooping in his wifes' email to find out if she was cheating-instead what it really is, a divorcing couples' infighting, using the children as pawns.

and yes this prosecutor is trying to get his name in case law as a career stepping stone for sure....

When this first came to everyone's attention, it was a female prosecutor-and of course some made that out to be about women sticking up for each other even when they are in the wrong.
I'm glad to see that this has apparently been now passed on to a male prosecutor. I'd like to have been a fly on the wall or the mouse in the corner to know whats' behind THAT.

the work around is to use a keylogger snooper program on the local pc...
And no one will say this is wrong to do on a private(household) computer, because it helps keep track of what children are doing on the internet.

That has a way of backfiring if a precedent gets set and the ramifications aren't clear until later.

which would be exactly why they are proceeding with utmost caution, IMO.

As I said, my interest was more on the defense strategy/journalistic portrayal of the matter-to see how that works out.
Note the title of this thread. The OP thinks the case is about "snooping to find out if their partner is cheating". The man wasn't 'snooping" to find out about "cheating"-the marriage was pretty much dead, they just weren't done burying it-and the snooping was done in aid of providing a 3rd party with information. It is what I would characterize as divorce issue infighting, using the children as weapons. I hate when people do that-a lefotover from days when I worked in a community service organization assisting troubled families, the elderly, the disadvantaged,etc.
I saw some kids that were pretty screwed up from being used as pawns in the parent's divorce battles. I guess I'd be for just about nything that put a stop to that horsesh*t.
Cindy O
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 259
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 3:09:28 PM

Who is "in the wrong" in that scenario? I'm talking about something on the order of a small item that someone could easily consider as his or her own belonging-with some monetary value but not on the magnitude of say, a car, cash money,a boat...you get the picture.Who is in the wrong?

I don't think you're getting it. If you pawned your husband's watch, could you be prosecuted for felony theft?

The man wasn't 'snooping" to find out about "cheating"-the marriage was pretty much dead, t

That isn't necessarily true either. If you ask a divorce lawyer he/she will tell you to NOT date anyone until the divorce is final. It CAN affect the settlement, so it's perfectly reasonable to go look for that anytime before the divorce is final. Spouses and their attorneys do that ALL the time.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 260
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 3:25:17 PM

If you ask a divorce lawyer he/she will tell you to NOT date anyone until the divorce is final

Yet people do it all the time. They leave their spouse and move in with the new interest.
Not saying that makes it right...just an observation. And, unless it has since been done away with, I believe there still may be some laws on the MI books regarding adultery.
Hell, here in MI we prosecute capsized, wet, mad canoeists for swearing in front of women and children.
I think the observation could be made, from witnessing my, and another poster from another penisular state, that people who live on peninsulas can be difficult and contrary.
Oh-and the watch thing...suppose my husband knew I might do such a thing, so he locked his watch in a desk drawer at the home of a friend. Could I be proscuted for an unauthorized/unlawful entrance into that friends home and breaking into that drawer to obtain that marital property-IT IS marital property,after all. Does the fact that it is stored elsewhere-where I do not have any right or authorization to go-fade in the face of it being marital property?
Cindy O
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 261
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 4:07:05 PM
Yet people do it all the time.

Lawyers can only advise clients to do what's in their client's best interests. They have no power to enforce it.

Hell, here in MI we prosecute capsized, wet, mad canoeists for swearing in front of women and children.

That's a seperate topic.

Oh-and the watch thing...suppose my husband knew I might do such a thing, so he locked his watch in a desk drawer at the home of a friend. Could I be proscuted for an unauthorized/unlawful entrance into that friends home and breaking into that drawer to obtain that marital property-IT IS marital property,after all.

Be serious. Breaking into someone else's residence is, at the very least, breaking and entering.

Does the fact that it is stored elsewhere-where I do not have any right or authorization to go-fade in the face of it being marital property?

No. It still is marital property. You are entitled to go through any legal means to obtain it.
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 262
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 4:40:29 PM

Does the fact that it is stored elsewhere-where I do not have any right or authorization to go-fade in the face of it being marital property?

No. It still is marital property. You are entitled to go through any legal means to obtain it.




At the time of my divorce I had sent some diamonds to a jeweler to be reset as a surprise gift to her because we were having issues... trying to stupidly buy her affections.... bad idea... but the jeweler got the idea (from my own words) that a divorce /separation was in the works but not yet filed and attempted to place them in "safe storage" until released by court order while assessing hefty "management fees".... I asserted my joint property rights and threatened suit for unlawful conversion of property to the jeweler to get them back in my possession and they later became a bargaining chip in the settlement equity process... good thing I knew enough of my rights...
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 263
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 6/29/2011 5:45:21 PM
I mentioned the prosecution of the "cursing canoeist" to indicate-and illustrate- that here in MI we do have some odd and outdated/irrelevant laws on the books, OR ways of interpreting them. I was making a point about Michigan law-which I believe IS related to the topic here, since it is happening in Michigan. Is that enough clarification?
As far as the watch being in someone else's house-and having to use LEGAL means to get it-could we consider this womans' email to be on non-marital premises( the gmail server),did the accused use "legal means" to obtain it? IS email "marital property"?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/40820892/ns/technology_and_science-security

Man faces charges for reading wife's e-mail

Husband used his wife's password to access her Gmail inbox


That is from the OT. Of course-what is meant by GMail inbox? IF she uses an email access program that is part of the computers' installed software-does that mean that the email is physically residing in the hard drive of this marital property computer,so that it is (as some claim) legal for the stbx-husband to read it? If he accessed it directly via the Gmail log-in page( on the web)-would that be considered illegal access since he and the stbx-wife don't own Gmail server?

I think it is clear that this is-to say the least-a complex matter.
And despite the trend to try and make understanding of the laws of the land extremely DIFFICULT-requiring the assistance of a person who charges a few hundred bucks an hour. I always understood that one of the things that the founding fathers were trying to achieve,was that the laws and their administration would not be incredibly difficult to understand by a reasonable man(person, if you prefer the PC version).

Yes, I know, the Founding Fathers did not foresee computers,the internet,automatic weapons,50% divorce rate,etc. etc. More complex environments require more complex laws-I'm not arguing that point at all.

I just think it will be interesting to see how this all shakes out.

And the most recent message posted by gentleplus, might serve to illustrate how willing some persons or entities may be to take advantage of complexities for their own gain or benefit.

Yes, I mean for that statement to be as broadly interpreted as anyones' little heart desires.
Cindy O
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 264
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 8/27/2011 1:51:40 AM
Latest news I've seen on this is The Michigan Court of Appeals has halted the case while it considers a motion to dismiss and the charges of him "attempting" to "hack" the police computer database have been dropped. He didn't attempt to get into the database. He simply asked questions about it in an open manner and in a knee jerk reaction the prosecutor decided to slap a charge on him. Seems the prosecutor is the arsehole in the whole case.

As I find out more I'll post more but it's looking pretty dang good that he is going to walk on this.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 265
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 8/27/2011 12:11:34 PM
What about when someone hires a PI to follow their spouse around? Isn't that an invasion of privacy? No laws against that I am aware of.

I didn't hire someone. I asked my husband's GF's ex-husband (that's a mouthful) to take some pictures. He was a cop and had access that I didn't have. He did, he gave them to me and I handed them to my husband. He still tried the "It isn't what it looks like...." lingo. Ummmm ~ I may not be all that bright, but I know a BJ in a car when I see one in print. Needless to say? I bought her ex a drink, sent the husband to her house, sent her flowers and lived happily ever after. Sometimes what we "know" and what we "KNOW" can surely set us free. As for snooping? I don't bother. I'm not married, no one truly owes me anything more than honesty the best they can muster and if it's not working ~ well, we both have the option to walk away. I learned over the years that there really are some things I'd just rather not know, because I likely already KNOW. And when I KNOW? I'm not sticking around long, no need for visuals or verifications at that point. At least not for me. JMO
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 266
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 8/28/2011 12:59:25 PM

For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating...
Might be singing a different tune depending on the outcome of this case:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/40820892/ns/technology_and_science-security

Man faces charges for reading wife's e-mail

Husband used his wife's password to access her Gmail inbox

Leon Walker, 33, who says he learned of his wife's affair by reading her e-mail on their computer, faces trial on felony computer misuse charges.


ROCHESTER HILLS, Mich. — A Michigan man who says he learned of his wife's affair by reading her e-mail on their computer faces trial Feb. 7 on felony computer misuse charges.

Thirty-three-year-old Leon Walker used his wife's password to get into her Gmail account. Clara Walker filed for a divorce, which was granted this month.

Leon Walker tells The Oakland Press of Pontiac he was trying to protect the couple's children from neglect and calls the case a "miscarriage of justice."

Oakland County Assistant Prosecutor Sydney Turner says the charge is justified.

Privacy law writer Frederick Lane tells the Detroit Free Press the law typically is used to prosecute identity theft and stealing trade secrets. He says he questions if a wife can expect privacy on a computer she shares with her husband.


I suggest that everyone newly come to this topic read the link offered in the OT and I believe there have been subsequent posts offering links to stories that add more information.

In my opinion, this story came about for reasons other than pure journalistic reporting of the news.
As for snooping in someone else's email, their wallet, their cell phone, I don't see myself doing that unless it was in aid of preventing harm done by a REAL crime.

I am not particularly in favor of 'snooping' in a marital or family situation, but neither do I support it being made into an actionable offense...the occasions where "snooping "is "justified" are rare, but they do exist.

Also, let me make it clear that my personal opinions about this case do NOT reflect that I am taking the wifes' side,the husbands' side or that anyone is being oppressed or wronged.
My personal opinion is that the reporter(s) and editors(s) who allowed themselves-IN MY OPINION-to become a tool of the defendant and his represention, did the PUBLIC a disservice by using misleading headlines/lead captions.

I realize that this opinion is not directly about snooping or prosecuting a snoop-but to speak to the question raised by the distorted information, and give my personal answer, I would not "snoop" in a spouse,SOs, friends or relatives' email except in very limited,narrow and VERY dire circumstances-I'm talking about REAL crime/REAL danger.
To snoop on suspicion of "cheating"? No, I wouldn't. So I don't guess I'll ever go to jail for THAT particular transgression.
Cindy O
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 268
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 9/7/2011 12:02:03 PM
update.

Taken from Leon Walkers Facebook page :

Yesterday the Michigan Court of Appeals, after reviewing the Circuit Court's opinion on why the case should proceed and both the Defense & Prosecution briefs regarding the proceedings, GRANTED Leon's motion for Leave to Appeal. This not only continues the stay placed on the case, but it allows the Court of Appeals to take the case, review additional briefs, and dismiss the charges if they decide to do so. Needless to say, the writing is on the wall.

In other action, the OC Prosecutor appealed to the Michigan Supreme Court on the second/vindictive charge in hopes that they would would prosecution on that charge to continue. They were quickly DENIED. Another rebuke of the Prosecutor from a higher court.

Justice is occurring in bits and pieces, but victor is within sight!

https://www.facebook.com/official.leon.walker.legal.defense


For those interested/FWIW
http://leonwalker.com/
He's still using the media...now to solicit donations for his defense fund.

I did not find any similar site for his ex-wife.
Cindy O


Of course there isn't one for the wife. She isn't having to defend herself. She has the state going after him.
 romeoproductionz
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 269
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 9/7/2011 1:29:26 PM
my soon to be ex is a snoop...it only shows how weak they are...i refuse to be spying on a person...crazy how people will try to "keep you in line" by watching you.. i'd run like hell if a chick wants to spy on me,right after i laugh at her for being a loser..
 cap_n_mORGAN
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 270
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 9/8/2011 11:59:44 AM

Taken from Leon Walkers Facebook page :

Yesterday the Michigan Court of Appeals, after reviewing the Circuit Court's opinion on why the case should proceed and both the Defense & Prosecution briefs regarding the proceedings, GRANTED Leon's motion for Leave to Appeal. This not only continues the stay placed on the case, but it allows the Court of Appeals to take the case, review additional briefs, and dismiss the charges if they decide to do so. Needless to say, the writing is on the wall.

In other action, the OC Prosecutor appealed to the Michigan Supreme Court on the second/vindictive charge in hopes that they would would prosecution on that charge to continue. They were quickly DENIED. Another rebuke of the Prosecutor from a higher court.

Justice is occurring in bits and pieces, but victor is within sight!


It is about time! This was nothing but sour grapes from a ex that got a overzealous prosecutor to do her dirty work.

The state should be held liable for what this cost this man and the prosecutor should be disbarred.




For those interested/FWIW
http://leonwalker.com/
He's still using the media...now to solicit donations for his defense fund.

I did not find any similar site for his ex-wife.
Cindy O


Please explain why she would need a fund when she has her own personal state prosecutor doing her bidding?
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 271
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 9/8/2011 4:42:54 PM
I'm thinking myself it's not looking too good for the state.

Yes I still feel it was not right of him to snoop like he did. BUT I still maintain he broke no laws and should not be charged,thats what this whole thing hinges on.

It doesn't matter if I find his actions deplorable or anyone else does. Until he has committed a crime he should not be charged as such. I still feel he was unjustly charged and hope he walks. The law simply does not fit the charges as I have maintained all along.

I would hope that he is able to seek some form of redress for being dragged thru this mess either against the state,the ex or both.

Any way it turns out it has been a standard setting case,in my eyes.
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 272
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/13/2012 12:50:24 PM
Cleared of snooping charges!

dropped,why? because the witch was doing the same to him...

From the article:

Leon Walker was set to go on trial Monday charged with computer hacking. He was charged in 2010 under the state’s computer hacking law after prosecutors learned he had been reading his wife, Clara Walker’s, e-mail to determine if she was having an affair.

But prosecutors learned late this week that Clara had been doing her own snooping when her attorney in her divorce and custody battle turned over a CD of e-mails by Clara admitting she had been reading text messages on his phone while the two were married in 2009.

“When we learned this, we immediately moved to drop the charges,” said assistant prosecutor Paul Walton. The charge was dismissed this morning. “She is a witness in this case, and it becomes a Fifth Amendment issue.”

http://www.freep.com/article/20120713/NEWS03/120713065/email-snooping-felony-charge-dismissed


All this time and hell he has been put through....
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 273
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/14/2012 11:46:03 AM
i think this is silly. if you are married and you suspect your spouse is cheating on you, well, i think you have a right to know. the manner of discovery shouldn't make a difference. i suppose if the man had the money, he could have hired a private investigator to follow his wife around for a while. i suppose THAT would have been legal, but checking his wife's email is not? give me a break!
 Ed Bear
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 274
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/15/2012 6:18:55 AM
I can't believe how many people believe destroying or disposing of articles like mobile phones is funny. They cost hundreds of dollars (real replacement price, not subsidized hidden-in-fees price) and what that last poster (well, obviously a troll) claimed he did was assault, theft and malicious mischief at least.

Zero, your freedom stops when it hits someone else's.
ED BEAR
 AnAustralianWoman
Joined: 4/26/2012
Msg: 275
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/15/2012 9:01:45 AM

Do you think it's ridiculous?
.....As we say here in Australia.....It only can only happen in America!
The first lesson we are taught is NEVER give out your password or PIN number.
If you DO then YOU are responsible for what goes down.
Would you tell people where you hide the spare key to your house?
First lesson in life? Trust NO ONE...Circumstances change, but we don't alway's change our password, pin, or spare house key location to reflect those changes.
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 276
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/19/2012 3:14:56 PM
Totally exonerated

All charges dropped.

http://www.theoaklandpress.com/articles/2012/07/19/news/local_news/doc50083a5e5471b291951955.txt?viewmode=fullstory

http://www.freep.com/article/20120719/NEWS03/120719053/Prosecutors-drop-computer-hacking-charges-against-Rochester-Hills-man
 MrOogam
Joined: 12/1/2011
Msg: 277
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/19/2012 5:40:24 PM
I wouldn't doubt it, during the beginning of my divorce, I had found numerous evidencary(sp?) items in her car( both names on the title), jointly owned. So I hopped in the car and took off where I could go through & document said items with out her loosing her sanity & self controll. She called the police in the city we lived in, I recieved a call from the Sarg., he was pissed lmao!!... threatening to have me arrested for stealing my own car!!!! Said he would track my cell phone location & arrest me, even though I was in a different county... I aint thast dumb, LMAO!!! I did it any way..stayed gone for half the day, when the Sarg. ordered me to return the car immediately!!!! Got all those items documented, even kept a few for physical evidence if needed. I also got evidence off the family computer, she tried to challenge that as well,passed word protected sshe said. Needless to say it did not get very far once the courts heard our son & daughter saw some of that evidence when they started the 'puter up. It booted up, screen opened to uh huh, there was mom in let's say comprimising postions & situations!!!!Was not funny then, BUT DAMN FUNNY now!!!!! lol... And yes, I fought for , & I retained custody of then an 11 yr old daughter... It is funny, not really, but is at the same time....ah how time heals.....
 friendshipcomesfirst
Joined: 5/19/2011
Msg: 278
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/19/2012 7:36:16 PM
That depends- how did he GET her password... if she shared it with him, saved it on the computer, or left her gmail logged in, it's HER fault...

However, I fail to see how having an affair is connected to neglecting children. I'm a single mom, I date- my kids are well cared for. Dating and raising kids are not mutually exclusive.
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 279
view profile
History
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/19/2012 8:10:50 PM
The case is done.. to sum it up. They dropped the snooping charges when they found out she had been snooping on him before he was charged.

the "Hacking" charges were dropped after there were conflicting stories about whether he had been told not to try to access the data base. He never tried to hack anything.He DID have access to the database as he worked for the county,as a computer technician, whether he was told that he could/could not access the database after the original charges were levied was the point of contention.

All in all he was dragged thru the mud for 2 years by a cheating,vengeful bitter woman and the prosecution should have never tried to stick him with charges they eventually had to drop as they couldn't make anything stick.
 friendshipcomesfirst
Joined: 5/19/2011
Msg: 280
For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating
Posted: 7/19/2012 10:09:47 PM
HOLY CRAP! That wasa a LOT to read through...

Glad it was dropped- I hope both the dads got full custody of the children being as she deemed it appropriate to see a man who had beaten her in front of one of the children. In case anyone didn't know- in all 50 states abusing a person in front of their child IS child abuse... so there is no question, the second husband DID abuse the child (even if only emotionally)

Kinda confused on the whole- she did it too so we'll drop the charges thing... So I guess now two wrongs DO make it right? hmmm...

I hope she is made to pay for ALL of the legal fees- including a HUGE fine for the time the DA wasted on this BS
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > For those that have no qualms snooping to find out if their partner is cheating