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 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 29
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?Page 2 of 44    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
quote]Hoops...

.. yup, a guy can get laid any time he's willing to lay out $100-$200-$300 + for a hooker, once.
A number of men have argued/complained that they've spent that much getting to know a woman they want to date without seeing sex once.

Really? I think many gentlemen on POF would disagree with you. Myself included.

I'm sure they would. However once again their argument isn't about whether it's possible so much as what effort would have to be put in. I also know some men that get offers for it - and oddly enough don't entertain those offers because those women aren't what they want.

Paying money for sex (directly at least) happens to be illegal in the US (in all but 2-3 counties of Nevada). Wave that kind of money, and if you're unlucky you may find yourself staring at a badge. If you're REALLY unlucky, you may find yourself staring at the barrel of a gun. In both cases, sex is a highly unlikely outcome. Well, unless you count being sodomized by a pimp cane as "sex".

In those counties in Nevada then, you're ok. Fly to Nevada and pay for it. This is my point. Sure it's expensive and takes a lot of time, but it's feasible to do. However I doubt MOST men have so little to work with they'd need to hop a flight to Nevada.

Your argument is also groundless as it has no qualifiers. Yes, if I'm willing to do anything, I could get sex. I could probably go out, buy a handgun, kidnap a woman at gunpoint, duct tape her hands and feet, and serially rape her. If you define sex as merely PIV, I could get sex that way. I'm probably sure I would be facing a lifetime of staring at a set of grey bars as well.

True, I didn't say rape or crime was out of the picture. I'd hope that it wasn't a consideration, but OK - ya got me. Again I doubt the picture of getting laid is THAT bleak.

However, if you define sex as a mutually consenting act by two people interested in performing it with each other, then no, guys cannot have sex whenever they want. As I can attest first hand, even marriage does not guarantee that.

OP said "getting laid" which doesn't guarantee mutual interest or attraction, just consent. All that points to is getting sex for the sake of it (at least where I come from).
 DivineBovine
Joined: 5/13/2005
Msg: 30
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History
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 6:25:27 AM

...any woman can get laid, even the physically unattractive...


all of you saying this didn't bother to read the article that the moderator so helpfully provided (since Almost Blonde didn't even write what she posted), or the original article on which that one was based.

...there are entire groups of women who are sexually devalued in a society that privileges youth, whiteness, and a thin-yet-able body. These groups are uniquely denigrated by the statement that women can get laid anytime, because the kind of man who says this is also likely to be the kind who would reject them out of hand.

(Anna North at Jezebel.com)

no, EVERY woman cannot get laid just by lifting a finger and saying yes.
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 31
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 7:08:14 AM
Im sorry but I dont agree with you Devine, any woman can get laid or at least 99% of them can ( if they choose or want to) that's the operative words(if they want to)

I agree there are certain groups of women for what ever reason they think/believe they are unattractive(physical and/or personality-wise),most likely due to fear, brainwashing, lack of sexual desire, unrealistic expectations about sex, or psychological damage. Yes, yes, there are many people out there who do not have sex because they were indoctrinated by their parents to believe "sex is dirty." Sex is dirty only if you let it be that way: no people who are selective about their partners and have loving relationships will ever tell you sex is dirty. Anyone who thinks sex is dirty, IMO is mentally unstable.
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 32
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 7:16:25 AM

Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?


Anyone should be able to see an exaggerated statement when they see one.

If you take it literally...then no. Any woman can't get laid in the front pew on Sunday morning...just because they're horny.

It's an exaggeration and I'm sure he meant that it is much easier for a woman to get laid. And I don't care what anyone says...if a guy and gal of equal physical attractiveness to the opposite sex are put in a social situation...the woman has the advantage. A big one.

Sure...the more attractive you are...the better your chances are....male or female. A very attractive female almost could look at a guy...give him the (come here) finger gesture and watch him skate over on his drool. If the guy tries it...good luck...Chuck.

We're talking about equal amount of effort here. Not paying for it or hanging out at the entrance to the sexual addiction meeting room. That's just taking exaggeration and extreme literal interpretation to the limit.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 33
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History
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 7:31:38 AM
Although I think the article is flawed (the answer to the question stated in the subject line is obviously "Yes" -- but the article itself goes off on a tangent that doesn't really have much to do with the original question), I actually agree with WIP for once, though there is no way prostitution or rape should be on the table; of course, the fact that nearly are prostitutes (both female and male) serve men and essentially all rapists are men is in and of itself proof that the answer to the original question is still "Yes."

One peculiar thing the article does not go into: women propositioning men. Why is it entirely focused on men propositioning women? ANY man with any kind of game throwing himself at every woman in a room (ANY room) more likely than not will fail -- ask any player or "stud" what his nightly success ratio is. You win some, you lose some. A woman doing the same thing? I guarantee she succeeds 99% of the time. Of course, most women don't do that. But, that's their own fault for not trying like many men do. Just like with POF, when a woman initiates, something is FAR more likelier to happen than when a man initiates.

But back to why I agree with WIP: I haven't been on a date in 4 years and at a number of other times in my life have gone years between dates, yet I'm still quite sure I could probably also get FREE CONSENUAL sex whenever I want. IF I am willing to go deep in the ghetto or some rural meth factory and find a 300 pound 8th-grade dropout with six kids or an 80 pound addict with half of her teeth and half of her brain missing. I doubt I wouldn't find a taker or two. Indeed, as inept as I have been on POF, about once every 3 months I do get a first contact email from a woman... that I almost inevitably find completely repulsive. No doubt if I relentlessly pursued any of those leads, I would be dateless (and sexless) no more.

But after spending most of my early dating years with women that pretty much sickened me, and then spending my most recent with women I was genuinely attracted to, I can't really see myself going back to those early years -- it's not fair to them, and to me, it's actually very close to being worse than being alone. Though four years in, I'm starting to question that. The really sad thing, I suppose, is that I find like 90% of the women I come across in my POF searches and Meet Me's and whatnot attractive, yet pretty much only those from the 10% I don't really want anything to do with ever email me.

Which, I suppose, is what many women of all attractiveness on POF argue. Yet I'd still take their 30 bad emails a day over my one bad email every 3 months! Much better for one's self-esteem...
 colt8301
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 34
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 7:32:29 AM

Women are often seen as having the power to say “yes” or “no” in sexual situations. From the male point of view, if a woman wants to have sex, all she has to do is say “yes” and sex is on.



LOl, that's pretty much the gist of it. A woman I don't care how unattractive, fat, and disgusting she is. If she wants to get laid that very day, it will happen. The only kicker here is can she get laid by who she wants to screw, that's where the work comes in, other than that she can get screwed by somebody at any given time. A man who is deemed unattractive has to work to get laid.....he has to find a way to get "money" to give to the prostitute. And now we are back to the age old question the double standard.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 35
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 7:58:18 AM

We're talking about equal amount of effort here.

Some people are, yes. However the statement "women can get laid whenever they want" doesn't address the effort or amount of ease. It addresses possibility. So if some have to work harder at it, who cares? In the end if they do so they'll still get it when they want it.

If someone means "most women can get laid with less effort than most men" then that's what they should say. From there the discussion can then be about amount of effort (if anyone cares, frankly).

I think the "amount of effort or ease" is implied with the original question.

You're really dissecting this more than it needs to be.

To most men who would say something like this or who think that's the important issue, I'm sure it is inferred. However in the sense of people saying what they mean, it's not a given that it's what is meant. I'm not dissecting so much as taking a question as is without contextual influence.

If women can get laid with less effort than men, what do we then conclude from that outside the fact that men make the dynamic what it is? They could all band together to tip the scales, but since that'll never happen - where do we go from the knowledge of this? Women don't usually find the fact that random men off the street would sleep with us if we asked to be much of a reason to celebrate, so the point is sort of moot.
 JRodriguez81
Joined: 2/24/2010
Msg: 36
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:03:15 AM

Some people are, yes. However the statement "women can get laid whenever they want" doesn't address the effort or amount of ease. It addresses possibility. So if some have to work harder at it, who cares? In the end if they do so they'll still get it when they want it.

If someone means "most women can get laid with less effort than most men" then that's what they should say. From there the discussion can then be about amount of effort (if anyone cares, frankly).



I think the "amount of effort or ease" is implied with the original question.


You're really dissecting this more than it needs to be.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 37
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:07:53 AM

(Capitano Blaugh) .. yup, a guy can get laid any time he's willing to lay out $100-$200-$300 + for a hooker, once.


(WIP) A number of men have argued/complained that they've spent that much getting to know a woman they want to date without seeing sex once.


Right. So, logically, if getting laid is the objective for a guy, he would get the biggest bang for the buck (pun unintentional, but DEFINITELY intended!) if he just skipped the "meet for coffee/date" foo-fer-aw, and just spent his money on an esxcort...

J.P. Arlo...
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 38
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:13:28 AM
Right. So, logically, if getting laid is the objective for a guy, he would get the biggest bang for the buck (pun unintentional, but DEFINITELY intended!) if he just skipped the "meet for coffee/date" foo-fer-aw, and just spent his money on an esxcort...

Without the laughing icon, which loses its meaning after the first 300 times it's added to a post, YES.

If a man is looking for sex only, it would not only be a waste of time and money for him to try and get to know a woman who may want more just for the benefits, it's a much better investment for him to go pay for it. If more men paid for sex only when that's what they really wanted and spent less time trying to wrap it in a faux search for a relationship to get to what they percieve to be "added value", women who want relationships would have an easier time weeding through to find men who want the same - and less men would be harassed by women they told they wanted more than sex from when they didn't follow through. No brainer.
 U make it entertaining
Joined: 7/17/2009
Msg: 39
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:23:57 AM
I'm sure if that was a woman's main priority, then no problem.

Same for men.

You can get what ever you want ... you just have to make it a priority.

With that being said, I prefer BOB.

Too much drama involved with a live person.
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 40
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:31:29 AM

Some people are, yes. However the statement "women can get laid whenever they want" doesn't address the effort or amount of ease. It addresses possibility. So if some have to work harder at it, who cares? In the end if they do so they'll still get it when they want it.

If someone means "most women can get laid with less effort than most men" then that's what they should say. From there the discussion can then be about amount of effort (if anyone cares, frankly).


Effort and ease in this discussion is as relevant as level of attractiveness.

It's no more fair to consider the levels of success with an unattractive gal and an attractive male. They MAY have a similar success rate...but really "apples and oranges".

In the same token...you cannot compare success rate with a passive female (I'll sit here and look beautiful and wait for a guy to come on to me) and an aggressive male. They may have a similar success rate. But...again...apples and oranges.

For an answer to have the least bit of validity...it cannot contain two huge variable. In this case attractiveness and effort.

But...if you level the playing field...equal attractiveness and effort...I think we all know the success rate would be extremely lop sided.

I do agree with your "literal" answer to the "literal" question. But it was an absolute question. The answer is almost always "no" with these kinds of questions.

Can men REALLY get laid whenever they want? Not if their genitals were removed in a car accident and never recovered. REALLY?! Literally!

Edit:

If a man is looking for sex only, it would not only be a waste of time and money for him to try and get to know a woman who may want more just for the benefits, it's a much better investment for him to go pay for it. If more men paid for sex only when that's what they really wanted and spent less time trying to wrap it in a faux search for a relationship to get to what they percieve to be "added value", women who want relationships would have an easier time weeding through to find men who want the same - and less men would be harassed by women they told they wanted more than sex when they didn't follow through. No brainer.


WHOA...
Now we're adding relationship seeking as a further variable in this discussion. The question was about getting laid.....sex only.

Now...the guy is just looking for sex. The gal is looking for a relationship. The guy is putting in extra effort...pulling out all the stops including intimations that he is looking for a relationship.

Does she want to get laid too?

Just trying to keep up


 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 41
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History
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:49:57 AM
People, let's keep this straight.

ANYBODY (except the extremely fugly/or obese/or social inept) can get laid simply ..... BY ACCEPTING WHAT IS OFFERED TO THEM ........

All else is "yeah but's". All other discussion is rationalization of the emotional "yeah, but I WANT that one over there!"

(late teenage, early twenties joke)

Q. How is a Mo-Ped like a fat chick?

A. Lot's of fun to ride, but no one wants his buddies to find out about it.

Anyone can get laid, simply by accepting what's available to them.

BTW, I'm seen beautiful women crying because they couldn't find a lover (they wanted as a lover).
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 42
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:53:23 AM
^^^Exactly.

WHOA...
Now we're adding relationship seeking as a further variable in this discussion. The question was about getting laid.....sex only.

"We" aren't doing anything. "I" was responding to a poster who made a comment about something. The main topic is still what it is.

Now...the guy is just looking for sex. The gal is looking for a relationship. The guy is putting in extra effort...pulling out all the stops including intimations that he is looking for a relationship.

Does she want to get laid too? Just trying to keep up

How should I know? I'm sure she would under certain circumstances. If they sleep together - then yes, he got what he wanted, if that's what you're asking. Did she? Does that matter if he attains the goal to get laid? Only she knows that.
 majyk1
Joined: 4/26/2009
Msg: 43
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 8:54:53 AM
I'm going to have to agree with all those that used the 'number system'.
Over all the answer is YES. We'd just have to lower our standards for a few
minutes...Oh I mean hours. lol
There's always a nickle looking for a dime somewhere!
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 44
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 9:11:39 AM

How should I know?

Because it was the subject of the thread that she wanted to.



I'm sure she would under certain circumstances. If they sleep together - then yes, he got what he wanted, if that's what you're asking. Did she? Does that matter if he attains the goal to get laid? Only she knows that.


I'm really not sure where to go with this one. If THEY sleep together...then the guy got what he wants...and only what he wanted...and for the gal...only she knows what her intent was?

This insinuates that men use manipulations to gain sex...and women us sex to gain manipulations...as a rule. Very risky...especially given the history of these forums.

The whole premise of this entire thread is that the women JUST wants to get laid. And can she whenever she wants to.

This thread has somehow spun this simple question in obscure circles with unending bifurcations.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 46
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 9:47:22 AM

I'm really not sure where to go with this one. If THEY sleep together...then the guy got what he wants...and only what he wanted...and for the gal...only she knows what her intent was?

This insinuates that men use manipulations to gain sex...and women us sex to gain manipulations...as a rule. Very risky...especially given the history of these forums.

The whole premise of this entire thread is that the women JUST wants to get laid. And can she whenever she wants to.

This thread has somehow spun this simple question in obscure circles with unending bifurcations.

Again, this all stems from my response to a post that was an aside to the actual topic. So in that context, if she only wanted sex and no relationship, then naturally the score would be 1-1. Sure, to some extent women don't tend to seek out sex for the sake of it and if they did they'd get laid more. However just because it's easier for a woman to have sex it doesn't mean men aren't capable of or unable to do the same. Many men for instance don't want to pay for sex as they feel it's impersonal. If sex is the goal who cares how personal it is? Many won't sleep with any girl who'll have them. Because men don't want to do this doesn't mean they don't have the option.

I do feel that more men could have sex but don't, and less women can find sex on demand than men believe, but overall if someone wants sex and within legal boundaries makes the effort required if there is one to have sex with another person, then they can in fact achieve it.
 DallasSBF
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 47
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 10:11:52 AM

A guy is subject to the female veto power.


Since most of the time men make the first move. There in lies the veto power. She is too fat. She is too skinny. She is plain. She is old. She is black. She is ________ (fill in the blank for whatever reason you will not approach a woman). Then YOU have vetoed that woman's yes. And she just may have said yes. So if you guys wanted to get laid. Start with the 2's at 10 o clock rather than being with rejected by the 10 until nothing is left but the 2.
 DallasSBF
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 48
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 10:17:33 AM
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/37710334/ns/health-diet_and_nutrition/

Pretty much kills that theory of women having an easier time of getting laid then men. NEXT.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 49
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 10:55:13 AM

(waywardwynde) But, you see, most everyone (man or woman) wants someone better looking -- on a 0 to 10 scale -- than they are. A 3 wants a 5, who wants a 7, who wants a 9, who wants a 10 ... and precious few 10's exist. *IF* a 5 would take a 3, s/he'd get laid. But, noooooooo .....

When a 5 guy tells a 7 woman that "she can get laid anytime she wants" he means HE would lay her anytime she wants. When a 7 guy tells a 3 women "she can get laid anytime she wants", he MEANS some 5 (but not him) guy SHOULD be available to her BECAUSE no 7+ woman wants a 5 or less guy.


Your system breaks down in the higher ranges. What happens to a 9? A 10? Who do THEY go after? Or, do they turn into fruit, like this:


People want the fruit on the tree which is higher than they themselves are on the tree. If people are willing to pick the fruit at waist to knee level, they get a grateful piece of fruit.


This is very confusing...

Arlo...
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 50
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 11:08:21 AM

(revilors) This insinuates that men use manipulations to gain sex...


Not to put myself into the "Slam Guys in the Hopes of Scoring!" camp, but...

GEE, YA THINK?!?

Arlo...
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 51
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 11:17:39 AM
Plus one of most males double standards is the a guy can have sex with 10 women and be a hero but if a woman sleeps with 10 men she is a slut. That is common knowledge by most men and women. Sad but true. So keeping that double standard in mind that could be another reason women don't "sleep around" because when they are ready for a s/o they don't want that "skeleton in the closet" Just a thought


This is true, too, in some cases. However, not the case for me. If I want to sleep around, then I'll sleep around. Double standard or not, and what woman would follow that double standard? This is 2011.


Ladies, do you know how powerful you really are?


What kind of power is that? Men aren't the only one's that have to prove themselves to the opposite sex. Women have to work to improve our chances as well. There is no red carpet laid out for us, and many us don't have the opposite sex eating out of the palm of our hands.
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 52
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 11:25:35 AM

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/37710334/ns/health-diet_and_nutrition/

Pretty much kills that theory of women having an easier time of getting laid then men. NEXT.


This article has no bearing on the subject of this thread. Unless I can't read...it didn't ask if obese women could get laid whenever they wanted. It didn't ask if obese women had a harder time getting laid than skinny women.

It only states that...in Europe...obese woman have a more difficult time than obese men. And...in Europe...woman seem to tolerate the extra weight than men.


and less women can find sex on demand than men believe


Perhaps for some men. At least those that believe the subject of this thread. I really don't believe men (at least this one) believes that (all) women get laid whenever they want. Statements like that aren't intended to be taken literally.

It's called a hyperbole.

"I'm so tired...I could sleep for a year". "No you couldn't...you'd starve to death or get septic shock from bed sores and die."

"I'm so hungry...I could eat a horse". "No you couldn't...given your relative body mass and gastric capacity...it's impossible.

Come on
 worknovertime
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 53
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 11:48:29 AM
Many of the statements here are operating from the premise that woman want sex in the same way/manner/frequency/etc as men.

For example... the earlier statement that given the same level of attractiveness... the woman in a social setting has the advantage. (At getting sex on demand.. I guess)

OK... that is assuming that women would want sex in that same manner as men.

Let's change the sentence....

Given the same level of attractiveness... the man in a social setting has the advantage. (At getting a relationship started).

Simple...

I want a man who is offering respect, consideration, a commitment ..... not causal sex.

If he is offering casual sex... not commitment, consideration, respect.

then each could be perceived by the other as having the advantage.

Men are just a lot more willing to leap into bed without looking first.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 54
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History
Can women REALLY get laid whenever they want?
Posted: 1/8/2011 12:08:44 PM

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/37710334/ns/health-diet_and_nutrition/

Pretty much kills that theory of women having an easier time of getting laid then men. NEXT.

the headline on this story misrepresents the findings of the study.

the study made no comparison of the success rates of men vs. women in finding a sexual partner. it only made comparisons within genders: fat women have less success than women who aren't fat. fat men have the same success as men who aren't fat.
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