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 Iseedudpeople
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 87
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his WordPage 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

He sometimes explained why he couldn't call, but they were usually reasons like Oh, I was with friends, I didn't bring my phone, basically, he was doing other things that were more important.



I was involved with a woman like this and I let it slide initially because I was so smitten. But , then I wondered if she was either playing games or just not that into me.

It reminded me of the saying " don't make someone a priority who only makes you an option "

Like you, I finally got angry - I was actually hurt and disappointed that she didn't reciprocate my feelings.

Of course, I was made out to be the " bad guy " because I lost my cool.....

Live and learn, all you can do
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 88
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/24/2013 10:09:58 AM

How many chances do you guys give people?

TOTALLY depends on what the situation is and what it's about. Way too vague to say "How many chances?"

Big difference between saying they'll show up for a date and don't show, but hours later say "OH, yeah, I've been busy doing this and that. Call me next week and we'll arrange something," VS someone being busy and apologizing by not calling around the time they say they would. One strike and you're out in the first situation, of course. The second situation, depends on the sincerity, but yeah, you at least give them another chance.

"OH, yeah, I told you wouldn't have sex with my ex. I promise I won't do it again!" -- How many "chances" do you give him? NONE!

"OH, I know I told you me and my friends would meet up with you and your friends here at 9, and it's 9:30, I'm sorry, Bob was pining over his breakup and other stuff... but here, I'll make it up to you..." -- How many "chances" before you break up with the BF because of that? Whoah, Easy! Sure you even like the guy? ;)
 quinnperkins
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 89
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/24/2013 6:51:57 PM
i have male friends and the first thing they would say if you were to tell them this story would be the dude sensed your desperation, and if it was me i would say bs, look i think twice should be good enough, because after the second time that proves to you he has no respect or interest in you and you need to cut that zero and move on....i have had that happened to me with a guy and i noticed that everytime he made plans to go out with me he always had to cancel because something would always come up...it never fail...honey save your self the headache an let him stay at the curb.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 90
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/25/2013 4:03:14 AM
This thread is almost three years old. I don't know why somebody dug it up. It has nothing to do with my life and the man in it, today.
 dpwesu
Joined: 3/25/2013
Msg: 91
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/25/2013 5:04:31 PM
while this thread me an "older thread".......

this is a subject that is very timeless and very very relevant. .......

I don't give a lot of chances to those who can't keep their word.

and these days.....there are sooo many who don't.
 WeeDeeter
Joined: 7/2/2013
Msg: 92
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/26/2013 1:09:45 AM
Once is an accident
Twice is a coincedence
Three times is deliberate

You know chit can happen. A phone loses it's charge...he had to work late...whatever. But you seem to be an option to this guy. I'm more concerned between the incongruence between his stated intentions ( he says he very into you and the phone calls are very intense) and his actions (he's not treating you like you are important to him) Personally it's a huge red flag for me. It's called love bombing which is followed by a discard....it's a tactic employed by disordered individuals to groom you for ongoing emotional abuse. I would facking RUN!

Turn OFF the volume on this guy. Imagine for a moment he can't talk. Forget everything he's SAID. Stand back and take stock of what he's done. Has he SHOWN you that he is in to you? (or just told you)

One thing is true about men...they rarely deny themselves something they want. (yeh yeh whatever to all the indignant men!) If he wanted you...NOTHING could keep him away from you.

I think you've saved yourself a lot of grief by putting the run him. Move on.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 93
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/26/2013 1:11:52 AM
I did. I moved on three years ago.
 WeeDeeter
Joined: 7/2/2013
Msg: 94
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 10/26/2013 1:13:46 AM
Right on! You made the right decision then! :D
 Buterfly1978
Joined: 11/3/2013
Msg: 95
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/11/2013 5:07:07 PM

Once is an accident
Twice is a coincedence
Three times is deliberate


Actions speak louder than words...

Words are easy to speak, but following up with the same actions is a little harder.
 aanarchist
Joined: 8/23/2013
Msg: 96
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/12/2013 1:17:12 AM
i avoid giving my word because i don't want to be held responsible or accountable for things i don't want to be held responsible or accountable for. that being said, if i say i will do something i do it, if you're still dating "men" who don't, then you may wanna read some self help books and grow the f up you child.

if i don't do something and i said i would then chances are i forgot because i'm pretty absentminded, and my special lady will know better than to bullshit me with crap like keeping my word, just remind me and problem solved i always put time into things that are important.
 rosewood_girl
Joined: 10/30/2013
Msg: 97
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/12/2013 1:39:33 AM
Usually about 3 times, and then I would be honest and let them know that what they are doing is bothering me. If they can't get that or try to fix it, then I'm done. He can sit there and act like you are the bad guy, but you have every right to be pissed.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 98
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/12/2013 4:13:12 PM
1 chance. NUFF SAID!
 curlygrl
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 99
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/12/2013 4:25:28 PM
This thread is three years old......

Miss LiliMarleen caught her a nice fishie.

Congrats beautiful.

I am sure this thread has some meaning but not in her current status.

You can all let it go now.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 100
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/12/2013 4:27:46 PM
I've tried to let it go, but this thread has "static cling"...........
 quwalloo
Joined: 8/21/2013
Msg: 101
How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/20/2013 12:52:47 PM
Three strikes and your out!!!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 102
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How Many Chances if a Man Doesn't Keep his Word
Posted: 11/24/2013 10:53:03 AM
If a person would say s/he will call me or attend my party , and they won't call it doesn't bother me at all.
I will chuck that s/he is not interested with me, and I won't be interested with her/him too, it is as simple as that..
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