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 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 58
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?Page 3 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

LOL....... people have some strange misconceptions about this...like having a threesomes or being open means your lovemaking won't be intense! ...or that it somehow means one party isn't satisfied with the relationship... nothing could be further from the truth...loving and trusting your partner enough to share them can make for some very intense lovemaking and overall feelings....share each other then experience very deep and intense passion like being newly in love all over again! .....it lasts for months.



For YOU that might be true, for ME, i feel it would diminish it.
NOWHERE did i judge anyone who does choose to have 3 somes.
I would only want to sleep with another man if i wasnt satisfied in my relationship, abnd i like things one on one. We can experience passion and falling newly in love again without third parties. if we get to the point wjhere we cant, then it will be time to move on.
And thats just me, if the person next to me feels completely different, good for them. Im not going to try and change them and they sure as hell arent going to change me.


No matter how good a cook one is, its still nice to go out to eat once in awhile


I have a great cook (my bf actually is a professional chef), whose dishes and reciped make me want to stay in!


You guys crack me up! It's like listening to someone who has only walked trying to tell someone else what driving or flying is like....or trying to describe snow having never seen it in person!
Have you ever talked with someone who has never seen snow? If you get the chance...ask them to tell you what they THINK it feels like..... it'll crack you up!



I dont have to touch a hot stove, or get run over by a tractor, or poke myself in the eyes with a hot poker, to know i wouldnt enjoy those things. I see a 3some in the same way.


Seeing your love pleasured in ways that they've only been able to experience because of you is very rewarding.
No matter how good of a lover you are, giving them freedom to experience others only brings them to appreciate you more...in fact it let's them experience others that they would not let themselves experience if they were single.... its hard to explain, but the situation allows for more trust and security in experimenting than being single does.....for women, more so than men.


In YOUR opinion. If you like them, awesome for you. I like things too that others might not like. Its all good. You do you, i will do me, other people will do them.
Im not dumb or closedminded or unable to enjoy sex b/c it isnt something that appeals to me. You dont us asking whats wrong with you that you cant enjoy sex with one person?!!?
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 59
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/10/2011 1:31:28 PM

^^^I would not have any interest in anything more then him and I. I don't care what others do and I don't judge anyone, but it is not for me.

I'm "greedy" when it comes to intimacy, and do not share well with others.



This about sums it up for me as well. No way I am sharing my man with another woman and I have absolutely no interest in sex with any one but him.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 60
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/10/2011 3:26:31 PM
Okay, nowhere am I suggesting everyone go try something they don't have an interest in, nor do I suggest that there's something wrong with people who don't do something....what I take issue with is when people who aren't interested in something:
1.Make negative statements about the act IMPLYING that those that partake are_____!(Fill in the blank,).
2. State as FACT distortions or stereotypes about the act or those that partake.
3. Repeat misleading information about the act to back up their point of why it should NOT be done...not just by them but by anyone!

Like I said, if something isn't for you then don't do it!


blueceleste..Yes when I say poly I mean Polyamory. ...I just can't grasp the concept. I'm too possessive and insecure to share my woman's HEART. I am in an OPEN relationship though....I have no problem sharing her BODY if it makes her feel good. She rarely does it, but when she does, she does it in a way that lets me know she loves ME and appreciates the sexual freedom. If she wasn't like that I wouldn't be okay with it....as it is it turns me on! A past GF did it differently and I started to HATE it.

I just don't think I could share her heart....but I give kudos to those that can/do.

I have my own misconceptions about Poly that I keep to myself because, especially after reading a few threads and articles, realize that it's my own fears and imagination creating those thoughts.



I dont have to touch a hot stove, or get run over by a tractor, or poke myself in the eyes with a hot poker, to know i wouldnt enjoy those things. I see a 3some in the same way.


You're SERIOUSLY missing the point here!
You don't have to experience something to know you don't want to do it....what I'm referring to is people describing how something FEELS or the DYNAMICS of something that they no experience with! Like saying having a 3some, open relationship or FWB is devoid of emotion and love (which ALL has been said in these forums.) when the people making the statements have no experience to make those statements.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 61
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/10/2011 8:29:59 PM

what I'm referring to is people describing how something FEELS or the DYNAMICS of something that they no experience with

Once again......of course they can. One doesn't have to actually have a 3some to know how it would make them feel. If they already know in their mind that seeing their SO
have sex with another person is too much for them to handle.......why do you think they actually have to experience it to enforce those feelings?

I know I could not handle an Open Relationship. There is no way in hell my mind or heart could handle my SO out getting laid by someone else. I don't have to let him
go screw another woman to know how I FEEL about it.

I agree, noone should be telling someone else what they should do or don't do.....
or labeling them in negative ways to prove their point.
But..........it is human nature for people to project how they would feel.....onto others.
I've done it.......you've done it......we've all done it at one point or another here.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 62
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/10/2011 9:20:07 PM
^^^^^^ OKAY, AGAIN I'm not talking about when they say how they think it WOULD feel to them or how they feel about it....I'm talking about the people who say it's devoid of love, intensity etc. as if they KNOW how it ACTUALLY feels. If you think it would feel that way to you then fine, don't do it...just don't suggest that is how it WILL feel, DOES feel or HAS to feel.... Especially to those who say that their SO must not love them if they want this.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 63
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/10/2011 9:37:10 PM

If you think it would feel that way to you then fine, don't do it...just don't suggest that is how it WILL feel, DOES feel or HAS to feel.... Especially to those who say that their SO must not love them if they want this.

oh c'mon JCO.......you know darn well if someone already knows in their heart that
seeing their SO with another person sexually is something they can't handle.....actually doing the act is not going to change that opinion. So it IS how the person FEELS.....whether they have a 3some or not.

as for some thinking their SO must not love them if they want another person in their bed..........those are valid "feelings" for many people. Far more have that opinion than those that think differently. For the largest percentage of people out there, love and sex are one and the same......and you will never convince them otherwise because that is what is in their heart. Your perception of love is yours. It is not right or wrong.
It is just different than most other's perception of love.
It is not for you to say someone's would "feel" differently by just trying something
they already know they cannot emotionally handle.
 cherryyblossom
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 64
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 5:59:44 AM
i wonder if Maxim is right about people liking threesomes more.
 howard19651
Joined: 2/5/2011
Msg: 66
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:32:12 AM
I have always wanted to have a MFF threesome. be seeing you.
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 67
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:58:19 AM
Try it you will like it ...lol. it didn't work with spinach ...and it won't work with threesomes we all pretty much know what our sexual limits are without trying everything under the sun .. we all are different people and are different people at different stages in our life ..when I was younger I did threesomes as well as other kinks ..but always with people I didn't care about ... then I found someone I loved ...deep inside I knew I didn't want to share or be shared by the one I loved ...several years and a few heartaches down the road ..another lover and another level of intimacy.. having multi partners with the one I loved became an option ...and then it became an reality .. and still further down life's path we both got that all out of our system ...and what remained was a deeper love ..I would never recommend that lifestyle for anyone ... who didn't have the desire to do it ...BUT we did and it didn't destroy our relationship ..It brought on a new kind of trust ... a trust where she and I know that when we say we don't want anyone else ..there is no doubt in the others mind that it is the truth ..for we both know that if either of us wanted something different we would express it openly
There is two distinct mind sets on this ..one where a person cannot bare the thought of her lovers body being touched by another ..and one where seeing /knowing their lover is being pleasured even by another brings on an ecstatic high ... both are definitions of love ...and both may be possessed by the same people at different stages in their life

But for anyone to condemn the other mind set/lifestyle as good or bad is wrong ..either may be whats right for you at this point in your life .. People who want to try alternative lifestyles with their partners who either don't or are apprehensive ... have two choices either accept and wait to see if it changes..or move on to someone who has like feelings ...to pressure someone else into these things is wrong as well as the recipe for a painful end to the relationship ..any discussion of these things other than mentioning that you would be open for such .is undue pressure ...this comes form an old man who has come full circle in his sexual life ..doing most things wrong the first time...but still arriving at a happy conclusion
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 68
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 8:56:31 AM

oh c'mon JCO.......you know darn well if someone already knows in their heart that seeing their SO with another person sexually is something they can't handle.....actually doing the act is not going to change that opinion.

Actually, I think jco is right about not knowing unless one tries it. I know how I think I would feel about an mfm threesome with my fiancee. I haven't done it, so I don't know that for sure. Prior to meeting my fiancee, I would have done an mfm threesome had the opportunity come up. As jco said, I really wouldn't know if I would like it or not without trying it and while I was single, all I was risking was fnding out whether or not I would like it. I can't see how that could be a big deal for anyone. However, the reason I'm not willing to find out now is because there's more at stake. A threesome would involve my fiancee and once it's done, it's something I can't undo.

The decision is between taking the risk that I might like it versus the risk it might create for my relationship. The decision is one that involves weighing various risks. For better or worse, that risk to my relationship is certainly due to my and my fiancee's underlying feelings about sex and relationship, but it's something that I don't really feel the need to change at this time. I wouldn't mind be less hung up about that sort of thing, but I'm not curious enough to find out whether or not I'd like it to accept the consequences of finding out.
 Butterfly~Effect
Joined: 12/12/2008
Msg: 69
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 9:28:57 AM

This question is for everyone. How would you feel if your partner (spouse or serious relationship) told you they were interested in a threesome either mfm or ffm? Would you be interested in doing one? Why or why not? Should make for an interesting discussion :-)


There would be no discussion regarding it...as he would know before he became my partner that this wasn't my thing.

If he brought it up after knowing how I felt...then this would be an easy answer for me....I would show him the door and say 'ciao Bello'...
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 70
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 10:03:33 AM

Actually, I think jco is right about not knowing unless one tries it. I know how I think I would feel about an mfm threesome with my fiancee. I haven't done it, so I don't know that for sure. Prior to meeting my fiancee, I would have done an mfm threesome had the opportunity come up.

But you have to admit.....you have a different mindset since you have been open to the idea in the past. You were willing to do it without "love" being involved.
Now that you are in love......you are looking passed the "sex" and weighing the concequences to the relationship.
For those that have never considered a 3some to be a fun idea.....in or out of a relationship......they do already know how they feel about the idea.
If someone knows in their heart they do not want to share their partner sexually.....doing the deed isn't going to change how the feel about it emotionally.
Hell, some people can't handle their SO dancing with another person of the opposite sex......do you really think these "types" are going to have a 3some and suddenly "Feel"
differently?
 howard19651
Joined: 2/5/2011
Msg: 71
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 10:37:58 AM
If it feels right for all 3 parties involved,go for it. There is nothing wrong with consenting adults exploring their sexuality with other consenting adults. be seeing you.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 72
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 11:06:35 AM

For those that have never considered a 3some to be a fun idea.....in or out of a relationship......they do already know how they feel about the idea.

For most people, I would admit that there's no practical distinction between ``knowing'' they wouldn't like something and discovering they wouldn't like something if they tried it. However, there is a real difference and that is question ones reasons for why he/she thinks as he/she does. There are many attitudes about a lot of things tht were ingrained into me by my parents when I was young and that I would still hold had I not asked muyself a lot of difficult questions about why I think as I do and found that logic didn't fit very well with some of those ingrained beliefs. Some of them still don't, but at least I understand why I make the choices I make and in most cases, it boils down to thinking that the effort to change the way I feel about something doesn't really affect anything important enough to make the effort.

An example would be the canonical question about the number of sexual partners. My parents were the living embodiment of leave it to beaverville. Sex before marriage was just not something they would even talk about wihout getting a little irritated. So, between my desire to have sex when I was a teen and the attitude I grew up with about virginity, I started out holding that double standard that I find so hypocritical. Because I believe in equality, I knew it was hypocritical, but without forcing myself to get over that attitude, I would still have that hangup. Dating an escort for a month really put any remaining hangup I might have had to rest once and for all. (Given the fact that an escort has pretty much seen it all, that also dealt the last blow to whatever other insecurities I might have still had about the other perennial topics guys post about here, like penis size.)

Aside from the hypocrisy, there were also practical consequences in that finding a virgin at my age would be pretty difficult and probably not very sexually rewarding.

So, although I have no issue with people who find the idea of a threesome to be repugnant for some reason and do not wish to experience it, I do agree with jco's assessment that they really can't know what the experience is like without doing it. Most pepople have never really looked deep down to understand why the idea bothers them so much. JCO's lifestyle would not work for me, but I give him a lot of credit for overcoming hangups that I think the rest of us would be better off without.

But you have to admit.....you have a different mindset since you have been open to the idea in the past. You were willing to do it without "love" being involved.
Now that you are in love......you are looking passed the "sex" and weighing the concequences to the relationship.

Actually, my mindset about an mfm threesome hasn't changed. I really would have no security issues with respect to the way my fiancee feels about me nor would I be intimidated in any way by a third party. I still think it would be fun to do one, but there are two things that keep from doing it. (1) Despite knowing that there is no logical reason that ought to stop me from going through with it, I really can't predict how I'd feel about it. Since it's something I cannot undo, it's not worth the risk for whatever thrill I might get from it; (2) My fiancee would never consider it. We've talked about our various likes and dislikes quite a bit and she has stated flat out that she just has no interest in doing an mfm threesome.

On the other hand, I would still have no problem with an ffm threesome, although I wouldn't consider the fmf version. I've dated a woman who was bi and I had no problem with her seeing a woman without me being around, so if my fiancee was interested in women, that would be fine. I wouldn't do the fmf, simply because I'd be expecting my fiancee to be ok with something I wouldn't be ok with if the situation was reversed.

Hell, some people can't handle their SO dancing with another person of the opposite sex......do you really think these "types" are going to have a 3some and suddenly "Feel"
differently?

Not really, but I think there is a subtle distinction between assuming you won't like something and making a decision to not do something after first questioning your reasons for feeling a certain way about something.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 73
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 11:13:08 AM
See, before I ever did a MFM threesome I was against them, tried one one and didn't like it...It felt empty and I felt like we used the poor girl.

THEN I was with a GF who WANTED to feel used by two men, said it was her fantasy...I reluctantly tried again. This time it was different DESPITE already "KNOWING" how I'd feel! The difference was that I loved her and wanted to please her. It made me feel GOOD to have given hear something that she'd fantasized about yet only trusted me to listen and set it up.

During the MFM it was all pure sex...no love or passion... it was AFTER, when we were alone again that the love and passion occurred....after he left we switched gears, slowed down and made love. I had NO IDEA it would feel that good to have given her that UNTIL I did it!

NOW I know that MFM with no love is not my thing, but MFM WITH love IS my thing!
....actually what I really discovered is that although not very kinky by nature myself, I tend to get into whatever my SO is into...and enjoy giving them what they've been denied..

I now know that if I love someone, I will love their kink with them.

It's only having EXPERIENCED this that I figured this out!


Vanilla example: I absolutely HATE cooking! I don't cook, don't want to cook can't stand when I have to cook....I won't even grille! BUT with my current GF, I wanted to surprise her one night so I cooked an entire meal for her, she was very happy and surprised...and loved the meal! I still hate cooking, but I totally enjoyed cooking in the moment when it was for her! And I will enjoy cooking for her again!
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 74
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 3:32:33 PM
yeah.......cooking is a good example

JCO.....even you personal experiences aren't good examples.......because you have a different mindset about "love".

For those that cannot disconnect sex from love.....trying it isn't going to change how the feel about it.

You can go on and on about your experiences and how you've "grown" is your sexual explorations...........and it doesn't mean jackchit to someone who has absolutely no desire to see their loved one having sex with someone else....or has no desire to be with anyone but the person they are in love with.
You have a penchant for making it sound like we don't know our own minds.
That is my whole point.

and remember, I have participated in MFM and FMF 3somes and had a FWB for years.....so while I understand the ability to disconnect sex and love.......I don't expect
others to think if they just try it they would know how it really "FEELS" to do the same.
I do hope that others will respect that I know my own mind and know what is right or wrong for ME. But what is right for me.......has no bearing on what is right for them.

You are in an "open" relationship......I already know how I "Feel" about it.
And you cannot tell me that I don't know how I "Feel" about it........no more than you can tell someone how they "Feel" about 3somes.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 75
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 4:22:42 PM
^^^^ Thank you, you actually just helped me make my point! Just as How I feel about something may differ from how someone else feels about something doesn't give me the right to say that's how it will feel for everyone.... My whole point was directed at the people who had no experience trying to tell everyone how it WILL feel!

I was laughing at the inexperienced people telling how something feels! ....That's all I was doing...

Later the convo morphed into you don't REALLY know how you'd feel unless you tried.....which is also very true!

...You are correct, that I can and DO separate sex and love....I wasn't ALWAYS like that!

It wasn't until I experienced casual sex with someone I loved that I saw the difference.... I was much more vanilla than everyone here... UNTIL I allowed myself to experience non-vanilla stuff.


So point #1.....it's FUNNY to hear people describe something they haven't actually done!

#2. You don't REALLY know how you'll feel about something UNTIL you actually do it!....You can only ASSUME you'll know and you can only really say how you THINK you'll feel!


Msmicki.... you of all people should understand my point since you've been involved with many FWB threads where people would come in and try to say that FWB felt empty, no love, no passion and that someone is always using another in them. Then it turns out those people never even had a FWB....they were projecting... and you didn't like it.

Now the subject is threesomes and the same "feels empty, no love, no passion and that someone is always using another in them." BS is being cast about. .....Most of it without merit.

And I just love how people say their response to their loved one would be to cast them out in the cold and be done with them upon mere sugestion of a threesome.....REALLY? You must REALLY love that person....to be able to be done with them for trusting you enough to open up their secrets and curiosities to you.....great way to treat someone you supposedly love!

I never suggested that anyone participate in stuff that makes them uncomfortable either. I have said that if you love someone you should be able to discuss matters without judgment....and if it's something that they are strongly pulled to do, at least CONSIDER allowing them to explore it without you in a safe manner.

However I also think that if one has a proclivity they should just be open about it upfront so they don't get in this mess in the first place!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 76
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 5:59:17 PM
And I just love how people say their response to their loved one would be to cast them out in the cold and be done with them upon mere sugestion of a threesome.....REALLY? You must REALLY love that person....to be able to be done with them for trusting you enough to open up their secrets and curiosities to you.....great way to treat someone you supposedly love!

I have to agree with you. I read those types of responses and I most generally think, "Now there's a real bond between two people. Or SO not!" Unfortunately? All too often in (yes, I'm going to use the term) "vanilla" relationships, it's taboo to tell you inner-most wants/fantasies. I was one of those people and it ruined any/all sexual attraction/desire I had for my then-husband. I felt like my thoughts were dirty, twisted, too kinky to speak about, etc., and so I said nothing. Our sex life bored the HELL out of me, but I was afraid to tell him the truth, for the reason stated here. I was so fearful his ego would be bruised or that he'd think my mind was corrupt, etc., that I suffered years of sleeper-sex. I will never, ever, again in this lifetime ~ live like that. If I can't openly talk about wants/needs/desires/kinks/fetishes/wills/wonts/would like to try with the man in my life ~ he's not the right man for me, and if he isn't OK doing the same in reverse? I'm not the woman for him. I don't think "love" enters the minds of those who would leave at the mere thought ~ that's simply a closed-mind hearing something it doesn't wish to hear. Which is fine, but that doesn't speak of "loving someone" to me. JMO
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 77
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:15:49 PM
^^^^^ and to those people who say their SO would NEVER bring this subject up.....You're probably right.....but don't fool yourself into believing that just because you've temporarily intimidated them into not expressing it doesn't mean they may not be thinking it!


The point is that people should only be with people that they can express themselves with.
Not necessarily carry out all the deeds, but be able to express their fantasies without fear of judgment! You can't possibly LOVE someone if you're making them stifle part of themselves.... you're being selfish by only allowing them to express the parts of their being that compliment you. Now if someone all of a sudden decides they want something way out there that they cant live without and you can't live with....fine a split is in order.... you're obviously not compatible after all. BUT to shut someone out just for expressing a possible desire is not LOVING. Heck, at least talk about it and get down to the core of why it interests them....perhaps the main feeling could be satisfied by occasional dirty talk or role play!
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 78
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How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:44:54 PM

^^^^^ and to those people who say their SO would NEVER bring this subject up.....You're probably right.....but don't fool yourself into believing that just because you've temporarily intimidated them into not expressing it doesn't mean they may not be thinking it!


Or maybe we know our SO has the same views on it as we do. ^^^Not every one or should I say not every man, lol has a secret desire to have a threesome.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 79
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:51:46 PM
Or maybe we know our SO has the same views on it as we do. ^^^Not every one or should I say not every man, lol has a secret desire to have a threesome.

The comments above are NOT singular to threesomes ~ the context is that any/all sexual thoughts/desires/fantasies/etc/etc. Not everyone has an interest in threesomes. I've never had an interest in having a threesome of any nature ~ doesn't mean I don't have alllll sorts of other thoughts that I should feel 100% comfortable sharing with the man in my life. If I can't share those, not act on them, speak of them/converse about them. there is a serious "core" disconnect in that relationship.

(And we NEVER "know" for sure the mind/thoughts of another ~ we "know" what we are told. Hopefully it's the honest truth, hopefully if those thoughts change or evolve, we are open to learning of the changes. Your SO may not like yogurt today ~ he might love it tomorrow. He'd need to communicate that to you, and you'd need to hear what he's saying. That's the point of what's being stated above.) JMO
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 80
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History
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 6:58:52 PM
The comments above are NOT singular to threesomes ~ the context is that any/all sexual thoughts/desires/fantasies/etc/etc. Not everyone has an interest in threesomes. I've never had an interest in having a threesome of any nature ~ doesn't mean I don't have alllll sorts of other thoughts that I should feel 100% comfortable sharing with the man in my life. If I can't share those, not act on them, speak of them/converse about them. there is a serious core-issue in that relationship.



Yes, you should be able to express your desires with your SO. Before we even became intimate we talked about our likes and dislikes sexually. However, there are a few people on this thread who think all men want a threesome whether they openly express it or not. Most of one posters comments seemed to be referring to people who do not want to experience a threesome as msmicki said not knowing their own mind.


msmickiYou can go on and on about your experiences and how you've "grown" is your sexual explorations...........and it doesn't mean jackchit to someone who has absolutely no desire to see their loved one having sex with someone else....or has no desire to be with anyone but the person they are in love with.
You have a penchant for making it sound like we don't know our own minds.
That is my whole point.


(And we NEVER "know" for sure the mind/thoughts of another ~ we "know" what we are told. Hopefully it's the honest truth, hopefully if those thoughts change or evolve, we are open to learning of the changes.


Yes!
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 81
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 7:24:45 PM
The comments above are NOT singular to threesomes


True, that's why I just used the word "proclivities".

I was a guy who never WANTED a threesome... I still DON'T... BUT if my girl wanted them I would do them, having enjoyed them in the past when loving a girl who was into it.

You're right that you only know what your SO lets you know... Hell I was married for 18 years....we NEVER fought! WHY? because I knew just what to THINK and SAY that was "CORRECT".... that's no way to live!




VVVV REALLY? At the mere SUGGESTION? WOW! That's no way to live, If I felt that judged all the time I would leave! I'm sorry you can't express yourself in your relationship....that sucks!VVVVVVVV
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 82
view profile
History
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/11/2011 7:31:22 PM
I was a guy who never WANTED a threesome... I still DON'T... BUT if my girl wanted them I would do them, having enjoyed them in the past when loving a girl who was into it.



I'm pretty sure if I was to suggest a threesome which I have no desire to do my SO would be gone too. It's not about not loving some one it's about finding out you are not compatible sexually. I would hope most people know their SO well enough they would not be shocked by sharing their wants and desires.


Everyone has their deal breakers... To you, it may not be a big deal to give or get a suggestion of it, particularly since you're currently pre-disposed towards it...
To someone else, they might simply take that the suggestion of such a thing means that the other person doesn't love them... I've know n women over my life that I have no doubt really loved me but they still would have kicked my ass to the curb if I'd suggested a threesome... and to be honest, that's entirely their right to do so...
If a woman I was seriously involved with made a suggestion like that, I'd probably kick her ass to the curb too...
 3prong
Joined: 1/3/2010
Msg: 83
How do you feel about mfm and/or ffm threesomes?
Posted: 2/13/2011 10:41:21 PM
I don't know if I'd be secure enough to bring another girl in the bedroom. I'd worry that my man likes things about her above me. If I look at it logically it really doesn't make much sense. We are both pretty experienced so know whats out there and have decide we want to be with each other over anyone else. Also, we have both engaged in casual sex so are both very aware that there is such a thing as sex without attachment.

I haven't really participated in a threesome but my guy has in the past. He's had mixed experiences with them and he'd probably really like bringing in another woman but doesn't see himself feeling comfortable bringing in another man (which I wouldn't mind trying).

I think we'll likely just keep this door closed but not locked. He's tried it so it's not like this is something he's always wanted to try, and for me I'm mostly interested because that dp idea looks interesting but we can work around that. A situation could come up that maybe we'd explore but otherwise it's not something we'll be seeking out.

Btw, I'm generally on this forum with my guy in the same room as me and like discussing these topics with him. This has been excellent for us learning more about each other (we have only been together 7 months) so thanks everybody for such interesting threads.
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