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 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 18
Is online dating my thing?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
As for abelain, you can reason it any way you so desire, the bottom line does not change. People can believe what ever they want to, the reality is, you chances are slim. And I will repeat, the majority of guys will disagree with you. Now why is that?


I would like to see where these numbers and statistics come from. Also if dating on line is so dismal, what is then working? Bars? Work? Classifieds? Where are all these people with relationships coming from?

So Annie, time to cough up your sources. Hehehe.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 19
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 8:42:24 AM
As for abelain, you can reason it any way you so desire, the bottom line does not change.

My reasoning is based on the fact that people wouldn't be here if they weren't getting dates and getting into relationships that were comparable to what they doing offline. That's the bottom line for everyone.

And I will repeat, the majority of guys will disagree with you. Now why is that?

Then why are they (and you) here instead of pursuing your dream partner offline? Performance art?

Oh and for a man who has a fiancee and is getting married, why do you have an open profile on the site that suggests you are still looking. There is no indication in your profile you are off the market.

Then you apparently can't read very well. If you'll look a bit more closely, you'll notice that my status says ``Not Single/Not Looking'' and the very first line in my profile states that I'm not accepting any more applications for dates and that I've left my profile as it was.

That would make you highly suspect.

I'm getting a good idea of why you find it difficult to find someone you can get along with.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 20
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 10:09:55 AM

As for your stauts, you just changed it, I read your profile and made a copy of it after you first resPonded and it said dating. I do that because I KNOW THERE ARE THOSE MEN WHO WILL DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID. I catch them all the time


Wow. Paranoid?

Annie, where are your numbers, these statistics that you talk about? And how do they compare with the real world of bars, clubs or even grocery stores or work.

I read once a report by Gallop that said that about 30 percent of relationships, and that was the largest percentage, were formed AT WORK. Yet, we tell people all the time never to dip your pen in company ink.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 21
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 10:59:38 AM
As for your stauts, you just changed it, I read your profile and made a copy of it after you first resPonded and it said dating.

Not only are you logically challenged, you're dishonest. I haven't changed anything on that profile in almost 2 years. Best of luck finding one of those men you described as:

They are the rare minority of men. The best of the best. The few, the select.

You won't find many of those select men who are willing to put up with dishonest behaviour every time you have a disagreement. Wow.

I do that because I KNOW THERE ARE THOSE MEN WHO WILL DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID. I catch them all the time

You're a real piece of work. I can see why online datig would not be your thing. However, for many of us, online dating does work.
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 22
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 3:04:54 PM
New study reveals surprising answers :
Is on line dating for you ?
A) Are you Female? Go to answer Yes!
B) Are you Male? See below
1) Are you over 6'0 Ft tall? NO: Online dating is not for you
Yes: Continue on
2) Do you have advanced degrees? NO Online dating may be for you; are you a musician? if Yes ONLINE dating is for YOU
YES Online dating may not be for you; Is your degree in Aggressive Business Tactics, International Relations, Overseas Operations with foreign language capabilities? Domestic On line dating is not for you. Seek your answers abroad
Is your degree in counseling, womens studies, therapy services, art history, or environmental decorating ? On line dating is for you!
3) Do you have a car? Is it new? On line dating could be for you. Is it a Acura, Honda, Lexus, Toyota, Cadillac, Mercedes or Audi? ONline dating is for you ! If you answered Porsche/Ferrari/Lambourghini , you would not be taking this survey.
Is it over ten years old ? Yes. ONline dating is NOT for you
Is it a 78 Chevy Z28 ? Take off your shirt, sit on the hood; ONLINE DATING has been WAITING for you!
4) Do you have an ex, with a nasty divorce and a full commitment to baby drama? On line Dating is for you!
5) Have you never been married, never had kids, no financial judgements, no alimony, and dont smoke ? On line Dating is definitely NOT for you ! Collect your Red Flag, and exit site to the left.
 minderzsue09
Joined: 4/27/2011
Msg: 23
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 4:12:47 PM
abelian, I appreciate your thoughts and am glad to hear you have met your fiance through a dating site! I have taken initiative and have sent out multiple emails to guys I was interested in after reading their profiles and never recieved any sort of response.

Also, I try not to narrow down my options to just online dating but I havent heard many success stories of meeting at the bar scene. I don't mind going but I don't go to look for a potential partner just because most of them spend a great majority of their time there and I'm not sure I want someone like that, in fear that they may never change.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 24
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 4:22:21 PM

I have taken initiative and have sent out multiple emails to guys I was interested in after reading their profiles and never recieved any sort of response.

Well, for comparison purposes, I sent out at least 350 messages and got back, maybe 1 in 5 after getting the hang of it. It took a while to get a feel for how to get someone's attention. About 100 women initiated contact with me. That all led to a number of first dates that went nowhere, but the one first date that did with my fiancee was due to her initiating contact with me.

Also, I try not to narrow down my options to just online dating but I havent heard many success stories of meeting at the bar scene.

I basically hate going to bars and socializing, in general, so this seemed like a good way to date. It's easy if you do the dating part as a sideline to the forums.
 minderzsue09
Joined: 4/27/2011
Msg: 25
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 4:27:36 PM
I haven't been stuck in front of my computer. I have some pretty good social skills I just am unsatisfied with anyone I have met just yet. I go to school full-time and work as many hours as possible. I just make different decisions, instead of going out at 11 when I get done with my classwork only to get up at 5 in the morning the next day, I use my social skills in the best way I can without draining my energy. When I have time, I go out and meet people where I can and enjoy myself. But as I mentioned before, meeting people in bars isn't my thing and I haven't been too lucky with meeting people at school, even through all of my involvement.

I got out of a two year relationship that I put my heart and soul into. And I just want to feel that amazing again... well before he said he just didn't love me anymore, that is. I think that is the only reason I get as frustrated as I do about this.

I feel as if my personality might be overpowering just because I know what I want with my life and grab the bull by the horns. I don't think men my age care much for that.
 Spider_MacGyver
Joined: 6/11/2011
Msg: 26
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 5:40:37 PM
Woaaaah: I think this is the very first time I've ever had to use this emoticon

Note to self: if you're going to go after a fellow fishie to attempt to discredit him in the forum as a liar, pick one who is not already generally very well known / liked /uhm, well, or at least respected... for his honesty and consistency.

OP,
Sorry you had a bad breakup. Natural to feel as you describe, afterwards. To my eye, many/most describe the online experience as you do, most of the time. But IMNAAHO, it need not be either/or.

I met a man who, instead of casting a big net all day, ran a trout line -- threw his ad up on various sites and left it there while he went about his daily life. Didn't check in to see who looked or winked, but had it set where if someone actually contacted him, he rec'd email notification.
 Laha Math
Joined: 7/15/2010
Msg: 27
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 8:34:28 PM
OP: It's hard to say if online dating is "your thing" since you don't seem to have been on any dates initiated online. Plenty of Fish doesn't seem to be living up to your expectations, whatever they may be. What sort of response were you expecting? To go on dates you have to work at it, like anything else. If you register on a website to get easy dates without any effort you'll get the kind of responses you describe. You'd probably get better results by learning how to use the website and working it to find people you'd like to date.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 28
view profile
History
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 8:50:51 PM
I think you need to consider it just another venue for meeting people. There are regional forums, have you checked out the forum for your state? We have had lots of events lately in my area, I've gone to quite a few and had a great time.

I think you need to focus on things you enjoy, or maybe something new you want to check out (photography...hula dancing?? haha). I've always had guy friends, so by the time I started dating, I had a comfort level of hanging around and talking to guys. My kids and I have done volunteering and been involved in all types of social groups, it makes it easier to get to know people and some will gravitate to you and you to them. Go find something you want to do and go by yourself, don't take your girlfriend posse along everywhere you go. Check out what local events, festivals, etc. are going on in your area and go have a good time! Just be open, go to have fun and talk to people, don't just sit there like a potted plant....haha.

The internet is just another means of meeting and interacting with people, noone should depend on just one venue...church, school....etc. and depend on that to meet someone you'd want to date. Make friends with guys, they're not all that scary once you get to know them.
 Janet_Always
Joined: 12/7/2010
Msg: 29
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 9:00:45 PM
It just takes time... you've only been only here about 2 months. I've been here (again, actually) since December and have met only 4 men total. Two went nowhere after the first meet, one I dated for about 2 months and the most recent I've been seeing for about a month.

I am new to this area (and know NO ONE), which is why online seemed to be a better choice. In the past, IRL was how I usually met people... but I'd been living there for many years and had friends I went out with, regular places I would visit, etc.
 Solitairesway
Joined: 12/2/2006
Msg: 30
view profile
History
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/20/2011 9:05:15 PM
Ms. Mindeorzsue09,

I think you should be flexable in your decisions regarding dating. Don't just limit yourself to the online option. You are @ a great time of your life to explore, learn & grow through the choices you make ultimately. Just follow you gut & heart.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 31
Is online dating my thing?
Posted: 6/21/2011 9:04:39 PM

And I hate to burst your bubble, men like I am looking for, very much exist. They are the rare minority of men. The best of the best. The few, the select. And if I wanted just a mere date, I do not need a dating site. That is why I am not looking for just a date.


And the moment nobody would agree with her, without providing any evidence, she just pouted, took all her toys and left.

The type of people I love to meet in real life.
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