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 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 98
What do they see when they look in the mirror?Page 10 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
I'm 55, and actually I see pretty much the same guy I saw 20 years ago.

20 years ago, I was 5' 8" tall, weighed 175 lbs., had a 34' waist, blue-green eyes, and a lot of gray hair (prematurely gray)

NOW...I'm 5' 8" tall, weigh 175 lbs., have a 34" waist, blue-green eyes, and a lot of gray/silver hair.

And I've been the same every year in between. Some things don't change so much.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 99
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/27/2011 2:38:03 PM

And I've been the same every year in between. Some things don't change so much.


I look better than I did 20 years ago because I lost quite a bit of weight.

But as for changing or not changing . . . I met a guy who looked several years older than his pictures. He said that they were 3-4 years old but he didn't see any need to post new ones because he hadn't changed any. He looked the same weight, I think he didn't know his true height, but his face had deep wrinkles that were not on his face in the pictures. (I am pretty sure I wrote this on a much earlier post on this same thread.)

That was over four years ago, and he still has the same pictures on his profile. When he looks in the mirror, does he not see those deep grooves? New pictures are not only for weight gain or loss, but other aspects, as well.
 richv96
Joined: 9/25/2010
Msg: 100
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/27/2011 10:26:09 PM
I have wondered the same thing. I am well aware of the fact that I don't see myself as old, or as old as my birthdate suggest. I am aware of the ever increasing wrinkles, gray hair and odd hairs growing wear they never did before. I pluck, I color, use skin cream...lol. The point to me is I don't try to converse with 20 to 30 yr olds, however I have plenty of e-mails from 60+ men. I had one asking " is 69 to old for you"? I answered," being my mother is 71 I think maybe a bit".
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 101
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 5:02:20 AM
Me, I look at my younger brother I find he looks really old and worn out, so I figure I must look even more old and worn out. That is when I know I am delusional when I dream of a sweet young 46 year old female companion.......
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 103
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 8:29:26 AM
...I attended my niece's wedding last month and of course there were lots of family and friends in attendance. Looking around, I couldn't help but notice how everyone had aged since I last saw them..... especially the cousins my age.....I seriously thought they looked older than me.

But then maybe they're thinking the exact same thing about me.

It's true...I've been peering at this old face and body in the mirror year after year and I only see the subtle changes, another wrinkle...a couple more greys hairs, a pound here and there. I lift the skin from my forehead and eyes....much better, much, much better.

Damn the laws of gravity.

...mae
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 104
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 8:34:05 AM
I think I already posted on here, but I'm too lazy to go look.
I like what I see when I look in the mirror. Although I know
I'll always see a fat person even though I'm not.

It only matters to me what the person that loves me sees, and
I'm sure his mirror will be as delusional or reasonable as necessary.

People fault others for not seeing their fat or unattractiveness.
Nothing wrong with looking in the mirror and liking what you see,
no matter how others see you. If you meet someone who's mirror
is visually challenged...just pass them on by...or if it makes you feel
better, you can point out their flaws for them.

In the end we like what we like and we choose who we want.
 Orgulloso
Joined: 8/28/2010
Msg: 105
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 11:10:04 AM
Hmmm...interesting topic.

I guess the ladies would have to chime in after I post but what do I see?

A 50 year old that is aging gracefully. No delusions of grandeur.

G
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 106
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 1:35:22 PM

Not really delusional since I have dated men from 47 to 54.. All the ones my age are looking for spring chickens..


Looking for, yes, I would imagine. Finding......? Mature women have a certain allure that appeals to younger men. However, I wonder what a Spring chicken would find appealing in a "mature+" man?
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 108
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 3:42:33 PM

That is when I know I am delusional when I dream of a sweet young 46 year old female companion.......


Why do you seek a 46 year old companion? What is the difference between a 46 year old woman and a 50 year old woman?
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 109
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 5:11:31 PM
Ruby, I was just wondering how different a 46 year old woman looks and acts from a 50 year old woman and WHY it would make a difference to a 50+ man!
 1proudmom
Joined: 2/12/2006
Msg: 110
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 6:26:03 PM
The number of men who think they are "good looking" and are looking for an "attractive woman" is astounding. Are these men losing their eyesight or did their mommy tell them they are cute? I also wonder about the guy who needs to lose 50 pounds and describes himself as "a few extra pounds"

Do men EVER grow up?
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 111
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 6:37:57 PM

The number of men who think they are "good looking" and are looking for an "attractive woman" is astounding. Are these men losing their eyesight or did their mommy tell them they are cute? I also wonder about the guy who needs to lose 50 pounds and describes himself as "a few extra pounds"


This was my question about the 280 pound man who thinks that he is not obese! I am sure that women think and say the same types of things, but I don't see many of their profiles.

Of course, I am absolutely gorgeous, and if men don't see me that way, they need glasses. (Evil grin.)
 statemachine500
Joined: 8/25/2011
Msg: 112
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/28/2011 10:01:31 PM
The mirror looks ok,but pics of myself are frightful,greying started at 18 and hasn't let up.The beard also has a great deal of white.So I don't post them.Body is the only thing I can influence,lots of exercise and weight training,along with HRT which will pick you up a great deal if combined with the proper diet,no smoking and very small amounts of alcohol.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 113
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/29/2011 5:21:07 AM
Well, I don't find age to be particularly defining, its more like attitude. Not much difference between a 46 year old and a 56 year old, except, probably, they are on either side of menopause.

If you do look into profiles, you quickly notice that the 45+ something ladies tend to have age limits with a larger span below their age than above, so older men must have some bad press in the common mind.

In terms of physical beauty, my view is that many of the "few extra pounds" women out there are quite beautiful and appealing, so its not weight per se that is a factor. More like being able to do the kind of activities that fit in with a lifestyle.

In terms of energy, I do think it wanes with advancing age. I need my nap these days, and if it happens when a woman is around, more and more its just a nap. Not like the wild days of youth......
 Portlanderr
Joined: 9/29/2010
Msg: 114
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/29/2011 6:26:27 AM
When someone asks me how old I am I tell them I'm 95 (that's not a typo either). Then they say I look great for my age.

 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 115
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/29/2011 6:33:48 AM

And yeah you're absolutely gorgeous!!!


At last! All those bids for compliments got one.


Well, I don't find age to be particularly defining, its more like attitude. Not much difference between a 46 year old and a 56 year old, except, probably, they are on either side of menopause.


Ruby told me that you were kidding--it's sometimes hard to tell in writing.


If you do look into profiles, you quickly notice that the 45+ something ladies tend to have age limits with a larger span below their age than above, so older men must have some bad press in the common mind.


Old farts can be lewder and cruder than the young studs, and they can be more persistent. However, there are other problems with guys approaching 70; I had an email from one yesterday and his picture looked like a picture of my deceased father. No thanks!

I see many profiles of men who list their ages near mine and I think, dang, I MUST look young for my age because these guys look SO much older! It could be vanity on my part, and it could be that some of these men are lying about their ages or they haven't aged well. Because I have met several men who did lie about age, I assume that they are lying.
 kari135
Joined: 9/1/2009
Msg: 116
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/29/2011 10:32:09 AM

If you do look into profiles, you quickly notice that the 45+ something ladies tend to have age limits with a larger span below their age than above, so older men must have some bad press in the common mind.

I have a cut off on my mail settings that has nothing to do with my personal preference. It's bad enough to get the two word messages from the young and indiscriminate, but the thought of getting it on with someone my son's age - no way, not in this lifetime. I'd rather have someone my own age, within 5 or 6 years either way. But the profiles of the men within that age range in my area either want someone who's a lot younger, or they have so many "musts" on their profile, it rules out anyone who is relatively normal. The few who did contact me during the short time my profile was un-hidden after I moved were men in my age range, but all they were interested in was cybersex. They weren't interested in meeting a real human being.
 amethyst10616
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 117
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/29/2011 1:40:30 PM
I think it is best not to say that you think you look younger than your age; beauty is in the eye of the beholder:)

Many people grow old with fewer wrinkles and gray hairs, but genes and lifestyle contribute greatly to that. Diet is a huge factor along with exercise as well.
 fresh2day
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 118
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/30/2011 5:29:51 PM
Maybe it's just happening with me, but does anyone else ask whether/not there is a disconnect between what people over 45 actually see when they come face to face with their mirrors or their photos? There seem to be quite a lot of people who take a look at themselves and then describe themselves on their profiles as "curvy and 10 years younger than my real age." Doctors would describe most of them as 50-100 pounds overweight, and others viewing their photos might think "looks his/her age." Based on your own personal experiences, how in touch with reality do you think most people over 45 are when it comes to their "real age"?

the real question for me is, I know now what i SEE in the mirror, but what does the opposite sex see when THEY look at you? I usually hate my look so assume they will too so my angst is high. when I was younger for some reason, that did not usually happen.LOL!
 fresh2day
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 119
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/30/2011 5:31:43 PM
was responding to ready real. could not get the box around it.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 120
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 10/30/2011 5:54:12 PM

Based on your own personal experiences, how in touch with reality do you think most people over 45 are when it comes to their "real age"?


I was at a casual friend's house last night. She is 69. She was discussing her inability to find a date (she is on a dating site). She said that part of her problem was that she didn't look her age. I THOUGHT that she was going to say that she looked older, but instead, she said, "I look so much younger than when a man talks to me and finds out how old I really am, he wants nothing to do with me."

No, no, no . . . yet this woman is very much grounded in reality in other areas!

So, when people tell me that I look younger than my age, I don't take it with a grain of salt, but with a boulder. Hearing people say things such as my friend said helps me keep a reality check.


I usually hate my look so assume they will too so my angst is high.


Why do you hate your look? If you do not like something about yourself, it will very likely affect the way that you present yourself.

I am vain and I suppose that I am conceited. When I look in the mirror, I like what I see--weight, wrinkles, and all. I know that I could look much worse. Because I am vain, I take the time to maximize my good features.


does anyone else ask whether/not there is a disconnect between what people over 45 actually see when they come face to face with their mirrors or their photos?


Although this is the Over 45 forum, we are not the only age bracket who do not see their images clearly. I once remarked to my students that I used to weigh 250 pounds; a young woman in the class remarked, "That's not so much; I weigh 200 pounds and I am not fat."

Yes, she was.
 DoubleParked
Joined: 10/22/2008
Msg: 121
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 11/2/2011 2:09:36 PM
I rarely scrutinize myself in the mirror. Just to make sure everything is buttoned or zipped and I don't go out into the world looking like (too much) of a crazy lady.

Mirrors have a way of sucking a person IN, and then they become obssessed with their image. That way lies madness.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 123
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 11/4/2011 10:33:43 AM
Even after reading the posts in this forum, some posters in this forum look in the mirror and let what they see be influenced by other people AND by what they want to see.

Alas.

If I base what I see on what many tell me, I guess that I should see an average weight woman who looks 45-50 instead of the plump woman who turns 59 today.

Right.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 124
What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 11/5/2011 6:29:13 PM

I think you'd be wise to go with what people are telling you, Gwen. They are clearly more objective and obviously very wise.

Oh, and I see something is different about your photo...can't quite put my finger on it, though...


What you see is a NOW 59 year old woman instead of a 58 year old woman.

I do not want to fall into the trap of believing my own press releases!



Happy B'Day Gwen!!!


Azul, thank you!
 Dave of Indiana
Joined: 3/18/2009
Msg: 125
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What do they see when they look in the mirror?
Posted: 11/6/2011 6:09:31 AM

I always lie about my weight. The only person who knows my weight is my doctor and me. I lie on my driver's license about my weight, I lie if someone asks me (and why would someone ask you?). Height, I knock that up half in inch too to make it an even 5'1". WTF cares. I don't lie about my job, what's to lie about. To me there are questions I'm not going to ask a potential date - how much do you weight and how many women have you slept with. I'm not answering those questions either if someone asks me. I'm good with who I am.


Honesty! A well sought after commodity. Why couldn't you live closer?

Since I don't, generally, view men's profiles I have to accept what the ladies here are saying they read. Please remember ladies that men read the same "disconnects" in women's profiles. One trend (at least in my area) is women posting a younger picture to be displayed in a search and then a newer picture once inside the profile. Sort of "bate and switch" tactic. But them men might be doing the same thing? I don't know. People (men and women) tend to "embellish" their profiles because we want to come across in the best light. Simple Marketing 101.
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