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 dbiggs69
Joined: 12/12/2010
Msg: 226
Men 40+ and ChildlessPage 10 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
Would you prefer a man with kids with multiple women! Damn if you do,damn if you don't !
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 227
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/7/2014 1:12:17 PM

Posted by cooldog65:
"I have absolutely no interest in fathering or raising children. Not now, not ever."

Attaboy, cooldog65! We are reading from the same sheet of music.
When I look around at my well-appointed townhouse and my rewarding flexible lifestyle...there are no regrets.
Kids are wonderful and I like chatting with my nephew. Just glad things are in limited doses. LOL.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 228
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 8:17:56 AM
I have absolutely no interest in fathering or raising children. Not now, not ever.

You're welcome.
 ouija2013
Joined: 12/9/2012
Msg: 229
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 8:56:58 AM
just an FYI..
you wanna leave that fancy stuff and cash to me Great! I will call you weekly, send cards at holidays. Promise not to put you on an ice floe when you are 90.
I have never been asked why we didn't have children. I must have " selfish" tattooed somewhere LOL
 LoneScottishBoy
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 230
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 11:41:19 AM

I must have " selfish" tattooed somewhere LOL


I keep trying to tell you in between gasps for breath, but then you bring out the whipped cream and all hell breaks loose. :P
 ozsealady1
Joined: 6/13/2013
Msg: 231
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 3:48:41 PM
Can all the mature men without children please form an orderly queue
I have a multitude of single ladies, also sans children who would love to meet you.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 232
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 5:34:07 PM
^ Oooh! Me me me! I'll start the line. Form behind me please. (Well, I don't mind the children. She can have children, for all I care.)
 easterparadehat
Joined: 4/14/2014
Msg: 233
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 5/21/2014 7:33:44 PM
What has me puzzles me is the thread of a menopausal women getting pregnant. You mean pre-menopausal? To me the term means going a year without a period and the natural cessation of hormones. I'm going to the gyne next Friday for results of a blood test to measure my hormones and getting replacement if needed.
 AZ-CA,Guy
Joined: 8/24/2006
Msg: 234
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 6/22/2014 8:01:49 PM
Everyone is different But, For me I got caught up in the family business. I did have a few girlfriends. Some long term 6 + years & a few short term. I guess I have never found ""THE ONE"" I wanted to marry & have kids with.
I have had the chance to do a lot more with my life than my friends with kids.
I can tell you that most of my friends that did have kids are divorced. Some have had kids with 2 or more different people.
I do feel bad for the kids when the parents divorce.
I'm 47 now. single. Never married, No kids. I don't really want kids now that I am this age.
 oceanstorms
Joined: 4/10/2014
Msg: 235
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 6/24/2014 9:14:31 AM
One of my brothers made a conscious choice to not have children. He told me once, although I never asked, he didn't want to turn into his father and that it wouldn't have been fair to any child to undergo what he went through as a child. My other brother didn't have children until he was 42 when he met and married a woman with three children of her own. He focussed on school then a very lucrative career and was a workaholic for years ... now he has it all a huge place in Texas and three kids of his own. It would never have occurred to me to ask him why he didn't have kids...as I never appreciated when people asked me why I had six children!
 Xmasguy
Joined: 5/13/2011
Msg: 236
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/7/2014 4:54:26 PM

I run into alot of men in their 40s and beyond that never had children and it always makes me wonder: What happened?


I didn't go around getting women pregnant.



Could you men in your 40s+ explain why is it you never had children (those that don't)?


I was career military and lived in military towns. Most of the dating pool had already been married and could no longer have children (Tubal, Hysterectomies) or you needed to know who you were dealing with and use protection. If not you were going to be paying a LOT of child support. I decided that children did not line up with my career goals, and where I was trying to go so I focused on my career.


How and why do you think you can relate to a woman that has children?


Well lets see.........I have been asked that question before, by single moms and they really won't listen to any explanation you give them, because they are using that as an excuse to get rid of you. I'm a High School Teacher and I deal with teenagers in excess of 12 hours a day. Usually a lot more than the parents do. I have the trust and confidence of the parents that they call me when their kids are slacking off that I will talk to them and get them back on the right track because as the parents say: "They look up to you, and they don't want to disappoint you." I have always been good with kids, and most of the single moms I have dated know that and their kids liked me because I listened to them and did things with them when I was around. The issue women with children have is that most of them envy your freedom, and wonder why you would stick around and put up with them so they go into "sabotage mode" and chase you off.


Do you think about having children when you are 50 or older or what? I assume that must cut out alot of women in their later 30s and 40s and beyond for dating.


At 45, having children is not an agenda item. I am not going to be in my 60's attending a High School graduation unless I'm still teaching. I enjoy the freedom that I have to travel and go out to dinner or stay home, and no Babymamadrama.
 rftv1020
Joined: 5/13/2014
Msg: 237
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/7/2014 5:08:41 PM
I never had children, by choice, my choice. Never changed a diaper. Never even held a baby. Hard to believe I know but a person can live a happy healthy fun filled life without children. Also I didn't want to ruin my boyish figure.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 238
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/12/2014 2:07:22 AM
I couldn't see myself as a parent. And as it turned out, my wife was not cut out for parenthood. I don't regret not having kids. I know I get yardsticked by possible dates, because of that. If certain women want to judge me as inferior because I am childless, then I really don't want them around me.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 239
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/12/2014 2:04:47 PM

How and why do you think you can relate to a woman that has children?

With my brain. Just like with anything else.

Of course, this means that, yes, not all non-parents can do this, because it takes a brain for many things, and we all know that many people aren't good at many other things either which require a brain or the ability to relate. Just like not all parents have any business being parents.

Could you men in your 40s+ explain why is it you never had children (those that don't)?

The question put like this always makes it sound like children should be the goal...such that a person shouldn't put much thought into who they conspire with to have those children or what the future might be like with that person and for the children.

For me, at least, the goal was never only to have children. The goal was to find that other half...one which was worth having the children with, and one with which a future for the family seemed promising.

That should answer the question sufficiently.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 240
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/12/2014 2:28:12 PM

Could you men in your 40s+ explain why is it you never had children (those that don't)?


Can you people who have kids explain why you feel a need to have kids and contribute to over-population and the problems associated with that?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 241
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/12/2014 3:25:15 PM
"Can you people who have kids explain why you feel a need to have kids and contribute to over-population and the problems associated with that?"

Exactly!

Even most animals are smart enough to not to breed when food/water is in short supply.

The older I get, the more I can't understand why any women would put her body through child bearing.

Men and women who are childless don't need to justify their behavior. They simply have no need to produce a "mini me".
 oldie_but_hottie
Joined: 2/4/2012
Msg: 242
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/14/2014 12:47:08 PM
It takes two to have children, unlike women who just need a sperm donor, men can't have children on their own (unless they adopt). So it does not need to be a selfish or health issue on the man's side, could just be an unwilling or incapable partner. Maybe the unwilling partner may even be the reason that some of those middle-aged guys find themselves single on POF and without family at an age where they would prefer to look forward to grand kids ...
 ClooneysTutor
Joined: 3/30/2014
Msg: 243
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/14/2014 1:06:38 PM
I actually respect the men that didn't have children that knew they weren't mature enough to raise them properly. I created 2 single mother situations.

I will always carry the guilt of not being there as much as I could have been if I had stayed in those marriages rather then pursuing my own happiness. Nothing is more heartbreaking then telling your child that they are not the reason you left, while not vilifying their mother.

My sons will fully understand the risks of hasty marriages when they call me and tell me they've met The One. We will have long talks indeed...
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 244
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/15/2014 4:26:14 PM
Rozewater- I don't understand the bias towards childless people, men or women.
It's a huge life choice.
I always knew I wanted children, but not everyone does. So what?
It seems much more responsible to me to NOT have children if you don't want them than to have them just because some people think you are defective if you don't.
Frankly, avoiding the ex/step child drama doesn't sound so bad to me.
I've met a lot of men that wanted to have children, but for several reasons, didn't.
I don't think any less of people who don't have children.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 245
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/15/2014 6:20:04 PM
For the people who use the religious card, saying God has ordered every person on the planet to breed, which is a very popular argument-and even some non-religious people use it: remember that there are people who do not breed because of religion. The RC nuns and priests, monks, and maybe other religious figure heads are child-free. I've heard the arguments trying to justify their child-free (and marriage free) status, but the bottom line is to practice what you preach.
 funchesf
Joined: 6/27/2014
Msg: 246
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/16/2014 6:22:00 AM

Could you men in your 40s+ explain why is it you never had children

due to watching "The Bad Seed"..."The Children of the Corn"... and "Damien Omen 2"
 Jimmy9861
Joined: 6/8/2014
Msg: 247
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/16/2014 12:29:27 PM
I have been married and have dated a couple of women (yes they we were intimate), and some didn't want anymore or they couldn't have children . I helped my ex raise her 2 children and a granddaughter and would do anything for them and treated them as blood. So don't judge a man 45 plus why they don't have biological children. There maybe a logical answer
 Szaszaspasz
Joined: 11/13/2012
Msg: 248
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Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/17/2014 3:59:17 AM
I run into alot of men in their 40s and beyond that never had children and it always makes me wonder: What happened? Could you men in your 40s+ explain why is it you never had children (those that don't)? How and why do you think you can relate to a woman that has children? Do you think about having children when you are 50 or older or what? I assume that must cut out alot of women in their later 30s and 40s and beyond for dating.


I figure there are many scenarios or reasons as to why these fellows never did. I never wondered because I never had the inclination to have children myself. As for relating to people with children; one does that everyday (either in dating or non-dating scenarios). A person will relate best with someone who has common interests or points of view.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 249
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/17/2014 7:29:46 AM

I run into alot of men in their 40s and beyond that never had children and it always makes me wonder: What happened?


If you run into someone who has one child, do you ask them why they stopped at one child instead of having a boat load of kids? If someone has a ton of kids, do you ask them why didn't they stop breeding after one kid?
 Hamilton12345
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 250
Men 40+ and Childless
Posted: 7/17/2014 4:35:24 PM
I would never assume that something happened. Some people just aren't interested in having kids and there is nothing wrong with that. Some people never met the right person to have kids with and some people can't have kids. Not quite sure why anyone would need to explain why.

What I do find amusing is that it is not okay to comment on people not having kids, but perfectly acceptable to make nasty comment about people who do have children. Why is that? Just wondering.

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