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 garvey14
Joined: 6/6/2011
Msg: 47
I know I should be running away but.....Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Being at someone's beckon call does not make you a friend it makes you a lap dog. you sound like a decent guy so if you are being serious there are plenty of women out there that would appreciate that. Now in reality she is obviously taking advantage of that fact and using you. For some it is a sick game, for others, well they simply lack boundaries or common decency.
 ryeguy1988
Joined: 3/8/2011
Msg: 48
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I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 3:49:00 PM
lol I appreciate your kind words Gardenias2, im in the wedding as its my best friend and one of her best friends getting married so were both in it and happen to be paired up to leave the church together,m but thats not the fact. The sensitivity of other people is fine as im not looking for pity etc. was just asking for advice which you have all provided, whether it was advice i asked for or advice on something else the people decided to be experts on. its all good, I now know what my best course of action is , I knew what it was in the first place I guess i just needed some help into seeing that i wasnt be to near sighted on the matter
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 49
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 5:23:30 PM
"Ok well one of the reasons I am on POF is to get back into the dating world and too see what is out there."

You will learn young padawon that your failed logic starts from this statement alone
 gardenias2
Joined: 1/13/2011
Msg: 50
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 6:24:43 PM
If she WAS cheating, then no, you're likely to never get that closure because cheaters aren't honest people, and she probably IS keeping you on the backburner in that case. If she wasn't cheating when she left you? Then perhaps once some time has passed, you might get the answer you are seeking.


why on earth would you steer him away from confrontation and getting closure? its extremely painful to many when there is no closure. have you ever experienced it? shoots i'd advise him to hire a private detective before i would tell him to suck it up.

and to the other posters who think they are too young to know anything. in my early twenties i was very clear with guys about how i felt in relationships. what made me happy and what made me leave them. very clear, no one was left remotely confused.
 ryeguy1988
Joined: 3/8/2011
Msg: 51
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I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:17:00 PM
Im no longer sitting here wondering why she left me because its really irrelevant(sp?) at this point I was asking for advice and for those who offered the advice I appreciate it. For those of you who offered criticism, I can handle that, I don't mind, however, I do with you all the luck in finding a partner as pessimistic as some of you may have been.

I like to see myself as Optimistic, and will learn from my life experiences, like I said I still believe decisions I have made have been ones I believed to be most beneficial to myself and at the time to her, you all may think that just because a bigger percentage of marriages that are between young people fail that none will ever work, but sorry it can and im sure there are a lot of lucky people out there that will experience that. I for one can't say that I will marry for a very long time again if ever, its one of those decisions you can't make just like that. But I will say marriage is worth it, and to those who get to experience it until the die, kudos to you.
 nicegirl1974
Joined: 7/25/2010
Msg: 52
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:27:27 PM
It's a tough call but i think she was seeing him all along..and he realized what she was like and ran...and now she is trying to work it back out with you till something better comes along....i suggest marriage counselling dunno if she will go but u can try...Good Luck :)
 ryeguy1988
Joined: 3/8/2011
Msg: 53
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I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/7/2011 7:31:36 PM
na i suggested counselling back then so im not asking that, I mean id like to go back to how things were back then, but so much has happened Im quite sure that it would always be on the back of my mind what had happened and it would be best as others said to cut ties, which will happen a week from sunday when all of the Wedding festivities for our friends are over, no need to cause extra stress on our friends at this time in there relationship.

it's possible that she may have been seeing him since, I don't think so just because the city she lives in is very small and she would have had a difficult time keeping it quiet, maybe she did but ill never know and frankly, no longer care, would be nice to get the knowledge of it if it happened but probably for the best if I don't lol.
 Malley
Joined: 5/12/2007
Msg: 54
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 7/8/2011 11:06:59 AM

will learn from my life experiences, like I said I still believe decisions I have made have been ones I believed to be most beneficial


That's the truth. All any of us can do is make the best decision we can, with what we know, at that specific point in time. To have no regrets is the only way to live.

While you may be chronologically young, your wisdom far exceeds your years.
It's refreshing to see someone, anyone, who accepts responsibility and the resulting consequences for their actions.

You've got the proper outlook, m'love. There are no mistakes in life, rather lessons to be learned.

I know, all to well, how confusing and hurtful it is to be left wondering what happened, however, it takes two to make a relationship work, one to end it. You're correct, what does it matter? Sounds like you've done what you can to get to the root of what she can't or won't communicate. You can't fix what you don't know is broken.

Becoming jaded would be avoided if more followed your lead vs laying blame by holding others accountable.

Hindsight changes nothing, bitterness averted.

Some (many)things are beyond our control. In situations such as yours, your reaction to her action is all you need to concern yourself with.


it would be best as others said to cut ties, which will happen a week from sunday


You're a wise young man. Trust your instincts and do as you see fit.


no need to cause extra stress on our friends at this time in there relationship.


You're to be commended for placing your friends wedding above your personal troubles. Yet another sign of possessing a wisdom beyond your years.

I wish nothing but the best for you.
 ravenhair4u
Joined: 8/13/2011
Msg: 55
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 8/28/2011 3:14:43 PM
She cheated on you & left you after only 4 months of marriage? Now that the guy she left you for is ignoring her & blowing her off, she is interested in you again. She is a train wreck. Why didn't the boyfriend come to her rescue when she was stranded in her car? She is playing games with you, Stop calling her & don't visit w/her anywhere. She'll lead you on, & dump you again when she gets another new man. Move on.
 Pasionlatina529
Joined: 8/5/2011
Msg: 56
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 8/28/2011 3:20:15 PM
Listen to the ICEMAN...
 SweetofSerendipity
Joined: 8/1/2011
Msg: 57
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 8/28/2011 3:24:32 PM
Hi Ryan,

No one has to be in a relationship and you shouldn't settle. I would say she has caused enough deceit, hurt, and pain in your life. Heal from your past and find a woman that desires to be with you because of who you are, not because they are lonely and enjoy the attention.

Best wishes!
 voschi
Joined: 8/24/2011
Msg: 58
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 8/28/2011 6:03:54 PM
not even going to waste time reading this...

go with your guts..always...
 cgm745
Joined: 7/29/2011
Msg: 59
I know I should be running away but.....
Posted: 8/28/2011 7:43:44 PM
Run! It seems like when her new guy isn't doing what she want/needs, she comes to you. Don't be her doormat.
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