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 vixxxy
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 91
boyfriend still goes on pofPage 6 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
i met my ex online, and 6 months later found out he "talks" to A LOT of girls online. i like to call it cheating fantasy. so anyways, he keeps talking to these girls, receives some naked pictures i find, and then decides i want to actually physically get with them. i think you know the rest... dump his ass before you physiologically get destroyed.
 oOdangalangOo
Joined: 5/8/2011
Msg: 92
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History
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 8:36:45 AM
That would raise the question "what is he looking for." For me...as soon as I start talking to someone I deactivate my account.

Relationships start with trust. The question to ask is "Can I honestly trust him now?"
 AddHomonym
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 93
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 8:47:15 AM
I cannot believe how gullible some folks are.

Which part of Plentyofifsh or Dating site are people having trouble with?

This dude was caught red handed in a lie. BOOT HIM

This dude was caught chatting with other chicks. TO THE CURB

If you get into a relationship (meaning a monogamous union of some sort) then you have no business on any dating site, period. I've never gotten into anything serious from internet dating where both she and I didn't make a point of closing down our accounts. It's a kind of rite of passage, literally closing the book on a chapter of your life.

For buddy the swingin' single up there, carry on carrying on fella. No one can fault you for being honest although they might be wise to make certain they always keep a condom handy. Play safe and all that.

For the OP and anyone else, don't ever tolerate being lied to and treated like shit. You deserve better than that.
 amalefriend
Joined: 8/5/2011
Msg: 94
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 3:12:52 PM
Not much of a damn boyfriend.... If I had that many questions that I felt the need to put up a fake profile, I would have just ended it. He was obviously not worth your time.
 LuvinToLaugh
Joined: 2/9/2011
Msg: 96
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 4:42:16 PM
When a guy wants you and only you he takes his profile off the site. No questions asked.
It's a true sign of how he respects you and your relationship. There is no such thing as chatting to girls on PoF as friends. Don't be fooled by that one.
 HERBALISTDEON
Joined: 10/30/2011
Msg: 97
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 5:21:38 PM
IF YOU MEET SOMEONE ONLINE DONT EXPECT NOTHING GOOD OUT OF IT
 BettyMcFattttyPants
Joined: 12/9/2011
Msg: 98
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 5:39:40 PM
Why are you yelling at us?
 JerryinColumbus
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 99
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 6:00:18 PM
I find it funny that women of all ages are hooking up with guys like this and even after they catch the guy being unfaithful they stay with him. I was married to the same woman for 37 years and went through alot to keep it together all those years.(and so did she) but now when I contact women on here that are my own age they have no interest in me because I was in such a long relationship. I don't get it. Everyone is looking for that special someone to be with the rest of their life but so many pick someone that is unfaithful or they can't get along with and do this over and over.
 WalkingInLondon
Joined: 2/21/2005
Msg: 101
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/4/2012 11:50:26 PM
You should leave the site if you feel this way. I met my fiance on here four years ago. We've been together the entire time, and are getting married this coming June. We don't cheat, and the only reason I have a profile on here is I use many of the forum discussions as 'fodder' for some of my papers. I am working on my PhD in Psychology and have gotten an enormous amount of information about human behavior from these forums. If you check my profile, you will see that it clearly states that I am taken, happily engaged, etc. Not everyone who has a profile on here is some undateable loser, and I had plenty of dates with some really wonderful men before I met my fiance. I had my share of losers, we all make mistakes in judgement, and I had to learn how to spot the 'red flags' like everyone else. But I assure you that I met some wonderful men through this site, and had three who were long-term relationships since I joined in 2003. I have changed my name and tweaked my profile as time went on, but never deleted it. I have hidden it.

The thing that was one of the best indicators of an intelligent man? Good grammar, spelling and the ability to carry on a conversation by email, then im, and then telephone. They didn't want to wait 6 months before meeting, they were looking to meet within a reasonable amount of time, and follow YOUR rules. Oh, and advise to the women, if you carry yourself like a lady, you'll be treated like one!
 Mozzily
Joined: 11/29/2011
Msg: 104
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 1:44:40 PM
No going back now, you will never trust him again.
 BadBoyScout35
Joined: 12/29/2011
Msg: 105
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 2:02:08 PM
As an investigator, I can tell you that if you're already seeing red flags in his behavior and your feelings, then you need to assess what you expect of each other and put it out there. If it's reasonable and he complies, problem solved. If it's reasonable and he doesn't comply, you have a much bigger issue and need to get your butt back to fishing yourself. Sounds like he may have "settled" with you but is looking for something more from someone else or he's an "attention whore" (excuse the term) and loves the interaction from multiple sources instead of being content with you and what you give him. I've found that when dating someone on a regular basis, it's respectful to put the others aside and focus on the one to actually give the real relationship a chance to grow. If he can't do this, then he's not looking for a real relationship, just someone to pass time with until someone new or better or more exciting comes along. If that's the case, then put him back... there are plenty of fish out there looking to get caught ;~)
 andelicka
Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 106
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 3:46:11 PM
phe, what did u expect? Never expect anything good from the men u meet on this bloody dating website.!
 Imtheone678
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 107
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 5:45:54 PM
I also met somone on her and she wanted me to get off here so I told her I would hide my profile and after 4 mths she dicided she wasnt ready for a relationship , I was so glad I didnt go completly off , dont worry not all guys are cheaters
 zbeech
Joined: 5/6/2011
Msg: 108
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 6:46:25 PM
Ok, yes the relationship was doomed...but what difference does it make if she snooped or not? I guarantee there was something he did that made her intuition kick which in turn gave her the idea to see if he was still on POF. The bottom line is ... he lied, he cheated and he got caught and I say better to catch him now than further on down the road when she catches him red handed online with some girl he is trying to meet off a dating website.

Why is online dating not for her?? It doesn't matter if it is online dating or any other kind of dating ... a cheater is a cheater and deserves to get caught ... right or wrong? If you felt someone was cheating on you.. wouldn't you want to catch her and prove you are right.. then move on? Even if I meet someone online and begin a relationship, that doesn't mean I should expect him to lie about closing his account and for him to continue to talk to other women if we have agreed not to do that.

Trust issues happen when trust has been broken and this guy can clearly not be trusted because got caught cheating.
 cin____dy
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 109
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 7:53:52 PM
NO! he is still looking. I had a guy that I thought things were going well, he kept his profile for some time, but when we broke up and he went back with an ex, he deleted immediately. A guy that feels he has found the ONE will be off here so fast. YOu can count on that!
 NolitaFairytale
Joined: 10/4/2011
Msg: 110
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 9:29:23 PM
Yeah, isn't it a dinger when someone you've been talking to tells you that they quit the site, but you find them on here with another name?!
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 111
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 9:31:13 PM

NO! he is still looking. I had a guy that I thought things were going well, he kept his profile for some time, but when we broke up and he went back with an ex, he deleted immediately. A guy that feels he has found the ONE will be off here so fast. YOu can count on that!
Agreed.
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 112
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 9:32:41 PM

phe, what did u expect? Never expect anything good from the men u meet on this bloody dating website.!
ANd why is that?
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 113
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 10:29:50 PM
look, if you are in a committed relationship with this man AND he's still on pof AND willing to chat with some woman, then i think you have the answer to your own question. i mean, it's not like you guys are just dating and seeing other people. you are boyfriend and girlfriend, which means he's a complete cad. no, you can't trust him, and your boyfriend shouldnt' have a bunch of female "friends" that you don't know about. this man is not trustworthy, and i'd get out NOW if i were you. all he is going to do is shut down his account, and put up another one. most likely, it will be one that is unsearchable so that he can spend his time chatting up other women and scamming for an upgrade - because that is what he is doing - keeping his options open. if he was sure about you he wouldn't even risk keeping his profile up on pof for fear of sending you the wrong message and losing you. you are just a woman he is seeing until he meets the woman with whom he really wants a relationship. i know this is hard to hear, but you are a space filler.
 italiancat
Joined: 9/2/2011
Msg: 114
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/5/2012 11:35:12 PM
I also met a guy and spent a few weeks just talking on the phone we met everything was great took me to meet his freinds an i also took him to meet my freinds out of town said he wanted a commited relationship was not looking to play games but after we came back from out of town it seemed like there were alot of excuses why he could not call or see me i friended him on face book while he was out of town for work he says I look and see he recently friended somes lady's no big deal but after he came back to town i went to his page and 1 of the girls had reently changed her profile picture and it was a pic of him and her i did not say anything for a week and just asked him if i should be worried he said no he wanted to be with me but he would only see me 1 time every week in and half .His conversations and texts started getting quite i recenlty met him for drinks everything seemed to be ok he still telling me he wanted to be my man .
He spent the night { NO SEX} everything fine saying how he wanted to see me more and how he really wanted to be with me and that the new year was for us to continue to get to know each other further he left the next morning said he would call later and wanted to see me again that night.
I went to school andI texted him I was early getting out and on the same side of town he lived on he never responded.
I seen him back on here and i messaged him again nothing not sure what happened and he will not say nothing he was saying all the right things for a few months thought he was the nice guy i was looking for
very confused
 Angelsbigheart
Joined: 7/30/2011
Msg: 115
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/6/2012 6:58:19 AM
Hate to say it, but he will NOT stop!! If he was just there 'chatting with friends he had made' then why did he reply to a NEW person (your fake one) expressing how much he'd love to chat?? He may delete the account YOU know about, but that will not keep him from making one you DON'T know about!! I'd cut and run!!

He's just keeping you around while he keeps trying for a better fish!!
 Serindipity_14
Joined: 12/19/2010
Msg: 117
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/7/2012 7:35:36 AM
he a attention junky... he is still fishing... I feel when theright one comes along that nothing would stand in the the way w being w that other person. I feel (plz dont get mad) that he is still looking for the 'one.'. you are just the 'one' for the momment.
 andelicka
Joined: 9/9/2007
Msg: 118
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History
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/7/2012 4:01:17 PM
been here for ages, and only thing they want from me is sex, no commitment. And these dating websites are like drugs. Once u on it, u cant get off it:-(
 fire_and_ice_911_64
Joined: 3/5/2010
Msg: 119
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boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/7/2012 8:42:13 PM
I have been on POF for sometime... and I would have to say over 80% of the guys I have dated NEVER deleted their profile once dating me or anyone else. It has become what it's name is.. fish in the sea.. too many and many games of the heart. Slow down and open communication. If he is still on POF why? What was the reason he joined and now he is dating you.. so why would he need the site. I actually didn't expect most of the guys to delete their profiles until they state they are interested in becoming a "couple".. I wasn't available for every "beck and call" and I wasn't his "bootie call"... so saying this.. expect nothing and only accept what is there. If he is chatting with others.. chances are he cannot be trusted. I am sure you are worth more than this. You simply have to believe it.
 italiancat
Joined: 9/2/2011
Msg: 120
boyfriend still goes on pof
Posted: 1/8/2012 11:20:45 PM
I totaly agree with you it is like drugs . I recently moved and met someone though a friend and he cheated so have been single for a year and joined this site 5 months ago and all they want is sex none of these men are looking for anything besides sex so know if they have to come here and find it then they are not worth wasting your time . I am curious just like everyone else about getting on here and searching but it has proven to be a waste of my time . Why can men just be real they lead to beleive they want more but they really dont after you get to know them they just like to play games .
WHERE ARE ALL THE REAL MEN
HONEST AND ONES REALLY LOOKING TO SETTLE DOWN WITH ONE WOMEN?
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