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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?      Home login  
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 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 14
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?Page 3 of 2    (1, 2)
Chatting online about sex fantasies prior to meeting is about as big a red flag for someone looking for a real relationship as there is. A gentleman would not touch you all over at a first meet in public or within 2 hours. Sounds to me like he is looking for a fling or does not consider you to be a serious partner.
You can find far better then this, do not stoop to this level to get a guy. Real intimacy involves so much more than sex.
 scottey63
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 15
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:39:01 AM
You chatted online for a while about sex fantasies. Assuming you were a willing participant in these chats, it really surprises you that he's just interested in sex?

You might also considering removing the pic on your profile of you in a dress that barely covers your hoochie.
 forumfishie
Joined: 9/17/2009
Msg: 16
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:42:13 AM
"He took me to a bar locally, despite I told him that I had been to that bar and was not particularly crazy about it."

Do you mean he had a gun and pointed it at you and said "YOU, get in the bar!"

In the future, if you don't want to go somewhere, just DON'T, nobody can make you do something you don't want to do

"Meanwhile, he kissed me and almost touched me all over (we chatted online for a while about sex fantasies"

Again, did he put duct tape around your wrists and told you not scream?
or Were you also, kissing him back and touching him too

"we chatted online for a while about sex fantasies"

At least you said WE on this one

"But I am by no means just looking for sex and so he claimed."

And.....you believed him?

"Is he weird?"

No

"Could he be just interested in sex?"

Yes, but his wife only lets him out on wednesday nights
so as long as you are OK with that
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 17
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:47:27 AM

I'not a mind reader I don't know if all the wants is sex. But I do know that if that's not all YOU want you need to stop sending the wrong messages to these men. Start by getting rid of that picture of you in bed. The next step might be NOT talking sexual fantasies online with a guy you don't know. Doing that might give the wrong impression that you are totally open to just sex.
And if your NOT just after sex.Maybe you might want to stop a guy from "Touching you all over" on the first date. That also might tend to give the guy the wrong impression.


THIS IS SO TRUE, women complained that there are no good men out there, only jerks who is after sex but it is their wrong messages they are sending to the guys to see them as sexual object...> Cause and effect ..

Thank you tdh, this open our eyes what we are doing wrong.....
 Spider_MacGyver
Joined: 6/11/2011
Msg: 18
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:54:30 AM
Hold the phone.
OP,
If this is how he acts on the very first date

He took me to a bar locally, despite I told him that I had been to that bar and was not particularly crazy about it.

it is not going to get better.

Agree with above. Don't use sex photos and sex talk to draw in the contacts then complain if they are interested in sex.
 RazaMixta
Joined: 1/19/2011
Msg: 19
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 2:38:05 PM
Well said slepyally!
If men are visual and mostly look at pics. might as well make that your #1 medium of communication, after all a picture paints a thousand words. In fact it holds more weight than anything you might say in your profile.
Turtlenecks... hmm jk
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 20
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 2:47:15 PM
I can't say after one date and a ten minute phone call.
You'll just have to do more recon on him if there is a date #2.

But as a rule...never talk sex fantasies before a date.
Even a bishop will want some if you do.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 21
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 3:26:28 PM

Chatting online about sex fantasies prior to meeting is about as big a red flag for someone looking for a real relationship as there is.

Not everyone who is genuinely seeking a long term committed relationship is opposed to discussing sex. I am one of those that has been blind-sided after 5, 6, 7 or even 10+ dates which finally lead to sex only to find out two things: I really liked him; there was NO sexual commonality or chemistry. It's a bloody shame when that happens, so I learned to just get to the point ~ not usually in email/text/phone, but early on for me. My SO and I had lengthy lengthy communications about myriads of sexual topics. It was mainly "clinical" in nature, but there were some fantasies divulged over time. I'm not talking about phone/text/cyber-sex, rather simply being honest/open/up-front BEFORE wasting one another's time dating only to find out we had NO real reason to date. To each their own, sex is a vital part of my life and I needed someone who was on the same page ~ I'm sure others feel the same way, even if they don't admit it here.

~OP~ Most PEOPLE are interested in sex. Whether or not this man is just seeking sex, only he knows that for a fact. The best way to figure that out is to communicate, date him and see what happens. JMO
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 22
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 3:43:11 PM
My Asian nieces , putting your pictures in your profile as a SNAKE charmers to the pale and dark faces SNAKES,,,,,,,,,surely these sweet SNAKES will rise up stiff and proudly dance to ward you Snake charmers...

Asian niece calling the kettle black when she is the blackest pot lying in a lounger with a tiny cover on her crotch and breast ,her picture in a dating profile,> advice others not to make sexual innuendos to strange man, very funny...

Wise woman Vannili
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 23
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 4:53:33 PM
Wise woman is indeed wise, however, must not judge book by its cover...this niece does not engage in conversations about sex for she has only spread her legs for one man

And with that last prevarication, most smart Forumites will know you as that guy troll who conjured up another fake provocative pic profile to post more inanities seeking the attention lacking in his boring life..
 cashleys
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 24
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 10:10:37 PM
He is a sportsfisherman---out for sex, catches them then thows them back.
 beerchen
Joined: 5/9/2007
Msg: 25
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/13/2011 11:31:21 PM
You might also considering removing the pic on your profile of you in a dress that barely covers your hoochie.



isn't that the truth!

let him go...its a sounding
 karma1160
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 26
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/14/2011 6:06:59 PM
It sounds to me like you are sending the wrong message.
There is no way this person is going to know you are just kidding or not ready, by your behavior.
I would say find a way of saying seriously this is what I want, but I do like to flirt.
Then you might want to put the cabash to mister handsy, if that is not what you are looking for, what is he supposed to think?
At this point your messages are not portraying what you want, stop, come clean and let the chips fall where they may.
 Sportsfreak89
Joined: 12/28/2010
Msg: 27
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/14/2011 10:54:32 PM
It is a possibility he may be looking just for sex but then again, a father of THREE teenage children (which most parents will say are tougher to raise than younger children), works in what is most likely a busy and higher pressure occupation...and who even knows if his divorce is final (I'm assuming you might know?)... he could just have a lot on his plate...after a few more dates I think you'll be able to tell better.
 Lilyinrain
Joined: 10/2/2010
Msg: 28
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/15/2011 4:09:00 AM
By the way, he sent me a text message the next day (this past Tuesday) saying "Good morning honey, did you sleep well?".

I responded saying " I missed you darling but could not read you, what should I".

He replied "See me again".

He said he was going to visit his kids this weekend so "let's connect again early next week".

I texted him yesterday (Thursday) and asked " when should we meet next week".

He replied "I don't know yet. Let's discuss it next week".

I am a little confused. Does he sound like he is passionate, or he is just playing games?
 newbeginnings460
Joined: 8/4/2010
Msg: 29
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/30/2011 12:24:48 AM

I'm not a mind reader I don't know if all he wants is sex. But I do know that if that's not all YOU want you need to stop sending the wrong messages to these men. Start by getting rid of that picture of you on the bed. The the next step might be NOT takling sexual fantasies online with a guy you don't know. Doing that might give the the impression that you are totally open to just sex.

And if your NOT just after sex. Maybe you might want to stop a guy from "Touching you all over" on the first date. That also might tend to give the guy the wrong impression.



DITTO!!

 femaleandflirty
Joined: 7/16/2011
Msg: 30
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/30/2011 1:56:47 AM
I agree that he had another relationship going on for sure....He was going to that bar for a reason. Was it quiet, out of the way and dark??? He was interested in sex of course. I would avoid anyone with teenage children, they can cause all sorts of problems.....resentment, jealousy and not wanting to share their Dad or worried about the inheritance.

Go for a guy that has children that have left home and is willing to spend time with you in broad daylight and another clue is to get them to go on webcam. If they dont want to do that, alarm bells would be ringing. Also if they dont call you much in the evening or week ends, can be another clue there is some other relationship.

Also change that pic because actually it looks rather obscene. It may be just shadow but looks like something else if you catch my drift.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 31
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/30/2011 9:13:20 AM
First, your thumbnail pic says "I so want sex", and as a first sign, you will reel in such types of guys. Talking about sex fantasies online in combination with that, you'll meet more who just want that. Keep that in mind to prevent those situations...

Don't chat so much before meeting. Make your first meeting getting to know them. If you do that online beforehand, you can find out you wasted too much time, and already getting to know things about each other before meeting will push things toward the bedroom, especially if you voice your sexual fantasies beforehand.

It's pretty obvious he was just interested in sex as his main motivator. It doesn't mean he was incapable of more than just sex (if he felt he hit it off), but sex was his driving force... that's what sex fantasy talk & such will do to a guy... and probably why he bolted, because it'd be silly for him to waste both your time if you wanted more than just sex and that's all he ended up wanting.
 notjustfishnchips
Joined: 2/12/2009
Msg: 32
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/30/2011 1:36:41 PM

THIS IS SO TRUE, women complained that there are no good men out there, only jerks who is after sex but it is their wrong messages they are sending to the guys to see them as sexual object...> Cause and effect



wow, well all I can say is that I have saved messages where I did NOTHING of the sort, yet boys (b/c mature men truly looking for a relationship do not act this way) have sent me some nasty messages talking about what they're doing with my photo on my profile, what they'd like for me to do with them, etc. I, in no way, shape, or form, enticed them to send me rude comments out of no where in reference to this! HOWEVER, I do agree that if you're discussing sex fanatasies with a man, then that man will show up for the date expecting the fantasy to happen!
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 33
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 7/30/2011 5:46:44 PM
Maybe he is GENUINELY interested in SEX!


Why not ASK HIM what his intentions are?
 brokenhalf
Joined: 3/29/2011
Msg: 34
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 8/8/2011 1:08:38 PM
so agree with Janet.. look you kno whe's not good for you.. so move on to the next... and you put a lil TMI about him on here .. with that default pic i can amost see your panties.. even i want sex now.. and how can you blame him you are teasing him by having phone sex and now he's the bad guy.. geesh SMH we all want sex. were humans.. and it's an important thing to have and it's upto you if you give it up.. a man will only go as far as you allow ..
 brokenhalf
Joined: 3/29/2011
Msg: 35
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 8/8/2011 1:42:31 PM
you answered the question yourself.. he's obviouslly no good for you..so why linger.. and stop leading men on.. don't complain that he wants sex when you been having phone sex or discussing fantasies.. he's only human.. were all horny at times.. and need it.. you can't blame him.. and you are sending the wrong message with your default pic .. even your crotch area caught my eye and I thought about sex.. and i'm not gay but I can almost see your cooch that and your on a bed.. expect sexual encounters messages wth that pic.. who knows maybe he is genuinely interested in you but you cant be mad at the guy for reacting this way.. cause and effect missy...
 warlord1965
Joined: 5/12/2010
Msg: 36
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 8/8/2011 2:52:57 PM
It really is sad that there are guys out there like this.When he didn't even listen to you when you went out on a date and told him you didn't want to go to this bar he should have respected you and honored your wish.I for one am a guy that always asks my date what they would like to do and we talk and work it out together.If he only wanted to talk to you for ten minutes something sounds wrong.If i am interested in a lady I want to talk to her longer.It sounds to me like he just wants sex.I don't want to offend you in any way just becareful because some of us are on here to find a sincere relationship. I hope you find what you are looking for. Goodluck:
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 37
Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 8/8/2011 3:55:53 PM
I think he is generally interested in having sex...

even though that may not be all he wants...
 Jebby16
Joined: 11/3/2007
Msg: 38
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Do you think he is genuinely interested, or he just want sex?
Posted: 8/8/2011 5:33:21 PM
Uh...he probably just wants to
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