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 MsMuscleChick
Joined: 5/31/2011
Msg: 257
What do women want?Page 11 of 17    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)
Well MUV, since you said it, one thing I can say for gay men is normally they are in great shape, do not have tons of baby mama drama, have jobs and have their own homes !!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 258
What do women want?
Posted: 8/1/2011 12:30:19 PM
Well there VGE, I will waste my 3rd post in 10 to address a more detailed post by you.



"but of interest to most women? Higly doubtful."


EXACTLY!!! What's needed here is an uncaring, fun, b1tch of a woman! You can never find one when you need one.

I guess I'm missing why one would need to be uncaring or a bitch to fit into this picture.


"~not necessarily long term romantic partner material, however."


BINGO!! emphasis on "long term romantic" not needed

Yes, that is correct FOR ME.






"I would not have considered a platonic long term partner."

See here in lies the rub, While intimacy, albeit one sided, would not be the problem, possibly even passion, "great sex, love" would be out of the question. While we're at it let's scratch "long term" from the equation.

And from the "ad" you were proposing, there's not a thing wrong with removing sex or long-term from the equation. Different people are happy with different types of relationships, or rather, the dynamics of a relationship being different than what I was seeking for me personally.



Again the issues are daunting, whats needed s I said is an uncaring, fairly attractive, age appropriate b1tch, who cares only for herself.

I personally have had a number of non-romantic/non-long-term-potential relationships over the years for various reasons. I was never uncaring or a **** nor was I involved in those simply for myself. The dynamics were unique because the situation at that time in life were different than when I was seeking a long-term-romantic relationship. To think one can't care for someone without sex or long-term-minded is ridiculous.



Much as the men of POF, labor on day after day, year after year about the wealth and number of them, there's never one there when you need one! Certainly a puzzlement.

I have NO clue what you are typing about here. (I'm guessing you are slamming women such as myself for being honest about separating friendship from long-term potential. Regardless, it's pretty negative to think or type (for that matter) that women don't "labor" just as hard as men when trying to find what they are seeking with the opposite sex.


Oh and before I get a wealth of "OH C'mon this has to be a joke" I'm quite sincere, the need is real, the guy is real, the situation is real.

I'm certain it was a sincere question. Hence, why I personally answered honestly.


This maybe the point where you ladies get to put your heads together and really make an unusual match. Something where the gal has a he11 of a good time, for a while, treated well, she just has to not give a sh1t about the guy!

I can only answer for me, but when I get to know someone, I prefer to care about that person. Whether friendship or something more. I was never looking to just have a good time and ignore emotional attachments. What others do? I don't know ~ it wouldn't set well with me personally to hang out with someone without truly liking who they are, no matter what "category" they reside in my life. But to each their own. Not everyone is wanting emotional ties and this phantom man can very likely find women who would be happy to have a platonic relationship with him, if he is indeed, fun, kind, attractive, etc., etc. JMO
 Tabernacle
Joined: 9/7/2010
Msg: 259
What do women want?
Posted: 8/1/2011 1:56:07 PM
Everyone wants something different.
I want a nerdy guy who will play video games with me, watch b-horror movies, go to conventions. One that I can spend hours talking to. Someone who can debate with me and not get his panties in a bunch.
I want someone who likes to try new things. Who is fine with spending all day just wandering around the city.
Who is kind enough to let the spider go. Who tells me I'm smart more than he tells me I'm pretty.

A lot of confidence and muscles are a turn off for me. I prefer intelligence and humility. Long hair and glasses do help, though =P
 go_geo_go
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 260
What do women want?
Posted: 8/1/2011 4:17:07 PM
They want the one silly. If its not you its not you. Stop plugging yourself. Everyone is fantastic in their own way, but if you aren't the one you aren't the one.
 KAT4EVR
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 261
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/1/2011 7:43:07 PM
You know, you may not be far away with that. OyVay also seems to be heading in that direction for his friend.
I would love to find a man who is a lot like my gay friends from college, whom I lost contact with long ago. One was a great cook and could keep me laughing. He was messy in the kitchen, but I did not mind cleaning up because he cooked great food. Of course, in short time I would have been over 300 lbs , LOL
Another gay friend took me dancing one night, what a great dancer. As long as there are batteries and other gift items in some stores, that may not be too bad an idea.
Someone with fashion sense to get me to dress more fashionable and I don't know how to decorate like some of my other female friends.
I may have to change my profile.
 sensualseekerns
Joined: 6/1/2010
Msg: 262
What do women want?
Posted: 8/1/2011 8:20:37 PM
As the other poster eluded to......too many women are in love with the illusion/delusion. Reality has no value or use for them.

Hence why so many men are rejected outright for simply trying to be decent everyday guys.

There is a major problem in our society. It is chasing something that does not exist, assuming and hoping you will find even better.

Empty, sad, and ultimately futile and frustrating. Shame so many from our generation only end up finding that out only on their death bed.

 KAT4EVR
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 263
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/2/2011 4:03:18 AM
sensual...
then you and others are looking at the wrong women, but, then that is why most of us are on here, we cannot break the habit of seeking those who are not the right ones. It is so much harder to look on line than in person,but , a lot of us work jobs that constrain us in our searches. Catch 22.
I am looking for a good man, kind hearted, gentleman and I keep finding ones who are complaining about their exes, have no clue how to be a gentleman or are expecting me to be their-cook, cleaning lady, do windows, work a job and give them the money, not have a life of my own or wait by the phone for them to call me.
Ahhh, I will keep looking, and looking and looking.

 DivineBovine
Joined: 5/13/2005
Msg: 264
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/2/2011 9:40:00 AM

...so many men are rejected outright for simply trying to be decent everyday guys.


and all the decent everyday girls are rejected by men because they aren't "hot".


There is a major problem in our society. It is chasing something that does not exist, assuming and hoping you will find even better.


and men are just as guilty (if not more so) of this.

i've posted this a LOT in the past couple of weeks:

another major dating site makes the stats available for all to see (and from things i've seen Markus post himself, the same stats hold true for this site). the top 1/3 "most beautiful" women (based on photo ratings) receive 2/3 of all the email traffic from men. while the men rated in the middle of the pack receive the most email traffic from women.

in fact, the email traffic to the more attractive men drops off steeply the "better looking" they are rated.
 Pinayto
Joined: 2/5/2011
Msg: 265
What do women want?
Posted: 8/2/2011 9:47:34 AM
Yeah I agree, this question definitely has different answers depending on the woman you ask. Also, just be yourself, eventually someone will love you for what you are as it should be. Pretending to be someone you are not just to get a date won't get you anywhere well in short time maybe but not in the long run.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 266
What do women want?
Posted: 8/2/2011 9:56:25 AM
Someone I like who likes me back and will kiss
me goodnight every night.

ummm...that's about it.

Sounds simple, but it's really not.

 sensualseekerns
Joined: 6/1/2010
Msg: 267
What do women want?
Posted: 8/2/2011 10:17:01 PM

...so many men are rejected outright for simply trying to be decent everyday guys.

and all the decent everyday girls are rejected by men because they aren't "hot".


Hardly the same thing at all, and it is your opinion that is clearly based on your own self-image feelings. As the other poster said, what one finds attractive another does not. That is just the way it works. Taking rejection to heart when the reasons are so different between genders simply feeds anger and resentment to what should be a more clear cut debate.

An obsession with image or "hawtness" does not explain why looks alone are such driving factor over and above decency. Women are guilty of saying they want a decent guy, and then turn around and say all decent guys are liars or wimps. Men do not say they want a loving woman and then turn around and say loving women or decent women are to be avoided because they are all liars.

Honestly how to you expect that kind of thought pattern to be addressed by men?


another major dating site makes the stats available for all to see (and from things i've seen Markus post himself, the same stats hold true for this site). the top 1/3 "most beautiful" women (based on photo ratings) receive 2/3 of all the email traffic from men. while the men rated in the middle of the pack receive the most email traffic from women.

in fact, the email traffic to the more attractive men drops off steeply the "better looking" they are rated.


Actually there have been studies done in the past few years on how women rate themselves versus the other women in the room. They then target the men that they think match their own level of "value" in that study group. What the researchers found was how women view themselves has a big impact on the men they pursue at social gatherings.

I am sure the same study would apply equally well to how women pursue men on web sites.

It is after all the nature of elitism that people are convinced to ascribe to higher merits based on false values. In particular looks, money, and power. That women seem to have primal wiring driving them to all three as a measure of the bar makes them more susceptible to social brainwashing then are men -- who are drawn far more to image alone.

Another side issue to this is how a simple compliment is viewed on line by women. The assumption that it is a come on of some sort or a sign of "he just wants sex" kind of thinking gives men very little room to start even the most basic of conversations. Women on the majority of these forum threads say a man must write a book instead of a letter when attempting communication, and then that book is used to have plenty of information to weed those men out based on the most minor of failings. Men have no such qualms or laundry lists.

The way women on forums say it should be seems to reflect a practice of preparing automatic rejections. Me take the futility approach sometimes and bombard all women on a site thinking at least one will pay some attention. This approach however rarely works in the job search field and more then it works in the dating field, but to many men the practice of increasing the odds of success by what ever means that seem to work is just hardwired.

So to say that it is the same for women as it is for men is misleading. The results may be the same but the factors are MAJORLY different. It is in those factors that the failures are easy to identify if one merely looks between the lines.

 Johnny_from_stony
Joined: 12/18/2010
Msg: 268
What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 2:03:15 AM
Very well put, I agree with everything you said. I also think that most people have a hard time discerning what they think they want and what they really want. People prioritize their wants and if the important ones are there, they think the rest can be worked on. Thus, the saying a out how a woman marries a man in hope to change him. And men hope their wives will never change physically. I think in today's society, women are more independent and require the "breadwinning", "manly" man, less than they did say, 50 yrs ago. Now this leaves alpha males in a difficult situation. On one hand, natural instincts and chemistry make men want to be the physical, powerful, dominant ones, but, now , that women require that less, men are changing to a more submissive role, unsure of their place. Women in their new roles of independence, also believe that the alpha male is something of the past and state that they want more passive, sensitive males. The problem is, we are hard wired to the alpha male scenario and too "civilized" to admit it.
 PopciclePixie
Joined: 12/29/2010
Msg: 269
What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 2:38:44 AM
Yes- in some cases you absolutely should run into the forest screaming or perhaps; tip-toe, so she won't hear your departure and follow you. Good luck and find a great pair of cross country trek shoes before you take off for the hills.
 RoadGhost
Joined: 7/29/2011
Msg: 270
What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 7:08:39 AM
Well, i know what they dont want!
They dont want a Poor, Fat, Ugly, Old Man even if they say "Oh that doesn't matter!"
It does matter, believe me, it does!
Other than the fat part, i've witnessed this phenonmenon in person!
Did i spell ANY of that right?
More experienced women dont like to be TOLD, "Im a nice guy, honest, caring, sincere, hardworking," Noma, noma noma nuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!!

What women really want is a "nice guy" who also "just happens" to be, strong handsome influential, powerful, serious/funny perfect in every way, perfect family great heritage, great inheritance, and especially just happens to be rich and owns a lot of land.
BUT they're not "really" after him cause of that (or the pool.) They just want a man who cares.
 DancingLynn
Joined: 7/13/2010
Msg: 271
What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 3:01:49 PM
Well, like most of the woman who replied to the original (what do women what?) I too believe that most of us want what we want just like all the guys on here state in their profile. We want someone that we are attracted to first and foremost, someone with a job, and or career and someone that is not talking crazy. I have received messages and IM from guys that know better then to message me and then get mad when I don't respond or say thank you but no thanks! We have to realize that all are not going to like what they see or read from everyone so don't take offense if you don't get what you want, just keep trying and the right someone will come along.
 scottishexile2008
Joined: 6/29/2008
Msg: 272
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 4:43:59 PM
women want it all ...but they do not know what they want themselves ...and usually when they have it all its never enough ...its a fact .....they want a cross but mostly of all want want a bad boy so they think they can change him ...nice guys come second they also want ....
1. a provider
2. a man with a steady job ( this is no longer viable in this economy
3. tall
4.handsome
5.hair
6.teeth
7. a man with a bank account
8. a man that will be the father to her kids
9. a man with his own house
10. a man that will do what she says
11.a man that will go shopping with her
12. a man that will fruit up the house and let go of his bachelor stuff

in the ideal world this would be called a gay guy but for the vast majority of men all these things are not possible ....but these are what women want and in return you will gte food and sex ...as long as you keep the 12 above mentioned details ...not necessarily in that order ....
 smlyslly3
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 273
What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 6:40:12 PM
women want respect and trust at least thats what most want out of men.some are all about the looks but im not i have dated them all looks are low on my list.i wanna laugh and have fun go for a walk watch a movie the simple things.
 morta1ez
Joined: 9/3/2009
Msg: 274
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/3/2011 10:18:14 PM

women want respect and trust at least thats what most want out of men.some are all about the looks but im not i have dated them all looks are low on my list.i wanna laugh and have fun go for a walk watch a movie the simple things.


those are both based on actions, if you act like you are in a relationship you get both.
Problem is too many women want to act like a whore during shore leave but expect to be trusted. flirt with other guys and still be trusted, not call for hours or days and wonder why you stop talking to them altogether
 KAT4EVR
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 275
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/4/2011 3:50:41 PM
Well Scot,
You are so wrong unless you are dating women who are in their 20's and early 30's. Those of us with a good job, our own home, and are comfortable in our skin do not want what you listed.
1. provide humor and be able to keep a conversation going with more than yep, uhhuh, ok
2. have a job that pays your bills, mine pays my bills
3. be a good height so we don't tower over you (most of us anyway)
4. be well groomed, if you smell, you don't come any closer, trim that beard and mustache and brush your teeth, also see the dentist
5. hair if you have it should at least be clean and trimmed to what is your style(not greasy or unkempt)
6. yep, either have them and keep them clean or have some decent false teeth, c'mon there are free clinics out there for that
7. don't be on welfare or the dole
8. I don't need a father for my girls they are gown and the second one is getting married next year, the dress is paid for, I paid for it. I am also designing the veil and will help pay for the reception
9. own your home or at least have a nice place to live in, I worked 3 jobs when I was younger and bought my first house when I was a single mom and 23 years old. If I can do it so can someone who has no children.
10. I am not the boss, I am a partner or plan to be
11. You sure don't have to shop with me, stand in the Mall concourse, stay home, I don't care, I hate shopping too, but have to buy food and other essentials.
12. Interesting, a fruity man???? huh? Nope, I love denim, leather, flannel and the smell of shoe polish. If I can clean my leathers in the kitchen or living room, and keep the carpet/floor clean, so can you. I will even help you clean the rifle since I used to hunt.

So, whoever you have been choosing to date, you must not pay attention to their profile or you want the eye candy type that is high maintenance, High maintenance equals problems if you want a "normal" down to earth woman. Quit looking at the top 10% and get over it
 GrandmaBooBoo
Joined: 12/30/2006
Msg: 276
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/4/2011 9:09:36 PM
Hmmmm, I want a short, fat, bald man...with a nice beard and a hairy chest, who can still see to drive at night, has a standing prescription for viagra, who can pay for his own dinner once in a while. I would like him to find my warped sense of humor absolutely delightful, and not get his masculine feathers ruffled because I pay my own way and fix my own stuff. He should have an IQ somewhat higher than a box of dog hair, and not be afraid to "argue" with me. (I love a great argument/debate)

Ummm, that's pretty much the whole list of must haves. LOL! needless to say the must NOT have list is somewhat longer!
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 277
What do women want?
Posted: 8/4/2011 10:48:29 PM
Hi booboo, long time no see!

One would hope by page 14, some basic ground rules would be generally accepted.

The job, a plae to live(not a refrig box under an overpass), generally able to communicate without grunts, in the kitchen something besides spam and a fork 13 chinese menu's and a dozen coupons for Papa John's.

So given that would the ladies please provide, substative traits that they are looking for?
 KAT4EVR
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 278
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/5/2011 3:58:54 AM
Oy, are you trying to throw us off by the substative word? Should it be substantive instead?
Meaning a list of them?
I was answering scottishexile.....he sounds like he does not have a job, no home and dates women in their 20's. On his profile it does say 21 to 53, what a range of ages!
I prefer a man who does not live in a box or railroad car or his own car for that matter.
If you take most of the women's posts, you can come up with a good list.
I am blowing off my class reunion this weekend. The last one had a karaoke singing DJ who could not carry a tune in a bucket and dinner was less than acceptable and for that we paid $35 per person or $65 a couple. I just could not bring myself to going this year, sans date who could at least suffer with me or bring the ear plugs.

But then, I am sure they did not want me to come this year considering that the last one saw me leaving early to go back to my motel room and as I left, I told the hosts that it sucked. They asked why and I answered. The guy didn't even play rock and roll music, he actually played Frank Sinatra songs (what the?). I thought I was at the nursing home with my father again.
I instead, will be kayaking on the river, watching a re-enactment and spending time with my younger daughter and her fiance and about 30 other people in the group. I would like to know when we, who are over 50 became our parents and changed our music likes to the 40's and 50's music??? Nope, not happening here in my little world of Rock and the sound of loud pipes on my 1300cc motorcycle. But, have fun putting the list together and do share it with the other men......
Have a great weekend....I have some 4 x 4 x 8 fence posts to set after I dig the holes for them. Then put the stockade fence sections in place.
 totalazzhole
Joined: 3/27/2011
Msg: 279
What do women want?
Posted: 8/5/2011 7:23:29 AM
so, we have concluded..men must bring:

1. a provider
2. a man with a steady job ( this is no longer viable in this economy
3. tall
4.handsome
5.hair
6.teeth
7. a man with a bank account
8. a man that will be the father to her kids
9. a man with his own house
10. a man that will do what she says
11.a man that will go shopping with her
12. a man that will fruit up the house and let go of his bachelor stuff


and women bring:
a vagina & a pair of breasts..

fair trade?
 4ms4me
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 280
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/5/2011 9:06:04 AM

and women bring:
a vagina & a pair of breasts..

Not sure if you're being facetious, but if that's all a man sees as a woman's contribution to a relationship, its no wonder they end up being (and feeling) used. Such a man is only going to end up with women who are ok with using their girly-bits to gain certain things from him, because a woman who wants to be appreciated for more than her breasts and vagina wouldn't even attempt a relationship with him.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 281
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What do women want?
Posted: 8/5/2011 10:49:02 AM
^^^^^Don't worry. Most of us know very well that's only the beginning. For affection, passion, appreciation, intimacy, acceptance--all those things that really satisfy--the whole person has to be involved.

As for what women want in men, I have a hunch a lot fewer of them really know, than think they know.
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