Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Women in heels...      Home login  
 Della D
Joined: 7/10/2008
Msg: 51
Women in heels...Page 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
At 5.8 I do have a similar situation occasionally.
As I do not date guys who are shorter than I am, my strategy is to at first I go with lower heels if he's not tall, and if he turns out to be confident enough I can step up the heel height (or if he's lacking confidence there would not be many further dates anyways).

In your case, as you have been dating for a while and he explicitly tells you to "wear what you want", just do so, wear these high heels if you want (as long as you are not uncomfortable with towering over him).
 Della D
Joined: 7/10/2008
Msg: 52
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 3:23:36 PM
@ Rhonda: Sorry, I only read your reply after posting my previous post and could not edit it!!!

What kind of sexist company do you work with???? Only hope they do compensate you properly and according to this oppressive dress code, as that whole "high heels, panty hose and tight skirt" biz is a male conspiracy to slow us women down (in the most literal sense).

And no, I'm not one of these 1980's die hard feminists, just do not go for double standards.
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 53
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 4:01:25 PM
Hi Della- Its a real estate investment business run by a bunch of guys in the UK. Yes I'm irked by the women's dress code, being as the men don't have one. I'm told "gentlemen don't need one". But still I have a job, and its secure as long as I obey the rules. Besides, I'm used to it by now.
Joined: 9/28/2011
Msg: 54
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 8:50:54 PM
If a man says where what YOU want, then wear what YOU want to wear.

He obviously doesn't have an issue if you're taller than him in heels. And besides, he might like the vantage point!
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 55
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 9:21:26 PM
I have no problem with it. If wearing heels makes you females comfortable, do it up. If you were wearing it before you met the man, don't let it change because you met a man. Just as much as you let him in, you females can always let him out. Shouldn't have to change for anyone period.
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 56
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 9:58:56 PM
I love dressing up and wearing heels, but I recently severely sprained my ankle (my third bad ankle injury) and I'm not getting any younger, so I think it might be time for me to cultivate a new appreciation for flats. *sigh*
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 57
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/19/2011 10:19:52 PM
Lol.. that's true but they're ugly!!

What am I talking about, so are the sensible boots I just bought, lol..
 Della D
Joined: 7/10/2008
Msg: 58
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/20/2011 4:57:49 AM
@ Rhonda: That must be quite some bunch of (self exclaimed) "gentlemen", LOL.
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 59
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/21/2011 3:46:43 PM
I started wearing heels late in life (in my 50s) and I am not going to stop now. I
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 60
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/21/2011 4:46:16 PM
I've had one guy tell me that he loves that I'm short...because no matter what, I will never be taller then him in heels....

And I've had another guy tell me that he loves when I don't wear heels because I fit snugly by his side.

And...the best one guy was going through his emotional crisis of creating reasons not to be with me long term. Would pull the I could really love you.....but I don't like women under 5' 4.....and we would start laughing at how stupid that is......
A good spin off women saying they only want a guy over 6 feet....especially if they are 5 feet!

Did I mention I'm still single?
Joined: 7/23/2011
Msg: 61
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/21/2011 5:03:31 PM
^^^^ yes u can go out with me..
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 62
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/21/2011 5:07:46 PM

Cute...gas up your leer jet then....because rowing will take forever!
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 63
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/22/2011 2:25:19 PM

You could always say you are 5'11'' and 3/4 to 6'0 1/2 depending on what time of the day it is. And if they are really picky they can date you half the day while you find someone who has a firm grip of reality....
Joined: 1/17/2011
Msg: 64
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/23/2011 9:00:15 AM
Hey Rider, be happy you're that tall - I'm considered a midget at my height !

Joined: 10/9/2011
Msg: 65
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/23/2011 1:04:07 PM
OP- I know exactly how you feel. I tried dating a guy that was an inch shorter than me and felt like I could never wear heels when I was out with him. It was because I felt uncomfortable being about 3 inches taller than him. Of course in the end, this relationship didn't work because I love wearing heels. It just makes me feel sexy.
Joined: 7/16/2011
Msg: 66
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/24/2011 2:17:12 AM
Yes I would never date a man who was not a few inches taller than me and not only because I like to wear heels. I just couldnt handle a shorter guy than me I am only 5ft four inches but still.
Joined: 7/16/2011
Msg: 67
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/24/2011 2:18:30 AM
Yeah I am not going to stop wearing heels when I want to and I just dont go out with shorter men, that is all.

Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 68
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/24/2011 6:55:26 AM
not an option for me. Even if company dress code allowed flats, I'd still wear heels because they show off my legs. Men like that.
Joined: 10/2/2011
Msg: 69
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/27/2011 4:05:49 PM
I have the same issue...nearly 5' 8" and so you add heels and I get tall. If my date isn't nearly 6 foot tall to me it feels awkward- EVEN if he says he doesn't mind. I don't mind if I am in heels and I get close to the same height, but definitely not taller.
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 70
view profile
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/28/2011 9:36:45 AM

Lol.. that's true but they're ugly!! What am I talking about, so are the sensible boots I just bought, lol..

Gals, for the 99.9% of us who aren't shoe fetishists, well, we're not looking at your feet. You can wear bunny slippers for all we care. And height is also something only you are worried about. We like hot women of all sizes. Save your feet, knees and backs. Wear sneakers....and clothes that show off that beautiful body, and your beautiful hair. Heels? Fuggetaboutit.
Joined: 10/16/2011
Msg: 71
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/28/2011 10:01:57 AM

Why do some women torture themselves to try to LOOK taller and walk funny?

I don't tortue myself wearing heels!
They are very bad on your feet.
I have had back surgery and my feet hurt all the time anyway.
I don't even own heels.
I won't buy any either.
Yes, I know that it makes your legs look better, but it doesn't make anything feel better.
When I was younger, I wore them with dresses to go out dancing.
I can't do that anymore.
Sorry guys, if you want a woman to wear heels, find someone else!
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 72
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/28/2011 2:36:02 PM
You having heels on will only put him closer to where he wants to be!
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 73
view profile
Women in heels...
Posted: 10/28/2011 10:15:14 PM
Reading the posts... a lot of the guys on here seem comfy with the idea of taller dates.
It's mostly the women who don't feel good about being taller than their men.

Why is this?
Can this be because a lot of you women, despite all your proclamations on "equality" still are trapped in the old patriarchal ideas that men should still be superior to you? (stronger, better.... taller?)
Look at the language:
"I like to look up to him" (women subordination)

So really, in the end, what most of women still need is someone clearly superior to them --someone they can defer to? The idea that a short man cannot protect you is ridiculous. If that small man happens to be a boxer or a martial artist, he can lay out a mugger in no time.

This idea that men should be larger is an antiquated notion --dating back to the time of the cavemen when size really did matter.
The reasons that you put on here... the it doesn't look good, or you are uncomfortable... or it ain't proper looking... really, those are reasons?
What other valid reasons are there other than "it doesn't look right"? It just doesn't look right because your cavewoman brain tells you
"he can't protect you from the dinosaurs if he's that small".

But this is the modern world now.
There's more than just brute strength in men.
A small skinny Indian toppled the British Empire without firing a single shot.
A short bespectacled nerd now runs the world's computer software.
A guy with no legs climbed mt Everest.
Not to mention...

The modern hand gun has made physical size a moot thing. Your hunky tall boyfriend is useless against a small teenage gangster who wants your wallet.
It's different now. But yet, you do cling to these old ideas like they are still somehow valid.

This obviously changes when the short man is a millionaire of some sort. But then, the idea is the same thing -- you feel you need a man who is clearly your superior in some way. If not height, then wealth, power, etc.

Now, you can read all this and still prefer taller men, sure.
But now that you know the deep reasons WHY you subliminally want taller men... so really, you -----

Oh wait... the only other valid reason to like taller men is that they have longer...

OK, I'll graciously concede that.
Joined: 10/22/2011
Msg: 74
Women in heels...
Posted: 11/4/2011 7:08:30 AM
ThereIsLoveEverywhere, I've dated guys an inch or two shorter than me, but more than anything I just don't like to feel LARGE compared to the person I'm with. I wouldn't even want to be friends with a woman who's significantly shorter than me. I'm very thin but tall, and many years ago I tried to date a guy who was several inches shorter than me and I just felt like an Amazon warrior standing next to him.
Joined: 9/7/2011
Msg: 75
Women in heels...
Posted: 11/4/2011 7:12:06 AM
I know the feeling dear. 5'11" here
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Women in heels...