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 nola3
Joined: 6/9/2010
Msg: 26
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History
Education and datingPage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
As a woman with an advanced degree (MD), I often find it hurts. I had one guy tell me that if he had known I was a physician, he would not have contacted me. I have had more interest in my profile since I removed Doctor from profession & replaced it with healthcare. In this still unfair world, most men will assume I am a nurse .
 someonehere2
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 27
Education and dating
Posted: 8/22/2011 3:12:01 PM
To me, it's just who the woman is and whether I can connect with her. I guess degrees are good, but seriously, going on a date and discussing the 1s and the 1p orbital in Quantum Mechanics, or discussing Stephen Hawking's latest theory dealing with Parallel Universes, it all seems to exhausting for me. So if you have a degree, that's great. But if you don't, it really doesn't matter to me.
 sweetfunfitgirl
Joined: 5/14/2011
Msg: 28
Education and dating
Posted: 8/22/2011 7:51:40 PM
I like guys who are highly educated and/or very creative. I love musicians, writers, artists, etc. I also love guys with PhDs, MDs, teaching degrees etc.

In my experience, people in those two groups are more analytical and think about things more. I like people with their own opinions and I find it in these two groups most often.
 VacationGuy234
Joined: 8/1/2008
Msg: 29
Education and dating
Posted: 8/23/2011 7:07:03 AM

had one guy tell me that if he had known I was a physician, he would not have contacted me.


That is really interesting because(at least from a male doctor point of view), women are supposed to go for doctors. I wonder if it is true that more women go for doctors? Of course, they don't all look like George Clooney, but I will say the profession as a whole has healthier people.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 30
Education and dating
Posted: 8/23/2011 7:26:38 AM
I don't see how having a degree would get those with a degree, better quality dates or even more dates. All it says is that the person is educated.
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 31
Education and dating
Posted: 8/25/2011 4:47:10 PM
luket77

studies show that a person with a college degree will make about 100% more over the course of their lifetime then a person with a high school diploma. unemployment rates are much higher among those that only hold high school diplomas, and the job opportunities are also much more limited. having a college degree also shows that someone has the temerity to commit to something and see it through, which is why so many employers require one these days...all the more reason to get a college degree...
 Flying_Changes
Joined: 6/22/2011
Msg: 32
Education and dating
Posted: 8/25/2011 9:34:33 PM
It's such a tough, undefinable thing, and what drives me crazy about it is that on a dating profile, it's a completely useless piece of information. Really all it does is allow people to make snap judgments they wouldn't make about you in person. Presumptions and stereotypes flow like water. no degree = lazy. dead-end job. even stupid. degree = smart! successful! ambitious!

There's no clear-cut line between the two and no way to tell what the real scoop is, from these profiles. This person might have a high school education, but has built his own business from the ground up and is running a successful company. That girl might have a degree, but only because her parents expected her to go to college after high school, so she picked the nearest state school, majored in communications because it was easy and generic, and now has a boring office job that she doesn't like but hey, it pays the bills, right?

You just don't know. And in online dating, the snap judgments will never stop. It's kind of vicious that way.
 forumjunkie942
Joined: 8/15/2011
Msg: 33
Education and dating
Posted: 8/25/2011 10:23:00 PM
A little surprised that I'm the first to point this out, but having a college degree will likely improve your dating life simply because you have to go and take college courses, usually at some type of college or university, in which case you will likely spend a lot of time around people your own age and get to meet a diverse group of people and it shifts each semester while you are there. I think older reentry students, obviously this is much different.

When you are working full time, you are mostly exposed to people you work with and folks in your industry. So young people out of high school just working, their social network can be limiting.

When you graduate high school and go to college, esp if you go away to college, you are meeting a whole range of new people and hopefully new experiences, you are expanding your social network.

So I would say Yes, going to college will, at minimum, increase your dating opportunities while you are in college.

After college, I think if you are a man, then it is dependent on your earning power. The more you earn, the more dating options you will probably have. There are some correlations with education and earning power, so in so much as for men, I think it might matter. For women? You can be pretty in college or you can be pretty out of college, if you are pretty, men will find a way to find you. If you are ugly, well doesn't matter where you go, but maybe college will help some as it opens up more opportunity.

My observation is people who have similar backgrounds will tend to be more successful in dating than not. So someone who has been to college will likely do better with someone else who has also been to college. Guaranteed? No, but I think having a shared experience will help.

I've known plenty of people with college degrees who were stupid that's for sure. But I've know FAR FAR FAR more people without college degrees who were stupid in comparison. I think a better "gauge" of intelligence would come from how much investment the parents of the person put into that child's socialization and home education, I think that's a far better measure of future reasoning skills and reaching to hit the ceiling of one's mental potential.
 cupcake1955
Joined: 6/6/2011
Msg: 34
Education and dating
Posted: 8/25/2011 10:39:12 PM
Respond to vacation guy....I know for a fact that some men and women narrow down their criteria by bachlors degree or not. I find it has a lot do do with age. The younger require it and the older not so much. It matters to me how much character, intellegence and how well they take care of themselves. So I'd have to say NO. It does not mean you are smarter. Yes, I have been turned down for not having a degree. Dumbasses.
 SingleGuy4912
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 35
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History
Education and dating
Posted: 8/26/2011 4:26:55 AM
Having a degree does not tell you whether someone
- is a good human being or not
- is employed or not
- is employable or not
- is financially stable or not

My observation is that the majority of women prefer equal or greater education while the majority of men prefer equal or less and a smaller percentage don't care either way.

It follows that for men, the more education he has, the larger his dating pool. For women, the more education she has, the smaller her dating pool.
 ChristianWoman35
Joined: 8/17/2011
Msg: 36
Education and dating
Posted: 8/26/2011 8:04:07 AM
I personally prefer to date men with an education, but I would make an allowance for someone that does not have a degree who is successful in their career. I don't think having degrees has helped me or hindered me in meeting people to date. I do think that it has made me choosy. I can’t see me dating someone that is not equal to me in career success, goals and aspirations. I hope to get married someday and I have no intention of being with someone that cannot carry their weight.
 mysterywoman999
Joined: 3/13/2011
Msg: 37
Education and dating
Posted: 8/26/2011 8:05:07 AM
My women friends who have degrees have indicated a clear preference for a man who is also educated. For most of us, though, it is merely a preference, not a deal breaker. I would say about half the men I have dated had degrees and half didn't. They were all intelligent.

IME, men don't seem care that much what a woman does for a living (unless she is unemployed, or a porn star!) so I would have to think they don't care much about the degrees associated with her profession. Of course, this leads me to ponder what I think men DO want or care about? A pretty face, a loving and passionate nature, and the ability to hold an intelligent and/ or interesting conversation would be my guess...
 jpwrnglrwmn_forumsonly
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 38
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 4:19:00 PM
I prefer to date someone who has at least a college degree, but it doesn't mean that I wouldn't consider someone who doesn't have one. As long as they are progressing and going somewhere in their life, and successful and happy in their career, has a good overall character, that's not the deciding factor. I just was stood up today for the first time ever since dating. . by someone who has a graduate degree from Stanford. Drove all the way to the meeting location, had a hard time finding it, called him, he didn't answer either his phone, or my text. Education does not equate to a better person.
 D_Ocean
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 39
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 6:53:39 PM
I would prefer to date someone that has a college degree, or is at least working towards one.

As far as longterm and marriage, I want my spouse to have [or working towards] some sort of a Masters degree, because I know I will be getting my masters in the next 5 or so years.

I've always been attracted to women that are equal to me. I don't care what kind of work my spouse is involved in or the amount of money she makes, as long it's honest work and she is out of the house and working just like me.

You can call me superficial, but most women have some sort of a list, and I have my own. Albeit, it is a short one.
 SharkByte81
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 40
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 6:57:28 PM
I prefer to date people who are educated because its easier to hold a conversation with someone who is close to my level intellectually. I don't mean that to sound like I think I'm all that and a bag of chips. lol I once dated a girl who seemed nice enough online when i was talking to her. We agreed to meet so I went to pick her up and she was a good 45-50 lbs heavier then in her pictures. Well ok, I expected that, she wasn't HUGE but she wasn't thin either so I can deal with it if she's as nice as she seemed online. As the night wore on though I discovered that she had gone to high school one time, decided that her first period teacher "hated her" so she walked out, went home and told her mom she didn't want to go anymore to which her mom replied. "ok". This girl was 23 years old and had the mentality and education of a 9th grader. She didn't finish high school, didn't even get a GED. I on the other hand have a deep interest in science, history and art. I've been around the world more then one time and love learning about other cultures and what not. What am I going to talk about with a 23 year old 9th grader? It would be like me dating a Brain Surgeon. More then likely I would feel about as intelligent to a brain surgeon as that girl did to me...

So no, a college degree doesn't mean squat to me in the dating world but the level of education does tell me if we are likely to be on somewhat similar playing fields. For a 4th or 5th date I might invite a girl to go out stargazing with me and some of my friends and their girlfriends and wives. Its something we do once a month or so and it will usually be me and 2-3 other guys with their significant others setting up telescopes and touring the heavens. If i point my scope towards Saturn, she looks through the scope and has no idea what she is seeing that's probably a bad sign...
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 41
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 7:56:35 PM
i am not sure, but that being said, i do prefer to date men that have a degree.
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 42
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 8:01:38 PM
mystery woman~

"IME, men don't seem care that much what a woman does for a living (unless she is unemployed, or a porn star!) so I would have to think they don't care much about the degrees associated with her profession."

i don't fully agree with this. i have about 5 or 6 male friends that will not date a woman unless she has a successful career and lots of letters after her name. one of them, a doctor, will casually date women that are attractive, etc., but he only seriously dates women who are highly educated and or doctors themselves. i think a lot of male professionals prefer to date women professionals. it's definitely a status thing imo.
 Lolita_LeBron
Joined: 1/12/2011
Msg: 43
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 8:11:53 PM

It would be like me dating a Brain Surgeon. More then likely I would feel about as intelligent to a brain surgeon as that girl did to me...

You are right, although dating up doesn't have to be a hassle for some people. We either get labeled as stuck up or anal retentive. Worse when a person knows that they are at an impasse because of the educational difference and they feel inferior to you. That can be a **** sometimes. But it is their bad, I did something with my life, and nothing should stop them from doing something with theirs.

If i point my scope towards Saturn, she looks through the scope and has no idea what she is seeing that's probably a bad sign..

So, if someone you dated had an interest in stargazing, but has never done it, does that mean that she is not datable? Seems to me that it would be a perfect opportunity to share something that you have a passion for. What is wrong with that?
 infennario
Joined: 5/24/2011
Msg: 44
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 9:09:47 PM

…whether a degree has helped you in your dating life, specifically, online dating only. Has it gotten you better quality dates? Has it gotten you more dates?

When I did searches, I always searched for a bachelor’s degree minimum, and sometimes only advanced degrees. Some men that I met or interacted with mentioned that they viewed my having degrees as an asset.

More or better quality dates? Impossible to tell, and quality of person is not directly related to degrees. I’m pretty sure some men avoided me because of my degrees and some even withdrew because of the specifics of them. Self-selection, so that’s all okay.

The man I’m seeing has formal education through HS. He told me he was hesitant to contact me in part because of my degrees and certain stereotypes. But he's not one to let that stop him, I guess.
 modivin
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 45
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 9:18:11 PM
Higher education.....

In person has made a difference with more dates. Online, no changes.
 BBurlington
Joined: 8/29/2009
Msg: 46
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 10:05:55 PM
Intelligence is a deal breaker for me. I am looking for someone to challenge me . A lady who can hold in own during a conversation and make it interesting. Brains are sexy, super sexy.

Usually intelligence correlates to education. This could lead some looking for degree as a starting point. That being said I have met very educated men and women who were completely inept in social situations. On the flip side I have had in depth meaningful conversations with a friends dad who dropped out of high school and worked as a brick layer his entire life.

If its totally a money issue a degree will be an asset. If its an intelligence issue than you also have to admit that it proves at the very least the intent to better your education.

Between Social Smarts/Book Smarts and IQ/EQ there are many different variables which make up intelligence. A diploma does add value, as it should, but my no means should be a reference point on if you talk to someone or not. Any day of the week I would take a self taught socially confident intelligent woman over a woman who earned a diploma and who's conversation was dry and painful to take part in.
 msinnocuous
Joined: 5/7/2011
Msg: 47
Education and dating
Posted: 10/16/2011 10:30:10 PM
Speaking as a female (not for females), I think my degree status has had mixed results in regards to my dating life. On one hand, I believe it has intimidated individuals I'd be a poor match for anyway. On the other, it hasn't really decreased or increased my amount of responses.

Meh.
 SharkByte81
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 48
Education and dating
Posted: 10/20/2011 12:29:04 AM

So, if someone you dated had an interest in stargazing, but has never done it, does that mean that she is not datable? Seems to me that it would be a perfect opportunity to share something that you have a passion for. What is wrong with that?


You are absolutely correct, it doesn't make her not datable. However Saturn is pretty obvious. I would expect anyone who paid any attention at all in grade school to recognize Saturn in a good scope. In all honesty, if i took a girl out stargazing and she had no idea what it was I was showing her I would take the opportunity to share something I'm passionate about. If i pointed the scope at the Pleiades cluster I wouldn't expect her to have any clue what she was looking at. I would expect an "OHHHH Its so pretty" which I could follow up with the legend of the seven sisters. The Orion nebula turns into the story of the great hunter chasing the great bear (the big dipper is the bears tail) through the heavens for all eternity. Its just a good way to show a girl some amazing sights and tell some stories. The greater majority of what I could show you I wouldn't expect you to recognize.

I would not expect the average girl to be able to tell me the difference between a Porsche and an Aston Martin but i would expect someone with a high school education to be able to recognize a the ringed giant in a high quality telescope
 NobadeeFTW
Joined: 10/20/2011
Msg: 49
Education and dating
Posted: 10/23/2011 10:56:36 AM
Can I be the one who points out the obvious? If they are on here, then their degree is as beneficial to their dating life as every other user on here without one.
 sportsgirl7700
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 50
Education and dating
Posted: 10/23/2011 11:35:53 AM
In my case, my having a Master's degree does not make one difference in "attracting" men online. As far as I know.

I have found that all men care to look at on here are my pictures and don't even bother reading anything on my profile including my education level.

Offline is a different story entirely...
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