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 Ferndok
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 26
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First Meeting QuestionPage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
Okay, we all know you know what they want when they propose that. I am oblivious to why they try it on this kind of site. We all know what they are looking for and we all know that there are sites that concentrate on that specifically, so why ruin it for men that are truly looking for a relationship? That is what I don't get.
 RandomScause
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 27
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 7:27:55 AM
misshoney...I'd offer up champagne in your case! jejeje ------

BoonSaint, you fool!! to a woman of misshoney's calibre, you offer a case of champagne in her case! (Ki ji ji.)

I rest my case.
 ncdamsel
Joined: 10/1/2006
Msg: 28
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 7:31:43 AM
because they are cheap... and stupid!!! is my guess
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 29
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 7:41:31 AM
Even though there are no rules to dating. There ought to be one written in stone. And that is that the first date takes place in a neutral public place. NOT his place. NOT your place. Some people like coffee. I do not. I prefer to have a drink.

If the guy says his place or yours, simply laugh and say, I don't think so. We don't know each other, let's meet at a place with plenty of people. And DON'T meet at a park. That to me sounds even creepy.
 oneofnine
Joined: 7/11/2011
Msg: 30
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 7:54:58 AM
The amount of desperate men on these dating sites makes me laugh :)

It's a red flag when they ask to meet at your place with a bottle of wine..... Shows you what they're really interested in.

Block/delete................. Next.
 brown_eyed_girl_60
Joined: 8/14/2011
Msg: 31
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 4:09:22 PM
Thanks for all the good responses.

It is true that not ALL men are losers or out for one thing only.

I have met some really nice guys and have remained friends with them although I hadn't felt that chemistry.

I also agree that any meeting should take place outside and not in a park. I have always met either at Starbucks or the local diner where I know people.

Just such a shame that the losers make it difficult for the nice ones...and that can include both men and women.
 brown_eyed_girl_60
Joined: 8/14/2011
Msg: 32
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 4:12:08 PM
divinelove,

It is nice to know that if the girl is NOT comfortable with going to your house you will defer to what she wants. It is the right thing to do.

If profiles state "intimate encounter" then I can understand those suggestions.

You may not watch the news or read about the horror stories but they are all around and people talk about it so it's not like it's not real because it is.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 33
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 4:18:11 PM
Why do men suggest a bottle of wine and meeting at your place as a first meeting? This is not just ONE man but a few.


Because they are not vaginally implanted. They are men.


Is that the new "dating protocol"? lol


No, its what these older guys are accustomed to, but with the advent of the internet dating sites , its not the same deal as seeing a woman across the room and going to her place.
So if you find someone on the internet, you meet first, some place public for one hour.

Of course men are interested in "One" thing, at least. Without that primary "One thing", he would not be wasting his time meeting any woman, at all.

Even if he was only after "One thing", this doesn't make him a loser. There are women who , also, just want that "One thing". Just takes more searching.
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 34
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 4:25:13 PM
Just such a shame that the losers make it difficult for the nice ones...and that can include both men and women.



LOLLOLLOL... no it isn't a shame.

"Nice ones" don't get laid, they provide you with their time to listen to you, and go home.
This is the equivalent of a man finding a woman who will just come over , rock his nuts off , and go home, till next time he is in the mood.

Even you agree to this, you said..."I have met some really nice guys and have remained friends with them although I hadn't felt that chemistry. "

"Nice guys" make it difficult on themselves.

 cherryyblossom
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 35
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 5:03:04 PM

Some people like coffee. I do not. I prefer to have a drink.


it seems that based on what i see on this forum, meeting for coffee or drink is the only "good" first date idea, but seriously, many people refuse to do that because they find it boring. I have dated several women in the past few months and we all did things that according to people on this site, are "bad" first date ideas (e.g. movies, dinner, public party). I did not say anything about that because I did not wanted to get turned down without given a chance. All of those dates went without a hitch, though none of those women went beyond 3-4 dates. Perhaps plentyoffish members are not as smart as they think they are.
 RandomScause
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 36
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 10:41:20 PM
The amount of desperate men on these dating sites makes me laugh :)
Quoted attributed to Oneofnine

Oneofnine, thank you, for I am an amount of man, desparate, and you are the first one since I threw myself on this site whom I succeeded in making to laugh.

And by George I had been trying very hard.

Good night, now I can sleep.
 KIWI3nme
Joined: 6/6/2006
Msg: 37
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/22/2011 10:49:25 PM
ill open the door and say THANKS! and go watch titanic or dirty dancing and say CHEERS to my pathetic life and have a date with BOB at 1am.
bbwhahahahha!!!!
 Natgoat
Joined: 3/24/2011
Msg: 38
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 7:53:40 PM
A first meeting should be for coffee or a drink at a bar...to get acquainted...
If things go well...extend it long enough to plan for a Saturday at the lake or park
...or a whole weekend if you choose..!!
The initial problem...
(for myself, anyway)
is getting a Reply from my initial Note of Admiration....
The ~distance-factor~ kills almost _Every_ opportunity!!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 39
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First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:05:21 PM
For no other reason than that they're hoping you'll be naive enough to agree to it. In their eyes, they have nothing to lose by asking, since they're usually only looking to score. I'm sure every 20 women or so, one says yes.

Honestly, a guy who meets a woman online who's inviting him over to her place or trying to get to his house in 10 minutes of talking should be real skeptical.
 shakeitupbaby2012
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 40
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:11:31 PM
OP, your post does come across as naive. There is NO dating protocol.
I have a feeling that you're at least a bit naive and the men sense it and go in for the kill.


Isn't it worse if a girl offers to do that? I've had those offers before......


Not IMO. A guy should want to offer a safe place to meet and date.
Guys are safe from the get-go.
 mysterywoman999
Joined: 3/13/2011
Msg: 41
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:29:13 PM
I've dated quite a few men from this site, and none of them has ever suggested such a thing! Generally, they have been respectful of the fact that a woman's comfort zone will likely be different from a man's. I meet in a public and I drive my own car.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 42
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:44:59 PM
Yeah not my style!

If it were I'd be thinking a bottle of tequila, her place or mine, no difference. All she has to have or bring would be the limes, I've already got the salt, sure she has as well.

Now you have to admit, that was funny!! Hahahahaha!!!

On a more serious note as the ladies parade through saying how digusting this is. The main thought in my mind is at her place OR his, there's no doggie bag to bring home!

Hhahahahaha!!
 Sin_Sational_Lady
Joined: 10/27/2010
Msg: 43
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First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:47:46 PM
I have encountered the same approach.....I have no problem with the wine, but we must meet in a public place....and I will drive myself....some people are crazy..you never let an unknown ( and by that I mean you have only chatted online, the phone, or texted this person) into your home and personal life...before you really know them. Most times online you meet the "representive"...the best foot forward....you dont know the real them.....
Just be careful....and demand respect....make these men stand up and be a man...date you...let you know chilvery isn't dead...demand the best
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 44
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First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 8:55:03 PM
Msg.#1:

No, I have not yet meet a guy who suggest to wine me in my own place....

Perhaps they guys you met are cousins, that they do the same things... Well, it won't be a bad idea for me as long as he is buying the $60.00 bottle of wine and the left over of it I can use it for cooking Cog au vin chicken.
 Bladesmith81801
Joined: 10/30/2010
Msg: 45
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 9:18:05 PM

Why do men suggest a bottle of wine and meeting at your place as a first meeting? This is not just ONE man but a few.

Is that the new "dating protocol"? lol

Not for me...just would like some feedback on that.


As a man, I find that an incredibly crass and offensive suggestion for a first time meeting. Not to mention insanely risky for the lady.
 Twicebakedtaters
Joined: 6/16/2010
Msg: 46
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First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 9:35:05 PM
Anyone who suggests a bottle of wine and a intimate non public location is transparent.
It's a no brainer.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 47
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/24/2011 9:36:38 PM

because they are cheap...

Depends on the wine.

and stupid!!! is my guess

Not if it works.
 brown_eyed_girl_60
Joined: 8/14/2011
Msg: 48
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/25/2011 7:22:04 AM
Haha some of your answers are hilarious!

Honestly I am not naive as I would not truly think times have changed that much not the crassness is amazing.

But thx for all the laughs
 Rain587
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 49
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/25/2011 8:10:53 AM
I saw that in the OP's profile too so now wondering why the question. The men think it's what she wants.....

I had a guy wanting me to meet him and a friend on the river to fish.

I asked what made him think I'll meet up with two strangers in a remote part of the canyon to fish and he said because my profile said I like fishing.
 HerSoulSings
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 50
First Meeting Question
Posted: 8/25/2011 8:32:12 AM
I have had men suggest that to me. I always decline. I see it as tacky and rude. I also see it as laziness on their part.

It happened often enough that I used to have a disclaimer in the First Date section of my profile stating that going to my house or me going to theirs for a "movie" is NOT an option.
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