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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Confused about "You're too old for me" responses from women      Home login  
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 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 401
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from womenPage 17 of 24    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24)
Sorry, but this 62 year old has never lied about her age. I feel blessed to have lived this long. My father died suddenly two months after he turned 62. And I'll never lie about my age.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 402
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/6/2016 6:34:03 PM
Personally, I've never been interested in younger men. The youngest I've dated and formed 'romantic' relationship with was 7 months younger (our birthdays were in the same year). I used to have my upper limit 9 years older and dated a few men 9 yrs older. I selected that number of years based on my mother's age relative to mine. I don't want to date someone closer to my mother's age than to my age.

Arbitrary and capricious? Possibly. But I'm not an executive agency. I'm a free agent and will make my rules how I damn well please, without a comment period.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 403
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 2:33:40 AM

Sorry, but this 62 year old has never lied about her age. I feel blessed to have lived this long. My father died suddenly two months after he turned 62.


May he R.I.P.


And I'll never lie about my age.


My stated age is also my real age, with 43 coming around the corner (an age I don't dread, but welcome),

For the 42 years I have lived so far, I appreciate the experiences I have had...and will continue to appreciate --even the sorrows and trauma, disappointments, extreme fear, mixed in-- because those experiences I gained and carried while traversing the world, allowed me to arrive at the destinations which are my beautiful children, my two best friends, my renewed relationship with my father, my pets, and all of the people who are no longer in my life, in my life in the background, and those whom are no more (and whom I greatly miss).
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 404
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 5:09:33 AM
I had a day off and went to a day time movie recently. The place was full of old couples, and I mean 75 and older .

Don't give up. If you want a companion, keep looking. However, the two most recent "good" couples in their 50s (not a wham bam) that I know were introduced through a mutual friend. As opposed to a place like this.


I think that a lot of people sign up for sites like this with the intention of meeting someone but then get cold feet. "You are too old" is just as good an excuse as any to not go out on a meet or date.
 JaiNai2
Joined: 5/30/2015
Msg: 405
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 6:19:39 AM
It has been my experience that as I have passed the age of 70, IRL works much better for me than dating sites. This is because people I meet during my everyday activities are actually seeing me face to face, as opposed to looking at a still picture and/or judging me by my age. When people say you're too old, without ever meeting in person, they are going by what their idea of "old" may be.

I have dated men as much as 20(or more) years younger, with no problem. Would they have responded to me on a dating site? Probably not. I find that younger men are more compatible sometimes, with my lifestyle. Men my age who are active and young at heart are also attractive to me, but not that easy to find

If someone tells you that you are too old, I wouldn't worry about it. There are still so many who would not judge by age alone, before even meeting.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 406
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 9:17:15 AM
I relate socially (most times) to men who are younger than me, but don't really want to date them. I want to date someone who has the same "historical references" that I do....someone in my age range. But that someone also has to not be "stuck in the past", i.e., romanticizing everything "old" in the past, whether it was good or bad, and complaining about how everything "new" is not nearly as good as "back in the old days." There is good and bad in each decade.....I love furniture from the 1930's....much better than today's styles.....but would I want the medical care available in the 1930's....no....not a chance.

But for me, it's extremely difficult to find someone of a like mind....someone who is open to continual learning.....when people ask me when I "graduated", I always tell them that for me, "school will be in session until the day I die". The body may be somewhat slower, but the mind is clicking right along. Perhaps that is why I enjoy spending time with people in their 20's and 30's.....to learn, and get their "take" on things in the world. I just can't "do" GOMs (grouchy old men).
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 407
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 12:03:51 PM
Wow the 2 ladies who just posted - harvest that DNA! I bet JaiNai can run circles around me "/
The other day at the coffee shop there was a table of GOMs.. I guess because they have no one to stop them and say settle a bit. They hated everything ( except the free coffee refills for seniors) But then an attractive older woman came in and man did they square up :/
Flirting 101 Old school
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 408
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/7/2016 3:25:17 PM
Many of colour have beautiful skin that does not age and that helps a lot.

Now, the thing is, once we hit our seventies will we remember who we dated and their names lol!!! I don't think men in their fifties want women 20 years older. From what I hear they don't want women even in their fifties.. The older woman thing seems to occur with young men looking for the mama is some way, even sub consciously, perhaps or just liking the no commitment sex and learning a few things. This of course is a generalisation. there are exceptions to every rule.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 409
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/8/2016 1:46:06 AM

"school will be in session until the day I die".


I love this.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 410
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/8/2016 1:52:57 AM
I think the older/younger relationships have yielded long-term, happy relationships and those should be seen as the models of abridging generational gaps between the two parties in each of the couples. People have to find what works for _them_, and no amount of controlling how other autonomously date will change this right.
 BeckyHT
Joined: 1/1/2013
Msg: 411
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/9/2016 9:41:38 AM
blacklady, I love your wisdom!

It can be difficult to find someone of a like mind. I often think of it as matching on an IQ level. That 'sounds' awful, doesn't it? I found if I dated someone who 'talked really slow', but was 'normal', I got frustrated. I began to realize that the communication style was important to match on, so that I felt comfortable.

I also found, in my area, that most men were way too conservative. I learned to deal with these guys, and when they get on their soap boxes too much, I just ask them to say something positive about this world. I don't know who teaches these guys to be so negative.
I find that guys say too much about what they've just heard on the radio. And when I go and do research on what they thought they knew, I often found tons of information they should have found out themselves. I've been an instructor at a college, and often when I dated, I felt like I was teaching my date like they were a student. I didn't want it to be this way, but it boils down to talking about expanded viewpoints, listening, and sharing.

They say having a relationship takes effort. Very true, it takes a lot of effort.
 Dragracer428
Joined: 1/1/2012
Msg: 412
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/9/2016 4:47:58 PM


Blacklady1953 wrote
Perhaps that is why I enjoy spending time with people in their 20's and 30's.....to learn, and get their "take" on things in the world.


I work with a group of people mostly 30 and under, they are all engineers, very bright and interested in their work. The interplay of their smarts and my practical experience has been one of the joys of this job.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 413
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/10/2016 3:54:39 AM
Thank you, Becky. I know exactly what you mean about the men in your area being way too conservative. Here, in Central PA, too. Some of the things that come out of their mouths.....I once met a gentleman for coffee who started telling me about his former girlfriends. This is the line that made me excuse myself to go to the ladies room (and run out the door -- luckily the ladies' room was near the front door). He said, "I don't know what's wrong....I am a good guy....my girlfriends got loose and ran away."

I shuddered, picturing some poor woman or women tethered and working very hard to loosen the tethers and run for their lives. I find that many men do not want a "companion".....they want a "captive".
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 414
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/10/2016 5:24:11 AM

He said, "I don't know what's wrong....I am a good guy....my girlfriends got loose and ran away."


It sounds more like a joke than a confession.
 BeckyHT
Joined: 1/1/2013
Msg: 415
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/10/2016 10:56:32 AM


It sounds more like a joke than a confession.


A lot of people don't think about their jokes before they let them out of their mouths.

I found some guys simply don't realize how much of a turnoff they become because they don't hear themselves.

Good communication has to be a two way street. I always think listening is a better virtue then talking too much.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 416
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 3/12/2016 5:50:58 PM
I had never considered that, Dragon. Maybe I was being overly sensitive/paranoid?
 americanbulldog89
Joined: 4/5/2016
Msg: 417
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/11/2016 9:01:22 PM
" Is there some evil magic about the number 60" the OP asks. Wait till you turn 65 bro, you will be eliminated by about 98% of the women on this site. Oh and if you like dogs, don't try to adopt a dog from an animal rescue. Yup when you're over 65 they think you're gonna die within the next year and leave the animal abandoned. I'm glad I didn't come here to find the girl of my dreams. LOL Well I need to go take my pills now along with my Poligrip and Geritol.
At least the women around this town still like me, I can get into plenty of trouble around here.
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 418
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 10:57:52 AM
That's because those of us in animal rescue see the ugly side of an older person adopting a puppy and falling ill or dying. That dog ends up messed up and in the shelter.
My current foster is 11 yrs old and when his owner died, the family dumped him in the shelter.
You have no idea. Happens all the time.
Adopt a senior dog when you're a senior.
 americanbulldog89
Joined: 4/5/2016
Msg: 419
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 11:09:10 AM
Yes of course only seniors leave animals abandoned. Younger people that have to move always take the animal and include them in their plans so that means the millions of unwanted animals in shelters are all there because of senior.


Adopt a senior dog when you're a senior.


And who are you to pass judgment????
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 420
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 12:16:04 PM


That's because those of us in animal rescue see the ugly side of an older person adopting a puppy and falling ill or dying. That dog ends up messed up and in the shelter.
My current foster is 11 yrs old and when his owner died, the family dumped him in the shelter.
You have no idea. Happens all the time.
Adopt a senior dog when you're a senior.


I have worked in animal rescue, for small animals (dogs and cats), and larger animals (horses, etc). I have never seen any potential adopter turned away because of age. Age and infirmity together would be a limiting factor when trying to adopt a horse, but not for a puppy or kitten.


I do think you should make arrangements for your pets, in case of your demise. But this is a wise thing for anyone who has pets to include in their will, be they young or old. My dogs are definitely included in my will.
 call_me_tater
Joined: 12/30/2014
Msg: 421
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 1:34:36 PM
Experience and cold hard facts: Those under 25 and those over 65 are most likely to abandon or surrender animals.
Rescues transport dogs, spay/neuter, vaccinate, microchip, provide medical care and do not want these animals to end up in the same situation again.
Most rescues have less than a 1% return rate.
Most Animal Shelters have a 20% and higher return rate.
Who is better at rehoming the dogs because of stricter policies?

The elderly are not denied for adoption; they are simply pointed towards more appropriate companions.
A seventy year old is not the appropriate owner for a Lab pup who has very different needs than a 7 yr old Shih Tzu.
Average lifespan of a dog is 15 years.

It is about what is best for the animal, not the person.
Most people don't understand the process.
 americanbulldog89
Joined: 4/5/2016
Msg: 422
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 1:54:55 PM
Surprise surprise, well guess what I work in animal rescue as well and I do understand the process. I do mostly transport and a little bit of fostering here and there. Oh and thank you for informing me that I personally made an inappropriate adoption last summer. I adopted a young two-year-old American Bulldog last July from a young family who could not handle her. Called from an ad on Craigslist and they wanted her gone that afternoon.
BTW I'm a former federal auditor so don't throw numbers and statistics and percentages at me until you have some credible sources to back them up. As I said in my last post who you to pass judgment. So if everyone will excuse me this old man feels a heart attack coming on so I need to go find a new home for this young dog that I inappropriately adopted.

My appologies for taking this thread so off-topic, this will be my last post you can have the last word if you want
 PassionateSunnyGal
Joined: 7/23/2015
Msg: 423
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Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 7:50:08 PM
One thing that really pisses me off is when people who claim to have the best interest of a pet want to have a holier than thou attitude--I happen to agree with that "who are you to pass judgement"!!!!

My mom lived to 92, at 70 she was running circles around 50 year olds!!!! To use age to limit anything is wrong, you dont know what someone at any age is capable of accomplishing. I was told at 52 I shouldn't get my MBA cause I'd be too old, but I love the knowledge that I attained and it totally changed my lookout on life.

Someone can have a heart attack and die at 45 or younger, car accidents happen daily that would leave a pet with no home--so how can you justify such a nasty attitude about *senior people?
 NutJob12
Joined: 4/1/2016
Msg: 424
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 7:57:23 PM
I'm 48 and don't want to date older men. I don't care how much money they have, I like them younger. And by younger, I mean up to 7 years. Women out live men, so if you are going to be with an older man, the chances of you being their nurse is very realistic. I prefer to be with someone who is active, sexy and keeps me on my toes. They say age is just a number, but when you get up in your senior years it also carries a liability. Just my opinion.
 americanbulldog89
Joined: 4/5/2016
Msg: 425
Confused about You're too old for me responses from women
Posted: 4/12/2016 8:53:00 PM
Okay well you had your opinion but here's just my opinion. I personally know at least five men who married older women. Two of these guys spend a lot of time running their wives back-and-forth who are undergoing chemo treatment for cancer. One of the wives had both breasts removed. The other one is undergoing cancer treatment and I'm not sure what the circumstances are. About a month ago I was on my way up to our local food pantry where I work as a volunteer. This guy was taking his older wife out of the car and placing her in a wheelchair to wheel her up into the ER. We just looked at each other and said hi. The third guy I know his wife had a massive heart attack in August 2012. He was forced to shut his business down and become her full-time caregiver. The fourth one is my neighbor who lives directly in back of me on the other side of the alley. It was last fall and I was in the kitchen fixing lunch when I looked out the back window and saw her crawling on the ground from the garage towards the house. First I thought she lost something small like a ring. She kept crawling, and then I decided to run out towards the end of the yard through the gate and ask her if she was okay. She said no I cannot get up. Her right leg went out and she is racked with diabetes.
The fifth guy's older wife is a total nutcase in my opinion. She likes change and they move every six months and I'm not exaggerating. This guy's whole life revolves around moving from one place to another. She also has medical problems including bad joints and can't do stairs that well anymore.
Yup you older women are the real deal, can't wait to hook up with mine.
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