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Joined: 4/17/2012
Msg: 146
Dating guys in the military...Page 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I apprieciate happy Single Spirits viewpoint. And I certianly don't intent to change her mind, she's entitled to her views however offensive i may find them. I sure my viewpoint is flawed, as my father was a sergant major in the u.s. airforce and we grew up military and it take a certian kind of sacrifice, heroism, and love of all country ,and honor, that isn't quite definabale, unless you live it. The only thing i can say to those who blame military police and the like for violence in the world, if you were the direct subject of such trauma, you would be the first to call on the legal , police, military system to come save you. The greatest souls are seared with the deepest scars. Give thanks and grace each day you will not have to know what that means.
Joined: 9/17/2012
Msg: 147
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 12/23/2012 9:44:09 AM

while i can appreciate your trying to be honest here... i am disturbed and yeah i kinda take it personally what you said. i agree with the original poster here with that there are a lot of people that hop from girl to girl etc... however there are a lot of good decent respectable men in the military. i think you have just a nack for choosing the wrong ones. i am in the military. 6 years so far. i dont treat women like this. nor do most people i hang around... so your percentages here are extremely skewed jjust from your unfortunate personal experiences. just saying. all i am here for is good quality time with someone who i can have a freakin conversation with... that doesnt just wanna go out and get drunk or whatever. you know all the women on here talk like guys are insane always sending unsoicited nude pics... and yeah thats bad but.... i think you ladies go unnoticed because the crazies of you are are out there... we dont make it our entire profile or judge the rest of the female population from a few sour dates or idiots we happen to run accross online.
Joined: 10/30/2012
Msg: 148
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 12/24/2012 4:34:39 PM
Being a Vet myself I'd like to share a perspective on this subject. I've seen a few women say that their problem with military men is they treat women like trash. When you come back from multiple deployments and every tme a few guys in the unit get robbed blind by their supposed faithful wives you get to the point where all women seem to be like that. My unit had something like a 40% divource rate after our 6th deployment. I've watched friends with tears in their eyes as they explained they could'nt afford a haircut because the wife emptied their house and account. I'm no head shrink but I'd say military men that treat women like crap are doing it as a defensive strike, hurt her first before I get hurt kinda thing.
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 149
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 3:52:28 AM

I just messaged a woman and the initial reply was positive. On the second message she asked if I was in the military because on my profile I put something to the matter that I have done some extensive travel on the governments dime. I replied that I was in the Marines, and an Afghanistan and Iraq vet, and out of that scene never to return. No message back and blocked just because of a simple answer. I can say being a veteran is the biggest hurdle for me in the dating world. I thought (still do) I was doing something positive for the people of this nation and of those abroad, but never in my wildest imagination that I thought it would hurt my social life. I feel that I am being judged more harshly than a person who has cheated, and my loyalty and honor is always questioned. This is not the only time; it is a common trend now for me.

I had the same issue many times. I mean, I did 2 deployments to Afghanistan, worked my ass off, finally busted myself up by falling off a trailer while pushing some toughboxes off it, and busting up my right legs, and hurting my back. Did a total of 4 years and a half. I had a blast while I was there and have some very close friends still in. i'm starting school in Sept. I had a gf the last deployment, and she was screwing someone else while I was gone. Luckily, we didn't live together, so it was easier to get rid of her. The ironic thing was that she was screwing some hipster, wanna-be hippy d-bag. Can't stand hipsters or yuppies. lol Aside from that, met many gals, yet only spoke to two once they found out I was a vet. A couple did want to hook up for benefits, but hell no! lol

It is bittersweet seeing the people (most who have never served) in the streets cheering when Bin Laden was taken out, yet in society our veterans are being treated by crap. I remember coming home and going to a supermarket in San Diego; when I got out there was a note on my car that read, "thanks for serving for a lie!" They only knew because of the DoD decal on my car. I have done a lot for the community that I live in, in San Diego. I spent at least a couple grand of my deployment money on blankets for the homeless (which most in SD are veterans), then I go abroad to eradicate an oppressive enemy, build schools and shops, food and medical aid to providing security. There are many Americans who haven't lifted a finger to do something to better their community or country. People need to stop judging us negatively and realize that being in the military is not our whole life.

That is why I have a big disdain towards hipsters. I had a couple of hipster chicks call me and a fellow marine coming home to L.A. for R&R "babykillers". I told one of them to have fun taking care of her pothead bf without a job, at least I have one. lol They got mad and left. A couple of days later, I had one come up to me on a train going to Pasadena and started to talk about what a "bad" person I was for fighting in Afghanistan. well, he almost got his face beaten in, not because I wanted to be a**** but because****eads like him don't know what is like to lose a friend in battle. They don't know how messed up it is to try and help someone whose legs have been blown off. They don't know how messed up one gets when you are rushing an Afghan child who was hit by shrapnel after one of his own countrymen decided to blow themselves up in a busy bazaar. None of the people who wrote negative about the military on this topic know shit!!! All I saw was meaningless hipster banter. If ya'll want to go help all nations, then create a multinational utopia. Other than that, there are such organizations like NATO, the UN, and ISAF, who are many nations fighting in that country, and many others. that guy that kept saying that the military is all about national pride, you are wrong dude! None of the time I have done, from Basic training, on to the time I left have pushed God Bless America, We are the U.S., we are the shit! type of attitudes upon any of us. We volunteered, did our jobs, and came back and worked some more. Whoever thinks that all jobs in the military=killing, are morons.
Joined: 6/21/2012
Msg: 150
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 7:45:16 AM
Thank you for you service! As a veteran and former military spouse, I would not have a problem dating a military man. But with that being said it takes a very special person to be able to put up with long deployments, separations and all the other commitments that military life has. Do not react to the negativity and ignorance that some espouse about your career. People have their preferences and prejudices. I think the military is just a microcosm of the whole world and you will find both good and bad people serving just as in any other job . But please understand that your job does come with significantly higher risks than most (i.e. mortality, PTSD, etc.) Some people can handle it and some cannot. What about dating a military woman? Are they not good enough for you? At least they have some understanding of the military life and risks involved. You may get lucky and find that diamond in the rough disguised as a lump of coal. (or in this instance , perhaps camouflage and helmet hair......:D) Good luck!
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 151
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 11:30:45 AM
Have dated a couple of gals that are in the service, but it just didn't pan out.
Joined: 1/10/2009
Msg: 152
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 11:41:12 AM
love military guy. women feel protected .
Joined: 6/21/2012
Msg: 153
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 12:52:21 PM
Have dated a couple of gals that are in the service, but it just didn't pan out.

So you have dated military gals and it did not pan out...well that is not much different from dating the non-military gals is it? That just tells me you haven't met the right one and to keep looking. The common denominator in all this is you.
Joined: 5/4/2012
Msg: 154
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 7/27/2013 3:31:19 PM
most military profiles are fake that could be part of it.
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 155
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Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 8/7/2013 1:34:56 AM
Original question

I just wanted to see what the ladies on this site think about this topic. I am in the army and am currently deployed. I am going to re-enlist for 5 more years and see what happens. So far, I've gotten the cold shoulder on this site, but I'm guessing it's more because I'm deployed, or gals think that military guys are jerks, or for whatever reasons. Ladies, what is your take on this subject?

People join the army for many reasons. Many of them are fantastic men and I don’t believe in generalizations. However, since OP wanted to know what every ones take is on this, I’d like share mine.

I don’t believe in killing and my preference is to date someone who does not limit defending people by nationality. Because of this, even though I respect their decision, I am simply not attracted to anyone and I mean anyone (friend or lover) who choses to join the army. My intention is not to offend anyone but this is my take.
Joined: 6/21/2017
Msg: 156
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/24/2017 5:04:28 PM
I totally agree...never again would I go near an ex Militery man again here...I had my heart broken by one too, compulsive liar and a cheaty.
Another who was slimey as hell
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 157
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Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/24/2017 5:18:28 PM
[[ HOWEVER, from what I've seen military men are dishonorable men when it comes to treating women, their flat out pigs. They hop from one girl and go through them like paper!!

The sad thing is that it's true for the most part, but there are a lot of guys like me that are not jerks or treat women like trash. I've noticed a lot of what you say though, and it just screws it up for the good guys in the uniformed services. Anyway, thanks again for your input. ]]

I did ten years in the Navy 79-89. While there are number of men who were "players" just as many were great dating prospects.
Good luck OP in your search.
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 158
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/25/2017 7:41:05 AM
I dated a woman was formerly in the military. I never had any problems with her in regards to her military background. There are good and bad people in every profession and background. That being said, it can be harder dating an active member of the military because of the distance.
Joined: 7/28/2016
Msg: 159
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/25/2017 11:52:40 AM
At my age the number of active military is pretty limited. I shy away from any profiles claiming to be active military due to the number of scammers that use that angle. As for past military, its hit or miss. I don't think you can use the blanket statement that they are all bad or womanizers. I know some great ones, I've known some dogs.
Joined: 2/26/2014
Msg: 160
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/26/2017 9:41:29 PM
i have no problem dating men in the military. I don't think being in the military makes you a jerk.
Joined: 9/6/2011
Msg: 161
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/28/2017 8:55:25 PM
Although I definitely take time to appreciate and evaluate the whole person (not just one aspect)...and I know that identical uniforms don't mean you're all the same on the inside..military experience usually brings bonus points.

I can think of a few vets I've met, especially older ones, who had some traits I've come to see as VERY desireable in a partner

1. Grit (they stick with challenges, don't abandon co-workers/friends/loved-ones during hard times)
2. Discipline (they can make smarter, consistent decisions that create better outcomes)
3. Calmness (after being in life/death situations, office pettiness and ridiculousness doesn't get them down)
4. Appreciation for life (they're happy for each day)
5. Competence (they know how to do cool stuff like read map/compass and hand-to-hand combat and stuff. What can I say? It's attractive!)

My guess is that women are hesitant to start a long-distant relationship; they want to enjoy a guy's presence closer to home. I don't think most women would assume you were a jerk or bad guy or anything like that!

Good luck, stay safe! @___@ Aaaah, this makes me miss my buddy in Afghanistan. I know a lot of you guys look all tough and scary, but you're good people. Take care!
Joined: 3/11/2017
Msg: 162
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Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 10/29/2017 8:20:51 AM
My experience with military guys is very negative. All the ones I chatted to were scammers. Actually, I don't even think they were really military guys, but just people posing. Only one I actually chatted and chatted for months, after he gave me the story of being stuck in the same bag as scammers. And saying he was a priest, ended up by being like the others and request money. And they get angry if I say I haven't got it, or just can't. Very sad
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 163
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 11/1/2017 10:51:30 AM
I heard Karma gives military discounts
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 164
view profile
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 11/6/2017 5:10:05 AM
A lot of women won't date military men because they have had bad experiences with control freaks.
Joined: 12/18/2016
Msg: 165
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 11/18/2017 7:16:26 PM
I actually have always preferred military guys but now, not so much. Reason being, they move around too much. I have no plans to follow a man anywhere and I don't want to get involved with someone just for him to get orders to move away. Plus it seems like they want to move really fast. I have no idea what their hurry is but they go from liking to "let's get married" within 90 days. Pass. Not about to be stuck with a man just because he wanted some BAH and off post housing.
Joined: 5/25/2014
Msg: 166
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 12/22/2017 9:24:33 PM
Well first let me say you sound like a nice guy, "but, I too would not date a military guy". I was married to a military man for 20 years. He destroyed his first marriage and family, then years later married me and destroyed our marriage. There are way to many personal issues that I could tell you about this guy. Seems like he just couldn't get it right. But, we divorced and he went on married another woman. His attitude about his service to our country was more an entitlement. He wanted full military service when he passes away. I don't think he deserves it. When you destroy the people of the country you serve, you aren't a hero in my book. But, I realize just like any place that men hide behind their accomplishment of just being there. I want to believe that there are good guys with you....all I see are men who are running away from home. Or wanting to get their benefits and collage paid for. Hope I'm wrong....the real hero's are here, working and taking care of their family and wife. War is wrong, and the government is wrong for taking our young people there. I dream of a time when we no longer have to do that.
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 167
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Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 12/23/2017 10:38:21 AM

But, I realize just like any place that men hide behind their accomplishment of just being there. I want to believe that there are good guys with you....all I see are men who are running away from home. Or wanting to get their benefits and collage paid for. Hope I'm wrong....the real hero's are here, working and taking care of their family and wife. War is wrong, and the government is wrong for taking our young people there. I dream of a time when we no longer have to do that.

Holaks, you have my sympathy for your bad experience. But I have to take exception to you knocking all of the men and women who serve our country just because of your own bad experience. I salute those who serve, and thank them for their service.

War is not always wrong. Certainly it sometimes can be. I do believe Vietnam was the wrong war, the wrong place, for the wrong reasons. But my father served in WW2, and that was NOT wrong. Until we live in a utopian society, someone has to stand between us and the really nasty people out there who wish to do us harm.

Added on edit: And besides, if it wasn’t for the military, were would TrustInKarma find all of those beautiful, ripped young men that she likes to date?

(Inside joke, you have to have been around these forums for years to get it.)
Joined: 10/29/2017
Msg: 168
Dating guys in the military...
Posted: 12/27/2017 11:32:30 AM
I respect people in the military. However I'm not interested in dating a man that I wouldn't see often due to his job. That is not limited to the military.
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