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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Should i be insulted? Would you be?      Home login  
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 PurpleFusias
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 180
Should i be insulted? Would you be?Page 9 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
===whatever the term is GIVE AND TAKE , RETURNING FAVORS,SHARING" attachment's/relationship's responsibilities" TO PUT ON THE TABLE .... He has to lend me first the $100.00 then I'll lend him the $100.00 and we are fair and even......===

So, you can share if that person shared with you first?

And you didn't answer my question; why would you assume that a man who has taken you out and paid for you to have meals and whatever else he may have done with you viewed you as a cash cow because he asked to borrow some money?
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 181
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Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/16/2011 8:00:27 AM
My answered to you is never tell your predicament to your date or any man whether you dated him 6 months or 12 months that "your rent is late or your car is going to repossessed or you having nothing to eat ,it is not his responsibility why you are in BAD LUCK or your family.. God gave you 2 brains one on top of your head and one between your legs.. You have 2 choices which one you want to use the logical brain or the orgasm brain when dealing with a man.... When a woman use her logical brain she is in the good side of a man , and man assess her as a keeper, but when she uses her brain between her legs ,pretty soon she'll be singing the blues that men are j erk, bad , b astard %&*()...... tut tut she is on the bad side of the man...


<div class="quote"> So, you can share if that person share with you first ?

YES!! unless he is a CHARITY case I am more than happy to donate money for him and deduct it from my tax...

Yes I will think that he viewed me as a cash cow if he wants to borrow money from me ,unless I told him that I own a bank that I am in a business of loaning money for people for the rate of 25 %...
I would consider that a man who borrows money from his date or girlfriend or nieghbor or co worker is a weak person, you could say a lowly parasite.

Here is a kicker,>>>> When I was your age 22 starving as an actress/ dancer ,I work hard not to be in debt with anyone specially a man,who would phuck you as a sport prey..
And I believe that if a wo/ man save your ass financially they own your soul,even you pay them already... So better borrow from ligit like the Bank or a credit card and your dignity is intact ,people respect you for that..............

Vannili, The Wise Old Woman....
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 182
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Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/16/2011 8:14:38 AM
Why would you be insulted OP???? You asked for the money, from a relationship, and if they need to clear their head about why you would do that.......you have no one to blame but yourself!.......

Let me tell you what usually is the "real" part of this story for far to many. Let me guess, you more than likely drink, smoke, do drugs, or have an addiction in some form that takes some of the money you need for you every day living needs. You more than likely borrowed from relatives and friends before, either not paid them back or was late with that payment, and now they hesitate to loan you any, or will not consider it.

So, now you are hitting on your girlfriend to help, because you have no where to go, and she cares enough about you to do it, BUT she is not feeling good about the whole situation. Maybe that is why she had to step back and think this through and weigh the pro's and con's of being with someone that can not support himself day in and day out, and take care of all his responsibilities. And you are feeling insulted??

For those of us that have been put in that situation of loaning money to others, for many reasons, it is bad enough to be asked, but to not be paid back on time, and see that person drink and smoke their money, or use it for things not necessary, while we go unpaid, is just plain relationship abuse.

Those that have a relationship with another, or are close friends and/or family, will "offer" to help if right and they can, and to be asked should be the last resort and the first on your list to pay back and never do it again.

cd........
 kinley68
Joined: 8/4/2011
Msg: 183
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/16/2011 9:21:26 PM
If you were insulted, I guess you have a right to your feelings. But since you've asked...No, I don't think you should be insulted. She was being honest with you and it could not have been easy for her. If someone I had been dating for 6 months asked me for a loan, I would see this as a huge red flag, and would take a step or two back as well to re-evaluate the relationship. If you think that borrowing money from her is justified because you've paid for several dates, I disagree. You are not married, your finances are not inter-mingled - and they shouldn't be. Paying for dates (dinner, movies...) DOES not suggest that the two of you are now economically joined and financially responsible for each other. You seem like a good guy, I mean no offense. But, perhaps you should think twice before you ask to borrow money from a woman you've only dated for 6 months and are truly interested in.
 carino12
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 184
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/16/2011 11:53:40 PM
ok ppl, really. he borrowed money so what. If she didn't want to she didn't have to loan it. I don't think his questioning has to do with whether or not he loaned her money and was she upset about borrowing it to him. His question was, she waited so long to contact him after borrowing him the money and says thank you for the space. Personally, if it was me and i loaned a guy money, i deffinately wouldn't need space. i would keep contact everyday making sure i would get money back, not nagging him but, keep track. Here is the real issue, she thanked him for the space....really a girl doesn't borrow a guy money then need space. what she really was doing was stepping out..dating someone else and seeing where that went. didn't work so she contacts this guy she loaned money to thanking for space...please. lets be real. no need to harrass a guy cuz he was short for rent. you are all hating on him cuz he borrowed money. shame on you. he was on here explaining and being honest, forgetting his pride in having to ask for help and all you guys can do his badger and hate on him. shame shame
 cedar77
Joined: 7/17/2006
Msg: 185
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Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 12:49:50 AM
please. lets be real. no need to harrass a guy cuz he was short for rent. you are all hating on him cuz he borrowed money. shame on you. he was on here explaining and being honest, forgetting his pride in having to ask for help and all you guys can do his badger and hate on him. shame shame


Exactly .

She was dating the guy for 6 MONTHS ! She must have at least liked him a bit . If you are too cheap to help out someone with a loan ( not a gift ! ) for a lousey 100 bucks to someone that you like and who you are seeing then you are one cheap cold b*tch and not good for any sort of relationship .
He had probably spent many times that on their dates !

And here people put on their profiles " friends first " Yeah some friends they would be !

People on the forums just like to play holier than thou , and they just love to get themselves all righteous and riled up for the stupidest things that they like to twist to suit their b.s.
I guarantee that most every woman who said that the poor guy should be jilted would lend a guy in a similar circumstance 100 bucks if he were " a hottie " .

Carry on with the b.s. people ,

ps.
I guess I am sort of one of them too , I just got riled for the stupidest thing . lol
 dwarlord
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 186
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 4:09:45 AM
OP, you might want to concider going back to family court and having your child support evaluated again, unless you are living beyond your means.
Most people should know in this time and age child support can be a killer on anyones financial situation.

This is a two people working to pay the bills society for most people who work for minimum wage. Gone are the days when every man use to work and be able to support a family.

She really does care for you OP, hang on to her because she does love and respect you. Tell me where I can find a woman like that.
 Trent12345678
Joined: 8/22/2011
Msg: 187
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 4:46:20 AM
OP - this is NINE PAGES of answers....you obviously have a talent for asking questions that drive the other humans to want to answer you.

I'd write a whole book of questions. Sell it. Then never have to ask for a lousy $100 again.
 Beez243
Joined: 2/26/2011
Msg: 188
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 2:18:48 PM
Well.he has an attitude about everything. She should do this....that...blah blah....get over yourself.
 Caringheart2011
Joined: 4/28/2011
Msg: 189
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 3:29:30 PM
No Kidding?
So let me see ?
You are divorced ," Profile", You are now in a relationship with a chick, you barrow money from her. YET, you are still on POF ?
What for ?
The Forums ?
Again and again, when a man is a man, and get into a relationship, he should at least post : "Not looking, or hide his profile ."
It show respect for the chick you are having sex with. " Dating ?", if that is what you call it ?
Come here, and whine about it ?
Please , give me a break.
And you are wondering why she want to take her distance ?
Bud, if I was a woman, I kick you to the curb faster then a New York minute .
 kensan88
Joined: 9/10/2010
Msg: 190
Should i be insulted? Would you be?
Posted: 9/17/2011 8:06:40 PM
nothing wrong with borrowing money,they dont borrow from us they take,hey we all need help sometimes just do your best
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