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 cin____dy
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 98
lack of desire for a relationshipPage 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I think it can vary with people. Often we need time to heal after a break up others don't. Sometimes a break up affects us more than we thought and takes much longer to get back on the track again. Some people have the great need to go from one person immediately to another, others need time.
Low sex drive can be physical but also emotional healing time needed. One can't say how long it takes to be ready again. If it continues for too long that you are worried about it, you should seek medical advice and see if physical problem if not then reflect on if maybe you are just not ready to take a chance yet and open up.

We all have times we shut down and put up protective walls. Usually it is that which diminshes sexual drive, but all things need to be looked at.
Can be stress of job, or children, or self esteem, as example. Can be depression you aren't aware of. All those things can diminish sex drive.
 infiniteperfection
Joined: 9/1/2011
Msg: 99
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/24/2011 11:07:24 PM
Yes Philosophical discussion is a rare thing to find in the world. You might be attracted to these ideas, and they can become the main focus in your life. The more you desire these "ideas" the more your life will attract persons to you that bring you this information. However you can spend an enormous amount of time sifting through every topic. And what you really want is something that can change your psyche quickly and rapidly. To make you instantly silent and deep as the ocean. This comes about as soon as you stop your thoughts. Which is a form of addiction and difficult to do.

If you are interested in these ideas, I would suggest you read "The Fourth Way" by Ouspensky. And continue to stop your thought.
 cin____dy
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 100
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 1:37:17 AM
Just to add-- I am a political and legal geek, also on humanitarian issues and I find most will not even mention those things. I think how we think of those issues can tell you a lot about how people see the world and who they are on the inside. Find out pretty quick their personalities when those issues are discussed.
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 101
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 2:32:52 AM
get a library card, or an amazon gift card.
The only true romance out there is in the books. Real life is messy - pedantic - full of agenda and too many hidden motivations.
Stop by the travel section - plus up on your foreign languages
Travel
Go Live a life.
You will find a 'relationship' is less important than a life -.... and that is usually about the time a great girl shows up.
 complete_moron
Joined: 6/4/2011
Msg: 102
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 5:38:32 PM

get a library card, or an amazon gift card.
The only true romance out there is in the books. Real life is messy - pedantic - full of agenda and too many hidden motivations.
Stop by the travel section - plus up on your foreign languages
Travel
Go Live a life.
You will find a 'relationship' is less important than a life -.... and that is usually about the time a great girl shows up.


I speak 3 languages, I've been around the world a bit , English is my 2nd.
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 103
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 10:55:49 PM
There are natural ways to ramp up your testosterone. Look in to that. Healthy lifestyle also a major contributor... like sleeping. that. I'm not doing.
 professorjjd
Joined: 3/26/2009
Msg: 104
view profile
History
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 11:25:04 PM
I suspect ilovehistory and I may be in the same boat, or at least swimming in similiar waters! I haven't dated in years and years, and at this point, I am done with dating and/or relationships. I truly enjoy my quiet time.. Of course, my situation is quite unique, since I've NEVER had a really close relationship! I had no one in my family I was close to at all, and both my mother and I despised each other! I have NO siblings, brothers or sisters, and none of the family had kids but my mother.. So I have no cousins.. And now, I am the last one alive! In the few sexual relations I've had, none were that close, it was lust, not love I suppose.. So perhaps I'm the end result of a life lived alone? However, I am NOT bitter, and I enjoy my time alone.. When I was younger I felt more of a need to be with someone, but not much of a need.. Like I said, it was always based on lust.. Of course, my sexuality is still here, and is stronger now then when I was in my 20's, but thats what they make the internet for right? All the free porn a man could ever want! So, my conclusion is relationships are for the needy, the church, and so certain people can feel better about themselves by saying they have a "hot" girlfriend or wife! For me, they have no use whatsoever!
 chinadol6977
Joined: 6/24/2011
Msg: 105
view profile
History
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/25/2011 11:36:07 PM
Yes...I think that most people do at one time or another...
 inyuman
Joined: 5/31/2009
Msg: 106
lack of desire for a relationship
Posted: 9/26/2011 2:17:54 AM
Along with stress there seems to be a huge 40+ female population whose kids are 18+ and the ladies are fired up, not to do the 20's drinking thing but to peak with and that is for some a shock - recall the 80's (later) when aids was causing hysteria..? Now there is too much availability for a guy who is used too long term and its this odd overage now - flipped over 20 years ago the was question of kissing being a killer - we we supposed to be at our peak then...... look how many guys are saying thier peak is now in thier 40s. Worn down with 3x a days worth of drive that will be taken whole heartedly. I think its a post testosterone hangover, a survival switch awaiting a supplimental!
I bring spirituality into my mix as well....
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