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 beehearnow
Joined: 9/28/2007
Msg: 26
If you were dating a woman and this happenedPage 2 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Listen to Tall...

It sounds like a big, huge mess and it's only going to get worse if you keep picking at it. Let her think about what happened and what is what.
 polarbear9
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 27
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 7:24:35 PM
I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 28
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 7:29:09 PM

Now, we are getting an idea of just why her attitude may have been changing..


Yeah...cause she was busted big time. He wasn't smothering her...he was verifying his justified suspicions. It's her job, Tall, to play the diversion of the blame game. I'm sure that will be the next step.


Then call her and see how she is doing, once...


Jesus man...between the two of you...you'll have HIM begging for forgiveness.

Follow the bouncing ball...

"Don't come over...I'm studying"......NOPE she makes plan with other guy for sex

"Oh...I'm not home...I went out for a couple of drinks...impromptu"...NOPE I'm closin' down the bars with dude

"Oh...you're at my house and I'm not there...I was too drunk to drive...Don't wait for me" ...NOPE...I can't explain my bed head, bright post sex glow and the funk of sex.
 WalksOnWater2
Joined: 5/19/2009
Msg: 29
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 7:52:22 PM
Geesus Mister, can't you see that everyone is trying to tell you GENTLY that your missus most likely had sex with her ex?
That's what everyone thinks including you, but you are hoping that it is otherwise.

We don't know. We were not there, and we heard nothing, saw nothing. Ask her. She lied once about studying, she might lie again to make you feel better.

Good luck with this trust building business....

 lilaflower912
Joined: 6/26/2011
Msg: 30
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:03:40 PM
Yep, seems like she was sleeping with her ex. I know you were hoping that everyone would say something different, but that's not the case. If the math is there, it adds up. I agree with some other posters, leave her be and let her come to you and tell you the truth. The number of times you guys had sex each week it TOTALLY irrelevent to determine if she was cheating or not, sorry to say...
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 31
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:08:10 PM

I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me.

And I'm sure that would still be true if you included your girfriend in the list.
 scottey63
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 32
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History
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:23:03 PM
I wouldn't be dating her anymore, that's what.

It doesn't matter if she did him or not (she probably did, though). She lied. 'Nuf said.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 33
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:48:26 PM

I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me


Would you bet your life nothing happened?

If she lied about being home studying, then it stands to reason that she would also lie about nothing happening. Relationships are built on trust, and she proved she can't be trusted. I'd drop her like a rock.
 mrmisterme
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 34
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History
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:54:59 PM

I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me


That's because you don't want to believe that something happened. Heck, you're emotionally involved, we're not (since we don't know you or her). We can look at it and tell you without prejudice what happened with a 98% guarantee that we're right.
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 35
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 8:58:10 PM
what do i think ?

the same as you do.

that she screwed the hell outta this boy who is a former lover/flame...

she wanted this other dude really bad and he happened to want to spend a little time with her,

doesn't matter if they never do another thing together.

this girl was really only screwing you cuz you were around and she was horny.

but with this other guy ?

she is in love with him..



and ya, she did more things with HIM than she did with you...


sorrry man.


do not discuss anything with her.

never call her again.

never accept her calls

do NOT whine to her or allow her to explain herself back to you since she'll feel ''bad'' maybe for a minute later on and wanna apologize to you.

do NOT let her apologize to you cuz she doesn't mean it.


go back and review yourself and how you saw what you wanted to see with her that never truly was there in the first place..

then recognize this next time when you are with a woman and act accordingly.

you are a man...

remember that.


I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me


no, you are begging yourself and others for a reason to stay with this girl cuz she rocked your world.

you are acting like a woman and its not attractive at all...



listen - i stayed the night at my ex wife's family's house when I was dating a new girl post divorce once (kids at the time were in another state with her at her parents house)..

i was up front with my gf at the time and told her what was going to happen (it was a cost thing) and where I was staying, etc...

i told her the truth...i told her I had no desire to have sex with the ex wife cuz i had her.

I was a bit naive about the situation, BUT I still told the new gf the truth and was up front.

I never dodged her calls, nothing.

did she get jealous ?

sure of course.

was she upset ?

of course she was.

did I ever cheat on her by bedding my ex wife ?

no, I did not and she knew that...

why ?

because I did not lie to her about the situation...

 carelesswhisper00
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 36
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 9:14:21 PM
OP, from the information you have provided I believe she spent the night with him and had sex like a wildcat with him. She drove the distance, over drank, then doesn't drive back home....which is a good thing if she was really inebriated, but I bet you she managed to bang him for sure. Sorry
 Toasty120
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 37
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 9:58:24 PM
<---- Running over to WHACK YOU ON THE HEAD!!!!!!
 SweetLady95
Joined: 8/30/2011
Msg: 38
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 10:01:49 PM
Yes, she slept with him. You should just move on from her. Trust me this is not the last time you will have an issue between her and this guy. Think about it. This guy has so much "swag" that he can get her to stop studying, leave her house in the middle of the night and drive 30 miles to his house. Then gets her drunk to the point where she didn't even bother coming home til the next morning. This guy is always going to be a problem for you.
 AintNoDeal
Joined: 2/3/2010
Msg: 39
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/11/2011 10:06:43 PM

sex 4 times a week


Well...good detective work, you found her man for Thursday! Now double-down and find the guys for Friday and Saturday, and you'll know her weekly schedule.

Work you memory and it will all become clear -- the extra men's briefs in the wash, the half-eaten italian sausage rolls, that AXE deoderant she "bought for you" that was already open and half-used....

....you will piece it all together.
 polarbear9
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 40
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 12:31:55 AM
Thanks to everyone for their insight, your all right, time to slowly move
 Kitten189
Joined: 5/25/2011
Msg: 41
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 2:25:59 AM

I belive nothing happened, but If I stayed at a womans house especially someone I had sex with before, something would happen that night.


^^^^ Taken from your Opening Post.
So..............im wondering why you're questioning your girlfriend when you're openly admitting that YOU would sleep with an ex given the same circumstances
 Wrenchturner
Joined: 7/30/2011
Msg: 42
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 3:33:00 AM
Yup, she slept with him.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 43
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History
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 3:37:15 AM
First red flag was she was still in contact with this guy. She had inappropriate behavior and boundaries. A pattern of lying is absolutely unacceptable. I doubt that she will take any personal responsibility/accountability in this matter. Every red flag is there, but you're in denial (not a river in Egypt)!
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 44
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 4:35:53 AM

So..............im wondering why you're questioning your girlfriend when you're openly admitting that YOU would sleep with an ex given the same circumstances

Probably the same reason I would and most other people would - we would never put ourselves in those circumstances in the first place.
 Lint Spotter
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 45
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If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 4:42:40 AM
As a woman, I'd never slough off my boyfriend for someone I had sex with previously. Hell, I wouldn't slough him off for anyone...

There's something seriously wrong when shyte like this happens.
 polarbear9
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 46
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 6:35:08 AM
I deleted the profile cause I thought she was serious, then I decided to make the same acvount again, after I kept seeing her log in everday.
 NewYorkbiker
Joined: 2/10/2011
Msg: 47
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 6:40:31 AM
Back in the day when I was young and dumb, pre marriage, when every girl I hooked up with I thought I was in love with, I probably would have been asking the same question if that had happened to me. Now, someone lies to me, they are out! No questions asked!
And the chance that she didn't do her ex, slim to none!
Time to move on!
A friend of mine has a tattoo: "The one who cares the most loses". Unfortunately, that is usually the case.
Good luck!
 Guitarplayer68
Joined: 1/12/2011
Msg: 48
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 6:50:40 AM
I think all of you believe something happened, I think the only person on the fence is me


Because you're wearing Sex Goggles (similar to beer goggles). You don't want to lose that 4x a week sex you have. We all KNOW something happened. What happened is you did something that made her go "ugh" and she went to get sex somewhere else, lying to you in the process.

Your decision is simple... dump her because she's a lying, cheating tramp or leave your pride at the door and keep schtuping her.

 polarbear9
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 49
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 10:12:48 AM
I don't know, what I do know is everyone here 100% agrees something happened, I am only one in denial. I guess when you invest so much time.
 Lint Spotter
Joined: 8/27/2009
Msg: 50
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History
If you were dating a woman and this happened
Posted: 9/12/2011 10:18:34 AM

I don't know, what I do know is everyone here 100% agrees something happened, I am only one in denial. I guess when you invest so much time.

Dude... you're not in denial, you're repressing things!

You know she boffed the guy... otherwise you wouldn't have started a thread about it...

Time to face facts... your girlfriend is a ho...
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