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 Dreamer_in_SC
Joined: 6/13/2011
Msg: 326
Should money be a consideration in a relationshipPage 14 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
OMG i can not believe some of the responses on these types of topics.

No wonder we are all single.

When I go on a date, I am paying for the date. Seriously guys. Have you ever watched a woman get ready for a date with a guy she is interested in?

Many women will take a trip to the store to acquire a new outfit that reflects how she is feeling that day. Often times a trip to the salon to ensure there are no split ends and the nails are focal points. At home spend a couple hours getting ready for it. Many will open up a box of makeup consisting of several hundred dollars worth of products.

What do many of us guys do? We toss an outfit in the dryer to take the wrinkles out jump in the shower and run our fingers through our hair and head out the door.

I see that for what it is. If she is going to go through all that just to look good FOR ME then why would i expect her to pay for half of the date as well? She didn't ask for half of the salon fees did she? She didn't ask for half of the makeup costs did she?

Are you guys really going to ignore that process? Who do you think they do all those things for? you think they do that to look good for all the other guys? Nope, they go through that process in an attempt to make sure they are not just good company on the date but also that they are pleasing to the eyes as well. To ensure your eyes are focused on them and not wishing you asked the waitress out instead.


Should money be a consideration in a relationship?


My opinion is NO! However, how you spend money should. How you consider money should. How you value money should. The quantity of money you have fluctuates and is fluid but how you think about it rarely changes.

equality does not have a damn thing to do with quantity. It is a mentality. It is an equal agreement on how it gets treated.

The expectations matter more than the expense. You don't take a woman in an evening gown to a place with sawdust and peanut shells on the floor and you don't take a woman wearing daisy dukes and a bikini top to a reservation only type of place.

Usually though that kind of stuff is not really an issue. only online dating does it become an issue because that lady in the evening gown is approached by billybob in coveralls simply because she is smoking hot in her pictures.

Outside of cyberspace the chances of these two types of people being in proximity enough to result in a possible date being arranged are nill.

Out in the real world just for example reasons what do you honestly think the chances are that women like larissan04 or Monike2011 would ever interact with a guy like divinelovepath?

The answer is they would likely never interact because they do not swim in the same pools. They do not have the same thoughts about money. They do not have the same values.

I am sure a guy like that would be interested in women like them but the truth is he does not have a chance with women like that. Do you know why?

Because they were both honest enough to put it right out there for all the world to see that they do not want a man like divinelovepath. It is in both of their profiles clear s night and day.

They are a different quality of women. They are old enough to know what makes them happy. They are smart enough to KNOW what would not make them happy. NEVER judge someone for being smart enough to KNOW what they want in life. NEVER judge someones desires for a specific lifestyle just because you do not have that lifestyle.

Guy's like divinelovepath do their best to try to convince people that we are all evil for wanting a better life. Truth is guys like that would jump at the chance to have the life and lifestyle like those women have. Since he can't and doesn't his brain does the only thing it can do. It rationalizes and tries to convince itself that the life he does have is the better choice simply because it is the only option available.

There are 8760 hours in a year that means in each an every year their is 8760 hours available for you to either have a balanced life while still keeping your mind on where you want to be financially.

Instead you say you make 8k a year so you basically make 0.91 cents an hour. That is the mind of a business minded person speaking. That is how people self employed think. An hour wasted is a reduction in the hourly wage for the whole year.

I just relocated and due to that i do not have the money to be self employed at the moment so instead i am working for someone else but that does not change my mindset at all. That does not change my focus. That does not change the way i think and how i think about money at all.

There are people in this thread that would like to try to convince us out in the real world that they understand money. They would like to convince us that they understand how the financial world works. Guess what buddy, The financial world is 24/7/365. It does not take breaks. It does not take vacations. It does not spend time with family and friends. Money moves throughout this world every single second of the day.

Every minute you are not respectful of it means yours can move away from you. THAT is how money should be a consideration in a relationship.

You use it or lose it. You respect it for being the tool that it is or quite simply, you are not building a damn thing. You can't build a house without a hammer, you can't build a car without a wrench, You can't grow a plant without water.

Money as a tool is simply that. It is the hammer required to build a house and it is the wrench required to build a car. Money is also a multi-facited thing in life because it acts as a tool as well as a maintainer of life. It also acts as the water for the plant to grow.

Or did you think the reason most factories are called "PLANTS" was for a different reason? Nope they are called plants because you have to ensure they are on good soil, ensure they have enough water to maintain them, and ensure they have enough workers to keep them growing. If done correctly then the products coming out of them are like spores to reproduce or a commodity. Like a fruit tree yields its fruit over and over again as long as they are maintained properly so true is money.

Bottom line... Your thoughts about money are yielding rotten fruit strait off the vine dude. No woman is gonna want to take a byte of that rotten fruit you are try to sell when you are on the same shelf as sweet succulent and tasty well handled fruit.

You are nothing but grounded fruit. That means if you stay on the ground long enough you will likely just become fertilizer for the next crop or get noticed and squeezed to make juice out of.

You wasted 6 years of your life if you think you became educated in that amount of time.

Just my opinions and observations.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 327
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 9:08:27 AM
WOW! Me thinks someone needs that free medical attention and a larger dose of something!

"Judging is about putting other people down"

Well finally after pages and pages of rants, we agree on something! So I take it, that doesn't apply to you? Reread what you wrote, you put down a whole slew of people based solely on your perception. In the end your a bigger bigot than any of us will be.

Acceptance is something we should all strive for. You don't have to agree with them, just accpet who they are. If you don't like them, move on and find those you do like.

If we are so horrible because we work for a buck, why would you stay on POF? Why argue with those of us who want to date? Does it make you feel superior to attack us?

I think you need to go back into the cave and consider what I wrote. Maybe meditate and hold your breathe for an hour or so, cause obviously the 30 minutes didn't bring acceptance or clarity.

This place isn't about class warfare, it's about dating and trying to meet someone. Some do it well, others do it poorly, some don't do it at all. Again your beliefs are for you, not something that will be forced upon us all.
 sweetness-one
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 328
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History
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 10:16:06 AM

But neither you nor anybody else can tell me to STFU!!


You need to slow down and learn to read. I did not tell you specifically to STFU, you simply took that out of context, quite deliberately I should imagine.


Ya know honey, life's a bytch and then you die!! Hahahahaha!


Yeah, even I'm not going to touch that one.

Back to the topic, anyone who doesn't believe that money is a consideration in any relationship, though, is fooling themselves IMO. Be it in a good way or a bad way, it's always a consideration of some sort.

Until the day magic fairies start paying my bills, I shall continue to take fiscal matters into consideration in any relationship I am in. I don't know anybody who deliberately goes out and actually SEEKS someone who is financially irresponsible. Some of the posts on this thread seem to make it sacrilege to do otherwise though.
 meowsaidthetigress
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 329
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 10:21:08 AM
Dreamer its great to be around southern gentleman.
Oy I really enjoyed your statement about acceptance.
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 330
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 10:46:40 AM

4) One of the benefits of developing your soul is attaining a greater intelligence and maturity. In a world full of materialistic and mentally challenged people who are waking up to the truth that lifestyle and money do not cause happiness are going to want to learn about life and so I will be great demand. I'm never going to living under a bridge!
people like you are so full of shit, its astounds me at time yet you were the one bragging in a few years you will be making $200 per hour working part time, money is a factor bud, you just too blind to see it. if you're so happy why not work for $10.00 per hour as long as your happy right?

It cost money to buy that bike you're riding around in, Unless the bike fell off a back of a truck, Dreamer In SC said it best so no need to reiterate it.
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 331
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 12:04:27 PM
Nice words dude, bringing $50.00 words for a .50 cent conversation, we've answered your * ahem* questions many times over, not our fault if you cant comprehend what was posted in your enlightened state, as the pink rabbits tip toes on the clouds of the heart of the Crying dragon

Look Devine love path You're not getting shit because you're the cool, calm mature voice of experienced reason, either. You're getting shit because you don't know what you're talking about, and you're passing your BS off as life experience.

I will send you a quarter. Go buy yourself a clue.
 Dreamer_in_SC
Joined: 6/13/2011
Msg: 332
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:01:33 PM

I feel what chaps a lot people's asses is that a guy who makes $8000/year can make a lot more sense than someone who makes far more than that and that is confronting to a lot people's belief systems.


You think you make sense? You think people would go to you for advice about money over say someone like warren buffet?

Lets take a look at logic then and see if we can't make some sense out of it. Keep in mind that logic does not work on assumptions or guesses. Logic is yes or no.

Using logic here...
Do you like to eat? The logical answer is yes. The reason that is logical is because if you do not eat then your body dies and if your body dies then you life ends. Now before you recite your spiel from earlier do not confuse that as logical. Logic does not work that way. You have no way to examine what comes after this life ends to base the yes and no answers that logic requires.

Now just one added word to the question.

Do you like to eat steak? Now logic does not play a role in that answer. The reason is in the first question it was based on survival and as such it is something that every person using logic could give the same answer.

The reason that is logical is if you do not answer the same as everyone else that answered with a yes the other choice is starving to death.

So when people talk about being logical it does not have anything to do with thinking and agreeing with another persons opinion which in the context you listed seems to be what you think logical means.

see right here...

And because they don't have any logical, common sense, or intelligent ways to explain their belief
someones belief can not be logical because all of our beliefs and understandings are not based on logic which is why they are called.... drum roll please..... BELIEFS.

A belief is something that you believe to be true but not everyone else has the same belief. Since not everyone else shares the same belief it does not have anything at all to do with articulating something in an attempt to convince someone else that your belief makes sense. That is not how logic works.

Like Margo and I are both Christians. We have interacted for years on this forum site. We do not always agree. I am an emotional writer at times so i am not always a nice guy. I can't remember seeing and angry post of hers. so in your way of explaining it

See this right here


They are so attached to their false beliefs that they would rather destroy or harm the messenger thereof so they don't have to feel their own fear and pain. And that's sad because it is that fear and pain that causes one to go out of harmony with love and life and that is what is causing every single problem on the planet right now - the collective soul condition of all people on the planet. A healed soul cannot make an unloving or unintelligent decision but that's what we're seeing all over the planet.


That is not a logical statement because that is YOUR belief. It is your assumption of the cause which quite frankly is not logical to be located in a thread asking a question about money being a consideration in a relationship.

It does have me curious though... just what do you think you will be doing that will earn you $200 an hr?


If we were all created and exist and live within the laws of consciousness as everyone else then if only one couple in all of the universe can have a very meaningful long term relationship without money being a priority then the truth is money is not a consideration for a relationship. If you disagree then please let me know how exactly you operate on a different universal construct than everybody else. Currently I've never met anyone where the universal laws of love, truth, and happiness don't apply to them.


That would likely be due to those things not being laws. A Law would mean that the results are the same. Everyone is different and person A coupled with person B can have a completely different type of relationship than person A in a relationship with person C A and B may not work well together as a relationship but A and C could live happily ever after. Since that is the case in life and how personalities mesh together that means life and love can not have laws because they are never the same between 2 people.

These are the types of things you would have learned if you did not design your own course outline to follow. There is a flow to learning. If you attempt to jump over some steps simply because you don't think they are needed then the result is more likely that you will lose your balance and tumble ass over tea kettle ending up at the bottom of the stairs again.

See these are just my opinions and i am not afraid to say that they are simply my opinions. I do not attempt to lay claim to being the all knowing GURU of life. I know what i know and freely share my opinions with people that i interact with on these forums. Sometimes my opinions may help someone, sometimes my opinions help myself, anyway i state them are just what they are... They are simply stated in a way to relay to anyone reading them that I am me and this is how I think about the subject. Sometimes others read my opinions and they agree with them.

When they agree with them it does not mean that they are based in logic, it simply means that we think alike when it has to do with that specific topic. If EVERYONE agreed with it then my opinion could be considered the logical conclusion. Remember the do you like to eat question? If my opinion on a subject stated that "I believe that everyone likes to eat" then that would be a logical conclusion because if someone disagrees and does not like to eat the result is death and since the body will make you pass out so that it can start breathing again if you attempt to kill yourself by holding your breath it is also logical to assume that the human body is equipped with survival instincts.

Hope that helps.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 333
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:15:04 PM
Ok I get it, your on a Kwai Chang Caine trip! Be careful grasshopper, there are many who know as much as you, or don't know, just like you!

"I still have as of yet to hear a logical explanation as to how money determines the success of a relationship."

Well that's where you seem to be lost, it NEVER determines success, however it can many times help avoid failure. In case you didn't notice there are those that live to work, other work to live. There are many who fall between those lines.

2 roommates or not, $400 a month does not butter the biscuit in many a locale for rent and utilities. In fact in some, it would require 5 times that amount, just to subsist.

So a family of 4, a man, a woman and 2 children, would need more to exist than you could provide. Now when you get into lifestyles, why are we to assume yours is better than ours? Because it's simpler? Sorry, again your talking down to us.

Finally, if you HAD all the answers, why no mrs caine? No your just another lost puppy in the window of POF, looking for someone to take him home.

At this point, I believe, I am done with this. So you can proceed as you see fit, but for me, I will ignore your posts. You offer a limited one size fits all attitude, that we either see it your way or not. Sorry to many different fish, that's why they call it plenty of.
 sweetness-one
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 334
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Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:29:47 PM

I still have as of yet to hear a logical explanation as to how money determines the success of a relationship


What you're failing to grasp, Divinelovepath, is something that many posters have tried explaining to you. It's not the money itself, it's one's attitude and habits regarding money that can make or break a relationship oftentime.

For instance, you are content each year to earn less than I pay in taxes alone. I wouldn't be content to only have what, $50 a week to live on after my rent was paid. I have the choice and the capability to either live in poverty or not, but by no means does it make me a bad person for striving to achieve more. (Nor does it make you a bad person for striving to achieve less, or being content as you are).

But, since we obviously live very different lifestyles, and have different outlooks on something as relatively simple as money, do you think you and I would have a very successful relationship, were we to date? I'm betting not.

You said you have a child that you lost custody of several years ago. Wouldn't you love to strive a bit harder for her? You haven't once mentioned child support either, which IMO SHOULD be a good reason to do the best to one's ability, not to mention an obligation to the child. She didn't get the choice to be born, after all.

Again, such different outlooks on life between us, and as I said, it's not the money itself, it's the attitude that accompanies it that makes the difference. JMO.
 BenRockport
Joined: 9/24/2011
Msg: 335
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:37:54 PM
be more attentive to careers and learn more about what careers pay. that way you can ask "what do you do?" without obviously trying to determine if he's a broke ass motherf%^$#. A job is a huge thing because it tells you not only what they make but what they're like.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 336
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 5:09:30 PM
so my biggest question is should i start to think about my dates pay check or not?:help

OP, since you asked for help:
For best results and less confusion about expected roles.. Engage in mutual special interest group social activities with friends and people you want to get to know better, WITHOUT expecting them to take charge of all the planning and paying for everything.. Then you don't always have to worry about THEIR paycheck...

When there are NO "official date" expectations, then the two people can actually focus more on the mutual interest activities, each paying their own way and learning about each other devoid of any polarized "rules" that neither party created or possibly even wants to rely on..
 sweetness-one
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 337
view profile
History
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 5:40:44 PM

Hi Sweetness, you're right. We would not work out.


Damn it all. Shall I call to cancel the banns, or will you?


My priorities in life is the following. God/improving my soul condition, my partner, and my career, my hobbies/passions and desires. I have discovered that is the most intelligent priority sequence in my life in attaining true happiness, health, and love.


This is probably another reason we wouldn't have worked out, dahlink. I'm surprised that the first priority you listed wasn't taking care of your daughter. I don't even have children, but a man who neglected his progeny wouldn't be high on my list of eligibles.


My identity isn't defined by my career because it is not my priority. I'm not a survivalist. My identity is defined by my soul condition. When your priority is your lifestyle and money then you end up compromising your soul condition so you become less able to be loving and happy in more difficult situations.


Well, again, IMO that's just something people that don't have money say, quite frankly. You have the ability to contribute and get ahead, do you so choose. You also aren't reading what I wrote, either. No one has said chasing the almighty dollar should be #1 priority, nor placing career before family life.


That's why you have a 'need' for lifestyle because it is an addiction caused by errors in your soul. So your relationship's success will always be conditional upon the success of how well your addictions are being met. So the need for money isn't for the relationship. It is for the addictions because the relationship then becomes conditional upon the addictions being met and that is why a lot of people can't find a partner in life. They're not looking for anything that resembles love. They're looking to engage in addictions with. So money here is about addictions and not love. If a relationship isn't about love then it will fail. So your beliefs about money being important in a relationship is flawed.


No, again, I am not speaking about making chasing the almighty dollar to be one's primary priority. Wanting to provide for one's family to the best of one's ability would just be common sense to me, though. To call it an "addiction", however, is again indication that you aren't remotely comprehending what others are saying.

Nice try, though. That was almost cute, till I thought to myself, money would be the same as any other "addiction". Your own addiction to preaching and addiction to God now. Using logic, and your own pontifications, it should be safe to assume that you yourself wouldn't have much success in a relationship where the woman didn't a) agree with your viewpoints on God and religion and b) wasn't willing to sacrifice her own happiness to ensure yours?

Can't have it both ways, after all. Your fervor for religion and "your way" is no different in what I said, in people needing to be seek compatible partners where money matters were regarded. Sorry but, if you can't understand why ANYTHING, no matter the subject, has potential to make or break a relationship, then I cannot help you.


I understand fully what people have been sharing regarding their beliefs about the importance of money. I simply disagree with them because their beliefs are not based in truth. All the money in the world cannot help a relationship thrive and become more happy and meaningful. Just look at Donald Trump!


Wouldn't your strict adherence to preaching about truth have you being honest in your profile about having a daughter?

Don't try to zoom a zoomer, dude.
 wildandfreee
Joined: 12/16/2010
Msg: 338
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 6:44:10 PM
@divinelovepath
"I don't agree with the new age movement, philosophy because it is just about as ignorant and flawed as the organized religion of Christianity. "
I see it the same way man, i'm not going to judge them thats their way i try to respect, and i agree with most part of your post except if you have a family , kids then money is important ,how to get it , how you enjoy and use it as well is important.

but the op thread was more about dating i think , i don't know if you are looking to have a family right now , if you dont have time or interested to know why he is acting like that move on , base your dates on pay check like i said in the other post easy for you to find love and settle with kids.
good luck
 inthroughtheoutdoor
Joined: 1/1/2011
Msg: 339
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 6:50:05 PM

Wouldn't your strict adherence to preaching about truth have you being honest in your profile about having a daughter?


Or being honest about the PhD/post doctoral that's listed on his profile while on another thread he claimed to have a high-school education only?

Anyway...

...yes, of course, money - how it's handled, how it's viewed, how much is enough, etc. - is an important factor when considering a relationship. Unless of course one has dancing pink elephants in their living-rooms that come out at night spewing money out of their trunks which mine haven't done so far but hey, ya never know, it could happen!
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 340
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 7:06:26 PM
sweetness-one~

"I don't even have children, but a man who neglected his progeny wouldn't be high on my list of eligibles."

I don't have children, either. For me, a man that doesn't take care of his children is not someone I would be interested in dating. I would find it hard to respect a man like this. This is definitely a deal breaker in my universe.

I once (years ago) went on a blind date with a man that had 3 cars, one of which was a vintage 1960 Corvette. It was a lovely car, and I have a penchant for the early Corvettes since I had an uncle that restored these iconic cars. I learned a lot about them as a kid, and have always enjoyed vintage autos as a result. This guy also had a brand newToyota Corolla, and some kind of brand new $$$ big pick up truck. In short, I'd say this guy had pretty hefty car payments every month. I also noticed that he was wearing a $400.00 pair of Ferragamo shoes and a Dunhill tie, and on his wrist was a Patek Phillipe watch that was probably about as expensive as one of his cars. Of course, later in the date I discovered that he also had an 8 yr old daughter that he hadn't seen in 4 years. To make matters worse, he owed the mother (who had to move in with her parents after being disabled from a back injury) 8k in back child support. He admitted that he had, "never paid any child support." When I inquired if he had done any financial planning for his daughter's future, or college tuition, he replied, "I can't hardly take care of myself, let alone a kid." When I pointed out that he HAD a kid, he just gave me a bewildered blank stare. Needless to say, there was not a second date, and this one ended pretty quickly. Bad grammar I can forgive, but neglecting one's child is a huge red flag with the words "JERK" written on it in bold letters.
 Nicegirl2021
Joined: 1/24/2008
Msg: 341
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 7:31:26 PM
Money is a huge issue and the number 1 thing ppl fight about find out what kind of debt he is in and if he is a shop-aholic
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 342
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History
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 7:47:22 PM

What you're failing to grasp, Divinelovepath, is something that many posters have tried explaining to you. It's not the money itself, it's one's attitude and habits regarding money that can make or break a relationship oftentime.


Money and how its handled is simply a barometer of underlying character

Rich people of poor character handle money badly and soon become poorer

Poor people of rich character handle money well and soon become richer
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 343
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History
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 7:50:18 PM
@larissan04: About that blind date...wow! A man with no integrity or depth...shallow and immature.

@gentleplus: Great to see you again. What took you so long to show up to the party?
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 344
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Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 8:26:22 PM
@cooldog...

What took you so long to show up to the party?


I prefer that Larissan04 first makes her statements of wisdom, clarity, maturity and balance before I jump in...... It saves me a bunch of typing is all.... Wink

Guys and girls.... lets not be soooo hard on divinepath..... he is just a being from an alternate reality trying to guide us to a greater good.... logical thinking just hurts sometimes
 dwarlord
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 345
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 9:03:00 PM
It would seem we all agree that money is an issue in a relationship, however is a relationship actually a date or two? No.

So based on this, we should never judge a guy or a gal who is paying for the date regardless of how much they spend.

I was raised "old school" on a 365 acre farm working since I was 7 years old. I was taught to pay for dates and say yes mam and no mam and to open doors for ladys and pull out the chairs and seat them and to lower the toilet seats/lids and flush after using the bathroom.

To me all of these have nothing to do with the amount of money you spend on a date. Does everyone see where this is going?

1. Women should never ever say a man is cheap when they take them out on a date and the man is paying period.

2. A man should never ever complain about how much he spends taking a woman out when he is the one who decides where and what to do ever.

Now let us make things even clearer.
If a man takes a woman out then asks her to pay he is cheap. This should have been arranged before the date.

If a man takes a woman out and then she talks him into doing everything under the sun or orders the most expensive things she can think of then the man does have a right to complain about how she took advantage of the situation.

Example" couple goes to the movie and the woman orders popcorn, drink, 50 packs of candy(maybe a tad over-exaggerated) a hot dog, chips with cheese and everything else she can think of."
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 346
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History
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 9:15:28 PM
@dwarlord: Very well said. Definitely a big difference as you just illustrated. As for the movies, dinner would have been cheaper and I need an insulin shot or three!

@gentleplus: I get the wink. Makes me think of Weird Science...wink!
 SigmundFrued
Joined: 8/28/2011
Msg: 347
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 10:03:57 PM
Women who have money with a man who has less doesn't share and guards it ferociously. I dated a millionairess and she still wanted me to pay for dates, the "chivalry" thing.

Women who have less than a man wants to even it out and get some of his and will try not to spend five cents on him, except for holidays which are the exception.

That has been my experience.
 Ailliss
Joined: 3/16/2010
Msg: 348
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/29/2011 11:53:15 PM

I think it's totally funny when people who value lifestyle and monetary wealth complain about people who get free medical.

You've heard of the children's story of the squirrel who reaches into a tree hole to grab an acorn and can't pull it out because of his fist being too big for the hole while a wolf is coming to eat the squirrel? That's a teaching about how attachments will cause you pain. The only people who complain about free medical is people who are financially bigoted and that is 100 times worse than being a racist. You actually believe that people should die because they don't pay into the system and that hospitals should leave them for dead. Because god gives everything away for free that means that our economic system is the opposite of everything that is godly and that means anyone who buys into or supports that system over what is godly will suffer. And that is precisely why people complain, judge, and ostracize anyone who gets free things at the expense of those who are attached to NEEDING to make money because their identity is defined by financial class aka lifestyle. Judging is about putting other people down because you think you're better than them for some rule that you bought into. Personal responsibility would never occur to the wealthy because if they don't like paying into the system so that those who don't have money have the basics that support life then they should stop making so much money so they're not paying into the system. Or stop voting because when you vote you support everything that the government decides whether you personally agree with it or not. So you caused it to happen because you supported it and then complain about it. Talk about lack of intelligence. Anyone who thinks even remotely so that anyone should ever be without the basics of life regardless if they pay into the system might as well put a sign on their head that says "I support virtueless genocidalist and I have no true virtue". There goes the 'money makes a person good theory' down the toilet!


You could have stopped with the first sentence; no need to pontificate.
I don’t think most are reading it all; I didn’t.

No one here has complained about free medical care. My own grandfather, a humanitarian and a physician, provided free medical care to the poor.

But if you are capable of working and contributing to society why would you want to take advantage of services that more appropriately should be given to the truly needy?

I think it is unconscionable of a “Holy, enlightened one” to be taking $200 and hour from others more gullible than most. I hope you plan on giving all you will be earning to charity in view of the fact that you are a proponent of poverty and have no need of money or material goods.


First off the question was about money's importance in relationships, not families or an individuals survival. So you should take into consideration.

Perhaps you should have realized that before volunteering all of your personal information and going off on a tangent. I do not see where anyone asked you how much money you are doled out by taxpayers; think you said that as meant to be impressive. A bit of false pride?

You could easily be working and going to school as many others have done.

I gave my opinion on the OP question.


I think you need to go back into the cave and consider what I wrote. Maybe meditate and hold your breathe for an hour or so, cause obviously the 30 minutes didn't bring acceptance or clarity.



if you're so happy why not work for $10.00 per hour as long as your happy right?

Great point; or better yet for gratis.
Anyone who professes to not care about money out of one side of his mouth then brags about potential earnings of “$200 an hour” on the other side, has just shown himself to be a hypocrite.


Guys and girls.... lets not be soooo hard on divinepath..... he is just a being from an alternate reality trying to guide us to a greater good.... gentle plus

I do not see this as even close to truth. Hope you are not serious.
 Dreamer_in_SC
Joined: 6/13/2011
Msg: 349
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/30/2011 3:39:34 AM

How many Phds know the following; what happens to photons that enter a black hole, how to cure cancer, the answer to why does bad things happen to good people, how a space craft can travel between the stars in a matter of seconds, what is the meaning of life and where did it start, how a yogi can levitate or how a guy in india can meditate for six months without food or water and still be alive and healthy in terms of physics, how to guarantee a successful relationship or how to be the best possible parent to your child and guarantee their happiness as an adult. I don't know one Phd who can answer one of those questions let alone all of them. So yes, I do not have a Phd 'degree'. I have something


So for $200 an hr you will be teaching people these things? How many hours will it take?

Hey i am all for self education. I am self educated myself. I did go to school but I did not complete it. Some of the things you talk about however are not based in reality.

Since you touched on a few subjects that I have focused on you have me curious. You list "How a space craft can travel between the stars in a matter of seconds"

That is a very bold statement to make. So please enlighten us just how do you plan on making that happen without any money? How do you plan on getting that space craft off of the earths surface? My grandfather had a bytch of a time with that issue. I too had issues. Since i do have a little knowledge about such a topic I can feel confident saying that you may want to rethink what you think you know.

I have raised my son since he was a baby he is now 12 years old and very smart. So when a guy like you says a statement like this.

how to be the best possible parent to your child and guarantee their happiness as an adult.


I am qualified to tell you that if you think you have that knowledge, yet you admit to not caring for your child, you do not have that knowledge.

I bit my tongue and didn't say anything when those women were bashing you about the child support issues simply because they are like broken records on those topics. Many of those women are truly idiots on those topics and it is not worth responding to them because they would not have a clue at all. They think raising a child is all about money.

That is a topic that would stray this one WAY off topic to even touch on though.

However, for someone to claim to have any answers on raising a child into an in my opinion is nuts because just the way this world works in different areas can dramatically alter your results.

Example... There are a few women on this site that are raising their grand children. They THINK they would be doing the right thing in life by doing so. The issue i have is their parenting skills are clearly in question. They raised their children and failed to raise their children into functional members of society but that does not stop them from thinking they are the best choice to try it again with their grand kids. You know what they say about insanity. It is doing the same things over and over again expecting a different result. If you screwed up raising your own children resulting in them having issues raising their children then the correct course of action should not be for you to try again by raising the grand kids. The correct course should be to fix your mistakes you made the first time around by doing everything to correct the issues your own child is having that prevents them from being a good parent.

I ran into this myself. I had some health issues awhile back that caused me issues for a few years. Instead of my mother and step father being there for me to help get through those troubles they wanted to try to take my son. between the 2 of them they have like 10 kids that are all adults. They had 10 chances to get it right and yet not one of those 10 and yes i am including myself in that is a valued member of society.

Every one of us has issues in life. So far though my son is an awesome kid. Nobody else can lay claim to his upbringing. I have been single for most of his life and my main focus in life has been to raise him.

So if you claim to have the knowledge about how to raise your child and yet everyday is not spent with that child i will call bullshyt on that. I have put my own hopes and dreams on hold so that i could be there for my child. If you think any parent out here will respect you when you say that you are not the one raising your child, i am sorry but that just is not going to happen.

I would love to finish this post but unfortunately it is 6:30 am. I have to get going and head to work because my son needs some new shoes, a new coat and his birthday and Christmas is coming up and wants a PS3 and a flat screen TV. Nobody else is gonna buy it for him and Santa is a broke loser so that means i have to get to work so this roof stays over our head and he has things he would like so that he can smile, laugh, have fun and we can spend time together playing some of those video games together because that is what he is into at the moment. Since i am his father and my job is to teach him about life that means i have to do it on his terms which means i have to sit down and play those games with him to have the time to KNOW him.

Just my opinions.... Hopefully that might cause i light bulb moment for you dude.... It isn't the money man... it is how it is utilized and what is possible with it.
 annasthasia
Joined: 5/4/2005
Msg: 350
Should money be a consideration in a relationship
Posted: 9/30/2011 3:41:10 AM
@divinlovepath...

If people with a Phd are so stupid they why do state you have one on your profile?That is basically lying...

Do you know any people that have Phd's? Have you ever even taken time to talk to them? Get to know them?... yea... I thought so...

I just cannot believe that you don't even take care of your child. Where I come from it takes a lot to lose custody of your child. The fact that you have not even mentioned her says a lot about your value system. The money issue should not be on the top of your list.

Anyway......

Money came about because it was easier to trade rather than use two chickens and a pig for a cow...

It is what it is.

On a date, paying your own way is a wise way to do things until the relashionship becomes serious then the money issue can become an irritant in a relashionship depending on the value system of both partners.
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