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 Kitten189
Joined: 5/25/2011
Msg: 18
Trying to hardPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Sorry,Op,but after three months of on and off dating,you shouldn't be feeling like this.

Either he's into you or he isn't and i really think you're wasting your time with this one.

Throw him back and try for another!
 *army mom*
Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 19
Trying to hard
Posted: 9/15/2011 12:50:36 PM
He's already solved your predicament ... "he doesn't know what he wants." Sadly, I'm guessing it isn't you. And when he says you're "trying too hard", it sounds like you're throwing yourself at him. It really doesn't sound like he's interested, so you probably should stop beating yourself up and leave him alone.
 newreality2010
Joined: 10/29/2010
Msg: 20
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Trying to hard
Posted: 9/15/2011 12:51:39 PM
Eeek.

I would just do something else for a while and forget about him.
If he thinks you are trying to hard, I don't think you can come back from that.
I have to constantly remind myself that I want a guy who also WANTS to be with me.
I don't want to be with someone I have to coerce or cajole into seeing me.

But then again, I am still single, so who knows?
 majyk1
Joined: 4/26/2009
Msg: 21
Trying to hard
Posted: 9/15/2011 1:42:27 PM
Here's the problem:

he says he is not sure what he wants

and YOU:

I want a relationship

Two different people with two different agendas is NOT going to work.
MOVE ON
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 22
Trying too hard
Posted: 9/16/2011 6:25:43 AM
He means you need to relax and just have fun. There are some people who make it their primary goal to find a partner. They act like clinically insane. Who in a world would be attracted to someone like that?
However if he isn't sure what he wants, ditch the fraker.
 ladywyatt
Joined: 6/28/2007
Msg: 23
Trying to hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:10:51 AM
"I don't know what I want" is the same as saying "I don't want you."
 _shakti_
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 24
Trying to hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:16:35 AM
BoonDockSaint:
OP - some girls when they WANT a relationship or to get married, they are on the prowl.

just like us men can get sometimes when we are on the prowl for a piece of booty.


both push and try too hard.

instead of just relaxing and letting things happen.

because when the other person tries tooo hard, honestly.


its a turn off.
Well put.
 Cat*Eyes
Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 25
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Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:21:01 AM
MOVE ON. Keep searching. "The future is uncertain and the end is always near", quote from a Doors song.
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 26
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Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 12:07:23 PM
I used to have this joke about how I could take my two kids into Toys R'Us and they would fight over one toy.

Do you know how many guys are on this site??? For heaven's sake, forget Mr. Wishy Washy and get to know some other guys!
 onlydateIF
Joined: 11/15/2011
Msg: 27
Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 7:04:00 PM
Dear Op, I realize when you have trusted and poured heart soul and hopes into the idea of a future with someone how hard this can be to consider. What other posters are suggesting is well merited. If the intent was mutual, he would WANT you to know of his intentions for and with you continuing.Sounds like, he is giving you just a little honesty. Maybe if he felt like you could handle more, he would just come right out and tell you the rest and reasons why. We are not privy to the communication dynamic bw the two of you. We have no way to determine how safe or not he feels just being candid with you, or if he is noncommital, or even a coward. What we DO know is if you're here having the doubtful discourse with us, we assess that he, for whatever reason, is not all in, and is letting you know, at least a little. Now it is your choice, to hang on to possibly false hopes trying to change reality, or be open to truth and pay attention to all of your experiences with this man, or lack of them, and then believe the effect of his actions was for communicating his preference in the way he shows you. Try not to confuse yourself over analyzing him and go with how you feel as the best indicator OP. There's your information, ok, OP. Good luck
 imacipher
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 28
Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 7:18:09 PM
As the kids say, "I guess he's, just not that into you..."
Personally, I would not even bother with him:}
 papillon_de_nuit
Joined: 12/5/2011
Msg: 29
Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 7:23:27 PM
everyone wants a challenge, let him chase you. if you stop calling or texting,(i know its hard, trust me) if he`s trully interested, he will pursue you. if he doesnt give a shit, he never will, and wont contact you; then, swallow your pride and move on
 hotmerlot
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 30
Trying too hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 7:43:54 PM
This is nothing chloroform and the trunk of a car can't fix. I'm sure that if you can corner this man, you will be able to make him love you. After all he probably doesn't know what he wants.
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 31
Trying to hard
Posted: 12/13/2011 8:47:31 PM
Trying too hard. Next.... OP find someone that is REALLY into and not half assed
 BEACHBUM611
Joined: 12/12/2011
Msg: 32
Trying too hard
Posted: 12/18/2011 7:58:53 AM
I would just let him go. He's not trying be in a relationship, it's like beating a dead horse. And by you wanting what he doesn't only pushes him away further. Cut your losses and hopefully you can find someone on the same level as you that want the same things you want. Getting with someone should not be hard, it should flow naturally and be blissful.
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