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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites lis      Home login  
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 greenIsis777
Joined: 3/14/2012
Msg: 26
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I wouldn't care. I put a guy on my faves list because I didn't want to lose track of him, thought I'd msg him in a few weeks, and he ended up messaging me. just do what you want, the right girl will find you :)
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/25/2011
Msg: 27
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 3/24/2012 3:54:15 AM
Oh boy. Why do people make things so complicated? Unless someone actually sends me a message, I don't care what else they do.

They hit 'yes' or 'maybe' on the Meet Me, they view my profile, or they add me to their Favourites... - I will most likely check out their profile and then promptly forget about them. They have to actually be proactive to get a response from me. Hanging around in the shadows won't work. The exception might be if I read his profile and he seemed perfect for me, and I thought I might also be a good match for him.

Every now and then, if I'm bored, I look at the 'who has added you as a favourite list' and I may cull it a little but pretty much I just leave it alone.

I have plenty of other things to be annoyed about in my life (like my teenage son who won't wash the dishes) than to worry about some stranger who is quietly worshipping me from afar (I wish :)
 0ldhag
Joined: 1/8/2012
Msg: 28
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 3/24/2012 6:46:28 AM

When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?


Exactly the 3rd time you run across their profile. No excuses.


I actually add people to my favorite list when I think they are hot. I don't neccessarily want to meet them, or chat with them, or hang out with them..I just think they are hot. Period.

The ones i'm actually 'interested' in, i'll contact.
 lightbrownsuga2luv
Joined: 12/1/2011
Msg: 29
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 3/24/2012 8:12:33 AM
At first I did not car much for favorites, to some extent I still don't. However, when someone marked me as a favorite and had not messaged me, I delete them because they are hiding behind something.
If someone has favorite me after they have messaged me, we converse back n fourth some, then I'm ok with it. Maybe it my cause a little more interest if we are compaitable.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 30
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 3/24/2012 8:51:13 AM
Come on with this wink thing.....

Just make it clear in your profile what you think and how you feel about the favorites list, and if someone adds you after you stated, "not before asking me", deleting is just a given. I usually let it stay for a week or so, to give that person time to message me, and if not, I delete them, even if totally interested in their picture and profile.....why? Because it means that they did not take the time to read my profile, and did not have the courage to email me, say hello, and may I add you to my favorites list and get to know you better.

How simple is that for a woman to do without looking to forward towards the men she might be interested in. Most of the emails, contacts, and pursuing happens on this site from the men, and it really shows just a little more equality for a woman to email a man asking to add them to their favorites list. If nothing else, it opens that door to more communications, and since women get far more contacts and emails, it makes sense to me, for them to show interest in me by asking.

cd......
 PittsburghVixen
Joined: 6/27/2009
Msg: 31
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 3/24/2012 10:49:34 AM
There have been a couple of people I favorited because I liked their profiles, or something they posted, and wasn't necessarily interested in them (distance, age, gender, whatever). I usually message them to tell them what it is that I liked. Sometimes I can't message them due to their email filters, so I have no idea what they think, but if they're curious, they can message me.

I don't get my panties in a bunch if someone favorites me but I usually do message them to thank them, even if I have no interest in them.
 Iona_Bob
Joined: 3/31/2012
Msg: 32
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 4/5/2012 9:03:04 AM
I would recommend adding them because you have exceeded the "Intimate encounter" contacts and can't make it through their filters to email them!
 Tech-Romancer
Joined: 3/26/2012
Msg: 33
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 4/5/2012 11:13:17 AM
I save people to my favorites if I enjoyed their profile/think we're a potential match, but don't have time at that particular moment to message them. Sometimes, it's random. And sometimes, if it's I've engaged in a decent amount of correspondence.

But honestly, if you're putting so much thought into an optional feature that doesn't automatically translate into anything substantial, then I don't know what to tell you.
 Tech-Romancer
Joined: 3/26/2012
Msg: 34
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 4/5/2012 11:15:14 AM
Also, I treat the Meet Me feature as a passive means of showing someone that you're interested. Sort of like a wink or something....
 HippieChick0618
Joined: 1/20/2013
Msg: 35
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/3/2013 4:13:23 AM
If I'm interested in someone, I send them a message. Personally, I don't take it seriously if someone adds me as a Favorite. Not only is it 'high school' but if someone is is actually interested, they need to make the effort to send me a message rather than make me do the work of writing 'them' first. They are the ones that are supposedly interested, right?
The 'Meet Me' option is ignored even more especially since I realized if you click 'Maybe', they get a notification that you 'want to meet them'. That is VERY misleading. I found this out the hard way after seeing my list of guys I 'supposedly' want to meet when it wasn't the case. Even worse is that you can't remove or delete those choices like you can if you add someone as a Favorite. That makes no sense! Knowing I'm not necessarily interested in the 'Maybe's', I have to assume a guy could have added me as a Maybe yet I'm being told he actually 'wants to meet'. I think thats a little sneaky of POF but the site is free after all.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 36
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/3/2013 9:44:09 AM

Not only is it 'high school' but if someone is is actually interested, they need to make the effort to send me a message rather than make me do the work of writing 'them' first.


If you, the person being "favourited", has a list of "must nots" longer than your Santa Clause wish list in December, this would be the only way a guy can tell/show you that he is interested. Yeah, I know, everybody here "knows" what they will and will not "put up" with, like the drug use thingy. Nothing funnier than listening to the "evils" of drugs from someone that fills themselves up with a gallon or two of red wine every Friday night.

Personally, I don't like anyone here, so I find no real reason to "favourite" anyone.


Yeah, that's a lie too.
 Eric_Summit
Joined: 11/3/2009
Msg: 37
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/3/2013 10:39:08 AM
I have used the Favorites feature often when there was something especially interesting about the profile.
Perhaps it is a person that I wish to contact, so adding a Favorite is somewhat like a bookmark/reminder of sorts.
 Magic_Fish
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 38
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/3/2013 1:00:35 PM
I mostly agree with the above posters who state 'anytime is a good time'.

The "meet me" or "favorites" additions I have a problem with are those Friday/Saturday late night add-ons. Yanno, the ones who may have a little too much "liquid" courage in them. Got a 'meet me" one Sunday morning at 3 a.m. a few weeks ago. He and I exchanged numerous emails for about a month in the spring, then he stopped communication. I'm thinking - WTF.

MF
 fedexmale
Joined: 8/24/2013
Msg: 39
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/3/2013 1:48:24 PM
Guys, don't use it to try to get dates, it's lame... instead, message them directly.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 40
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/4/2013 6:36:49 PM

It's handy to use Favourites though in case we see someone we like, but haven't the time to message as we're looking so we save them as Favourites so that we can easily find their profile later and then message them.


Let me get this straight. You have time to look at countless profiles, but when one sparks your interest, you don't have time to write and send 2 or 3 sentences to see if there's any mutual interest. Or are you a multiple sender, where you copy and paste the same opening line after you've seen 20 or 30 profiles (pictures) that you are interested in contacting?
 deermouse
Joined: 5/15/2012
Msg: 41
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/15/2016 7:14:29 AM
The Meet me feature is to vague, at least the instructions on the page. When I first started with POF I had no idea Meet Me notified the other person. I thought it just helped to filter how people showed up in your searches. Favorites also, I thought that was a private place to store possible interests for later. I've used the favorites as a place to put profiles to go back ane review and see if I really was interested. I had no idea that POF would take such an active part in contacting someone. I always figured that if I wanted to contact someone I would do it myself instead of having some machine do that take the initiative. POF should explain this clearly. I still have no idea what happens if you click the "Maybe" button on Meet Me. I've never gotten a message that says Maybe so and so would like to meet you.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 42
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/15/2016 11:02:24 AM

When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?


ALL the time.


Guys, don't use it to try to get dates, it's lame... instead, message them directly.


Yeah, because that works SO much better to get results.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 43
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/15/2016 6:43:33 PM
I agree, a wink system would be good. However, other sites you have to pay something for and this one is free.
So cant expect too much.
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 44
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/16/2016 4:36:19 PM
Like the other site features, it's a tool and nothing more but EASILY the best one for people actually looking for some type of LTR. People need to learn what it does and how it works. The ONLY way to figure this out is to put a bunch of folks on it and then PAY ATTENTION. This is where most people fail. Learning how to use the various site features/how they work will make your fishing much more productive

Of course if all one is seeking is a fellow ST (Serial Typist) the only requirements are one "good" pic and the ability to rapidly click YES or MAYBE using the Meet Me tool.

Every site feature is useful to some percentage of members or it would not be taking up space on the banner. Just keep in mind that people can be on this site for years and bash the site over and over claiming one must be a paid member to do this, that or the other when it is simply not true. They have simply shot themselves in the feet on numerous levels with their mail settings. This is quite obvious in the Suggestions/Help Forum.

Because of this, ^^^^^^^ the "less sharp" people will never know you added them.

Because Favorites IS a multipurpose tool, there is no right or wrong time to add someone.

I don't know if all the whining Forum dinosaurs was the reason Big Fish removed "it" (the # of Fave lists EVERY person was on) off the bottom of our profiles. Links to our last 5 Forum posts were also listed at the bottom of every member's profile and also vanished around the same time.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 45
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 9/21/2016 7:08:34 AM
I might use the favorite list when I was browsing profiles and planning to contact the women I was interested in at a later date.
 Benlu37
Joined: 8/21/2013
Msg: 46
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 2/7/2017 3:44:20 PM
As you said at the end, being here only a few days i use it when i see someone i would love to message but am not really able to at the time. I did not realize it alerts them until now. You mentioned that you can BOOKMARK and accomplish being able to find the person later in order to contact them when you are ready without alerting them. How do you do that? I cant find anything on the app that looks like it will let me do that. Will you please explain.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 47
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Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 2/7/2017 6:41:35 PM
I will add a gentleman as a sign of interest. This leaves the ball in their court.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 48
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 2/7/2017 7:41:50 PM

I did not realize it alerts them until now.


It alerts them, but the only way to find out they have been alerted is for them to check to see if anyone has "favorited" them.

Unlike the "Viewed Me" alert which automatically shows up with a number on the top line of the main page when you sign in.

And I suspect that many people do not even bother to see if anyone has "favorited" them.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 7/1/2016
Msg: 49
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 2/8/2017 8:52:46 AM
I get an email if someone "favorites" me.
I just delete them.
What is a favorite list anyway?
Especially if you don't bother sending a message.
It's just like a dating queue I guess...is it flattering to
be at the top or the bottom of that list I wonder?
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 50
Help! When is it most appropriate to add someone to my favorites list?
Posted: 2/8/2017 9:33:15 AM
I'd rather have someone remove themselves from my fave list than waste the time and effort initiating contact
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