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 femaleandflirty
Joined: 7/16/2011
Msg: 26
when to have sex..Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
I agree that some guys will try it on in the first hour or so even when it is evident that there is no real chemistry. I for one dont give it away in a casual fashion nor make the mistake of thinking that men having sex with you, connects them to you. Some do it to please a guy, because they have been drinking and are horny etc but if a guy is interested genuinely interested, he will wait or he will move on to a more likely candidate, either way you have lost nothing and still have your self respect.
As much as it may be denied, a lot more goes on when the sex act is performed, than the mere physical.....it is a melding of energies on several levels. Too much casual sex is demeaning to the soul of a woman, at least.
 onlydateIF
Joined: 11/15/2011
Msg: 27
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/20/2011 9:34:32 PM
Not to worry Jill! You are definitely not a minority amongst women with some morals and decency. What I've figured out is that there are professional men w/ successful careers and hence reputations to protect on here, who will do absolutely everything to make their profiles appear aboveboard:IE good Christian, no games, no flings, IE's blocked and on and on- even using their kids and kids pics to contribute to the wholesome family guy image. It's only over the phone or in person the more true picture of their intent will emerge. These types cut to the chase pretty quickly.. Since we ladies started out with the wholesome pic of them, the change is a bit shocking as it unfolds through comments on the phone or in person. Racing towards sexpectations is further evidence of their true plan. SO>>> to any actual professional Gentlemen on here, know that we classy ladies are most definitely paying attention to the way you conduct yourselves with us! This site is a bit like bootcamp for spotting wolves in sheep's clothing. I wish we never needed to know about this side of humanity, but for our own safety and sanity, we need to share about these things
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 28
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/20/2011 9:43:36 PM

I guess i am one of the rare women out there that don't give it up for free,

If you see having sex as ``giving it up,'' I wouldn't take it even it was free.

are there still any gentleman out there who can respect a girl for having morals?

I do, except that your idea of morals and mine are probably very different, so the way I'd respect yours is by not dating you.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 29
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/20/2011 9:47:42 PM
Whenever you want to. I dont think timing of sex makes OR breaks a relationship.

Just be sure to do it for the sake of enjoyment, not because you want something in return.
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 30
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/21/2011 5:07:13 AM
Not only are you expected to have sex on the first date, but they also expect you to pay for that date as well.
 SWroadrunner
Joined: 4/13/2011
Msg: 31
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/21/2011 9:08:33 PM
Is the question to ask Why are you having sex?
 DrumminD
Joined: 2/3/2011
Msg: 32
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/22/2011 3:59:38 PM
All men try to get in the panties. If you can hold them at bay long enough, they either get pissed and disappear, or they fall in love. If you want love, you can't take your panties off. Don't get mad that they want you to. It's part of the process.
 walkingtall38
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 33
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/22/2011 4:19:40 PM
/shrug

Whenever it feels right. Don't really have a set system or quota that needs to be met. Could be a couple dates in or a couple weeks. About the only "hurdle" I have is that if we're sleeping together I prefer it to be an exclusive relationship. Can't say that has ever been a problem though.

Really depends on the person, the connection we're feeling or lack thereof, etc.
 sensualsandie
Joined: 11/19/2011
Msg: 34
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/22/2011 11:53:02 PM
WHat else do you expect from a dating site. I mean honestly.....
THe men here are players and liars mostly and all looking for a hook up of one sort or another. Some women may give it up for free but they have self esteem issues, are drunk or high or all three. That they invite a virtual stranger into their homes or go to theirs on the first date, amazes me.....even with emailing or phoning beforehand for weeks even, there is no guarantee that the person is not crazy or dangerous..

Gentleman with something to offer in a genuine way are not on dating sites. Even the married players who are attractive ,sophisicated, intelligent etc can get women without resorting to cyberspace. From what I hear women just dont really respond to anyone much on here anyway....

You are looking in all the wrong places, as they say..... Mind you some women think a week of texting or emailing constitutes a connection and they will have sex or even blow jobs on the first encounter and they are then abandoned and left feeling used and wondering why.If dinner and drinks are bought they may feel they have to give out in some way.. Going dutch is always best.
 getanet
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 35
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/23/2011 2:45:26 PM
Ummm....be a little more selective in who you agree to go out with in the first place perhaps?
 getanet
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 36
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/23/2011 2:48:30 PM

Gentleman with something to offer in a genuine way are not on dating sites.


OH my...I love me some irony. Well said, "Sensual Sandie."
I can only imagine the "quality" of person you are getting to respond to your ad with a user handle like that. Change your bait if you're catching the wrong fish.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 37
view profile
History
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/23/2011 3:00:12 PM

Not only are you expected to have sex on the first date, but they also expect you to pay for that date as well.


COOL

Wait..why is that little guy rolling around laughing?

(aDuh moment passes...)

Nevermind...sigh
 walkingtall38
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 38
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/23/2011 3:05:31 PM

Not only are you expected to have sex on the first date, but they also expect you to pay for that date as well.


Wait...what? You mean all this time I could have made them pay?

I feel so used.
 john_in_bh
Joined: 12/25/2004
Msg: 39
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 12:37:18 PM
I think the men who want sex right away should be a huge red flag. The reason being that if the guy is VERY much into you and looking for a long term relationship (aka: Yes you are hot enough and worth being a keeper) he would be willing to wait and take things slow. If he just wants a quickie because he can't get anything better at the moment he will try right away not to waste time and or money.

Just some thoughts..
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 40
view profile
History
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 12:59:17 PM

I guess i am one of the rare women out there that don't give it up for free


I dont think thats quite as rare as you think

Did you email them a price list before meeting though?
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 41
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 1:26:58 PM

Just be sure to do it for the sake of enjoyment, not because you want something in return.


^ That. And per what Abelian said, honestly, the term 'giving it up' kinda sounds like you would be expecting something in return (other than enjoyment). Do it because *you* want to, not for any other reason.
 NonRushingDad
Joined: 10/26/2011
Msg: 42
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 1:33:32 PM
There are bigger things in relationships to worry about asides from sex. Since so many women want a LTR, how many have gone through the mental exercise of whose living arrangement will they abide in after the man is on the hook. Start talking about moving into together and start realizing how much your are or not willing to compromise.

Something tells me people in their late 30s to early 60s, this is a much bigger issue than sex...
 SylvanSwan
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 43
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:07:21 PM

...people seem to think that talking online for a week makes you instantly connected and its totally appropriate to try to grope me, and try to get in my panties in the first 10 mins...


Do these men not make it obvious what they are after when you talk online with them? I find it difficult to believe that they don't, especially if they are groping you when you do eventually meet them.

Make it a rule not to meet anyone until you have talked to them on the phone (do not give them your number) at least once. And if they talking dirty to you online or on the phone, don't meet them.

And for God's sake, do not tolerate being groped! Give him a smack upside the head and immediately leave, its that easy.

Good luck.
 walkingtall38
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 44
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:14:20 PM

Do these men not make it obvious what they are after when you talk online with them? I find it difficult to believe that they don't, especially if they are groping you when you do eventually meet them.
\

Or stop dating the same type of man over and over again. There are plenty of guys out there that aren't like this. I keep seeing this complaint pop up from time to time and truthfully all it tells me is that these women are going after the same types of men that have the same types of personalities over and over again. Then they wonder why it always ends up the same way. They need to try varying it up a bit.
 BegrabMeinHerz
Joined: 10/10/2011
Msg: 45
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:35:40 PM
When too have sex???

I usually have it when I'm awake because I'm pretty sure I can't keep it up when I'm asleep.

Sorry thought the headline was the question.
 lakeal
Joined: 8/31/2010
Msg: 46
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 5:23:03 PM
Sounds like a good problem to have. That means they find you attractive in some kind of way. Hope the right one comes along for you.
 Alpha78
Joined: 7/18/2009
Msg: 47
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 8:09:27 PM

as guy with morals(we endanged spiecies) there are plenty women put out, nothing wrong with that(but i think if jumping into bed with me on 1st date how many others?) .

Hmm.... And what if, she doesn't jump in bed with you on the first date, because she finally decided to try something new after years of doing it with others that didn't work out because guys were thinking like you?
Just something to think about.
 evskypr
Joined: 6/19/2011
Msg: 48
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 6:07:58 AM
I like your answer mr nice guy1963
I feel the sameway I need to be comfortable and have nice chemistry
 john_in_bh
Joined: 12/25/2004
Msg: 49
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 9:29:16 AM

I guess i am one of the rare women out there that don't give it up for free,..


The key word here is "free". I am not saying girls should just jump in the sack after the guys buy her a cup of coffee, but the issue I have is that they want to be our equals yet make the guy "pay" vs. "free" to have sex with them like its a piece of merchandise. Does the OP not ENJOY sex to? Is there no pleasure from it? Then she may wonder why the guy doesn't call her again.

This issue is much deeper than just asking "when to have sex"...
 diamddeb
Joined: 9/15/2011
Msg: 50
view profile
History
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 9:37:35 AM
Gosh Peter,
A whole eleven minutes.......lol

Seriously, what happened to mutual consent? I didn't think it was about "giving anything up" I thought it was a mutual taking.

hmmmm
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