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 NonRushingDad
Joined: 10/26/2011
Msg: 42
when to have sex..Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
There are bigger things in relationships to worry about asides from sex. Since so many women want a LTR, how many have gone through the mental exercise of whose living arrangement will they abide in after the man is on the hook. Start talking about moving into together and start realizing how much your are or not willing to compromise.

Something tells me people in their late 30s to early 60s, this is a much bigger issue than sex...
 SylvanSwan
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 43
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:07:21 PM

...people seem to think that talking online for a week makes you instantly connected and its totally appropriate to try to grope me, and try to get in my panties in the first 10 mins...


Do these men not make it obvious what they are after when you talk online with them? I find it difficult to believe that they don't, especially if they are groping you when you do eventually meet them.

Make it a rule not to meet anyone until you have talked to them on the phone (do not give them your number) at least once. And if they talking dirty to you online or on the phone, don't meet them.

And for God's sake, do not tolerate being groped! Give him a smack upside the head and immediately leave, its that easy.

Good luck.
 walkingtall38
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 44
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:14:20 PM

Do these men not make it obvious what they are after when you talk online with them? I find it difficult to believe that they don't, especially if they are groping you when you do eventually meet them.
\

Or stop dating the same type of man over and over again. There are plenty of guys out there that aren't like this. I keep seeing this complaint pop up from time to time and truthfully all it tells me is that these women are going after the same types of men that have the same types of personalities over and over again. Then they wonder why it always ends up the same way. They need to try varying it up a bit.
 BegrabMeinHerz
Joined: 10/10/2011
Msg: 45
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 4:35:40 PM
When too have sex???

I usually have it when I'm awake because I'm pretty sure I can't keep it up when I'm asleep.

Sorry thought the headline was the question.
 lakeal
Joined: 8/31/2010
Msg: 46
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 5:23:03 PM
Sounds like a good problem to have. That means they find you attractive in some kind of way. Hope the right one comes along for you.
 Alpha78
Joined: 7/18/2009
Msg: 47
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/24/2011 8:09:27 PM

as guy with morals(we endanged spiecies) there are plenty women put out, nothing wrong with that(but i think if jumping into bed with me on 1st date how many others?) .

Hmm.... And what if, she doesn't jump in bed with you on the first date, because she finally decided to try something new after years of doing it with others that didn't work out because guys were thinking like you?
Just something to think about.
 evskypr
Joined: 6/19/2011
Msg: 48
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 6:07:58 AM
I like your answer mr nice guy1963
I feel the sameway I need to be comfortable and have nice chemistry
 john_in_bh
Joined: 12/25/2004
Msg: 49
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 9:29:16 AM

I guess i am one of the rare women out there that don't give it up for free,..


The key word here is "free". I am not saying girls should just jump in the sack after the guys buy her a cup of coffee, but the issue I have is that they want to be our equals yet make the guy "pay" vs. "free" to have sex with them like its a piece of merchandise. Does the OP not ENJOY sex to? Is there no pleasure from it? Then she may wonder why the guy doesn't call her again.

This issue is much deeper than just asking "when to have sex"...
 diamddeb
Joined: 9/15/2011
Msg: 50
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History
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 9:37:35 AM
Gosh Peter,
A whole eleven minutes.......lol

Seriously, what happened to mutual consent? I didn't think it was about "giving anything up" I thought it was a mutual taking.

hmmmm
 diamddeb
Joined: 9/15/2011
Msg: 51
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History
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/25/2011 9:42:49 AM
I guess I am one of the rare womenout there that don't give it up for free......

I agree with John that this makes it sound like merchandise. Free?? really?? Sounds like hooker mentality. Do what YOU want, no pricetags....
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 52
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when to have sex..
Posted: 11/26/2011 5:34:42 AM

Give him a smack upside the head and immediately leave, its that easy.



I wonder how people would have reacted to someone giving that same advice to a man when faced with a woman doing something he didnt want


The "give it up for free" statement is the most relevant part of the header really

It defines a potential outlook and mindset that will quite possibly permeate a persons entire outlook on life, sex and relationships in a subtle way

And reinforces the fact that ALL interpersonal relationships of any type or level are infact a "trade" of one thing for another

Each person sets, or is indoctrinated into setting a relative value for what they class as their own commodity and then guages that against the commodities the other person has to offer.

But in that particular instance it tends to suggest that they dont view the other persons participation in having sex as anything like "equal" or even of value, so they see the "trade" as being their participation in sex being exchanged for a different commodity from the other person

This isnt new, its just that the exchange rate changes over time
 wackadoodledoo
Joined: 4/14/2011
Msg: 53
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when to have sex..
Posted: 11/26/2011 5:43:36 AM
Knickers, lol????
 john_in_bh
Joined: 12/25/2004
Msg: 54
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/26/2011 10:38:37 AM

I sure hope these other women don’t charge for it.It`s only sex,some women actually enjoy it and don’t look at it as a price.


Sadly at least where I am, girls do put a price tag on it one way or the other. Even if they enjoy it to, it does not matter. They are always looking for marriage for the reason of having (more) financial security. Guys have caught on, and are looking at that aspect more and more regardless how much they are "in love" with their merchandise. If they are not looking for marriage (or can't get it) they will want high priced gifts and a (nice) roof over their head.

The few girls that are out their not demanding everything in exchange for sex and their valuable companionship are the ones that can't get that for reasons of not being in high demand from the guys..

Of course this is a generalization, because there are always a few exceptions to everything.
 SylvanSwan
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 55
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/26/2011 10:48:35 AM

I wonder how people would have reacted to someone giving that same advice to a man when faced with a woman doing something he didnt want


Perhaps then it should be a verbal smack upside the head then. And perhaps I speak for myself that uninvited and unwanted touching is a serious offence with me that I don't take lightly.

Thank you though for pointing that out Mike....
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 56
when to have sex..
Posted: 11/26/2011 10:50:53 AM

This isnt new, its just that the exchange rate changes over time

Funny, but sadly a true way to put it. Not all women, but most women following the status quo, see it that way, because that's how most are brought up (and guys brought up looking at it that way too unfortunately).

I think women who put things in the perspective of "putting out" or "not giving it up for x-y-or-z" just reinforce the perspective of what they don't like -- guys looking at them like objects -> to approach women to "get" something, and women to tout power by "not giving 'it' up".
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