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Show ALL Forums  > California  > Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?      Home login  
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 CptJohnSheridan
Joined: 11/23/2011
Msg: 101
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?Page 5 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
Yes. In fact the only time that the lady should pay is on his birthday or similar celebration. Guess I'm old fashioned.
 bimmerdude
Joined: 3/8/2011
Msg: 102
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 11/27/2011 6:33:56 PM
Never go on an expensive first date. Best to do a low cost option like happy hour or coffee. That way if there is mutual interest then you can spend more on future events. It also creates likes stress on both people. I don't want a woman to think that she has to get seriously involved with me on first meeting. Its too awkward.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 103
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 11/29/2011 4:55:40 PM
Should a guy pay the full amount??? The answer is no as both should be on equal footing. But in real life yes you should if you liked her and would like a better chance to see her again. Even if a woman offer to pay her half and many are more then willing to do just that. If you do take her on it and let her pay you just lost points with her. You would be considered cheap and not as high on the dating ladder. Like it or not a guy that pays does look better in the eyes of a woman.. Does it means all women, no it does not but it is with most women.. It does work same for many women from other countries just not as bad as here.
 Blackstarblah
Joined: 11/6/2011
Msg: 104
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 11/30/2011 9:27:33 AM
Only if hes using a gift card
 fra59e
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 105
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/2/2011 8:32:23 PM


Posted By: queenell05 on 11/12/2011 239 PM
Subject: Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Message: I will straight up say, that I do expect the man to pay on the first date. However, that doesn't mean I expect it EVERY. TIME. And that also doesn't mean I expect you to ...


And what YOU expect should concern others - why?

Earth revolves around the Sun, not around you, queenie. (Yeah, the name says a lot.)

Suggestion: Just to try it, how about YOU take HIM out and care about HIS happiness.
 moddedoutlook
Joined: 11/21/2010
Msg: 106
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/13/2011 10:32:42 AM
I’m old school so I pay for everything the first date but I’m not going to break the bank on a first date.
 isa92314
Joined: 8/27/2010
Msg: 107
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/14/2011 8:23:52 AM
At my age the first date is often lunch or dinner, and I always offer to pay my share(born and raised in Germany-different culture) also my dates usually have to do a long drive to get to me so I have even offered to pay for the dinner in exchange for them making the effort to drive the distance
One date explained to me that that is very unattractive if a woman offers to pay, to femministic and to aggressive!
So what are we to do?
I always pick a very affordable restaurant and sometimes would rather go to something better and would if I did not have to worry about the bill paying delemma!
Meaning would gladly pay for it myself! I don't go out that much so it really is not a finncial burden o me!
I guess if you go on 3 dates a week it might become an issue. smile
 slpboo
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 108
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/21/2011 10:39:50 AM
If he asks me out, then he's paying. And I never ask dude out anyway. I start offering on the 3rd date.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 109
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/21/2011 12:15:33 PM

When I do go on dates, I end up with a larg bill at the end of the night. It's like the ladies don't wont to pay a dime. What do you do in setuation where you forced to make that choice.

Idea's And advice is welcome


Well, is it YOU asking the WOMEN out? If so, I'd expect the man to pay. If ***I*** ask a guy out, Id be expecting to pay.

Advice? Don't do something that gives you such a large bill. Dont keep ordering drinks after drinks at an upscale restraunt.

As far as a choice is concerned, you have a choice before you even go out on a night on the town. You should know how much is in your bank account and what type of date you are willing to go out on.
 CptJohnSheridan
Joined: 11/23/2011
Msg: 110
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/21/2011 12:34:54 PM
Nice to see that my thoughts aren't too far out of the mainstream . . . for once.
 fra59e
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 111
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/21/2011 2:24:34 PM
On any occasion, not just "dates," the person who initiates the invitation is responsible to pay the bill.

It has nothing to do with gender differences.

If a woman is too timid to invite men to be her guest for a meal, she has serious self-esteem issues and any man who plays along with her passivity is a sucker.

If a man assumes that a woman's dining on his Visa card implies that she should then spread her legs for his satisfaction, he is an immature hormone-enslaved fool.

Let each human being respect the right of every other to make decisions, have desires, express choices, and accept consequences.
 fra59e
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 112
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/30/2011 1:38:54 PM
slpboo:

"And I never ask dude out anyway."

Why?
Scared?
Cheap?
.
 Georg55555
Joined: 9/9/2009
Msg: 113
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 12/30/2011 6:52:27 PM
So if you ARE interested in a man, then what? He pays everything? Isn't that just prostitution! LOL
 PinkZombies
Joined: 12/20/2011
Msg: 114
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/2/2012 11:00:27 AM
After a situation I didn't feel good about (at another dating site), I now insist that the first meet/greet be in a public place like a park where there is ZERO CHANCE for the guy to spend money, unless he desires to bring flowers. If anything let ME be the one to pack and bring some picnic items and the sparkling water or wine. At least I know how to be a gracious hostess, even to a stranger I may never see again.
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 115
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Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/2/2012 12:17:35 PM
In short. Yes. A real gentleman picks up the tab. ESPECIALLY on the first date. After you talk for a while, get to know each other, and have a few dates; that's one thing. If you don't want to pay a high bill, then simply pick a place that isn't that big of a deal. Most dinners aren't that expensive and coffee is 'cheap'. That's one thing I dont' understand about today's world; what happened to being a gentleman? I've turned down offers to pay for part of it. I'm sorry, but that's how I am. I asked you out and I was raised a certain way to treat a woman.
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 116
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Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/2/2012 12:56:45 PM

If we are going with the tired "Real ____" argument, then a "Real" lady doesn't insist that the man pay for everything.


Well, we have a different opinion/definition of a "real" lady then. And, just for clarification, I have never met a woman that insisted I pay for it. I always offer before they even have a chance. Not to mention, if I have the kind of feeling that she may be the type to 'expect' me to pay, then I probably wouldn't meet her. My taste in a woman is one that would be gracious and appreciative that I picked up the tab.

Like I said, I'm refering to a first date, or even the first few. I like independent women, and independent women typically will start to offer picking up the tab at some point. And if not, I'm ok with that.

And being a gentleman has nothing to do with butt kissing. It has everything to do with morality on a first date, respect for women, and showing that you know how to treat her.

But like I said, you and I obviously have different opinions/defnitions. And that's cool, cause that's what makes the world so interesting.
 Truly_Me
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 117
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/3/2012 4:34:12 PM
PinkZombies, you rock!
 LuckyDutch
Joined: 12/23/2011
Msg: 118
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 12:25:45 AM
This article says it all:

http://blog.whatsyourprice.com/?tag=earn-1200-on-match-com


People shouldn't care what the hell you do on the first date, you are there for the conversation and get to know people. What happened to the days where you just held hands and talked while taking a stroll, huh?

A lot of people expect you to climb the heights of Mount Kilimanjaro to grab the tears of an angel to make them tea out of for the first date, lol. And you know right away that they aren't there for you or to get to know you, most of the time.
 TapatiaQueen
Joined: 11/3/2010
Msg: 119
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 4:46:38 AM
mmmm

most of the time speciaIIy on first dates i pay MY own meaI but if the guy insist
i Iet him pay, i wont Iie it feeIs nice that a guy wants to take care of you for me its not about the money its the intention .
 RichenLosAngeles
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 120
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 8:28:09 AM
Really now,, How much do two coffees at Starbux cost? I am beating the bushes to find the love of my life. Should I bitsh about this expense?
Come on, guys.
STEP UP !!
 frijolera_ninja
Joined: 4/11/2011
Msg: 121
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 12:30:32 PM
I have a friend like that. Shell order the most expensive thing on the menu even if its something she doesnt like! Shes super beautiful and takes advantage... just once Id love to see a guy excuse himself to use the bathroom and skip out leaving her with the bill!
 RichenLosAngeles
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 122
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 12:53:19 PM
Ninja - Your friend's behavior is shameful. But realistically, the biggest item at Starbux is less than $5, so I could still handle a byotch like her.
Well, it would have to be on Saturday, because I get paid on Friday. But hey,, live large, that's my motto!!!
 LoveLaughterLie
Joined: 6/21/2011
Msg: 123
Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 3:46:33 PM
First date, a man is expected to treat the lady, that's just how it is, man. I mean, you feel privileged, to take her out, right? If you don't then, she's not the one!
 Jennywillwin
Joined: 12/27/2011
Msg: 124
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Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 8:10:12 PM
I would prefer NOT to go on a expensive first date myself so there is no problem if I feel like I should pay half. I haven't had many first dates so I don't have much experience. I know I would feel uncomfortable though if a big check was up for debate so better to avoid it completely.
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 125
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Should Guys pay the full amount on the first Date/Meet?
Posted: 1/4/2012 10:10:49 PM

What happened to the days where you just held hands and talked while taking a stroll, huh?


That's exactly why under 'first date' in my profile I have that I prefer to grab some coffee and talk and maybe go for a walk and see where the time goes. I want to get to know someone. Well, that and I reall like starbucks. LOL I'm cool with a dinner to talk, but I really would rather just sitting at starbucks and talking.
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