Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > How can I get my ex back      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 sunshinefun25
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 15
How can I get my ex backPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I thought your post was the nicest. You seem to have compassion for others that are hurting and i appreciate that. I liked your post! I am letting him go. I haven't texted, called or any contact whatsoever since that day he said we done. Thank You!
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 16
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 9/30/2011 9:33:12 AM
Wow you think we are being cold because we told you something you didn't like? that's not the way it works , when you post something on a public forum expect answers you may not want to hear or agree with .

You are hurting I get that, I don't like to see people hurt, but you need to take responsibility too, you're on a dating site looking to date and you're in love with the ex, ask your self is that fair to the next guy? how would you feel if you met a guy who treats you like a queen, he treats you with respect, you have fun with and then you find out he's still in love with his ex?
how would that make you feel?

You asked a question " how can I get my ex back?" the answer is YOU CANT, its either he wants to be with you or he doesn't , actions speak louder than words and his actions dictate he doesn't, when a man goes through someone phone to check what messages you are receiving is a indication he doesn't trust you, trust is a important element in ANY relationship, I don't care how good the sex is, or if he gets along with your friends and family and vice versa, NO trust NO relationship can exist.

Personally if you stay on the site, you should maybe research some of the threads that deals with your situation and see how others has handled it, you need to end all contact with this guy, Im betting within 6 months he contacts you with " oh I miss you , and it was a mistake" and you will find out his relationship with the woman has ended
 sunshinefun25
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 17
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 9/30/2011 9:43:21 AM
I am not leading anyone on on this site.. My profile is hidden and any guy that i have talked to knows my situation. I thought it would help to just have someone to get to know as friends. I guess noone agrees with this.

There were trust issues and i guess he had something going on for him to be insecure with us because i never once talked to another man while he and i were dating.

I am not contacting him anymore, I made that choice when he told me it was over. I just got on here hoping to have friends that went through the same things and get myself out there so my mind isnt on him.

Thanks for your uplifting post!
 cajunbleu
Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 18
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 9/30/2011 10:31:22 AM
True love can NEVER exist WITHOUT honesty, respect and TRUST; all 3 criteria MUST be there. And if BOTH have neither for the other---then there is NO RELATIONSHIP.

This guy has NONE of these things for YOU. I know it hurts NOW, but time heals the pain. You're better off without this guy.
 sunshinefun25
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 19
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 9/30/2011 10:48:37 AM
Yeah, and i just cant figure out why he has no trust. I never done anything to make him think i was talking to other men. The profile that i had on pof was before us. But youre right. No relationship can work without trust. He had a bad childhood where his mom left him at a young age and his step mom was always mean to him, slapping him, etc.. Then she walked out, and never heard from her again... He don't trust women and i know I cant change this. I will get over it with time and im sure in the long run I will be happier with someone else.
 maddy69
Joined: 3/15/2011
Msg: 20
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/2/2011 10:04:30 AM
Just try and go about your business,i know you love him and miss him,but as long as he knows your hurting he also knows that right now he has the upper hand and whatever he is doing when he is done will know you will be there to take him back.so go out walk the beach see friends or whatever and dont let him think your sitting home crying over him,if he loves you he will come back if not your better off and one day someone better will come your way, alot of us been there done that and i am still hurting after 4 months but i have met someone new and moving on(trying to),,,and yes he misses you as much as you do him men just dont show emotions like woman do,DONT CALL HIM,TEXT HIM,NOR BEG FOR HIM TO COME BACK,ESPECIALLY SAY SORRY FOR SOMETHING YOU DIDNT DO, LET HIM WONDER WHAT YOUR DOING AND SEE IF HE CALLS,IF NOT THAN SOMEONE BETTER WILL COME YOUR WAY,GOOD LUCK AND YOUR NOT ALONE IN THE BROKEN HEART LIST.
 Noneya1174
Joined: 9/27/2011
Msg: 21
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/3/2011 5:41:01 PM
Oh hunny you have captured my life. Listen from someone who talks the talk but never walks the walk. I have been playing this game with a man for 6 years and hoping we would make it thru. DONT END UP LIKE ME 6 Years down the road still chasing him. The longer you think about him and the longer you try to contact him the more depressed and desperate you become. I wish you the best of luck and hope you are a stronger person than me. Im still working on letting go...
 sunshinefun25
Joined: 9/25/2011
Msg: 22
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/4/2011 5:08:19 AM
Thanks so much for your posts. It does hurt and i know i have to move on... He contacted me after almost a week and a half to say he needed to bring some things over that i had left at his house. (an excuse because he missed me) He did come over, and he held me so tight and showed so much love to me. No, I didn't act desperate and needy, but he grabbed me and held on... For a while... Continuously kissing my head, and rubbing my back...(much more to the story, but i gotta keep it short) I could feel his love!! :) but its sad... He has a new girlfriend that he really likes and she really likes her, so... Why did he wanna see me when he's so happy with someone new? I dont get it, but ok... It felt good to see him, but now i gotta do it again.... Yep. NO CONTACT AGAIN!! :( I will get over it! I will always love him, but I know i will get stronger with time> Thanks everyone! :)
 LoveBites78
Joined: 9/13/2011
Msg: 23
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/4/2011 8:16:42 AM
check ur inbox hun...I sent you a msg xo
 Riverdog322
Joined: 10/5/2009
Msg: 24
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/6/2011 1:25:08 PM
I'd like to give a Big Thanks to the 2 following people that always seem to have really good advice and things to say on these Forums and they are "Cdn_Iceman" and "U make it entertaining". While I know the people they are responding to don't always like what they have to say, both of them seem to nail it each time. Good to get the perspective from a female and male as well and I've taken into account what they have said to others and processed it into the relationship problems I am seem to have. You 2 should be relatinship counselors if you aren't already!

Regarding Sunshine's situation it's time for the dreaded "NC" period. I know as I am going through this now and it sucks but it must be done! You have to get on with your life and show him you are okay on your own. Nobody likes someone that is needy and boy I made that bad mistake. You need to be confident and know that time heals everything and your life will get better and you'll find someone new if that's what is meant to be.

Keep the faith and believe in yourself and everything will work out!
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 25
view profile
History
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/6/2011 2:21:15 PM
Like this will be heeded. .....


Here.. i'll just cut to the chase and tell you what you want to hear.. Yes he'll come back and everything will be lovely and magical and there will be leprechauns riding on unicorns that are farting rainbows and skittles, they shall prance thru the enchanted meadow where flowers are to be eaten and taste like candy... there feel better?

Now for reality... Turn around and look at the bridge you just crossed.. now pick up that gallon of gas you have been carrying with you pour it all over that bridge and then light a match and watch it burst into flames.. chant BURN BABY BURN!!... Then get to walking down the road and getting on with your life.

Do you REALLY want to be with someone that exemplified such behavior ? Do you?

C'mon.. don't you deserve better?.. you are not in love with HIM.. you are in love with what he represented.. your hopes,your dreams,etc... you still have those. He is gone. Wish him well,even if it's thru clenched teeth and get to hoofing it. The longer you wallow in pity and despair the harder it is going to be for you and the longer until you come to the realization that YOU are the only one who can make you happy.


So what's it gonna be?
 wildandfreee
Joined: 12/16/2010
Msg: 26
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/7/2011 3:48:59 AM
what i think is the man doesnt trust you anymore, i dont know the level of your relationship, i understand the issue about dating site but some people would not tolerate that crap either, i am not saying you are lying , another reason i think is the little fight you face as well i dont know who is right or wrong , sure he will move on if he gets attention of other girls , what i think is may be time can fix that, and the type of communication you both have, wish you good luck
 wildandfreee
Joined: 12/16/2010
Msg: 27
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/7/2011 3:49:17 AM
what i think is the man doesnt trust you anymore, i dont know the level of your relationship, i understand the issue about dating site but some people would not tolerate that crap either, i am not saying you are lying , another reason i think is the little fight you face as well i dont know who is right or wrong , sure he will move on if he gets attention of other girls , what i think is may be time can fix that, and the type of communication you both have, wish you good luck
 home_osorio
Joined: 2/12/2011
Msg: 28
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 10/19/2011 6:26:01 AM
I think you guys love each other. And I honestly do not know what to do in this type of situation.
 baddkitty4u
Joined: 6/10/2011
Msg: 29
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 11/4/2011 10:19:38 PM
Huh? I would rather be alone than to be treated like your x has treated you. Have some respect for yourself...then you will receive respect from others. I'm just sayin. ;-)
 SleepyMcGee
Joined: 5/16/2008
Msg: 30
view profile
History
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/13/2011 8:07:43 AM
You sound super clingy. He sounds jealous. You both are a bit crazy but not in a good way.

Move on. Work on yourself before you get into another relationship.
 stewartmmike
Joined: 3/24/2011
Msg: 31
view profile
History
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:07:04 PM
ZZZZZZZ

Waaaah

ZZZZZZZ
 ixtlan09
Joined: 12/12/2010
Msg: 32
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/27/2011 2:20:09 PM
Here's how you get him back. Find some well endowed gentlemen. Then make nasty, hardcore, no punches pulled, full length porno with these guys. Burn DVD's and mail them to your ex.

Men are visual. This will make him want you more than ever.
 Eeasylover
Joined: 10/10/2011
Msg: 33
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/27/2011 4:56:21 PM
A Chinese philosopher once said;
"A man can never stand in the same stream twice, for the waters are always moving"

Translation; no matter how hard you try you can never recoup the past, once it has lived it is gone and can never come back.

I f you are too shattered to move on and find someone new then you must accept the fact that being with the one you want will be different....very different than it was before.
 borazon
Joined: 11/29/2011
Msg: 34
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/29/2011 8:34:29 PM
If you really love your ex then you should wait for him.He will come back to you.I know a lot of people will say its impractical and you should move on but I believe in platonic love.Wait for some time and if he doesn't come back,the feeling for him will eventually go away but I would advice against dating someone new now.
 jeep1127girl
Joined: 12/31/2009
Msg: 35
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 12/31/2011 12:00:52 PM
Who wants an ex back? Ex is an ex for a reason..
 Colemin8r
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 36
view profile
History
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 1/25/2012 4:59:08 AM
I empathise with the OP and would certainly not envy being in her situation.

However, posting on a forum doesn't necessarily guarantee everyone will back the OP up on their opinion, and of course we're seeing this from an independent third party viewpoint, which - taking emotion out of it for a second - looks to me like:

* relationship has been going for 2 years with regular arguments;
* Despite ups and downs, the man has ended the relationship;
* The woman does not want to accept that the relationship has ended.

Use the metaphor of playing tug of war with one end tied to a mountain. No matter how hard one pulls on the rope, the mountain isn't going to get closer, despite all the effort that is made. However, if one lets go of the rope, an overwhelming weight is lifted. My advice: drop the rope before realising (once completely exhausted from the effort) that the mountain won't move.
 ixtlan09
Joined: 12/12/2010
Msg: 37
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 1/27/2012 5:16:46 PM
Buy the following things: hd video record, dvd burner, sexy outfit, and a hood. Then get about a dozen of your best looking male acquaintances. Put on the sexy outfit and the hood. Have sex with all your male acquaintances at the same time, as dirty and raunchy as you can take it, filming the entire thing. At then end, stand up facing the camera, rip of the hood, and say "It's me, baby!".

Burn the video to dvd and mail it to him anonymously. When he watches it he'll get so turn on, then surprised when he realized it's you, that he'll come running back to you.

And, please, don't thank me. I'm just glad I could help.
 tysdaddy
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 38
How can I get my ex back
Posted: 1/29/2012 12:02:17 AM
Ive been going thru the same thing as you except on the girl end and around the same time. We wasnt together long but for me it was love at 1st sight and ive known her a long time. Anyways we was engaged for a cpl of weeks and then i ended it thinking thats what she wanted so i gave it to her. Ive been down for months havent talked to her in a few weeks she was my everything and im still trying to fig it out. She has moved on and dating some new guy and prolly is happier i dont know all i know is we have to fig out how to move on. I like you would love to have her back and for her to be mine forever but that is up to GOD! im not a huge religious person but its true just gotta take it one day at a time and find some kind of happiness in life. Im still looking for mine but i hope you find yours!!
Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > How can I get my ex back