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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(      Home login  
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 mysteriosa
Joined: 5/19/2006
Msg: 16
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newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
It doesn't sound right to me. He is keeping himself to himself, literally! Perhaps he's lost interest in sex with you. Perhaps he's gay and he wanted the rest of the relationship but the sex is no longer of interest unless he can indulge his fantasies. Personally, I'd be very offended if my guy did this and I'd be thinking of walking.
 _shakti_
Joined: 7/5/2011
Msg: 17
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/14/2011 5:29:24 PM
I had a good friend whose husband would masturbate beside her in bed nightly. He would wait until he thought she was sleeping.. but she knew. And was quite distraught about it. Eventually she decided to reach over and try to insinuate herself into things- he would actually push her away and finish on his own!!

Maybe I'm a bit biased by that story, but I would be very concerned!

And yeah, this will affect your self esteem. It's hard to come back from too.
 ZachariahTicer
Joined: 9/22/2010
Msg: 18
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newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/14/2011 6:12:12 PM
OP kind of a duplicate thread...

http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts14737634.aspx

Shakti in that example I think masturbation was a problem, and I can understand that women's frustration (to say the least)!

If two people have different sex drive then they could have a healthy sex life together but one of them still masturbates on the side. I have a high sex drive so I have been in that situation myself.
 Revilors
Joined: 10/9/2008
Msg: 19
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/14/2011 6:46:39 PM

Eh..I'd go with; "a talk" ...and if unsuccessful..."the walk".


"The talk" is simply due notice of "the walk".


: I had a good friend whose husband would masturbate beside her in bed nightly. He would wait until he thought she was sleeping.. but she knew. And was quite distraught about it. Eventually she decided to reach over and try to insinuate herself into things- he would actually push her away and finish on his own!!


A peek into OP's probable future?

"Is it possible that there are no coincidences? " ~ Signs
 femaleandflirty
Joined: 7/16/2011
Msg: 20
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/14/2011 11:39:28 PM
I would say he is no longer in love with you. You are perhaps too familiar and around too much....No man prefers masturbating to a real woman he desires.
He may love you but he no longer really fancies you...
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 21
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newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/15/2011 4:58:07 AM
Maybe he's just done, but as I was trying to figure out how to say earlier, I think that the masturbation isn't the CAUSE of the problem, it's an additional SYMPTOM of it.

Either your relationship is really over, and you are in a holding pattern, or he's going through something either to do directly WITH you, or something that he can't connect with you about for some reason. Anyway you look at it, the problem is a big one, and wont be fixed by "tricks."
 chippyandchukka
Joined: 9/13/2011
Msg: 22
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/15/2011 6:58:20 PM
Igor: Your opinions are just nonscence!! u r halarius...... and i thank you for the great laughs... poor girl who ends up with you!!!! such a blamer!!!LMAO!!!!
 goodquestion
Joined: 6/29/2005
Msg: 23
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/16/2011 3:38:49 AM
Igor: Your opinions are just nonscence!! u r halarius...... and i thank you for the great laughs... poor girl who ends up with you!!!! such a blamer!!!LMAO!!!!

While I have read all the posts and all have some very good insight they all have the same theme. IGOR has definately hit the mark, however everyone is handleing it as they see it and do not want to face it head on and pretend it is something not as serious in respect to the actual problem. There for we go for the easy way out. KAYLI, you are very right in your post as in all your posts. A problem like this needs to be looked at from a outside third set of ears or eyes if someone really cares on both sides, since it sounds far removed from the basic standard every day reasons. If he does not care well then it is really over. Also we do not have every bit of information needed to really render what is going on here. Just my take on it.
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 24
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/18/2011 5:17:15 AM
Obviously things are not as great as you say they are...If you want sex and he won't provide...then tell him to beat it! ...On second thought, tell him to take off!
 3xsacharmsotheysay
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 25
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/18/2011 6:21:24 AM
Life is too short to not be content sexually with your partner. I am afraid that his behavior and the fact that he's into just satisfying only himself will spead into other parts of the relationship. With enough time people usually end up showing their true personality. Your getting a good look at who this guy really is and how you will be treated. Get out now!
 anti_hero
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 26
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/19/2011 9:56:44 AM
Bahahhaha what a w@nker ...

Lose the guy that likes the "dishonorable discharge"
and hook yourself up with a normal bloke .. one thats not batting off all the time ,err clearly he has to much time on err his hands .. do have a question tho .. does one of his arms look like popeye's ?
 ZachariahTicer
Joined: 9/22/2010
Msg: 27
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newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/19/2011 3:19:53 PM

Men only masterbatte when they feel like their not getting what they want outta sex

So your husband masturbate's only when he is not getting what he wants.


I give him what he wants (sometimes).

Sometimes he doesn't get what he wants. So he masturbates.


But us woman masterbate too so why is it such a big deal tho..

You didn't stop for your husband?
 1234deleted1234
Joined: 10/8/2009
Msg: 28
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/19/2011 3:33:48 PM
Ladyluvv22 may have a point to a degree...

At least from my experience...towards the end of my marriage I was going for a world record...and thought I had a porn addiction or something.
Later, after the divorce when I was dating some freaky chicks, I had zero interest in porn and almost never masturbated...
 goodquestion
Joined: 6/29/2005
Msg: 29
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 10/19/2011 4:06:44 PM
Men only masterbatte when they feel like their not getting what they want outta sex

This is definately not true.
,
they fantazise about what they want when they masterbate

Also not true
,
my husband stopped masterbatting.

I don't believe it for one minute.

I give him what he wants sometimes

If you give him what he wants the word sometimes would not even enter the picture.
But us woman masterbate too so why is it such a big deal tho..

I don't recall it ever being a big deal
 WFforDarkMate
Joined: 1/1/2011
Msg: 30
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/10/2012 5:21:10 PM
fotoman, she said she is used to it daily, so her libido is not at issue. i would hope his testosterone is higher than hers!! since she isn't supposed to have much of that at all, not our hormone as women, estrogen and progestrin thank you very much. her complaint was his lack of desire for sex, not his lack of desire to masturbate. since one doesnt necessarily mean the other. sex with someone is a different desire than release. masturbation requires no intimacy with another.
 hotmerlot
Joined: 2/25/2012
Msg: 31
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/10/2012 7:10:39 PM
I think you made him feel like a pervert for masturbating and now he is not comfortable being intimate with you. Men need to feel secure, just like women do.
 chosefun
Joined: 10/26/2011
Msg: 32
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newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/10/2012 7:37:53 PM
I seem to be in the same relationship. After talking with my partner, I think Igor is right. I have a high sex drive, meaning I could have sex with my guy and still please myself in the same day. After a few months of dating (5-6) I couldn't understanding why we were having less and less sex (from everyday to three times a week). He told me he wanted me to make the move first once and a while and I think holding him up to the standards of when we first met was alot of pressure. I in turn took it as he was losing interest or my drive was too much. We don't have as much sex as when we first met, I have no problem masterbating while he watches either. Turns me on and him. I guess I have learned to compromise without taking it personal. Is he masterbating without me? could be, less work when he is tired. Doesn't mean he doesn't desire me nor me him.
 Lionesse19
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 33
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/11/2012 4:05:49 PM
Just dont think he is into you so much anymore. Do you live together? Familiarity can breed contempt. Why is he whacking off daily rather than be with you?? I dont get it. He is being selfish and many a woman would be gone.
 bigcalm
Joined: 3/14/2012
Msg: 34
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/11/2012 10:40:24 PM
Hands strokes over vigina pounding, no that's a problem.

No man masturbates daily with a woman to have sex with. He has problems.
 baldguy500
Joined: 2/9/2010
Msg: 35
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/12/2012 3:03:59 AM
he jerks off because it feels better than corking you is my guess...may i suggest that you RAM a blunt object up his rear end, if he screams then repeat several times....if he doesn't scream, then dump him...he's gay
 Mfforal3
Joined: 4/25/2010
Msg: 36
newer relationship HELP he masturbates daily and now no sex :(
Posted: 5/12/2012 2:47:48 PM
@ OP: First off ...there is nothing wrong with him masturbating daily. What is wrong is that he's not having sex with you. It's a red flag for sure.. That is something you guys need to discuss together, and if you can't do this then it's not a relationship worth wasting both of your times over....(it's only 7 months for pete's sake).

Now as far as the men saying it's "not true" that men think about something they aren't getting sexually while masturbating. B.S. I say!!! I would like one man to tell me that they think of their gf/wife "ONLY" and sexual experiences you have "ONLY" thus far experienced with your gf/wife .. when cranking one off!! And of course ladies you are not innocent in this venue either..haha! (it's normal)...

As far as masturbating and having a regular partner as well... My wife and I have been together for 21 years, we have sex 3-4 times a week on average...I still masturbate on average 3 times a week and so does my wife...and guess what??..I'm thinking about a different woman, her with a woman that I've already viewed, her with a different woman, or just a girl on girl of random...And my wife is probably doing the same!! Big Deal!!...That may have been TMI but come on peeps be real!! geesh!

Cheers!
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