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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Do guys actually date single mothers?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Josephscott1
Joined: 10/18/2011
Msg: 76
Do guys actually date single mothers?Page 4 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
As a guy in my early 20's i did date a women with a kid. Granted she didnt tell me tell later, and also she was pregnet with an ex's kid as she told me a little more down the road. That big old decision making process started and i thought and thought until i decided to stay with her. I tried my best, i went or tired to go to all baby events during pregency etc etc. I was actually exicited for a good while, until she told me she didnt have enough time for me anymore.


If u want some tips when trying to find a man and u have a kid do these things.

Tell him upfront-- it will weed out men who can do it and cant right away.

What ever you do dont tell him your kid will always come first--- we all know your kid will come first even if he was the real father but saying it like that will turn guys away plain and simple.

Never tell him u dont expect him to take care of your kids or dont need him too---If he wants to be with u then he is going to have to want to be with your kids also, if he doesnt then well probbley wont work. some guys like the responsability and it shows that u trust him and want him their.

And further more lower your damn expections, sorry their isnt enough rich handsome funny built tall dark guys around that want kids.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 77
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 1:50:54 AM

And further more lower your damn expections, sorry their isnt enough rich handsome funny built tall dark guys around that want kids.


I met a man that fit that description to a perfect T when i was a younger single Mom of 1.........we got married & he fathered my second child.
 dad2stay
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 78
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 10:29:50 AM
Iceman and ice queen, wow what a pair,

Please reread what you quoted. I never said silver said this, I said he is one person I was responding to about the others who had said it, geeze do you seriously have nothing better to do than troll these boards picking fights?

Also queen you are definitely a Troll by every definition at least iceman has good points in-between his insults unlike you who just rambles incoherently

The moderators should just delete any thread you post to and avoid allot of pointless bickering
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 79
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 10:39:36 AM
Again with the off topic stuff ? I said please copy and paste what Silver wrote, that is all that I said its kind of simple dad2stay, If I ask for directions Los Angelos from Miami Florida, I'm asking for direction, I'm not asking the ratio of dogs to cats, or the weather, or the homicide rate or even ratios of KFC to Popeye's I'm just asking for directions.

So again, please post what silver said about him coming first in a relationship?
 dad2stay
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 80
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 11:38:57 AM
Msg: 56


Great!! I'm happy to see you don't have a problem being a doormat then and don't mind coming in second or third or fourth in the hierarchy. You'll make a perfect match for those moms that say their kids come first.


Iceman I really do not know why you continue to try to start debates do you seriously have nothing better to do with your time?

 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 81
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 12:13:08 PM
And I agree with Silver and what he said, but read his other posts he has his girlfriend( long time girlfriend not A WOMAN HE MET) as equal footing, and he said his kids are important.

You just have selective reading and comprehension and when you don't agree with someone you tend to attack and then complain people are attacking you.
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 82
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 12:34:56 PM
Actually Hammer I have 4 godchildren, ( 3 goddaughter and 1 god son) that is a lot eh? lol
and they are good kids with a amazing future ahead of them.
 MsAmanda41
Joined: 10/17/2011
Msg: 83
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 12:35:37 PM
Date older! do you really want to date a 22 year old guy? Have you met most of them? If they don't have a kid, they are immature and cannot possibly fathom what we go through as parents. I've found dating older or dating a guy with a kid is the only way that it works. Because by the time men are older, most of them have some sort of "baggage" anyways. Which baggage is an awful word because everyone has a past! I'm a single mom too and I've found I had to change my criteria a little bit to find someone worth my time. But I've been lucky, all the guys I've dated don't care I have had a kid and I've been the one to have to tell the ones I'm not interested in "See ya!" . And It helps to start on the foot as a woman. Be honest on your page and say you have a child, then you don't have to bring it up again and you have already been honest! Most men will see you have a child and the ones that are interested will let you know.
Good luck!!! Hope it goes well :-)
 dad2stay
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 84
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 1:14:09 PM
Yes ice I know, I acknowledged that, you asked me to quote what he said, so I did what you requested

Why are you still looking to drag this out? Seems you are the one with selective reading, if you red my posts you see I repeatedly referred to others who have posted that they will settle for nothing but to be #1 in their new partners eyes even above kids, Silver and I were discussing something different

God man get a life
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 85
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 1:20:34 PM
Nasty arent we? and you call your self a nice guy? pffft

EDIT FOR BELOW:


Nasty?? Seriously ice grow up, stop trying to pick fights.
Its Cdn_Iceman ...slick. get over your self slick, when you call me out I respond to the call out , if you expect me to be some lay down sally, you picked the wrong guy slick.



 dad2stay
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 86
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 1:37:50 PM
Stop trolling Ice, stay on topic. Remember you found me, you insult more than anyone else i see on this board
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 87
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 3:43:20 PM

Stop trolling Ice, stay on topic. Remember you found me, you insult more than anyone else i see on this board
then stop calling me out Pal, you like to play these games you want to challenge what Ive said please feel free.

On topic, Some guys will date single moms, and some guys wont, the OP looks like shes getting her life in order with school, has a good head on her shoulder and upcoming teachers position , just stay the course and be patient.

Online dating can be funny, its takes a bit of luck, patience, lots of chap stick and troll repellant I have some for sale if you need some, it will ward off the swamp donkeys , Im working on something to ward off whack jobs but its in the development stage.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 88
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 3:48:25 PM

The father is NOT in the picture ... this is bonus


This is one reason why I tend to date single fathers.

IMO, that is such a selfish thing to say! I know you probably mean well, and wholeheartedly, feel that its great for the child to have 2 parents to co-parent, but I still think it was a pretty sucky selfish thing to say.

I had a pretty good friendship with my ex's x wife. In fact, when we first met, he told me, "you arent supposed to get along that great with the x wife"
 1boyplustwins
Joined: 1/29/2011
Msg: 89
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/25/2011 9:08:45 PM
I have been told they do, but I am begining to think it is a myth.
 Businessman6969
Joined: 10/16/2011
Msg: 90
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/26/2011 12:04:40 AM
Personally, I'd date a woman with children, but some guys do automatically picture instant children as an added financial burden which guys might not want.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 91
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/26/2011 10:33:56 AM
Your fiancee passed or her grandson? Im sorry to hear of your loss.

I really dont put any stipulations on dating, other than the obvious (no addicts of any kind, mentally stable, faithful, morals/values). If they are single fathers its a plus for me, as that is my preference. I'll try out a single man with no kids, but, I just find not much of a connection because they are more "free" than I am, and Ive found it to be tougher to maintain. Im not going to stress about wondering why it wont work, and I especially wont wonder if its my status. Im a carefree fun spirited woman, dont have time to waste on it.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 92
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/26/2011 12:27:51 PM
its idiotic to speak of your single mom status as "baggage".
 Cash7819
Joined: 9/27/2011
Msg: 93
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/26/2011 4:32:17 PM
Well, I think it has to do with the society in which you live or where you're from. This is America and everyone is typically concern about him/herself. Most...not all guys in their early and even late 20s are just out there for fun....counting how many girls they have splet with. Their hope is not to be tied down by another man's responsibility. Maybe you should try dating someone from a different country and see the difference!
 cogetoergo
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 94
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/27/2011 12:28:09 AM
Rivergirl may be speaking the truth. As someone who has personal insight into the male psyche, because I am one...a man is not even close to having a CLUE if he isn't a father. He's not even in the same neighborhood. And it's not even enough to be a father, he must be an active partisipant. If you're any kind of good man, kids will keep your bearings.
But do not dispair my young single mother. There are men out there with functioning compasses.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 95
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/27/2011 1:27:27 AM

...a man is not even close to having a CLUE if he isn't a father. He's not even in the same neighborhood.


From my own personal experience, i respectfully disagree.
I have dated primarily childfree men. Nothing against the single Dads, i just always end up with men who happen to not have children. 2 special men in my life...the first being my deceased husband, the second being my current boyfriend, have been very, very, very good to my babies. And absolutely amazing parental figures, although they had no children. Well, my husband did have a child later on, with me, lol, but i came into the marriage with one child from a past fling, and he came into the marriage childfree.

We were blessed with a child together during our marriage, & he treated my Daughter just as lovingly as he treated the child we had together. They were both his kids, & he was a loving doting Father to both of them equally..... even though one had his DNA and one did not.

Both men, loving, mature, stable, great with kids, very respectful & understanding of my role as a Mother, & excellent role models for the kids, and very capable of parenting the kids.
 CarKam1
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 96
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/27/2011 11:05:46 AM

No. None of them do. We have an invisible mark on us that reads "single mom. do not date"


lmao!


I can have the best connection with someone and the second I tell them about my son, they lose interest. Are they immature?


That there is the issue. If they do not know you have a child prior to the date then you are wasting your time and theirs. The men who don't mind a young single mother will contact you, but you have to be honest right from the start.
 dad2stay
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 97
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/27/2011 1:56:13 PM

Do guys actually date single mothers?


No, absolutely not!!!

No man would ever date a person with kids

Anyone ever hear of the title step father????

If men haven't and wouldn't date a woman who has kids how exactly would that title come into play?
 ksull72487
Joined: 10/21/2011
Msg: 98
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/27/2011 7:20:43 PM
Yes, they will. Chances are it will be more difficult for you and you'll notice a lot less men willing to. But that dosen't mean they won't. I know I would if felt the girl was right. There are couple of things to remember. Single mothers have their work cut out for them undoubtedly. But for a single man to date one he also has to accept that knowing that if things go to another level he would have to take some part in that responsibility as well. So in short he's losing some of the freedom on a child that isn't his if things lead up to a bigger relationship. Most men probably wouldn't care too much but it does initially raise some red flags until he decides if this would work. (Ex: Woman with kids, guy thinks well if it goes far ill have to do my part,its going to cost more money, less free time and the kids not mine). Don't give up but you have to remember its a unique situation that will require a bit more work.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 99
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/28/2011 12:14:55 PM
"Do guys actually date single mothers?"

dad2stay says "No, absolutely not!!!" then goes on to say "Anyone ever hear of the title step father????"

Now color me crazy, but are you saying there is NOT a single woman with kids who just wants to date?? That's plain insane and myopic! He11 the topic on the thread is do guys actually "DATE" single mothers!!

I perused the past few pages, you as self appointed spokesman for single mothers seems absurd! In your view everyone must walk lock step with your views or...

That title may NEVER come into play, they may meet, date for a while because they are attracted to each other, then split.

No rule in anyones life is absolute! Life is a fluid thing, it changes, needs change, situations change, that you can so self assuredly speak for a whole group of people is ridiculous. I know I know, you have been trained, have friends who blah blah blah!!

You can bay at the moon and the stars, you can growl and gnash your teeth, when you take EVERYONE and lump them in a single pile, with no freedom of choice, you have become a dictator, not an advocate.

Kids are important, kids need direction, when you assert that they are the end all be all, in every decision a woman makes, you're wrong.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 100
Do guys actually date single mothers?
Posted: 10/28/2011 12:43:53 PM
dad2stay says "No, absolutely not!!!" then goes on to say "Anyone ever hear of the title step father????"

Now color me crazy, but are you saying there is NOT a single woman with kids who just wants to date?? That's plain insane and myopic! He11 the topic on the thread is do guys actually "DATE" single mothers!!


you missed his sarcasm entirely...
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Do guys actually date single mothers?