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 earthboundangel67
Joined: 9/2/2011
Msg: 93
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically InterestedPage 4 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
I think that as others have mentioned, to each their own. People will do what they feel is best for them. You have to decide what that is for you. I personally only reply if I am interested in getting to know someone better, with romantic potential. I am not here to waste my time or anyone elses. Dont have it to waste. Am also not interested in just chat or email or looking for friends....I have plenty of people in my life, and for me, this is a site to meet eligible men....even though they are few & far between. If they have read my profile, they know quite a bit about me already, as well as what I am seeking. I do at times respond to a well written email, or to someone who has complimented me. But, I do not feel the need to reply to every single email. I do not feel this is rude. I simply do not feel I need to lead them on or there is no common ground . I am never rude or disrespectful to others, unless they go there first....then I simply block & move on. There are the good , the bad & the ugly online. Sometimes you never know which until you respond unfavorably and they blast you for not being interested in them. It is a challenge. I think you have to do what you feel is best for you. Nobody can tell you what that is. Good luck.
 Nyte2008
Joined: 12/29/2009
Msg: 94
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/8/2011 3:50:36 PM
I didn't know that blocking someone too much gets them banned. In that case, don't block them.

Just send them that message I said and ignore everything else from them. If they are harassing you, then block them.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 95
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/8/2011 5:44:46 PM

If somebody is SOOOOOO fragile that either a "thanks but no thanks" response or no reply at all "hurts" them then they should reconsider whether internet dating is for them really IMO


She was talking about the fact that x number of blocks gets your p[rofile booted from the system. Of course; there is the fact that most non repliers or insta blockers dont care if it kills someones dog; as long as they 'aint' hittin on "them".
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 96
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/8/2011 9:32:42 PM
Of course; there is the fact that most non repliers or insta blockers dont care if it kills someones dog; as long as they 'aint' hittin on "them".


Hey, don't lump the non repliers into the same category as insta blockers----they are NOT the same thing.

Not replying to a message from someone who doesn't interest you is not committing an act of aggression against them---whereas blocking them is.
 Natgoat
Joined: 3/24/2011
Msg: 97
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/9/2011 12:10:52 AM
Not to be redundant...but...
'Etiquette'...??...Here..??!! Surely, you jest.....
Most people here can't spell ~Manners~...let alone Etiquette..!!

Just say.."Sorry...I don't feel a connection." or even as simple as "Thanks, but no thanks."
That's a LOT more than I got back from over a hundred Very polite notes..!
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 99
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 2:22:44 AM

It's simply mind boggling the amount of dreamers on this site


Bless their souls bro


=====================================================================================================================
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 100
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 1:19:11 PM
The classy ladies who replied to me but weren't interested replied ONCE to my original letter... and thanked me for taking the effort to write... but they also mentioned "I don't think we'll be a good match, good luck, etc..." and left it at that. It's a decent way to refuse and you are gracious in your thanks to seeing them make an effort, but at the same time, tell them firmly your true feelings.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 102
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 5:22:47 PM

people should be smart enough to read a profile and not waste others time. if you dont meet what that person wants dont waste their time or yours simple.


EXACTLY!

If you aint a "fun loving", "attractive" "Good hearted' person; 'who likes kids', and 'has strong values'....just screw off!!

 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 103
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 8:20:31 PM
Who cares if you aren't 'romantically' interested in them. Talk to people like a normal person.

If you're not interested, then a normal person would say thanks, but not interested -- not carry on a conversation "to be nice" then in the end, drop off. That's called leading someone on if they hit you up with a fan mail piece (so to speak). But it isn't real life in the sense that they're standing in front of you. They're not in your personal space -- there's no need to respond. When everyone cost-free could see a "Read Deleted" there was definitely no need to respond, and responding with a "not interested" would just restate the obvious.

Blocking anyone is for children. Who gives a damn if they keep emailing. Ignore them and delete the emails.

Blocking IS ignoring them, though. If a gal gets a ton of emails in her inbox, she probably has her hands full deleting and sorting it out as it is -- if someone sends a 2nd email shortly thereafter, just delete and block, so it will ignore any futures for ya. Such people do deserve a block.

No one says you have to meet or date anyone off here.

And no one says you have an obligation to write back to every fan mail piece rolling in, either. Especially given that too many people respond unkindly to a nice "thanks, but not interested" type response. And they don't know how you'll be, so, why expect them to respond? Again, not in personal space -- not turning their back on you -- they dropped of a little note in your virtual mailbox among many other notes others have.

I could care less what a person has to say.

Then why have an obligation to respond in any way?
 cesska
Joined: 11/7/2011
Msg: 104
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 8:29:08 PM
the answer is I AM JUST HERE 4 THE FORUMS
 Texan_Gal
Joined: 10/22/2011
Msg: 105
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/13/2011 8:38:55 PM

Just say.."Sorry...I don't feel a connection." or even as simple as "Thanks, but no thanks."
That's a LOT more than I got back from over a hundred Very polite notes..!

I just sent a "Thanks for the message, but I'm not interested" tonight and got a response calling me a $2 white whore. These guys are why more women don't respond with a polite message of disinterest.
 Nyte2008
Joined: 12/29/2009
Msg: 106
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/14/2011 6:47:54 AM

the answer is I AM JUST HERE 4 THE FORUMS


This woman is a god. Listen to her folks...
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 107
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/14/2011 7:08:40 AM

and got a response calling me a $2 white whore


Isnt advertising against the rules?

(couldnt resist)

But how rude, you'd be worth more than that, well into the 10s of dollars at least
 Debisusanne
Joined: 5/3/2011
Msg: 109
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/14/2011 7:31:05 AM
I get soooo many short messages.. From people who don't say a whole lot on their profile.. no pictures.. etc.

BUT.. if you message me with:.. HI HOW ARE YOU DOING?.... i reply.. FINE AND YOU?

He didnt ask me if i was interested.. lol
 Talipia11
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 110
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/14/2011 3:16:19 PM
Thanks for your input from the male point of view. I also reply to all emails out of courtesy.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 113
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 5:50:03 PM
some of the woman i emailed back then and they did NOT reply and are STILL here .... looking for mr. PERFECT ...


Who's usually well aware that they are rude....and food, and see through; and definitely not someone who matches with him, or who will benefit him for the longrun.



I meet my fiance on POF ... but she passed away a year ago.


That sucks; sorry to hear dude
 The_Standard_Model
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 114
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 6:19:51 PM

People seem to forget you cant force someone into liking you. If people want high standards let them. I know what I want and what I wont settle for dont get mad at them for it.

Exactly!!


I was POF in March 2006.... .

some of the woman i emailed back then and they did NOT reply and are STILL here .... looking for mr. PERFECT ...

They are TOO picky about who to reply to..

I am sorry but no. Just because they did not pick YOU does not make them TOO picky. Yet another example of why not to reply back. She did not pick you so she is too picky and looking for "Mr. Perfect".
Everyone has their reasons for being on POF. but just because you do not make the cut for someone does not make theirs any less valid than yours.
 cin____dy
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 115
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 6:23:52 PM
I did the same thing I thought only right to be polite. But if you turn them down I learned they will just be horrible and say mean things. I found if I just did not answer then no mean remarks.
So, I try to be polite but often will not answer because it seems it gives them the idea they can be mean if you say thank you but no.
 cin____dy
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 116
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 6:25:15 PM
Mr. Messages--I did try that, but immediately guys want to go out with you or give you their phone numbers and if you just try to be polite they "go off" on you. I can talk to most people but online it seems guys feel they can say things they wouldn't if they met you in person.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 117
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 6:49:38 PM

I am sorry but no. Just because they did not pick YOU does not make them TOO picky. Yet another example of why not to reply back. She did not pick you so she is too picky and looking for "Mr. Perfect".


Accept that many forget the "looking"part.

There is no diligence in the search.

(As I see it anyways)
 The_Standard_Model
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 118
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 7:08:06 PM

Accept that many forget the "looking"part.

There is no diligence in the search.

(As I see it anyways)

So they did not pick you so they have not done enough 'due dilligence? Nonsense!! it is reasonable for people to set whatever standards that they chose. They looked. Even if it is just at your picture or your message and decided that they were not interested for whatever reason. Just because they did not give you a chance to have any sort of conversation does not mean that they did not look enough or are being picky. For whatever reason YOU did not make thet cut. It's not a personal attack on you. they simply were not attracted to you, nor interested enough to look any further. They are not obligated to force themselves to check you out any further once they have decided that they are not into you.
It is convienent to claim that there is no dilligence in the search when you have zero idea of how much effort that they have put forward. The fact that they were not interested enough in you to respond (thus do not respond) ends up being twisted into them being shallow (looking for mister perfect), lazy (not putting any dilligence in the search), and too picky is why people do not respond. Farrrr too often people can not simply accept that you were simply not the other person's cup of tea and move on. They need to 'defend' their pride and ego by attacking the person they sent the message to, or making up stories about them and talking crap about them (like in this thread). Seeing how responding with a polite 'Thanks, but no thanks" will usually make NO difference (even though person after person after person has decided to ignore it when several people say that is their experience when they left a polite rejection) it is often better to simply not respond.
DESPITE WHAT PEOPLE WANT TO BELIEVE, NO RESPONSE IS A RESPONSE. a RESPONSE OF I AM NOT INTERESTED IN TALKING TO YOU.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 119
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 7:51:12 PM
So they did not pick you so they have not done enough 'due dilligence? Nonsense!!


Well; pics arnt logically able to transmit chemistry

-If interests match up....why not go see how it goes?

-If they are home every night on the weekend, and complainnig that they really would like to find someone to go out with....well..

-If they state they want to make musci amnd abe amusician, yet ask you to do all the legwork to get them there; when you have given them GOLDEN routes to doing so?


They looked


Wow; the efforts some will take to find their dreams



It's not a personal attack on you.


Oh I now; they're just lazy, and possibly stupid. (And defintely not tactful enough to repulse, placate, or content anyone)



nor interested enough to look any further.


Interested in their own happiness, and finding what they say they are looking for enough..... to do further due diligence and looking you mean?

They are not obligated to force themselves to check you out any further once they have decided that they are not into you.


Agree 1o0%

and too picky


But of course; most of us know they are not picky enough. Or else when they do pick; they choose the flyfruit? (We can give examples, and societys backing; but why get nasty)



P.s.
DESPITE WHAT PEOPLE WANT TO BELIEVE, NO RESPONSE IS A RESPONSE. a RESPONSE OF I AM NOT INTERESTED IN TALKING TO YOU.


Are YOU suuuuure?

 The_Standard_Model
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 120
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Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 8:09:49 PM

Are YOU suuuuure?

Yup. Them not responding is the absolute most clear cut way of saying that they do not want to talk to you.

As for the rest... again just showing again and again why people generally do not respond back. You (and many others are obviously incapable of not taking the rejectio, even a polite rejection personally and feel the need to lash out at the person that is not interested. You still resort to calling them lazy, possibly stupid, saying that they only looked at a picture so in YOUR opinion they did not look hard enough (like your opinion means anything as far as how another person should act and like looks do not matter. If they are not attracted then they are just not attracted.) and trying to rationalize why they should give you more of a chance after they have decided that they are not interested.
look you are correct. Pics can not transmit chemistry. but pics can tell you if you are NOT interested in the person.

But I do notice that not a single one of you will aknowledge or give a suggestion on when a person says something rude (like call a woman a $2 whore because she was not interested).
 Natgoat
Joined: 3/24/2011
Msg: 121
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 8:25:48 PM
A polite reply will gain more respect than calling someone a $2 w#0re...
~Extremely *Classy*~
But ~some~ aren't looking for respect......are they...??
 modivin
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 122
Replying To Messages When Not Romantically Interested
Posted: 11/15/2011 8:39:32 PM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

SOMFAIFYA!!!!!


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