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 Athletics89
Joined: 8/23/2011
Msg: 26
Watching your partner have sex with someone elsePage 2 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
While I have never watched any of my ex girlfriends have sex with another guy, Lisa (my ex-fiance'), watched me have sex with one of her best friends (Stacy). Lisa enjoyed it, so did I. But it was a one time thing.
 Pete2205
Joined: 3/18/2011
Msg: 27
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/7/2011 12:06:23 PM
Sounds like you need to have your testicles reattached to me.

Is that so Alex....Its probably and easier job than the doc taking yours from between your ears and reattaching them :)
 CheckPrime
Joined: 7/20/2011
Msg: 28
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/7/2011 12:49:28 PM
What does that even mean Pete? I'm not familar with your 60's smack talk.

This kind of stuff seems like it would be for men who are, or are feeling, or like the feeling of being emasculated.
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 29
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/7/2011 3:30:45 PM

How many of you like watching your partner having sex with someone else?

I would love to watch him have sex with someone else. I get to pick though. Hehehe..


Also if you were a woman would you agree to do this if your partner requested it inoder to turn them on?

If he wanted to watch me have sex with another woman.. he'd be sh*t out of luck.

I already know I turn him on.. no 3rd party necessary.
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 32
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 6:01:50 AM

There is actually a term for this behavior - Cuckold - look it up.

Cuckholding is a very specific form of this kind of behaviour. That involves humiliation to some degree, and a very clear communication between partners about expectations and desires.

I don't see that the OP was asking about this type of relationship at all.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 33
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 7:32:35 AM
Humiliation to some degree? Hmm...my personality wouldn't agree with that for sure!
 stonecastle
Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 34
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 9:52:48 AM

Humiliation to some degree? Hmm...my personality wouldn't agree with that for sure!
As for humiliation I like some humiliation from a woman like having a woman grabbing handfuls of trifle and squelching it into my face while she laughs as if she is enjoying do it to me.
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 35
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 10:20:06 AM
It would have to be strawberry trifle really

And I'd still want to eat it all to myself when she was finished coz its my favourite

it must have the hundreds and thousands sprinkled on it though or its just not the same
 CheckPrime
Joined: 7/20/2011
Msg: 36
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 10:24:33 AM

Careful there youngin'

Well either the guy is very submissive and knows he's not adequate OR he's VERY confident about his abilities! There's all flavors, so for you, whom has no experience with it in any direction to question a man's masculinity, just shows your own insecurities and projections...the OP hasn't mentioned his personal flavor yet so...


Some things you don't have to experience to know you'd feel like an uncomfortable **** doing it.

For instance, I've never had a penis in my ass but I'm pretty sure I wouldn't enjoy it.

You just mad cause your an inadequate little sissy boy, don't Blame ME.
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 37
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 12:02:23 PM
You really ought to leave his grammar out of it




She might be really old and only on here to make friends
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 38
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 12:18:12 PM
While I dont care who else does this, and I wouldnt stop talking to them if I found out they were into it, it would not be for me. I know myself well enough to know this would only be trouble. (for me)
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 39
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 1:10:48 PM

You just mad cause your an inadequate little sissy boy, don't Blame ME.

Tsk tsk.. name calling isn't allowed.




Some women would hate the idea of the guy being the cuckold type yet turned on by the hot-wife type alpha partner...and vice versa.
I was introduced to a blog earlier this year that followed a female dominant and her submissive cuckhold partner. It wasn't what I would consider a typical cuckhold in that there was a lot of hot sex between them, but occasionally she would bring another home and f*ck him while the boyfriend cleaned the house or did other errands. The boyfriend kept a blog too, and wrote a book about his experiences as a submissive man.

I've teased partners about tying them to a chair in the bedroom, blindfolding them and then having sex with another in the same room. Once done with the other man, I'd release my partner and we'd have crazy wild sex that included the other man. It hasn't happened... and I'm not too worried about it.

A lot of cucks are men who are told they are inadequte in some way, that they could no longer satisfy the woman, or feel they can't satisfy their woman. Whether or not this is true will depend on the couple involved. I could never make a cuck out of my man because I happen to like everything about him and am thoroughly satisfied with our sex life.

ETA


^^^ Have you any knowledge of the Hot-Wife thing though....it's quite different. Again even that goes both ways in that there are some where the woman is very submissive and the male partner "whores" her out and enjoys seeing her used. Then there's the more equal or somewhat dominant woman with a dominant male who just gets to have her boys on the side...the male is confident in HIS ability to "take her back"....and enjoys the competition.

I'm sure there are a million variables too...

Regardless, no interest, sexual or otherwise, should be pushed onto an unwilling partner.

Admittedly, not a whole lot. Then again.. I'm not exactly a submissive woman. *grins*

My partner is submissive with me, but knows fully I'd prefer him to another. He does not enjoy the competition as he experiences jealousy easily. I don't like inflicting that on him.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 40
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 1:22:49 PM
It would be trouble for me, as I have learned I bond with sex.

I am not the type that can seperate sex from love...and I accept this about myself and have no desire to try and change it. It is just who I am.
 Sensualx3
Joined: 4/10/2011
Msg: 41
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 4:04:07 PM
From the majority of the posts I see this only being mentioned with the either the female having two males or a guy with two females. What about the flip side of this is, what does it do for the female of the partnership to watch her man with another man?

I have had the pleasure of watching my partner with another man, as well as being the other man with another couple. All instances have been great experiences and some have carried on for some time. And now my relationship with my partner has never been stronger!
 kttnmarie
Joined: 10/30/2011
Msg: 42
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 6:50:53 PM
I'm with a man and we have three somes with other women frequently. That's because I'm bi and I enjoy watching him with her. It's very erotic tho it took me some time to understand how to deal with the jealousy factor. And separate the sex with other women vs. our relationship.

We always end up with a stronger bond with each other after we have sex with another woman. He truly does this for my pleasure. It's wonderful.
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 43
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/8/2011 7:20:33 PM

What about the flip side of this is, what does it do for the female of the partnership to watch her man with another man?

I didn't come out and say this, but it's what I alluded to when I said "I get to pick".
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 44
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/9/2011 5:33:23 AM
JCO - STD Police...hilarious...


ya, I've never done it, to each his own I guess - it all depends on both parties involved and the type of relationship you are in with someone else...

i'd think it'd better survive with a casual sexual relationship partner of sorts than a spousal relationship.



on my front,,,I never wanna see another guy's d1ck up close and personal in the same room raring to go...


so aside from whether or not I wanna let somebody bone my girl in front of me...
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 45
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/9/2011 7:22:38 AM

I can see how this works, if there is no emotional attachments from any direction, in the 3some. But if someone tells me he loves me, I would hope he doesn't want to farm me out and watch. It is my opinion that love cannot be part of this equation. But for fun and games? yes


Thats kind of a two dimensional view of it really though

The only time I've seriously considered it and would have gone along with it was with somebody I DID love, but rather than "farming them out" as you put it, the fantasy was theirs not mine

People do lots of things they dont even like, some theyre not fussed about and some they enjoy to some extent for someone they love all the time. Its only when it involves sex that the "ooh its wrong" type views seem to come out

But asking somebody to move from a house they are happy with, leave a job they love to get one that pays better and tons of other things and THATS considered perfectly "fine" which is kind of funny really

It can work just as well either with or without love as long as the two people involved are emotionally secure enough with the activity, but without that level of security both within themselves and mutually within the relationship it will cause problems even with an FB
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 46
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/9/2011 11:46:58 AM

I do wonder upon occasion how people can be so secure that it really doesn't bother them - and I'd love to be that secure in myself and my relationship but I don't think it's in my basic personality lol.


I dont think its just to do with how secure somebody feels with a partner really

No amount of feeling secure will alter the way someone with a moral problem or other issue with such things would view the activity. I think its more to do with the type of outlook and mindset a person has too

Peoples views on sex are about as varied as their sexual preferences. Some cant avoid instantly being besotted with anyone they ever sleep with irrespective of the circumstances. So it would hardly fit in with their outlook for one

Then you have people who have a fairly possessive type of outlook, probably not so good for them either

And people who cant, or dont want to think they can ever seperate love from sex would be best avoiding it too

And thats just three outlooks that wouldnt be compatible without giving it much thought

Other people though have various "types" of sex, not just the difference between sensual and animalistic. But also other degrees too, purely recreational being one, infact on this topic masturbation kind of overlaps quite a bit. As some people tend to look on sex they have with somebody other than their partner, or sex their partner has with somebody other than them almost as tho the other people are "toys" theyre both using in "their" sex life

Couples I've known with open marriages havent tended to view extramarital sex as being anything like the sex they have with their partner. And although to some people its all "sex", to them theyre radically different because feelings are only involved when its with their partner which as a concept would go over most peoples heads I reckon

And if someone doesnt have a compatible outlook then something like this would erode any security they DID have in their relationship. So I really dont think the security itself is the key issue at all
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 47
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Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/10/2011 12:57:04 PM
I think, and know, people that do this sort of thing, and from what I have seen, they are the ones that stay together, and love each other,
Me.... I would prefer that to finding out my partner is cheating......
 whytwater
Joined: 8/7/2008
Msg: 48
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/10/2011 1:11:30 PM
OP, I think the issues you raise by this question are much larger than you intended.
Where, exactly, does sex fit into the full panoply of mutual "love"?
If a couple is "in love", does each earn a proprietary interest in the other's body, i.e., own it, exclusively?
What all purposes does sexual behavior fulfill?
When we say "til death do us part", at least for the first time, at age 20-30, is it even possible to expect that each betrothing partner is making a rational, informed, commitment, ruling out all others forever, and no matter what?
Of course, there are more, e.g., Wanttotravel's choice between watching your partner fvck another, or having it happen without your knowledge, and, of course, all the health issues incidental to non-exclusivity.
I've never been able to handle more than one lover at a time, on any level, but I gotta say it's an intriguing concept.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 49
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/11/2011 6:31:33 AM
I can see how this works, if there is no emotional attachments from any direction, in the 3some.

That's pretty much how I'd see it.

But if someone tells me he loves me, I would hope he doesn't want to farm me out and watch. It is my opinion that love cannot be part of this equation.

I think that depends a lot on the individuals. I certainly am not open minded enough to include another guy in my relationship. On the other hand, including another girl would not change the way I feel about my fiancee, so I can at least understand how people could love each other and still include another person. I just wouldn't expect my fiancee to see that any differently that I would if the roles were reversed. I'm sure she would not want to watch me with another woman, so a third person of either sex is a non-starter. The only way that could happening would be if she was also interested in women, which doesn't seem to be the case.

But for fun and games? yes.

Some people are better able to seperate love from fun and games than you or I, so I think it's mostly a matter of mindset, which at this point in my life, I don't have a lot of incentive to change. Unfortunately, it's not one of those things you can try with a partner and then undo if you had a problem with it. Trying it with a partner involves a real risk to a relationship, just to see if I'd be ok with it, especially if I have a pretty good idea that the answer would be that I'm not ok with it.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 50
Watching your partner have sex with someone else
Posted: 11/11/2011 6:59:56 AM
I love how people have to use exaggerated language to paint/taint the vision of it to build a straw man...

Actually, I think it's the old double standard disguised more subtley: that it's ok for men to sleep around but not for women. Most of the women I've had conversations with about this subject (which is quite a few), are more liely to be ok with another woman than another guy. Even if they are relatively ``liberated'' sexually, when the idea of two guys arises, women tend to see it as about the guys. So if one of the guys is her partner, I can see how a woman would tend to see that as being ``farmed out.'' It's difficult to erase all of the social conditioning people are raised with, even if it doesn't seem logical. Why women are generally more comfortable with another woman than another guy, is somewhat of a mystery, though. For that matter, why I'd be ok watching my fiancee with another woman but not with another guy is somewhat of a mystery, but it is probably some residual conditioning from that double standard left over.
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