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 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 76
Walking Out during First MeetPage 4 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

When there were no cell phones people could not behave this way.

I doubt cell phones have anything to do with people walking out of a place after meeting someone. I'm sure it happened before they were on the market.
 Dr.Z2008
Joined: 1/18/2007
Msg: 77
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/25/2011 1:36:13 PM
Don't worry about it,remember that the trademark of a low status person is avoiding conflict.She probably didn't have a "back up plan"for you and there where no girls around the bar to help her out and give them the look(Most women always have a back up plan to get out off the a first date if is not working). Be indifferent to the outcome and enjoy the moment,have fun......Next time you go out on a first date just ask her when you are ready to order for her to the bartender if she want to have "drink" or she rather have the" money"?
 mdgs
Joined: 11/17/2011
Msg: 78
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/25/2011 1:45:17 PM
That was extremely rude. Sorry you experienced that.

But be glad to be rid of her. Not worth your time.
 bimmerdude
Joined: 3/8/2011
Msg: 79
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/26/2011 8:00:09 AM
Don't feel bad. I had one lady bail early on me during the date after she was constantly on her damn cell phone. To her credit, she paid her share of the bill before leaving early.
 Big_fun_wave
Joined: 2/28/2009
Msg: 80
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/26/2011 4:47:06 PM
I was making reference to the op's date using the cell phone during the date. And then she gets up and leaves. It was probably all a bull$hit ruse by her, and she used the cell phone as a reason to leave. What would people do in a situation like that when there were no cell phones? If the op's date had not had a cell phone, it would have been a little trickier to pull off what she did.
 TuffGuy666
Joined: 11/22/2011
Msg: 81
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/26/2011 4:52:03 PM
OP, she left because she didn't like you. She could have been nicer in the way she handled it, but in the end what difference does it make? Move on. And get a thick skin.
 rec_diver
Joined: 11/13/2011
Msg: 82
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 10:11:03 AM

BeachBum46038: OP, she left because she didn't like you. She could have been nicer in the way she handled it, but in the end what difference does it make? Move on. And get a thick skin.


The guy makes a good point.

Sometimes it's worth trying to figure out "what went wrong" if you might have done something that.. well next time, you don't want to repeat.

But if there are no answers, and all you are doing is venting about some rude, disinterested person that you met for only a few minutes, why bother?
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 83
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 10:39:56 AM
When you realized she bailed, you should've sent her a text (if she didn't block you yet) saying: "Hey. You didn't pay your half of the bill. Get back to the bar to pay your portion of the tab". lol.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 84
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 11:03:21 AM
You stepped in it big time pal! Not all women on here are like this, nor all men.(sigh) Now we will be treated to the litany of "he was" or "she did's", when while she was rude and wrong, it really makes no difference. The only person you can control is yourself, NOT the actions of others.

Learn from the lessons exhibited. First if a woman is texting or fiddling with her cell phone, say something or end the date right there and then. She is supposed to be there on a date with you, not her cell phone.

No matter what you think or feel, nothing about online dating(meeting really) is real until you see each other. Even then, you don't know who you met, until you've seen them for a while.
 egowitch
Joined: 6/5/2011
Msg: 85
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 2:53:24 PM
It's apparently how THAT woman operates.

It is NOT how ALL women (or men) operate !
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 86
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 5:48:26 PM
OP - you tried to meet a girl 2 times and you went in for a 3rd time to meet her ?

and you wonder why she was inattentive with you and walked out on you ?




maybe cuz she went to meet the guy who stood her up 3 times...


he's more interesting anyhow...



if a woman balks on meeting you - don't be a weakazz and continue to try to meet her.


she's not interested man...
 snowgoddess
Joined: 7/24/2011
Msg: 87
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 5:55:25 PM
flat out a B I T C H !!! so not worth your time. thaqt is rude and inconsiderate for anyone to do to another. cowards! let them run! please dont take it personally, a clear case of "its not you, its HER!"
a real person would sit out the hour, chat, enjoy being out, then perhaps decline a second date. Embarrasing to sit at the bar? perhaps, not having a piece of crap like that in your life? priceless!
 _mr_brown
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 88
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/29/2011 7:45:27 PM
Whoa dude what did you say to her at the bar?!?!?!? Lol j/k
 badbrains213
Joined: 5/6/2011
Msg: 89
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/30/2011 11:45:11 AM
i am a master of the irish goodbye.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 90
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/30/2011 12:35:28 PM

If she had another guy she was working, she still could have lied and said she needed to leave period.


Wow, yeah. SHE lacks class. How tacky.

It couldn’t possibly be that she wasn’t interested in you, or that you did something wrong, or your three year old pics are less than accurate. She bailed on you because she’s working other guys. Yep. That’s it.

Btw, you should acquaint yourself with “cropping”.

Maleman999:
What gets me are the people who have the "I am a prince/princess" complex who flip out if the person they're meeting doesn't turn out to be their perfect fantasy guy/girl they hoped for, and come on POF saying everyone is a liar and a player.

 kevination
Joined: 11/17/2011
Msg: 91
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/30/2011 12:39:43 PM
I would look at it like a blessing. What if you had spent months dating her and then had that happen?
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 92
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/30/2011 1:38:30 PM
^^Are you trying to say walking out of a place when you've been dating a while is a bad thing? It's not like they don't know where to find you.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 93
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 11/30/2011 5:52:54 PM
@snowgoddess: bikini picture...

Back on topic: Cell phones and dating...not a good mix. Technology, isn't it wonderful?

Don't let this bad experience discourage you. Plenty of nice ladies here!
 sddude
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 94
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/10/2012 11:03:48 AM
That is how some women operate, it is not unusual. kind of like not answering the phone or not writing back , means you gotta get the message indirectly.

Several women have left me like that some for another unkinwn guy they met on our date, usually I get a phonecall back asking for help,( left on the side of the road by a carzy, a player leaves her alone with the hotel bill or the ex bf is hurting her etc...)
sad stuff but not unusual.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 95
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/10/2012 11:53:28 AM

You sound like a princess bytch. Guys already have to jump through hoops and go through a fifty step process to actually meet a woman in person. Now you add in that a video interview is required as well. If you are this paranoid about dating, you would be the last person I ever want to meet. I don't do video interviews to have a coffee. Are you going to videotape the entire first meet and then analyze it afterwards? First meets are suppose to be fun-not a formal job interview type of process.

Here's a question for all regarding the misrepresenting picture:
Let's say you passed all of the initial tests and you were getting together for a first meet. You walk through the door and see the person, or you're there first and see the person you are to meet. If the person turned out to be a lot more beautiful and gorgeous than their photos, what you freak out and scream "You're a f__king liar. You misrepresented yourself in your pictures. I'm out of here" and storm out in a huff?

What gets me are the people who have the "I am a prince/princess" complex who flip out if the person they're meeting doesn't turn out to be their perfect fantasy guy/girl they hoped for, and come on POF saying everyone is a liar and a player.


If it makes me a biatch, I dont really care. I have way better things to do than meet liars and posers.

Webcams are free with most purchases of a pc these days, laptops have them built in...and since I adopted this strategy, I have not been tricked into meeting losers who post fake pics. Its all good!!

You are not the type of man Id ever want to meet, so you thinkng anything negative about how I operate means absolutely nothing to me.

If you think being 'real' and being willing to show you are real is jumping through hoops, then I would generalize you as lazy. You probably also think sending free emails on a free website is 'hard work'. LOLOL

Good luck!
 ConnCat
Joined: 10/28/2011
Msg: 96
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/10/2012 1:10:05 PM
Though I agree with people here that someone like that is not worth our time, I would have written a very terse, follow-up note. Some eloquent version of WTF? For my own personal closure.
 StillCuteAt53
Joined: 11/1/2011
Msg: 97
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/10/2012 8:29:55 PM
Well I met a guy at a coffee/book store for a greet meet. He wanted to leave and go to a sports bar. Not my cup of tea but okay,I thought. I drop off my car (car problems) and had him meet my sister and brother -in-law. The guy was very nervous and I started to back out. I allowed peer pressure from family and friends to go out and have fun. People, Pay attention to the red flags and that gut feeling!!! Shortly after we got to the sports bar he began to drink 5 shots of teq. and 3 hard liquor drinks within a few hours. I told him that I was hungry in hopes that he would eat too. He was very offended and asked, "Why I didn't eat beforehand". I thought it would sober him up. He reached over and licked my ear with what I can only describe as Dragon Breath. I went to the restroom and called my sister to meet me across the street, I needed rescueing. I waited about 10 min. and excused myself to go out and smoke a cigarette (non smoker) and left him in the sports bar. Well three hours later he text me to say how rude I was.It actually took him that long to realize that I was gone! Did he really think I'd get in a car with a drunk driver "Seriously"
 Miss_Faz
Joined: 2/2/2012
Msg: 98
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Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/13/2012 2:53:47 AM
such a great reply! and totally true
 magicallaroundme
Joined: 3/9/2011
Msg: 99
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/13/2012 5:46:21 AM
I've done it several times. I'd say, "This isn't going to fly. Let's salvage the rest of the evening on our own." and then just go. Neat and to the point.
 femaleconnection
Joined: 8/12/2010
Msg: 100
Walking Out during First Meet
Posted: 2/13/2012 7:10:04 AM

This is all good and well in theory, but there are many women out there who will freak out at the mere mention of chatting on a webcam (after bad experiences with guys 'exposing themselves', or asking the woman to).



Dont I know it.

I dont ask right off...I wait til Im feeling curious enough to want to meet. Then I just tell him Im all for a webcam session, fully clothed to 'see' one another. I dont ask them to stand up and twirl for me...Im not doing it to vette that they have a good body. I tell them, Im doing it to ensure the man on camera matches the face from pics he himself already sent to me.

I am as open as I want the men I chat with to be and I dont ask for anything I myself cannot supply. I offer them to see me as well, to ensure THEY are also not wasting time meeting a fake. It goes both ways. I have chatted with too many men that have had the old bait n switch happen to them, this way ensures that both of us will recognize one another at that first meeting, which is my main goal. I cannot vette anything a stranger tells me, that takes time, but I can vette that thier face matches the pics they sent. It is a good start in the trust building process.

There are ways of asking for a webcam session that are not creepy, and as soon as I think the man in question is going in a direction I am not comfy with it is 1 click of the 'stop' button and it is over.
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