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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?      Home login  
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 readytogetbackoutthere
Joined: 8/25/2012
Msg: 290
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?Page 13 of 14    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14)
I don't really have the answer here, I'm the worst at giving advice. But my ex used to make fun of me and call me fat when I was never over a size 10. After he left I lost down to a 6. What's the new girlfriend look like? She would make 2 of me. I was so proud of him! I thought he was finally growing up... until he tried to make a fat joke on myspace and all her girlfriends were ready to kill him.
Seriously, if you read most of the men's profile on here and could weed out the ones that say "looking for that special someone" from the ones that mean ".....perfect someone", it would be helpful. Pictures are 2 dimensional, like buying clothes online, just not the same as buying them in the store.
 SingleInVancouver
Joined: 9/29/2012
Msg: 291
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/3/2012 3:14:15 PM
I had one man comment that I have to many restrictions regarding lifestyle in my profile. Mostly in regards to what he perceives as my dietary intake. I like the above poster states put NO processed foods in my body, because I know what it does to your organs. YES that includes brain function which controls everything in the body.

Weight is irrelevant to appearance as weight consists of bone, muscle and fat. Most people who lose " weight " generally lose water, followed by muscle and bone. The first thing people do to lose weight is ditch carbohydrates which carry 2 hydrogen molecules per 1 of carbohydrate, hence the water loss in the body. If you have ever seen a " skinny fat " person you would realized weight loss itself is not the goal to be aiming for. Fat loss and body function regulation is what is most important for health.

Having high body fat is a symptom of improper lifestyle choices and shows a lack of control in your personality, whether you care to admit it or not. If your fat, smoke, drink excessively or any other addictive behavior your out of control. So the question is do you want to be with someone who can't control their eating and sedentary lifestyle habits or other addictive behaviors ? I know I don't want to be, because eventually it would become a huge bone of contention when faced with the education to live better they CHOOSE to live out of control. Society has slipped ridiculously into complacency on this issue, because of " rights " of people to eat whatever they wish. In the same breath the government bemoans the state of the health care system, while they issue permits for fast food chains.

So in conclusion 20 lbs is important but not in numbers on the scale, but it IS important in body fat %. No one needs to lose bone and muscle.
 justdeb1111
Joined: 8/12/2012
Msg: 292
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/3/2012 6:27:15 PM
Muscle weighs more than fat. You can look at one person who is physically active either in their job or the gym, and another who is a couch potato. Height and weight being the same, the couch potato is going to look "heavier".

It's not about the actual weight, obviously, it's about how it is carried and where.
 OutofControlMan
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 293
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/3/2012 6:58:20 PM

Society has slipped ridiculously into complacency on this issue, because of " rights " of people to eat whatever they wish. In the same breath the government bemoans the state of the health care system, while they issue permits for fast food chains.


or, "allowing" people to do other things terrible for their health such as regularly wearing 4" heels as you state you do, when done regularly causes stress on joints in the ankles, knees, hips, & back. Leading oncologists believe that wearing high heels regularly causes inflammation that will lead to cancer in the longer run..see getting all holier than thou can back fire..but wearing heels is about looks so that's OK and good, right?

bring on the ban on high heels; Big Brother knows best!
 colomtman
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 294
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/3/2012 7:40:46 PM
well as someone said on here ...beauty is all in the eye of the beholder... however..over 33% of our population is obese.. with a high BMI and our kids are showing the signs of disease that an old man would have because they have been obese for their formative years...
by the time your in your 20,30.40s and up if you have been obese all your life..then you already are an old sick person.. its bad for your heart..joints..health ...so 20# may not be unattractive to someone..but it is a death sentence to the one that is packing it... if that extra weight is fat and not muscle...
 SingleInVancouver
Joined: 9/29/2012
Msg: 295
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 6:16:20 AM

or, "allowing" people to do other things terrible for their health such as regularly wearing 4" heels as you state you do, when done regularly causes stress on joints in the ankles, knees, hips, & back. Leading oncologists believe that wearing high heels regularly causes inflammation that will lead to cancer in the longer run..see getting all holier than thou can back fire..but wearing heels is about looks so that's OK and good, right?



Perhaps I should list the amount of time I wear my heels ? I wear them to shop and perhaps a date, so essentially not very long. The also reduce the blood flow to the gastrocnemius in addition to what you listed. I don't consider what I typed holier than thou, it is factual and intended to help people understand how the body works. Though I see your the type to comment on whatever you please. So obviously it doesn't bother you that society is in a downward spiral to obesity and death.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 296
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 7:01:19 AM
For those that don't think 20 pounds is much, I would suggest that you carry two and a half gallons of water (or nine liters) around for awhile.

Or while those of you in the US are shopping for your Thanksgiving turkey, hoist a 20 pounder and imagine distributing it around your midsection.
 SingleInVancouver
Joined: 9/29/2012
Msg: 297
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 7:13:45 AM
I noted in your profile outofcontrol you have " crossfit " listed AND you work in the health industry ? The exercises in crossfit are fine, the fact they time you to do as many repetitions as possible is NOT. That new trend while an efficient fat burning tool causes injuries to most people. The risk is not worth the reward. Though it certainly provides personal trainers with work, fixing all the damage caused by crossfit.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 298
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 8:49:05 AM
To get the idea of the diffrence of 20lb ... go to the store pick up four 5lb bags of rice. Carry it around while you are doing the rest of the shopping. Before you are ready to go and pay. Go and put the rice back, That relief you feel when you put the rice back. That would be the diffrence that 20lb make feels like, Except we carry it 24/7.
 untilever
Joined: 10/6/2012
Msg: 299
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 9:04:02 AM
20 pounds is a lot. I think 10 pounds is actually pretty noticeable too, in most cases.
 OutofControlMan
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 300
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 9:20:40 AM

To get the idea of the diffrence of 20lb ... go to the store pick up four 5lb bags of rice. Carry it around while you are doing the rest of the shopping. Before you are ready to go and pay. Go and put the rice back, That relief you feel when you put the rice back. That would be the diffrence that 20lb make feels like, Except we carry it 24/7


REALLY makes one wonder how those NFL Linebackers who weigh 320 lbs. are able to sprint so fast and move fast..or NBA players, many of whom exceed 250 lbs.., many are north of 270..

maybe we should only hire male firefighters, construction workers or cops who weigh under 150 so they can move faster, with more endurance??
 HaydenFan
Joined: 10/19/2011
Msg: 301
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 9:47:07 AM


REALLY makes one wonder how those NFL Linebackers who weigh 320 lbs. are able to sprint so fast and move fast..or NBA players, many of whom exceed 250 lbs.., many are north of 270..

maybe we should only hire male firefighters, construction workers or cops who weigh under 150 so they can move faster, with more endurance??
I trained with one of those 280 lb freaks just to 'try' and keep up lol. Outstanding when those giants are so agile isn't it?

Op I'd have to say that yes 20 lbs does indeed make a difference. I'm now far more active and fit after getting back to the gym. For me it's less about vainity and more about respecting one's physical health. I will add that I'm exponentially more attracted to women that are athletic and confident as well. It really does show through in their personality and it never takes more than four sentences to tell if it's for health or just vainity.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 302
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 10:03:17 AM
REALLY makes one wonder how those NFL Linebackers who weigh 320 lbs. are able to sprint so fast and move fast..or NBA players, many of whom exceed 250 lbs.., many are north of 270..


Most professional athletes have high BMI numbers because they carry a lot more muscle tissue than the average person.

As for the NFL, I suspect you're talking about linemen and not linebackers (I doubt there are any linebackers in the league that exceed 300 lbs). Some linemen do carry quite a bit of adipose tissue around their midsection, but they are also extremely strong. As a result, they are able to move quickly in short bursts, which is ideal for their specialty. Not many are able to run very fast for any distance.

NBA players that weigh 250+ also tend to be well over 6'6" tall. The league average is about 6'7" and 225 lbs.

For the average citizen with a sedentary lifestyle, an extra 20 lbs of fat is significant.
 Debisusanne
Joined: 5/3/2011
Msg: 303
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 11:14:08 AM
I've recently lost (only) 12 lbs.. and am now getting hit on by the ANTI fat chick guys..

fat chance they have a chance.. :))

I didnt lose it to attract them.. i just want a green BMI and cool clothes to wear..
 chelseajkt1
Joined: 8/19/2010
Msg: 304
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 1:34:04 PM
Don't forget about bunion surgery with the heels.
 reekt
Joined: 9/5/2012
Msg: 305
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 1:44:41 PM
these posts are funny.

20 lbs is a big difference to EVERYONE.
 chelseajkt1
Joined: 8/19/2010
Msg: 306
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 1:46:14 PM
I know of a woman who swims who had to gain weight to accomplish her swims. She has done 3 out of the 7 world ocean swims. For the Ireland swim she had to gain weight. I would love to be as strong as she is. I'm also a swimmer not nearly as good as she but probably do it 2-3 times a week. I'm healthy and work out in different ways. One summer I did nothing more than walk and my legs doubled in size in 3 months. I also used to do ankle weights. My weight is mainly muscle and I have a large bone structure. I'm toned and that's good eneough for me. If I'm 20 lbs over good luck in trying to lose it. I've seen the pain women have gone thru for bunion surgery for no reason other than wearing heels.
 CDMer
Joined: 9/15/2012
Msg: 307
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/4/2012 1:53:57 PM
20 pounds of fat makes a huge difference in one's appearance and in one's energy level, life expectancy, blood pressure, joint wear and tear and in general, one's state of both physical and mental health.
 chelseajkt1
Joined: 8/19/2010
Msg: 308
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 3:28:10 PM
My joint wear and tear is from 2 car accidents no fault of my own. This last accident probably about 100,000.00 was put into me due to the accident as I call it Humpty Dumpty has been put back together. It's not always due to weight. My blood pressure is fine. I probably do more exercise than most people. I work out on a total gym, have cords, bands, medicine ball, weights and I swim in addition to an elliptical. I don't know of very many people who have experienced what I have and still have an upbeat attitude. I had an accident where the driver came down the wrong side of the road hit the car in front of me, broadsided my car I got hit worse in all he totalled a small car, my SUV and his truck. How would you like to be his insurance company?
 usernonymous
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 309
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How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 5:45:00 PM
It's not about the number of pounds, its about % of weight lost. A person who goes from 200 to 180 would be more noticeable than a person going from 400 to 380.
 Drawesome32
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 310
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 7:16:29 PM
20 pounds can be a HUGE difference. i lost some weight over the last couple years and i dropped about 20 pounds. i had a ton of people coming up to me telling me how much better i look now. and im not really a small guy either, at 5'10 200 lbs. if people can easily see 20 pounds on me, imagine 20 pounds on a woman, who will most likely have less muscle tone and be shorter. the difference is drastic in many cases. anyone on here who has lost 20 pounds since taking their pics should remove all the older pics and replace them with new, thinner pics. itll probably help.
 Confuzzled4ever
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 311
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 8:04:42 PM
It's both really..

20 pounds is a huge difference unless you are an extremely obese person.

but losing the weight will also make you feel better and will boost your confidence..

So you look better.. and you feel better.

both make you more attractive to the opposite sex.

I didn't lose any weight.. I'm just super happy and smiling all the time. LOL

I get hit on constantly now it's ridiculous.

So it can also be either one or the other, rather then both..

Although.. if you're not happy or confident in yourself.. you might not see an increase in attention even if you lose the weight.. In my opinion anyway..
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 312
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 8:52:47 PM

I'm resurrecting this thread cuz I have a female friend...she used to be heavier & lost some weight...she found that the females she made friends w/ when she was heavier are not so friendly now that she is not their eating buddy/fat friend. I think a couple are even jealous, they stayed heavy, one even gained...
HAS any had that happen? needed new friends AFTER a weightloss, cuz the old ones were unsupportive/saboteurs???

Sadly, I soooooo know what she’s going through (and what you’re asking.) For me, it was 20 years ago and I still remember the nastiness/cattiness/meanness/ridiculousness very clearly. At the time, I was mystified. Not so much so now. Unfortunately? There are still times when things from other women will crop up and prove to me that I have very few true female friends. I don’t care to figure out the “why”s involved anymore. I no longer let other people’s problems become mine. I’d suggest your friend cut her losses and make friends who only those who celebrate her accomplishments.

~OT~ 20 pounds, in my world is a HUGE difference. I’d be adding a 1/5 of me to me. NO WAY! My SO and I both recently added weight (5 pounds for me, 10 for him) on purpose. He added lean mass and I added fat pounds. We were both in need of a little and so we consciously did so. But when the weight gain was achieved, we both went back to maintenance in order to stay exactly as we wanted to be. I’m certain some won’t like our attitudes on weight gain, but we both agree ~ if either one of us gains weight to the point of looking chubby or fat? It’ll be problematic to the relationship. 20 years ago when we met, we were both over-weight and over time, we both adopted lifestyles conducive to healthy living. Many people will overlook the love-handles, the tummy-pouches and even the saddle-bags/double chins, etc. I think it’s more than great so many think differently than I (we) do. Fortunately in life, we only live our own lives because I’d not be willing to overlook 20 pounds in my SO, even if he were adding straight-up muscle. I don’t like the muscle-head look (or mentality) and I wouldn’t do well with someone who doesn’t mind if I gain fat because I don’t have the wherewithal to keep it at bay. This is definitely one of those topics that I firmly believe is a “like-minds” do best. JMO
 hplazerjet
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 313
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/5/2012 10:55:03 PM
Weight makes such a huge difference in the way people look. Weight makes you look so much older.
I know, you don't wanna hear that.
It takes big discipline to eat right and exercise all the time, but it pays off in looking good and better health.
 OutofControlMan
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 314
How much of a difference does 20 pounds REALLY make?
Posted: 11/6/2012 7:24:38 AM

Weight makes such a huge difference in the way people look. Weight makes you look so much older.
I know, you don't wanna hear that.


true, within a certain range, around 'normal, fit' boy type/weight.


anorexia also does make one look a lot older too, I know obesity is a more common problem, but the bone-rack anorectic cougars who think they look "hot" at 45 because they are skinny (5;6", 100 lbs.,or less. ) are also sadly mistaken ..
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