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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Going well then hit the wall      Home login  
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 Capn_America
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 43
Going well then hit the wallPage 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
LOL I think she got what she wanted. Come on, its not that much of a shocker. Woman sees cool guy on the internet, woman sleeps a few times with cool guy, woman flushes cool guy. Sure, you met the family, the kids, the dog, but maybe for her, like for them, it wasn`t a big deal. Hell, maybe she does the exact same thing every 6 months. Maybe you were a reboud relation from a previous union. Maybe underneath her costume she`s pink and fluffy.
It`s just so hard to tell about these things, people just throw opinions around, but basically, unless you ask her, you will never know. Call her up and play the idiot, and get HER to talk; "What happenned?" "Why are we done?""Is it my fault?". Usually when talking to someone, the less accusation or threatenning in a convo will net you the best results, so playing the idiot and asking questions will net you much better results than calling her up and demanding explanations.

I`m just real sorry for you man, it sucks when it happens, especially when you want something meanningfull so bad. The world is full of people who seem intejnt on scr*wing you (no pun intended) for no reason than for it itself. I really do wish you better luck next time... (manly hug here)
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 44
Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/7/2011 3:45:21 PM
It's her loss. This is one of the reasons why I turn hard hearted towards dating. You give people attention only to have it thrown back in your face. Onto the next one OP.
 chrylann
Joined: 12/8/2007
Msg: 45
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Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/7/2011 5:16:13 PM
I think you scared her off. Three dates and you are inviting yourself to family holiday gatherings. You went too fast.
 pureaussie257
Joined: 11/26/2011
Msg: 46
Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/8/2011 7:17:42 AM
I don't know about other women, but sending flowers after you first slept together would freak me out. It also seems as if you have moved way too fast.
Not knowing what your text's and phone conversations were about make it hard to determine where you both stand. From what I can see you were ready for a full on relationship and she was just sussing you out.
Make's me laugh when I see a lot of posters on here shudding about sex after 'just' a few weeks! It's 2011 not 1811
 cutenperky2
Joined: 8/2/2011
Msg: 47
Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/8/2011 4:12:24 PM
Seems simple to me you slept together to fast. YOu didnt wait for the love to grow . Maybe she felt bad from it or cheap I dont know. You also sent flowers after sleeping with her.. that is way to much. You pushed her away with that. I think you came on way to strong. Its a shame becasue you said you had something with her before you slept with her ( to soon in my oppinion) sent flowers ( to soon in my oppinion). You got to not go from 0-60 and take this way way slower.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 48
Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/8/2011 7:31:22 PM
OP, sorry that this happened-but I think it just wasn't meant to be.
This happens a lot,especially in these days where people have so much more mobility and opportunity to "shop"-there has to be a super strong sense of resonance between 2 people, and these days people can emotionally and socially hold out for that "feels so right" connection,rather than worrying about limited selection and "shelf life".

I'm not going to get into telling you about how to play games, I'm not going to describe timelines, and I'm not going to tell you to do anything different than to be yourself. If you go into "women like ***holes so I'll be one" the next woman you meet may be TOTALLY turned off by that. Or she may sense you are trying to play a certain game or role,and decide she doesn't need a relationship with a guy who is still trying on personalities to see which one "works".

I do tend to think that the turkey day drop-in visit might have been a bit on the pushy/presumptous side-but over all, I just think it was one of those things that made a quick start but ran out of gas quickly. Be glad she didn't keep you around as a timefiller while she looked for the bigger better deal. At least she was honest.
Or maybe she did meet someone that she felt a stronger attraction to,and chose to NOT try and juggle dating a couple of different guys just to inflate her own ego.
Cindy O
 A_Gent
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 49
Going well then hit the wall
Posted: 12/8/2011 8:02:20 PM
OP... you may never has a reason that will satisfy you, but the answer is still the same... despite how you felt about her, she just wasn't that into you and did not want to invest any further in the relationship. That does not necessarily mean there was anything "wrong" with you... you just weren't the right fit.

Or you can continue to drive around in circles trying to make sense of it.

Keep moving forward.
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