Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >      Home login  
Joined: 11/27/2011
Msg: 28
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
yeah....Ive had a few, and I have been the psycho! LOL. Its a chemical imbalance called LOVE!!!! DAMNIT!!!
Joined: 2/9/2011
Msg: 29
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 12/12/2011 11:27:30 AM
After reading a few of these stories my ex doesn't sound so bad. At least she abides by the restraining order.
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 30
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 12/12/2011 11:42:53 AM
Bueller ?

Bueller ?

Bueller ?
Joined: 10/28/2011
Msg: 31
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 12/12/2011 12:12:13 PM
two things; are your folks rich? sounds like she may have not have been wanting a child, just the child support. also you may have been a bit harsh with the words "no way in hell." maybe try something a bit more subtle like "I'm not ready yet, maybe someday".
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 32
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 12/12/2011 1:01:26 PM
Op.. I get the feeling you have a warped sence of pride telling your little story. Is a part of you bragging over this or what? Do you think you are hot cause this lady has lost control over you? Cause it's not hot.
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 33
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 12/12/2011 2:43:52 PM
"The most important self-defense against psychopathic seducers consists of recognizing the initial warning signals so that you can escape the relationship early on, hopefully before you’re seriously harmed. Dr. Joseph Carver has put together a helpful and instructive list outlining the early symptoms of a dangerous relationship with a psychopath, or as he puts it quite aptly, with “a Loser.” As we’ve already seen in the previous account of Drew Peterson’s behavior, not all the signs of psychopathic seduction are obviously negative. But, as we’ll see, even the symptoms that seem positive (such as the instant attachment and over-the-top attention, flattery and gifts) are in fact negative. Similarly, Carver notes that the Loser doesn’t have to exhibit all of the symptoms listed below to be dangerous. The presence of even three of these symptoms indicates a potentially harmful relationship. Anything above this number points to not just probable, but certain harm. What do these warning signs indicate? They show that psychopathic seducers can fake decency and love convincingly in the beginning of a relationship. That’s how they manage to attract so many potential partners. But they can’t sustain their mask of sanity over time in intimate contact, since it’s fake and instrumental. If you remain vigilant, you’ll be able to see red flags early on in the relationship with a psychopath despite his veneer of charm and extravagant romantic words and gestures."
Unfortunately, when I was with my "psycho"; although I knew something wasn't quite "right", I never knew, the Whole Story until we actually lived together for 6 months... I must add, that losers[both, men & women] never show, their hand, early on in a new relationship nor do all these characteristics manifest at the same time. Sometimes, it's so subtle & you can't quite consciously see it. I'm enclosing this list so that, maybe someone can be spared what I went through:}
1.The Loser will Hurt you on Purpose.
2. Quick Attachment and Expression. “The Loser,” Carver notes, “has very shallow emotions and connections with others. One of the things that might attract you to the Loser is how quickly he or she says ‘I Love You’ or wants to marry or commit to you.
3. Frightening Temper. Sooner or later the Loser reveals his hot temper.
4. Killing Your Self-Confidence. Losers generally prefer flings and short-term affairs, which provide constant new thrills. They also engage in long-term relationships, however, to gain more lasting control over certain more promising targets
5.Cutting Off Your Support. In the wild, predators isolate their prey from the rest of the herd to better attack and devour it. That’s precisely what psychopaths do to their targets.
6.The Mean and Sweet Cycle. As we recall, Drew Peterson bought his wife a motorcycle and expensive jewelry even during the period of time when he was criticizing her, throwing her up against the wall, isolating her from her loved ones, accusing her of infidelity and calling her pejorative names.
7.It’s Always Your Fault. As we’ve seen, psychopaths never accept blame for anything they do wrong.
8.Breakup Panic. Psychopaths need to maintain control of everything in their lives, especially their romantic relationships. When they get bored with one partner or find a replacement, they can leave her on the spur of the moment, heartlessly, often without even bothering to offer an explanation.
9.No Outside Interests. To further control their victims, psychopaths don’t just isolate them from other people.
10. Paranoid Control. Notoriously, psychopaths stalk their principal targets. They suspect other people, including their partners, of being as manipulative, deceptive and unscrupulous as themselves.
11. Public Embarrassment. Psychopaths tend to put down their partners not only in private, but also publicly, to embarrass and isolate them. They want to build a psychological, if not physical, prison around their primary targets.
12. It’s Never Enough. Psychopaths don’t want to have successful relationships. They want to assert dominance by destroying, at the very least psychologically and emotionally, their partners.
13.Entitlement. As we’ve seen, psychopaths feel entitled to do and have everything and everyone they want. Laws, ethics and other people’s feelings don’t matter to them.
14. Your Friends and Family Dislike Him. Psychopaths tend to be pleasant and charming, at least superficially, at the beginning of a relationship. But once they have their partner firmly in their clutches, they proceed to isolate her from her support system.
15. Bad Stories. They say that the best indicator of future behavior is past behavior. There may be exceptions to this general principle.
16. The Waitress Test. Just as how people behaved in the past tells a lot about how they’ll behave in the future, so how they treat others functions as a pretty good indicator of how you’ll eventually be treated. A person who’s uncaring and unethical towards others will most likely also be that way to you when you no longer serve his interests.
17. The Reputation. Psychopaths tend to have polarized reputations. Their victims often describe them, in retrospect, as Janus figures (since they’re two-faced) or as Jekyll and Hyde personalities (since they switch from nice to mean)
18. Walking on Eggshells. During the course of their marriages to Drew Peterson, at least two of his wives reported losing their self-confidence as a result of his emotional and physical abuse.
19.Discounted Feelings/Opinions. For psychopaths, their fundamental callousness and capacity for evil stems from their absolute selfishness and inability to respect other individuals, as fellow human beings with independent needs and desires.
20.They Make You Crazy. According to her friends, Kathy Savio felt overcome by rage, jealousy and anger when Drew cheated on her with Stacy. While her emotional response was perfectly understandable under the circumstances, Drew depicted Kathy to others as “insane” to justify his mistreatment of her.
Joined: 11/23/2011
Msg: 34
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 12/14/2011 11:21:33 AM
I was married to a psycho that drove me nuts once, but luckily we both found the perfect therapy before we ended up in one of those cute little white jackets sitting in one of those padded rooms. Yes, it was called divorce. Now I am happy to report we have both experienced a new-found sanity and get along quite well with one another. We actually look back and laugh at the crazy way we were. Sometimes people just don't belong together and being together makes them both a little psycho at times, but it doesn't mean either of them are bad people. Sometimes they are just the wrong people for eachother. Oh, but don't get me wrong, I like my men a little on the crazy side, but this doesn't mean I want to date Jeffrey Domer either. Down Cannibals!
Joined: 11/1/2011
Msg: 35
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 12/15/2011 9:34:22 PM

My foster daughter is constantly suffering emotional blackmail from her family, ALL of them, She tries it out on others now and then, we get through it. She is in love with this boy who fits your profile perfectly, PERFECTLY. She broke up with him yesterday. I am going to read it to her and try to get her into counseling as it looks like I have may have finally secured custody of her. Crossingmy fingers. This boy and her family chew her up and spit her out.
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 36
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 12/16/2011 11:22:50 PM
My heart goes out to your daughter, it can happen to anyone...In these instances, the old cliche holds true when meeting-up with these characters [losers], "If it seems too good to be true; than, it usually is."
Here's the result of The Conclusion of A Relationship or, The Devaluation Phase, with a Psychopath or Narcissist :
"The process of the psychopathic bond is programmatic. It’s astonishingly elegant and simple given the complexity of human behavior. Idealize, devalue and discard. Each step makes sense once you grasp the psychological profile of a psychopath, of an (in)human being who lives for the pleasure of controlling and harming others. 1) Idealize: not you, but whatever he wanted from you and only for however long he wanted it. 2) Devalue: once he has you in his clutches, the boredom sets in and he loses interest. 3) Discard: after he’s gotten everything he wanted from you and has probably secured other targets.
He’s had enough. He’s gotten everything he wanted out of you. Bent you out of shape. Taken away, demand by demand, concession by concession, your dignity and happiness. As it turns out, the reward you get for all your devotion and efforts is being nearly destroyed by him. Ignoring your own needs and fulfilling only his–or fulfilling yours to gain his approval–has transformed you into a mere shadow of the lively, confident human being you once were.
He uses your weaknesses against you. He also turns your qualities into faults. If you are faithful, he sees your fidelity as a weakness, a sign you weren’t desirable enough to cheat. Nobody else really wanted you. If you are virtuous, he exploits your honesty while he lies and cheats on you. If you are passionate, he uses your sensuality to seduce you, to entrap you through your own desires, emotions, hopes and dreams. If you are reserved and modest, he describes you as asocial and cold-blooded. If you are confident and outgoing, he views you as flirtatious and untrustworthy. If you are hard working, unless he depends on your money, he depicts you as a workhorse exploited by your boss. If you are artistic and cultured, he undermines your merit. He makes you feel like everything you create is worthless and cannot possibly interest others. You’re lucky that it ever interested him. After the idealization phase is over, there’s no way to please a psychopath. Heads you lose, tails he wins. But remember that his criticisms are even less true than his initial exaggerated flattery. When all is said and done, the only truth that remains is that the whole relationship was a fraud."

To Your Daughter, tell her this,
For her, this process is excruciatingly personal. It may have cost her, her time, her heart, her friends, her family, her self-esteem or her finances. She may have put everything she had and given everything she could to that relationship. It may have become her entire life's focus. For the psychopath, however, the whole process isn’t really personal. He could have done the same thing to just about anyone who allowed him into her intimate life. He will do it again and again to everyone he seduces. It’s not about her. It’s not about the other woman or women who were set against her to compete for him, to validate his ego, to give him pleasure, to meet his fickle needs. He wasn’t with them because they’re superior to her. He was with them for the same reason that he was with her. To use them, perhaps for different purposes than he used her, but with the same devastating effect. He will invariably treat others in a similar way to how he treated her. Idealize, devalue and discard. Rinse and repeat. This process was, is and will always be only about the psychopath for as long as she stays with him.
This is why, your daughter must sever all bonds from this individual or the[her] pain will keep escalating ...*shakes head*
The silver lining to this dark cloud?
Maybe this will provide a good opportunity for her to learn more about who she is & what a Great, Beautiful & Wise Person She is; as She'll never be fooled again into dealing with a Loser...
"Beautiful light is born of darkness,
so the faith that springs from conflict
is often the strongest and the best."
~R. Turnbull
Blessings & Beauty to both you & Your Daughter:}
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 37
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 12/17/2011 5:01:39 AM
Nope never had one yet thank goodness :-). Incompatible Ex's? yes but not crazy. Loving the single life right now. :-)
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 38
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 3/29/2012 8:27:43 AM
I had one.
She should pray to all the Gods she knows and give thanks to still be breathing....
But yeah, she was profound. Even my sister didn't believe me, felt sorry for her when we broke up and went to help her. After 1 day, she realised how bad a manipulator she was.
Some people in life should be put down. Should be a law somewhere...
Joined: 2/29/2012
Msg: 39
it's PSYCHO-use spell check please
Posted: 3/29/2012 11:49:26 AM
Nope, no crazy ex boyfriends for me. yay.
but i may get one or two in the future who knows lol.
I'll just change my number and delete my facebook, move on.
got the cops on speed dial anyway. so bring it.
Joined: 6/2/2012
Msg: 40
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 11:53:23 AM
When I hear a man say that his ex was Psycho, I instantly look elsewhere...I believe the man did something to make her that way...
Joined: 12/21/2010
Msg: 41
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 12:14:13 PM
ROFL omg....that is insane!! seriously wat drives women to be so dumb and do all this nonsense is beyond me!

Thank god none of my ex's were that extreme...well of my ex, he was emotionally blackmailing me cuz he had a kid and he was separated from his wife at that time and I had no idea that he was even married and i found out later..of course I tried to break it off but he would guilt me into staying with him and he would say shiet like, his mom doesn't give him food for the baby and blah blah blah and he always used his kid as an excuse and i have a soft spot for kids...Little did I know that the money i was giving him was going into his crack habit! And one day his mom and bro were in a car nearby and spotted me and told me to stop giving him money and shiet but never told me wat the reason behind was. I wanted to get rid of this dead beat and no one was helping me so i had to put up with him for 3 years on and off and eventually the day came where i got rid of him finally with the help of his wife! Needless to say he's back with his wife whom he beats up and has put her in the hospital many times, and he came close to beating me but by Gods' grace he didn't get far with me! My ex when we were together, he would show up in the middle of the nite. park his car behind the building i lived in(i lived on the first floor) and he would honk his horn for me to wake up and give him money so he can buy drugs! And i would give it to him just so he would leave. He knew my home number and would call in the middle of the nite and one time my dad picked up the phone and he told my dad to give the phone to me...since that day i put call forwarding feature on my home phone, after 10pm, i would forward my home number to my cellphone and turn my cellphone off! But then he would show up at my house or the next day at work and cause problems! jeeez y are ppl such idiots i have no idea! I have finally sworn off from dating BROWN MEN! lol...they are seriously mental cases! white chocolate here i come! LOL
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 42
view profile
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 3:37:07 PM
I hope you've also told your mutual friends to not accept messages meant to be passed on to you. That'a strictly high-school.
Joined: 7/22/2011
Msg: 43
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 3:51:59 PM
Zero tolerance for psycho anything!
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 44
view profile
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 6:10:41 PM
Here in POF I've met only 3 people in the regular way. One is clearly stable, unperturbed and without serious issues. That's not working out. Those who aren't quite so sure of their position outside managed care seem to have more promise.
Joined: 4/22/2012
Msg: 45
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:55:01 PM
I have had two. One followed me cyberly from 08 until last Dec. but i know its not over... she will pop up again. i just ignore it. The other was on and off crazy, and we kept trying to work things out but each time it didnt she just got more scary.

makes me better at spotting red flags...
Joined: 1/6/2011
Msg: 46
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/23/2012 8:02:21 PM
Nope. Never been one either.
Joined: 8/22/2006
Msg: 47
view profile
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 4:08:55 PM
I dated a gal who was nuts . She was never satisfied with any guy she got married five times had two sons left them with the one husband . I always say to my self and others if I would have married her she would be dead and I would be in jail now Lol
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 48
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 5:37:46 PM
no,can't say that I had one,however,I did meet a psycho from pof,and has now resorted to combing the forums for whatever reason..its a shame that a grown man would do this sillyness and that now led me to block him.needless to say,Im thankful to have rid this nuisance when I did.Now If I can just stop saying so many interesting things here...(insert sarcasm)
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 49
view profile
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 6:10:27 PM
How does combing the forums qualifies as psycho? Can you clarify what made him psycho? Just curious.
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 50
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 6:17:12 PM

For some reason I find this story not to be true...There are 3 stories..His side,her side and the truth..Seriously something seems fishy about this..I call

So, you and the other skeptical f*cks here know the OP personally, and have caught him in lies before??

Yeah, didn't think so.
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 51
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 8:40:30 PM
@ cooldog..lets just say that this person was not apart of my life long enough to make a differance.but sending me long,emails reguarding past comments from the forums after from weeks of not even being friends.There ismore to the story,but when it comes to the safety of my kids i have zero tolerance..hope this answers your question..
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 52
That psyco Ex! have you every had one?
Posted: 6/25/2012 8:44:40 PM
No .

I try to choose carefully upfront.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >