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 452
Joined: 11/1/2009
Msg: 134
Hidden meanings behind giftsPage 6 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Last Christmas I got a shoe rack from my ex.I tried to fake it,plaster on a smile and pretend like I liked it,but I am a horrible liar.It is hard to muster up enthusiasm over a shoe rack.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 135
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/28/2011 9:47:02 PM
People are so funny, I got my ex a fishing pole for Valentines Day...he said it was the best gift he had ever gotten! He said most women would insist on something romantic...I listened to what he wanted...5 years later he asked me what I wanted and I wanted a *real (clarification for the kinky among us) pearl necklace, I thought they were elegant.

He came home with this huge sapphire which he said would bring out my eyes. I just looked at him speechless and he then said that pearls were too expensive, which really hurt that he didnt think I was worth the extra when he had paid over $300 for something I would never wear. Ends up if you get a graduated strand they were that much more expensive, it was just the guy behind the counter trying to make him feel like a jerk for not buying something *big and my ex was more interested in impressing him than me.

When we split up he always got my kids to buy me those heart shaped ruby and sapphire necklace / earring /ring combinations cause he knew I wouldn't like it and they thought cause it was sparkly it was pretty.

My point, is yes some people will have a hidden message in their gift but more often is one person might not listen to what the other is saying. No matter what he got her, unless it was a ring she was going to be upset. I think she had told the op earlier in the year what she did thinking the OP would tell the guy and together they would both figure out she wanted a ring.
 AnEvilgenius
Joined: 11/8/2011
Msg: 136
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/28/2011 9:56:58 PM

she has mentioned that she wanted/needed these items, but is there really hidden meanings behind gifts?


Ask your friend, she's the one that asked for them..
 bhri
Joined: 9/22/2007
Msg: 137
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/28/2011 10:37:02 PM
There is no excuse that she got upset. If she wanted an engagement ring and she did not get it is no excuse. That is not a gift that she can give a hint about, or even come straight out and say, "I want an engagement ring for Christmas" and be sure that she gets it. I do not blame the guy for having reservations.

I can not understand the defense of her behavior. She can be disappointed that she did not get a ring. But that might require discussion. Not just hints. Her reaction and embarrassing him in public shows to me that this girl needs to grow up. I can understand the bf's hesitance and reservation (especially after this last reaction).
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 138
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Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/28/2011 11:39:56 PM
^^^^ What he said in his first paragraph.

Worked with a gal that told us around Thanksgiving one year she was going to tell her BF of 2 yrs that she wanted an engagement ring, and wanted 4 carats but would settle for 3..... After we picked ourselves up off the ground and stopped laughing, we told her to let us know how that worked out... Well shortly after Christmas she appeared at work all dejected and out of sorts and one of the guys asked he if she got her ring (of course she didn't...as we could see it wasn't on her hand or being shoved in our faces) and she said no.. she didn't and he had kicked her to the curb. She just couldn't understand why.

She learned a hard lesson that you don't demand and set terms on someones affection and insist they show it by purchasing you what you want.. a gift is a gift and not to be dictated by YOUR desires unless the person giving explicitly asks you what you want.

The gal the OP posted about sounds like a Princess and wants to be set on a pedestal and worshiped and have her ego stroked by having her self worth measured in gifts that are nothing more than "proclamations" of the guys luckiness to have "obtained" her..meh..


She needs a reality check. Like other posters have stated.. Valentines Day is coming up.. Can't wait to hear about the hissy fit over THAT .
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 139
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 12:23:53 AM

My friend said extremely sarcastic, “oh great now I’m going to have to drive around for friggin days to return that crap!”


Wow just wow. How rude of her to say something like that in a public setting. I think I would have done her the honors and took them back myself and took my heart back too. Rude and ruthless to boot.

Some people are just so damned ungrateful. She sounds like the type of woman that would complain that her friend got a 3 karat diamond so she deserves no less than a 4 karat diamond. And that's just the engagement...better go all out for the wedding ring and a 20k wedding reception and honeymoon too.

Maybe she should cruise the Forbes Magazine to see if any of the big executives are single.

It's not the cost of the furniture but the all in out effort that the guy put "into" it. He drove to different places and even special ordered to ensure that they all matched. I mean she was saying how she "needed" the furniture...I normally don't take sides but she is clearly the "bad guy" in this issue.
 NewarkJohnny
Joined: 12/3/2008
Msg: 140
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Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 12:56:58 AM
As all intelligent people know.... patio furniture is the first gift given most by Cereal Killers. I say… run away and save yourself.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 141
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:16:22 AM
"I want an engagement ring for Christmas"




I got that every year which I was together with my ex!

 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 142
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:53:50 AM
A lot of women are always ranting about equality and equal rights, blah, blah, blah. If this woman really wanted to be engaged and get married, why didn't SHE buy HIM an expensive, flashy ring and propose to HIM? Why should it always be the guy to do that, especially if women are so anxious and in such a hurry to tie the knot. It sound like the guy is a puppet in the relationship anyway, so the woman should take the initiative and do the proposing and ring buying.
 forums1
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 143
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 10:19:13 AM

My friend said extremely sarcastic, “oh great now I’m going to have to drive around for friggin days to return that crap!”
WOW, it was a jaw dropping moment. One of our friends shook her head, laughed & said, “if you want I can help you write a profile for POF.” It got sooooo quiet you could hear a fish fart.
Later on my friend asked if I thought her bf would actually drop her over this. I told her I know I would. I also told her I was embarrassed by the way she treated him & I thought she should be ashamed of herself for humiliating him in front of everyone. I said a whole lot more, but we won’t go there.
This morning she called me & said she had apologized to him explaining she was disappointed with the gift because she was hoping for a ring. He said he had been considering discussing marriage with her but did not think they had gotten to that stage yet.


After that, if it were me, I'm thinking "we" wouldn't *ever* "get to that stage". Seriously, that was just completely rude and vicious of her.
 FaerieFae18
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 144
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 11:09:29 AM
452-" Last Christmas I got a shoe rack from my ex.I tried to fake it,plaster on a smile and pretend like I liked it,but I am a horrible liar.It is hard to muster up enthusiasm over a shoe rack."

I could muster up a whole lot of enthusiasm if said shoe rack came with 2-3 pairs of new shoes .....J/K or am I?

But I would agree it is the thought he put behind it I would find sweet, however the lack of communication is their problem. After, was it two years? Anyways after dating someone for a long time- For me, My man would know better because he would know how I am.

In regards to the actual gifts from previous special hooray days, as a culinary student I would be quite happy to receive a useful appliance(sp) because it would only making cooking easier and help improve my cooking but just because I said that doesn't mean I want those items for every special hooray day( being BDAY or XMas and so on) but once again it is about communication. People keep mentioning lingerie or the OP friend said she wanted those items- I also would be kind of weary of a guy who was like, " Hey Girl I was thinking about you today so I bought you some panties/drawers/underoos you sexy thang!"

Just Saying....
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 145
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 12:52:37 PM

One of our friends shook her head, laughed & said, “if you want I can help you write a profile for POF.”


No need for him to bother writing one. I’ll take him.
 GreenIdm1
Joined: 8/17/2010
Msg: 146
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 1:00:43 PM
Tricky one. I will never forget the scene in "Father of thr Bride" where the bride-to-be almost terminates the engagement when her fiancee gives her a blender as a gift. It's easy to see that lawn furniture isn't a "romantic" gift. I don't think there needs to be a "hidden meaning"; that type of gift just doesn't show that he is thinking of her gift in a way that is more romantic than, "I am buying her something she wants." Maybe they are strapped for cash and he thinks they can only afford practical items? Either way, breaking up might be extreme, but I can see how demanding that a guy give a romantic gift instead of a practical one makes it a little less... romantic.
 FaerieFae18
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 147
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 1:29:42 PM
All I know is shoe rack+ shoes= practical plus romantic in my book

Why does there have to be hidden meaning behind gifts? She said it and he bought. Sounds good to me. (just not all the time)
 452
Joined: 11/1/2009
Msg: 148
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 1:47:14 PM

But I would agree it is the thought he put behind it I would find sweet, however the lack of communication is their problem

If there was any thought behind it then it would of been sweet,however after living with me for years he knew I had six pairs of shoes including winter boots and sneakers.I am not a shoe person and do not have a shoe fetish so there was no thought at all behind it.

Still even though it was a thoughtless gift,that I strongly believe was second hand because it had mud all over it,I still cared enough to pretend to like it.
 Cuddlecakes47
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 149
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 2:16:20 PM
At least she got something, how many of us didn't get a thing? That I would like to know
 Randal5
Joined: 10/23/2009
Msg: 150
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 2:49:31 PM
The only hidden meaning I could see..... Give me practical gifts like I give you or listen to me when I verbalize things I want or need.
 OutofControlMan
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 151
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 2:51:01 PM
my ex once gave me a strap-on and a selection of dildos & vibrators for X-mas..what do you think the 'hidden meaning' behind these gifts was?
 five-marie
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 152
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History
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 2:51:40 PM
"Still even though it was a thoughtless gift,that I strongly believe was second hand because it had mud all over it,I still cared enough to pretend to like it."

And that's what people do when they care about someone. If the relationship is good otherwise this really isn't or shouldn't be a dealbreaker.

A muddy used shoe rack though, not sure even I could have pretended.
 Cuddlecakes47
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 153
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 4:13:58 PM
Ha the strap on and dildos were from her... for her, supposedly the presents she wanted and didn't get from you lol
 OutofControlMan
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 154
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 4:17:35 PM
^^


Ha the strap on and dildos were from her... for her, supposedly the presents she wanted and didn't get from you lol


the female equivalent of the guy who buys a BBQ, big screen TV, lawn furniture etc., " for" his woman? ;)
 I-am-Rei
Joined: 9/11/2009
Msg: 155
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 4:26:02 PM

my ex once gave me a strap-on and a selection of dildos & vibrators for X-mas..what do you think the 'hidden meaning' behind these gifts was?

That they are better than you??? Er...just kidding

Happy new year
 TravelerCat48
Joined: 9/18/2011
Msg: 156
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 5:07:59 PM
Talk before breaking up-he is giving her what she asks for. Unfortunately he is a man and doesn't realize a nice gem or a gift certificate to Victoria Secrets would appease (maybe he can go too, and he can choose-he pays). He is a man, no hidden meaning-just doesn't know. Guidance, talk.
 DSMTraveler
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 157
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 5:08:08 PM

... “oh great now I’m going to have to drive around for friggin days to return that crap!”... This morning she called me & said she had apologized to him explaining she was disappointed with the gift because she was hoping for a ring.


She needs to apologize (without her excuse) and she really needs to do so in a public setting with the other guests... She has publically insulted him beyond what I would forgive, I suspect she has hurt him beyond any hope of marriage. If they do stay together, I doubt she'll ever get anything more thought out than perfume for the rest of her life. ...
 Randal5
Joined: 10/23/2009
Msg: 158
Hidden meanings behind gifts
Posted: 12/29/2011 5:15:29 PM
Outofcontrolman, The "strap on" would be toublesome, but the didlos and vibrators are hot. Women who buy those items tend to be sexy, sensual and usually give as good as they expect to get. You were brave to post this in a forum, but you appear to be a guy that can appreciate humor. Where is she now?
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