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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Normal to not have passion at this age?      Home login  
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 originalNw
Joined: 11/7/2006
Msg: 87
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Normal to not have passion at this age?Page 5 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Where is it written "At this age you are not allowed " !!!! Every couple finds their own way ! You may listen to others here as well. The passion of physical contact is not always the way to find happiness to everyone. It all depends on you and your other! If you think it maybe a medical problem...contact your doctor ! Maybe a "shink " is in order as well. Everyone has their own way of thinking of the perfect way in life. Growing with someone is not just a sharing of a bank account..or having the same veiws on religion. Understanding one another,helping when a hand is needed, giving praise at a time that pain has enter , and showing love when it's not needed but there always.


 Balsamica
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 88
Normal to not have passion at this age?
Posted: 3/1/2012 11:59:08 AM
manfromthehill, I disagree that passion and intimacy aren't things people have to work on.

Fear is intimacy is all over the place, so many people are so traumatized and embittered from divorce and death, etc. that they're issues prevent them from having any relationship at all, and passion is not just physical, it has something to do with emotional intimacy, too, and if the emotional intimacy isn't there, the physical passion won't last long.
 BLONDE_ANGEL845
Joined: 6/30/2012
Msg: 89
Normal to not have passion at this age?
Posted: 2/20/2013 7:53:38 PM
Yep...this thread seems to be a repeat...same lady, same man....honey, make a decision...this is just long and tedious and you've heard it all before on the other 2 threads you started. C'mon now.

There are several pages here all filled with the same basic comments yet you continue to post? Why would you even consider introducing him to your grandchildren? In fact when would do this? You see the guy one night a week. He isn't interested in meeting your grandchildren. He is interested in having a one night a week companion. Not going to change, he has made that abundantly clear. Not only would I not waste my time introducing him to anyone in my family, I wouldn't waste any more time on him. But that's your decision to make. Apparently you prefer crumbs to the whole loaf of bread.

Everyone keeps telling you the same thing, but you don't really seem to be listening, or don't want to hear. You are desperately looking for a way to justify and defend your relationship with this man. Every time someone points out the obvious (that this is not a normal or healthy relationship), you find an excuse to explain it away.

After re-reading your responses, my sense is that you did not really start this thread because you had a question about whether your relationship was normal. You already know the answer to that question (it's not). Seems more like you are looking for validation. Since most people are posting honestly and candidly, I don't think you're going to get it here. Sorry. I know that's not what you want to hear, but based on the circumstances that you have provided, it's the way it is.


whoomp there it is...
 mjinict
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 90
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Normal to not have passion at this age?
Posted: 2/20/2013 8:47:39 PM
Yes, it's me and we are doing just fine, thank you very much. Dozen roses on V day and still lots of laughs and special times. Get over it ANgel.
 OC28AV99
Joined: 2/1/2013
Msg: 91
Normal to not have passion at this age?
Posted: 2/20/2013 9:52:04 PM
I agree that passion has many definitions, and marriage has never been just about passion at any age, anyways. Sometimes it's just compatability that lights the fire at this stage, or just feeling secure that they want to take care of you and your children. I myself will admit that feeling secure in my significant other to care of my family as I would is enough to ignite that passion, which I think is born out of trust.... So I'd say that if you lack passion in your relationship at this stage, then there may be these deeper trust issues involved that are hampering it. Just saying....:)
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 92
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Normal to not have passion at this age?
Posted: 2/21/2013 12:42:01 AM
not a question of normal. is it "healthy" for both participants? you decide for yourself. my experience, now seeing someone who cares for me over a long period of time, if the potential partner is into you, a way will be found. but yes, as you get older, the energy is not like it used to be.

for example, we are geographically separated for now. i can't do the drive to his place given my lyme disease. the roads are so curvy even "normal" people have some trouble with them. so, he comes here for the weekend and i hop a bus to see him during the week if possible. we both put a lot into it. but, it is a chemistry and strong friendship factor the drives us. for some, they need "awakening" of passion, but it won't happen w/o motivation! aside from that he emails me every morning, we speak at lunchtime, after he gets out from work and before bedtime. not face to face, but ear to mouth.

do we have any problems? sure. but we put the time and "face time" into working them out. by the way, i never heard of face time before. i was thinking at first you were talking about sexual preferences!!!
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