Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Debisusanne
Joined: 5/3/2011
Msg: 26
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?Page 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Out of all my ex's there is ONE that has a maybe stamped on him.

And he is dancing around me in the now sense.

I put him soundly in the friend zone and I am watching his moves.

I know.. and he knows it will NOT work between us..

But.. i Miss him!
 Bauxite
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 27
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 5:00:30 AM
I find my ex and I are better as friends. We raised children and will always have a connection. I do believe he knows that he made a mistake. One that I was willing to forgive. I know understand divorce has made me a stronger, self sufficent person. I do regret that he felt he could find happiness elsewhere and he wonders now why it didn"t work out. Sometimes you don't appreciate what you have until it is gone. Took a long time for the grown sons to accept his behavior. But I understand boredom. I didn't feel risking our retirement, future plans and 30 year marriage was worth being with an unfaithful woman. Ironically he continues to fly 1500 miles a year to visit. But as for a reuniting, its not in the cards.
 Chrisdan57
Joined: 1/31/2012
Msg: 28
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 11:46:19 AM
Depends on why you broke up. Normally the issues that existed then still exist now.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 29
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 11:54:14 AM
OP, it would completely depend on what caused the breakup and whether those causes remain or have since been resolved.
 statemachine500
Joined: 8/25/2011
Msg: 30
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 6:18:28 PM
Pure Sentiment,name fits you well.But this seems an unhealthy thought process.Mostly I think I would momentarily consider a bullet in the head to going back.The road is ahead.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 31
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 7:59:18 PM
If she was single, available, and the issues that got between us
were no longer there.....sure.
 Broadway_Bess
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 32
view profile
History
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/6/2012 8:25:27 PM
Only one of them. My first boyfriend.
Such a great guy & I was such a pain in his arse.
20+, a stoopid age when it comes to emotions and love.
I would want to see him again, mostly to apologize.

bb
 Devilsfan58
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 33
view profile
History
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/7/2012 3:17:46 AM
Only as an act of compassion such as in sickness or bad health... I keep thinking about "The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who in time of moral crisis preserve their neutrality."

Iz scared....
 Blah_User_Name
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 34
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/8/2012 9:47:05 AM
I've done this - many, many years ago but I wouldn't do it again. If it didn't work the first time round, why would it the second go ?
 HappinessOK
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 35
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/8/2012 6:33:50 PM
I have gone back to an ex that I kept bumping into..very uncanny .. each time we would see each other for a couple of weeks then it would end..then a few months later we'd bump into each other again ..this went on for a couple of years...

Was very weird how we kept bumping into each other in and out of town in the most obscure places.

Thankfully we havent seen each other a while now and I hope whatever magnet their was that brought us together so many times have vanished.
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 36
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/8/2012 7:12:05 PM
OP:
It really depends on the ex...

I still care for my ex's and pray for their happiness but my ex husband is gay, so no. My college boyfriend was engaged to another woman at the same time he was engaged to me, so no, my ex-fiance chased skirt and took my money, so probably not and two of my ex-boyfriends are dead now so definitely not.

But the man I am seeing now was someone I initally broke up with...he thought it was ok to ask an ex for a second chance and we are as happy as can be.
 paulajenel
Joined: 1/21/2009
Msg: 37
view profile
History
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 2/9/2012 7:39:23 PM
Five years ago I would have said yes. I wouldn't now, the trust was destroyed and to much hurt. We can talk at times but that's it. I would like the $900.00 I'm owed though.
 Forestsnow
Joined: 2/11/2009
Msg: 38
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 7:11:22 AM
Only one and that was because it was only circumstance of distance that we broke up.
 STEVE4U22
Joined: 11/23/2011
Msg: 39
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 7:35:57 AM
I was wondering when this subject would come up. Were it not for the fact she is Bi-Polar, yes i would with no doubts but it was for that reason i had to get out. After being there for her for 20+yrs. During the last yr. or so, it was like she turned on me. I was dealing with verbal abuse regularly & just trying to stay out of her way. Our Daughter was 19 she moved out 3 months before i did.
 Sciencetreker
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 40
view profile
History
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 7:47:14 AM
No, my girlfriend wouldn't approve.
 STEVE4U22
Joined: 11/23/2011
Msg: 41
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 8:36:34 AM
Humm apparently Thread-Killers do exist, & i'm one of em! Mybad lol!!
 Sunshinelady555
Joined: 4/10/2012
Msg: 42
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 9:30:03 AM
If I really liked the guy and he was nice, and we departed
in good terms. Yes, I would give it a second chance, as long
as I was still single. lol
 FUNNYGIRLoo
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 43
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/5/2012 9:44:58 AM
I did go back and it did not work out.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 44
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/6/2012 12:58:11 AM
In the past in theory yes, pragmatically was never going to happen, in the future would never consider going back if I break up with someone new.

Two long term GFs are like an ex to me.

1) First GF ever, we were together 10 years. Now she is married and has early onset Alzheimer’s. I checked into her status a year after I got divorced, she is about 55 now.
2) Second GF, she is over 70 now and I contacted her a few years ago, but we still can fight like cats and dogs, age has not mellowed either of us.
3) Ex-wife, she is 66, she asked for help to get a Catholic annulment so she could apply to be a nun.

I would have gotten together with first GF had she been available, second GF I contracted because I only wanted to chat about old times. Ex-wife, not much hope of a romantic relationship with someone that wants to become a Catholic nun, which is the reason I suggested she file for divorce in the first place.

So never did get back together with anyone, and now I doubt I would give reconciliation a thought if in the future I break up with anyone.

Happier now with how everything is turning out, so glad I never got the chance to go back.
 stellavixen
Joined: 2/17/2012
Msg: 45
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/6/2012 12:59:28 AM
Grrrr my x husband messaged me on facebook recently and I was dumb enough to chat with him on the phone.

NO

I am surprised we did not divorce sooner!
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 46
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/6/2012 8:50:12 AM
^^^ My ex was a really nice person, the best cook I ever met, certainly would never get involved with another man. If I were 80 when we got married it might have worked out. She eventually got a job being the cook / housekeeper for the rectory . They do a lot of dinners to entertain visitors , local contributors, visiting Bishops.

But she rather thought enjoying sex was a sin and her communication style would be the envy of KGB agents. It was amusing that she would correct a priest on their conduct. I did get to visit inside of a cloistered convent in Germany, not many people and even fewer males get past the front gates. But those were the nuns that raised her when she was aged 9-15, so she thought of the mother superior as her real mother.

I understood her past and why she was that way, and when we met she was reserved but more passionate. But at the point we met while she went to Church she felt alienated from her religion, thus I suspect she felt she was already condemned, and behaved as more of a fallen women. Through no real fault of her own, just some misunderstanding she had and her lack of ability to communicate effectively. She is very adverse to talking about anything about herself.

Being married did to a lot from my own ability to read people and communicate, at first I didn't really communicate my own needs well.

When we got married outside of the Church I knew her problems with being a good Catholic were easily resolved and thought she would feel more relaxed with me sexually if I that part of her life was in good standing. So I talked to the pastor about getting things resolved.

But after getting married in the Church she went towards living a married monastic life. I am sure my frustration was causing me to act out in other ways.

Divorce was the perfect solution from a lot of angles, the timing solved emotional problems for me and also eliminated a lot of financial problems as well. Financially, it was a rather artistic solution.

I avoid dating Catholics, I know most are only cafeteria catholics, but I have an aversion to a faith that is so negative about sexuality.
 tuloa942
Joined: 2/21/2012
Msg: 47
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/6/2012 4:22:00 PM
I would not go back with my former husband. He still has the ability to hit my triggers! Too much "stuff" to deal with although we do maintain a civil relationship for our sons who are now grown. We still have weddings and eventually shared grandchildren to deal with so it's best to keep acting like adults.

There is one boyfriend since my divorce that I wonder if I would go back with him if it were possible. Part of me says yes, in a second! I not only loved him but adored him! (Plus the intimate relations with him was the best I've had!) But then I remember the issues that caused me to break it off. The most difficult issue being that he would not admit to his ADHD and would self medicate with beer. Unless he has worked on some of his life lessons, I could not go back with him. The point is moot since he has remarried and is still self-medicating. Ah well. I deserve better...
 zippytwo
Joined: 6/7/2006
Msg: 48
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/6/2012 4:30:55 PM
I've only one 'ex' and it would be tricky as he is married again. He was a good guy actually, but had lots of 'stuff' that wasn't positive to the marriage....someone else said it on here, when I do run into him it only takes about 5 minutes of talking to him and 'it all comes back'. I start to remember the things that drove me crazy. He doesn't appear to have changed. But he is the father of my children, we were both great parents and now we get along just fine.
 Debisusanne
Joined: 5/3/2011
Msg: 49
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/7/2012 1:35:37 PM
my ex husband.. NO NO NO NO NO..

Any of my ex b/fs?.. only one.. and to be honest.. ive had the chance.. and I just felt it was too risky.. Tho.. in my FANTASIES it might have worked.
 MDIYM59
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 50
Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?
Posted: 5/7/2012 5:11:15 PM
There is only one woman from my past I would even consider getting back with, and if I did run into her, there is no guarantee I would try to reignite and old flame. But it would be an exhilarating intense experience, that's for sure. LOL
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Would you go back to an Ex you really cared about?