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 jasonsgt
Joined: 1/30/2011
Msg: 96
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Would you date a sarcastic woman? Page 5 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
Nope, had enough of that to last a lifetime! It wasn't funny and reeked of insecurity...no witty banter here. If you have the balls to cut someone down with a smile on your face, why not cut the passive aggressive BS and tell them straight up how you really feel? It's cowardice, to say the least. ...but I'll put a smile on my face as I show you the door. Though, I experienced sarcasm intended to hurt. I think using it to describe irony would be tolerable, as long as she doesn't over do it...but I wouldn't stick around to find out if initially, she let me know she was a sarcastic person.
 Theme_Pack
Joined: 5/3/2013
Msg: 97
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 10/31/2013 5:11:39 AM
I don't do well with boring!
There are many intelligent Sarcastic women and some not so much. I get along well with both. I use it as a form of flirting and it works for me....Some people don't like it because they can't do it very well....and look at it like some form of elicit criticism when directed at them(boohoo). There is a time and place for everything.
And who the heck keeps reporting my profile pic ...Geesh!
 CaptainTeebs
Joined: 11/10/2012
Msg: 98
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/1/2013 6:50:38 AM
what are you wearing


Now that is funny; is it sarcasm?
 talldarklove
Joined: 12/11/2012
Msg: 99
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/1/2013 8:02:51 AM
At my age no, as a teen I may have had more patients for such games. Sarcasm is not really a big deal, and for the most part is harmless I feel there just isn't a need for it. If so the use of sarcasm should be limited, being known as a sarcastic person may lead to people not taking that person seriously.

-Kevin.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 100
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/1/2013 1:09:34 PM
I thought it was saying the opposite of what you mean, like "I'm okay. Don't mind the sword protruding from my back. I'm fine. Feel like a million bucks." I think I have the wrong idea. Eek, lol.

It commonly refers to meaning the opposite of what you said... I would say that is sarcastic. But it's not necessarily the Opposite of what you say. It's negative-aimed humor. Usually to bash, but not necessarily so much. But if a guy or gal is consumed with sarcasm, they've got some emotional problems.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 101
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Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/9/2013 8:22:11 AM


I thought it was saying the opposite of what you mean, like "I'm okay. Don't mind the sword protruding from my back. I'm fine. Feel like a million bucks." I think I have the wrong idea. Eek, lol.
It commonly refers to meaning the opposite of what you said... I would say that is sarcastic. But it's not necessarily the Opposite of what you say. It's negative-aimed humor. Usually to bash, but not necessarily so much. But if a guy or gal is consumed with sarcasm, they've got some emotional problems.


Did this v post of mine just go over everyone's heads?


...yes, I'm seeing in this thread that more people than I thought are kind of in the dark as to what they think "being sarcastic" is about. For some dumbassed reason, apparently a lot of people think that the word "sarcastic" simply means being funny, like it refers to all things funny, or smart-assed. That's not the case. A few different types of humor styles or literary humor devices are as follows (and these are just as pulled out of my arse, even this list may not be technically correctly representational) -

- Exaggeration/Hyperbole
- Incongruity
- Slapstick
- Parody
- Satire
- Sarcasm (classified as an "aggressive humor" (demeaning), along with the prejudices of as sexism and racism, and is related to higher levels of neuroticism and lower levels of conscientiousness.)
- Pun
- Irony
- Dry/Deadpan
- High brow/Witty
- Self-deprecation
- Farce
- Affiliative
- Self-enhancing

So, exactly what do people think that they mean, and what do they really mean, when they cheerfully describe themselves as being sarcastic?


The first quote in this post might be irony, and dry/deadpan...but that's not what sarcasm is.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 102
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/9/2013 10:59:00 AM

Did this v post of mine just go over everyone's heads?

No, it didn't... but I also looked it up, so just because I go by what I look up doesn't mean what you wrote went over my head. :)

The first quote in this post might be irony, and dry/deadpan...but that's not what sarcasm is.

Sarcasm is kind of broad. It commonly means "the opposite" (but not required), but basically, much like you pointed out, negative humor (if you can call that 'aggressive'). It can be self-inflicted. It doesn't require sexism or racism exactly (but common).

So the quote "I'm okay. Don't mind the sword protruding from my back. I'm fine. Feel like a million bucks." -- she's being sarcastic. It's actually saying "Yeah, you hurt me, you back stabbing idiot". Just because it doesn't incorporate sexism or racism doesn't free it from being sarcastic.
 DoubleParked
Joined: 10/22/2008
Msg: 105
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/13/2013 5:19:40 PM
I haven't dated women, so don't know about any perceived difference there would be from dating sarcastic men. Some posters here are quite sarcastic and/or sharply analytical and I doubt if I would be able to hold my own with them in ordinary conversation--- Unable to keep up with their intelligent discourse, no doubt my head, as so many lost their heads in days gone by, when those opposing them spoke up against the bullies, would be staring up at them in the basket below the guillotine, blinking blankly. Huh??

Quick wittedness, on the other hand< that's a good thing!
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 106
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Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/14/2013 8:03:28 PM
It might have went over your head a bit. I showed how sarcasm is related to, and includes, racism and sexism, not that it's defined by it. And, "oppositeness" is not a part of sarcasm. That's what the word 'ironic' is for. The quote in question might be a dry irony, or an ironic deadpan statement. But it's not an example of sarcasm.

This is why understanding thoughtful use of words is important - some people in this thread are unknowingly talking about one thing but thinking that they're talking about something else...everyone using the same word, "sarcasm", but talking about very different things without knowing it...so when they express their opinions about it and whether or not they'd date someone who is this or that, the opinions and debating doesn't make sense, but they don't realize it. Incorrect understanding of words, and incorrect use of those words, causes misperceptions in other areas without the person being aware of it.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 107
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/14/2013 9:12:48 PM
Straight from Google's dictionary of ironic:

using or characterized by irony.
"his mouth curved into an ironic smile"
synonyms: sarcastic, sardonic, cynical, mocking, satirical, caustic, wry More

Words have multiple meanings. And it doesn't require opposite Meaning for irony, but also opposite of what you expect, which is funny.

Straight from Google's dictionary of sarcastic:

marked by or given to using irony in order to mock or convey contempt.
"sarcastic comments on their failures"
synonyms: sardonic, ironic, ironical;

merriam-webster.com of sarcasm:


the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say especially in order to insult someone, to show irritation, or to be funny

Definitions from credible sources vary. But in essence, sarcasm often includes the opposite to razz someone or something. "Yeah, she's a REAL looker alright..." (looking at 300lb obese lady in overalls).

Again, words have varying definitions.

Sarcasm can be light-hearted and non-harmful, but just razzing instead of actually being mean. But yeah, it's usually negative-oriented from some perspective at least (or better put, not a Positive-oriented thing). People who are "haters" love sarcasm, with their rapist wit! lol
 drivingharmony2
Joined: 6/23/2013
Msg: 108
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/14/2013 9:20:34 PM
^^^^YES!!!!! I knew I wasn't a mean person! Sarcastic can be light-hearted and non-harmful......I knew it!!! Ahhh, now I can sleep peacefully tonight :)
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 109
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Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 3:21:39 AM
confident realist...well, that sucks, that you can find that in a search. Because that's not what they are.

The thread question isn't asking if you'd date a woman who's funny, or has a sense of humor. And the fact that it's asked implies some element that's potentially obnoxious or put-offish to some. I figure that should at least be an indicator.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 110
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 5:34:56 AM
What's funny is when the dictionary writers write an ambiguous definition. Which is what Merriam-Webster did in their SHORT definition of sarcasm. It is clarified in the FULL definition.

This is the short definition:


the use of words that mean the opposite of what you really want to say especially in order to insult someone, to show irritation, or to be funny

versus



Full Definition of SARCASM
1: a sharp and often satirical or ironic utterance designed to cut or give pain
2
a : a mode of satirical wit depending for its effect on bitter, caustic, and often ironic language that is usually directed against an individual
b : the use or language of sarcasm


When used as a Boolean operator, the word "or" makes the clauses independent so we could read the definition as CR explained it in his post. But the full definition does not support that reading. The full definition's 3 sub-definitions (there's probably a word for that but I don't know it. We probably need igor for that one ;-) contain meanness as a element of the meaning. In other words, going by the full definition, using opposite wording merely to be funny (without an element of intended pain, bitterness, irritation) is not sufficient to be sarcasm.

Then how are we supposed to interpret the short definition's, supposedly, independent clause "or to be funny"?
It is not meant to imply that anything funny is sarcasm. It is meant to imply that using words in their opposite meaning to cut, give pain, or be bitter/caustic/ironic against another person can be funny. An apparently is - to some people.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 2/24/2012
Msg: 111
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 5:36:41 AM

^^^^YES!!!!! I knew I wasn't a mean person! Sarcastic can be light-hearted and non-harmful......I knew it!!! Ahhh, now I can sleep peacefully tonight :)

You can still be a not mean person. Just stop describing your form of humor as sarcasm. Call it by it's correct term - irony (or whatever). Easy peazy.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 112
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 6:29:25 AM
I knew I wasn't a mean person!

i know mean people who aren't sarcastic, and sarcastic people who aren't mean. so i'm not so sure why some people want to make a big deal out of sarcasm as if they were being personally crucified by it on a daily basis. it's simple enough to say you don't like that brand of humor and get back to your jerry lewis films, or is it spongebob squarepants that amuses you.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 113
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 6:43:21 AM
LOL; I'm another in the camp of not being mean who likes the definition. Yet another who can sleep in the ranks :)

Irony and a dry sense of humor must come from my British/Irish side, but in my case it's not to convey contempt at ALL. It's to actually show I'm comfortable around someone and playfully teasing... means I like their company. The people I am try as dust to and NOT doing the irony thing? I am not comfortable or don't like them very much. But since half my jokes are missed because my delivery is deadpan, I find out in a hurry who's on my wavelength and who isn't. Though I don't describe myself as sarcastic per se; just tongue in cheek :)

So in my case, it's a compliment.
 drivingharmony2
Joined: 6/23/2013
Msg: 114
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 7:20:29 AM
Cynthia: I'm not a mean person :) This is just one of those terms (sarcastic) that people attach different meanings to.
Interestingly enough, I've been described as having a sarcastic, dry, ironic, etc....sense of humor. And these people are some of my closest friends.....I doubt they'd be my friend if I was mean. And I slept like a baby last night :)
 CallmeKen
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 115
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 7:53:32 AM

Would you enjoy a great companionship by a sarcastic woman?

It depends on the timing. If we're in an established relationship, and you want to kick me in the butt or get me back on my To Do list, a little sarcasm is appreciated.

If you are on the coffee date, and think that my buying you a mocha latte entitles you to rip me a new one, well, I have 99 problems, but a b-tch ain't one. Save the drama for Obama. Care.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 116
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 9:21:45 AM

What's funny is when the dictionary writers write an ambiguous definition.

But some words are ambiguous, or give multiple vague definitions, etc. I think what is taken in common with them all is that it's often negative, often ironic, and/or often dealing with the opposite of the words they're actually saying (tone).

"YAH... he Always gets out of these situations unscathed... (rolling eyes)!" (Your team's pitcher has the bases loaded, with nobody out and has a 5.50 ERA)

"Nooo, you're the sweetest gal in the whole world who never looks incredibly fat in those jeans... (rolling eyes)"

The latter is being a mean person.... the former is just an attempt to inject a bit of humorous tone with some frustration that anyone (fan) would have.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 117
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Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 11/15/2013 5:29:12 PM
...and so, my original point should be taken as this - satire, or irony, or dryness might be an element of sarcasm. But that isn't what defines sarcasm. A car has a bumper, or a motor...but that's not what a car is. To make a sarcastic remark, you have to use words - words are included, but you wouldn't define sarcasm by saying "it's when you use words." That would be kind of dumb.

But anywho...yes, my personal opinion is that sarcasm isn't automatically bad or obnoxious. It can be a fun playful teasing between people. But then, this is often the result of having developed a rapport with someone - sometimes the first time you interact with someone, playful sarcasm can be natural and taken well right from the beginning...but, when someone assumes this rapport with a stranger, as if they "know them like that", they run the risk of rubbing them a bad way; and, when someone is describable as being sarcastic, as opposed to just occasionally entertaining a sarcastic playfulness, that implies that they are that way too often and with people that they don't have this rapport with, being presumptuous, and it implies that they aren't very creative or capable in their humor-style, which can make them boring pretty quickly. These are the implications that I think at least possibly resides in asking "would you date a sarcastic woman?" If you mean any other thing when bothering to ask a question like that, then it wouldn't make sense to bother to ask the question.
 elmuchoburrito
Joined: 8/27/2013
Msg: 118
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 12/1/2013 6:39:40 PM
biting dry wit with a thin veil of civility ? ooooh be calm my beating heart.
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 119
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 12/2/2013 9:20:39 AM
No, definitely not. I wouldn't date a woman. Sarcastic or otherwise. I have never been told I was sarcastic, although on many occasions, I have been called, a "smartass", LOL imagine that!
 aanarchist
Joined: 8/23/2013
Msg: 120
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 12/9/2013 7:30:13 AM
As long as she doesn't act like a f*cking man. Idk whats up with those self proclaimed independent women who claim to speak their mind, may as well speak your mind and just say you're rude and have a big mouth. Ladies that are ladylike are dwindling in numbers :(
I also get that gentlemen are also dwindling before anyone decides to take offense and retort in a snarky manner.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 121
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 12/9/2013 8:55:30 AM

No, definitely not. I wouldn't date a woman. Sarcastic or otherwise. I have never been told I was sarcastic, although on many occasions, I have been called, a "smartass", LOL imagine that!


LOL! Yeah, I second this. But my being called a smartass is never meant to insult or belittle; it's a sign I'm comfortable and trust that the other person is going to know that I'm teasing.

(the only people who have called me sarcastic are onlookers people who are extremely literal and uber hyper sensitive to any kind of anything; where they watch me and someone I've known for ages fling it back and forth while enjoying it thoroughly; only to have the onlooker not get it and be horrified.

It's the third party armchair quarterbacks who don't get that kind of interaction; but I"m not going to change an ongoing relationship with someone that both of us uber appreciate for someone small minded who does not get the volleys are fun, challenging and a blast for both of us to do. I would get disowned by the other party if I all of a sudden talked formal, stilted and totally deadpan literal all the time. They wouldn't know what to do with me.
 MutedEnthusiasm
Joined: 7/8/2011
Msg: 122
Would you date a sarcastic woman?
Posted: 12/9/2013 9:32:02 PM
[snuffle snore…] wait… wha what’d they say?


They wouldn't know what to do with me.

oh ok sorry, guess I heard that out of context… thought I was delerious for a coupla secs there…


[dodders off back to the armchair]
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