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 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 101
wtf????Page 5 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)

astrosky:
Its too bad that one of the posters finds coffee dates "boring" but for a first time meet, I find them ideal because I can just focus on the other person and what they have to say.


So you prefer the interrogation/job interview method of meeting someone and sitting nose-to-nose with rehearsed questions and answers. You say you want to focus on what a person says. All you're going to hear at an initial meet are answers to your questions that he thinks what you want to hear, just like at a job interview. You won't know anymore about him than before, other than if there's physical attraction.

There's no way of knowing if walking around Walmart was the only thing they were going to do. Maybe he planned on taking her for a coffee or meal afterwards, if he was still interested in her after the walk. But since she ditched him when he mentioned the Walmart part, she'll never know.

The more I think about it, the more it makes sense to do this. As well as talking, you might find out about a person's shopping habits. If a woman complains that everything in Walmart is cheap Chinese garbage and would never set foot in one and she only shops at (store name) that sells $800 designer purses and $500 shoes, then you get a clearer picture of who she is.
 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 102
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:24:46 AM

Personally, I think a first date in Walmart, or any store, really, would be just plain weird. Unless a) it was a store that catered to interests that we shared, as some suggested sporting goods, or say, art supply stores


Walmart HAS sporting goods, and a million other things anyone is interested in.


Just to go loiter in Walmart for no particular reason would seem weird to me though.


One doesn't have to "loiter" at Walmart.
One can spend hours walking all of those aisles and looking at stuff, riding the bikes, playing with the toys, trying on clothes.

 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 103
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:42:12 AM

Touche, I suppose that's true enough.


Gracias.
If you really think about it, 2 people with the right attitude and personalities could make a morning, afternoon, or evening at Walmart a fun adventure.

 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 104
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:42:38 AM
Its too bad that one of the posters finds coffee dates "boring"


I did a coffee date one time...ONE TIME. I found that it wasn't so bad after all. Well, at least with that guy.

Instead of sitting across from someone "talking," I would rather much be getting to know the guy while doing something active. I have found that bowling is very good for that. Me and my date get to converse, and have fun at the same time.

Plus, it's "cheap." You can't be $5 a bowl.


Seriously if anyone is genuinely interested in another person where you go matters not.


Bull. It matters to me where me, and my date goes. Though I'm interested in the guy, taking a stroll through the sewer is not exactly good taste.
 twotru
Joined: 1/22/2010
Msg: 105
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:44:50 AM
I think I'm going to go to Walmart and get one of those turkey/bacon/avocado subs and check out the guys in the sporting goods and garden/outdoor departments.
 0ldhag
Joined: 1/8/2012
Msg: 106
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 11:48:09 AM

Bull. It matters to me where me, and my date goes. Though I'm interested in the guy, taking a stroll through the sewer is not exactly good taste.


Why would anyone who cares about anyone take them to the lowest of the lowest ????

I'd want to take my man to the most amazing place I could, and walmart just isn't it.
 lacalli
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 107
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 12:20:58 PM

I think I'm going to go to Walmart and get one of those turkey/bacon/avocado subs and check out the guys in the sporting goods and garden/outdoor departments.

Nah, Walmart for the 6 inch (why do I always seem like the only person who's self-conscious saying that at Subway?) and Home Depot for the men.
 Padawan61
Joined: 3/1/2008
Msg: 108
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 12:59:41 PM
^^^^^Depends on how you say it at Subway. If you said ... "give me the 6 incher" while smacking your lips, I'm sure the guys next to you will be waggling their eyes ... as some may even kindly accommodate with a "foot long".
 twotru
Joined: 1/22/2010
Msg: 109
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 1:15:31 PM


Oh my oh wow LOL!!!
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 110
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 1:22:04 PM
See what I mean? (post 117)

Some of the women on this site are a little strange. "anywhere is good" means to them, lets abuse the guy! Rats, babysit,skunk, fix her property, shows a true lack of respect, or labor for HER benefit.

The book signing might work out OK, he could spend some time with her, then look at books or periodicals that interest him. Depending on the store they might even get a cup of joe. Hahahaha!

Yeah I know she was being funny. While tongue in cheek is highly amusing, it also usually belies a person who has contempt, for others.

How about volunteering at a soup kitchen? How about joining the big cancer walk? Or helping at a blood drive, for part of the day?

Now some of these would involve the labor she suggested, benefit many, but not either of us.

Gawd don't you people ever get tired of putting down people becuase they embrace a less expensive date? Frankly I get tired of the same old grind, repeated day after day on here.

The issue for most guys is REALLY simple. There are many women, you get to meet quite a few. Many however turn out to be NOT what you are seeking.(who cares what the reason is) So you end up on a boatload of first and second dates, then nothing.

When most women, expect a man to pay, or he is viewed as inferior or cheap, it doesn't seem right. They have judged him, on something they can never be judged for, or face as an issue. They merely say "next" and keep their wallets tightly gripped in their hand.

So in 2 months, of say 6 meetings a month, at $80 a piece. The guys are out almost $1,000. Now what has it cost those women? BUPKIS!!

I'm not trying to start a flame war, a gender disagreement or any other horsesh1t. I'm trying to get THOSE women, who embrace "the guy always pays" just how expensive it really can be.

Now please save the "I don'ts", if you believe in equality, thank you for being understanding and putting forth the effort. Nor give me the "whoever asks, should pay", women by a great majority never ask, so paying for them will never be an issue. In fact, I have read my share of stories where even when women DO ask, the guy is cheap if he doesn't pay.

"which is subjective"

Now where is subjective? Choice of venue? Choice of cost? Choice of who pays?
 RT_2
Joined: 11/5/2010
Msg: 111
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 1:29:20 PM
Post #122 exhibits the typical gold digging, high maintenance mentality shown by many POF women in their profile text and forum posts.

I'm financially stable because I don't waste big bucks on dates. My income is gainful because I don't waste big bucks on dates. When women say they want someone financially stable, gainfully employed, smart with money, etc, they mean just the opposite: they want a fool who lives paycheck to paycheck from spending all his money on her (or doing expensive things with her if she's rich and willing to pay her way).

The post also has the word "career", another sure sign of high maintenance. I hit the back button on any profile that says the man must have a career.

Good posts, Mainely!
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 112
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 1:37:41 PM
Who pays 80 dollars for a meal, etc. the first time they meet ? Lots of women pay for their own meal, drinks, etc. which usually does not cost anywhere near forty dollars. Some people always go dutch, some men pay for everything...if people would merely be honest before meeting then some situations could possibly be avoided. Guess some women pay for both, when I have offered to do that the men have declined my offers.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 113
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 2:00:45 PM

Guess some women pay for both, when I have offered to do that the men have declined my offers.


How persistent were you in your offer to pay-at least your half? When I've been out on a dinner or coffee date, and the woman makes an offer to contribute to the bill, I don't resist and I don't do the Mr. Macho Man routine: "That's OK. I'll pay the whole thing every time." It doesn't matter to me if the woman is shocked that I took her up on her offer. I have more respect for someone who isn't expecting a free meal and drinks every time we're out.
 GodsChild750
Joined: 1/14/2012
Msg: 114
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 2:05:58 PM
Walmart on a date is very weird. Was this just a meet and greet? I don't blame you for not agreeing to this. You were good for even suggesting a different venue. I would have dismissed the Walmart idea and dismissed him all together.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 115
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 2:26:39 PM
"Who pays 80 dollars for a meal"

Depends on who you are, what you can afford. I suppose Applebee's, Olive Garden, etc would be cheaper, lets say by half, that still puts the guy out $500 for the 2 month example.

I do what I want, just like everyone else, that's my right! So I like restaurants a cut above the ones mentioned, appetizers, entree's $15-20, a couple of****ails or a bottle of wine, dessert, with the tip, it's right around $80.

Then again, that's me. Oh and guys save the garbage about my being foolish or spending too much on a first date. That's my choice, you feel free to make yours.

Now to the crux,

"merely be honest before meeting"

Funny, reading the forums, honesty is a rare commodity on here! I won't go into the rest of what you said, it's just gibberish, in terms of the mindset of some women.

Funny, I've read the profiles of women, how they think, the flowery phrases meant to show a balanced and honest person. Then they post about the guy who wanted to go dutch and how he was a 'cheapo' or there would be no second date based NOT on his personality, looks or other things, based solely on his not offering to pick up the check!

"men have declined my offers"

Well given he is not a mind reader, may like you enough to have more than one date. How is he to know, if you will give him the heave-ho, if he DOESN'T pick up the tab? How is he to know, you will not hop onto a thread here and pillor him as a 'cheapo'?

Now as for the angry guys on this thread, please save the critiques of women, ALL women are not the same! Labeling or slandering them, accomplishes nothing. Don't inflame, discuss.

If this issue infuriates you, then maybe you should take a breath, before saying something you will regret.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 116
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 3:13:59 PM
I cannot fathom not offering to pay for my share the first time I meet someone. Many of us enjoy fine dining, and would be fine with sharing the expense. So many factors involved in playing this game we call love or lust or like.No wonder it sometimes seems like a nightmare.
 astrosky
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 117
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 3:37:31 PM
Thanks, everybody for your comments.

I just got back from Walmart. In case anybody wants to analyze my purchases, I bought a ChairMat (the thingy under your office chair so it rolls better on carpet), a nightgown, a box of RidX, a bag of spinach and some fresh whole mushrooms. Geesh it was crowded, and loud, and crazy. So was the McDonalds there. I didn't see anybody who looked like they were dating in there - but I saw a lot of rowdy kids dragging their parents that way.

I prefer to have coffee dates at IHOP - its usually not very crowded, and the local police hang out there frequently. The walking trail I normally suggest goes right past the police station, through a playground, past the pool and other public areas. So its not like I'm going to compromise any poor man's safety and make him meet me in a dark alley behind Walmart to shoot rats.



So you prefer the interrogation/job interview method of meeting someone and sitting nose-to-nose with rehearsed questions and answers. You say you want to focus on what a person says. All you're going to hear at an initial meet are answers to your questions that he thinks what you want to hear, just like at a job interview. You won't know anymore about him than before, other than if there's physical attraction.


Wrong! In fact I state just the opposite in other threads I've posted on. I don't follow any sort of a script, I don' t like the interrogation thing. So I'm a good listener. I usually just kick back, ask a question or 2 to prime his pump, and let him talk to his heart's content. Its a good method to let a person tell you what's on their mind - and that's usually a gold mine of not-so-ready-for-prime-time info. My last date felt so comfortable with me he let me know that he has to sneak to go see his doctor - because one of his kids or his ex wife might recognize his car, and they're still angry with him because he ditched them all and ran off with a gold-digger. He was perfectly entitled though, because his wife stopped having sex with him. He does understand why his kids are upset because he let the golddigger take him for 80k instead of giving the money to them, but hey, he was sexually infatuated (because she had a hot body but her face wasn't all that) and couldn't say no.

Try to get a story like that out of a scripted interrogation with the "usual questions". I think I got a much clearer picture of his character than I would have observing whether he buys crunchy or smooth peanut butter at Wally World.
 TraveliciousGuy
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 118
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 4:17:39 PM

I prefer to have coffee dates at IHOP


And there's free pancakes there on Tuesday.


to prime his pump,


Now I know you didn't think through that choice of words before you typed them.

 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 119
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:03:30 PM

Always assume off the bat if the man pays for coffee or drinks, the woman is obligated to give the guy a BJ. Always assume off the bat if the man pays for a meal, the woman is obligated to sleep with the man and have wild passionate sex all night.


So what's new? You guys have been assuming that for years and years….minus the wild passionate sex all night, of course. More like get your rocks off, roll over and start snoring, or zip up and head out.


How persistent were you in your offer to pay-at least your half? … I have more respect for someone who isn't expecting a free meal and drinks every time we're out.


Of course she wasn’t persistent enough and did it wrong, she’s a woman isn’t she? She should have grabbed the bill from him and insisted on paying the whole thing plus tip, in exchange for the pure and sacred honor of breathing the same air as him. Good god.

Why make a woman dance around uncomfortably while you wait for her to perform to your liking? TELL your dates upfront it’s dutch or nothing, BEFORE you’ve put her in an awkward position. Jeez, are guys so feeble and utterly incapable of communicating unless it’s to bytch and moan on these forums?
 lacalli
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 120
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:09:10 PM
prefer to have coffee dates at IHOP - its usually not very crowded, and the local police hang out there frequently. The walking trail I normally suggest goes right past the police station, through a playground, past the pool and other

Oh hey, great idea!! Why didn't I come up with that one. Next time the guy suggests coffee I'll offer to pick up the coffees and I'll tell him to meet me in the lobby of the local sheriff station. They have those plastic chairs bolted to the wall that the front desk cop can see from his seat. He can babysit us so I'll feel safe and since I've bought the coffee I won't be the typical gold digger on here who thinks she's entitled to anything beyond a Walmart MacDonald's thereby killing two birds with one stone. Cool.
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 121
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:14:57 PM
Lame -_-. Wal-mart for a date? Come on man step up your game higher than that dude.
 astrosky
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 122
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:17:20 PM

Oh hey, great idea!! Why didn't I come up with that one. Next time the guy suggests coffee I'll offer to pick up the coffees and I'll tell him to meet me in the lobby of the local sheriff station. They have those plastic chairs bolted to the wall that the front desk cop can see from his seat. He can babysit us so I'll feel safe and since I've bought the coffee I won't be the typical gold digger on here who thinks she's entitled to anything beyond a Walmart MacDonald's thereby killing two birds with one stone. Cool.


Don't forget to put it on your profile in the first date section. Just so they can tell the difference between you and the greedy ones who want to lure them behind a Walmart to shoot rats and steal their wallets.
 mainelyhere
Joined: 11/21/2011
Msg: 123
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:26:06 PM
So what i gather is, if a MAN tries to be frugal he is a cheap **stard, but if a woman doesn't want to spend money she is merely frugal?
 astrosky
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 124
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wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 5:30:23 PM

So what i gather is, if a MAN tries to be frugal he is a cheap **stard, but if a woman doesn't want to spend money she is merely frugal?


Why mainely? Why do you keep beating that horse? Its about the Walmart thang. There have been valid pros and cons to it presented. There have been other date suggestions presented. And still you make it about a man parting from his money, and the battle of the sexes. Its about so much more.
 OyVay...
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 125
wtf????
Posted: 2/25/2012 6:02:43 PM
Oh mainely, you just don't get it! Women can continue with all the sarcasm, you are just supposed to wimper and slink off! They are experts at the innuendo and veiled insult, while defending the sisterhood at all costs. Why should you react as you have, because of their jaudiced views and snarky things they say?

post 150 "Of course she wasn't persistent enough and did it wrong, she's a woman isn't she? She should have grabbed the bill from him and insisted on paying the whole thing plus tip, in exchange for the pure and sacred honor of breathing the same air as him."

"Good God.

Whhy make a woman dance around uncomfortably while you wait for her to perform to your liking? TELL your dates up front it's dutch or nothing, BEFORE you've put her in an awkward position. Jeez, are guys so feeble and utterly incapable of communicating unless it's to bytch and moan on these forums?"

See there you go, failure to acknowledge a single thing I said. Mainely you've got to learn about women's entitlements! What's wrong with you? You should be taken out and beaten with a stick!

Don't you realize it's all about them feeling awkward, or angry with men, you don't have a right to "bytch and moan" shut up and pay the bill, after all who do you think you are it's not like you have rights or something!

post 151 "I won't be the typical gold digger on here who thinks she's entitled to anything beyond a walmart mcdonalds"

See, they are just having a little sport, it's never a problem for them to bytch, only when men do it!

post 153 "just so they can tell the difference between you and the greedy ones"

Don't you get it? Mainely I'm surprised, this so they do cover the greedy bytches and embarass you!

post 155 "why do you keep beating that horse. It's about the walmart thing"

Now look, see how far back I had to go to find that these women, don't get, never will, don't want to, and will just keep running the same game on here!

You can't fix stupid, and that would apply to any man who would date women like that!
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