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 AUTHOR
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 143
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?Page 6 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

I'm a very fortunate man. I am a very good provider. There are several men that are in my position that cannot support their children because of the same situation I am in. Government agencies are just not as willing to help men as much as they are willing to help women. Several of my friends have to go to church organizations and beg for food.

It is not lawful here for a man to pay child support when he is the custodial parent. Nor is it lawful anywhere else that I know of. The reason this is happening is because of the sexism taken place in many government offices right now. In reality child support is for children hence the word child in the name. How is the child being supported if money is being taken from the household the child is in and given to the non custodial parents household where the child isn't?


When a woman can go to a government agency and get assistance so easily and she doesn't even pay taxes and I a man who is a tax paying citizen go to the same government agency for assistance and get treated so unfair and unequally there is a serious issue with our government. There are many men who cannot afford an attorney as I have been able to. They can't afford to support the child living in their house plus 20% of their income to pay child support plus a lawyer. Something has to give. Some of the lucky ones where able to find another employer and hide from the attorney general long enough to get a lawyer.

Here's the real kicker to the whole thing. They have acknowledged that as of April 1st of last year I no longer owe child support and have given me credit. At the same time they are still pulling child support from my check and putting it in hold in order to make sure it is all "sorted out". That's right as of April 1st of this year this would of been going on with their knowledge for a whole year. Somehow I bet if I had a high pitched voice and a vagina it would of been fixed in at most a month and I bet a million dollars I wouldn't of had to have a lawyer to do it either. It's wrong and it's not only hurting dad's and the children but the mothers as well. Once they "sort it out" they will decide that the mom owes all kinds of back child support at an interest rate. Then because she has issues of abuse and stipulations that she must be current on child support in order to get supervised visitation. It will affect her relationship and access to the child.

This is just wrong wrong wrong. God Im so frustrated. The entire system is geared towards women and ends up screwing everyone especially the children. Just disgusted with it.


Lord oh mighty! Please do not resolve anything with a automatic rifle! Organization and political activism is the only way.
I'm willing to bet system is designed as population control. Perfect 'divide and conquer' techniques. Fear and intimidation. Subjugation of males as driving force of reproduction.

Are there women left questioning why men don't want relationships or marriage these days?
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 145
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 8:43:12 AM
Msg#151
yes-technically-people can go for permanent sterilization or completely refrain from vaginal sexual intercourse.

For healthy people of childbearing age( and men have been known to father children well past the"3 score and 10" age)
the only 100% certain way to avoid conception is to not have vaginal intercourse.

Permanent sterilization of both participants is probably pretty good odds that conception won't occur-and there are folks who've had a healthy active sex life and managed to avoid conception by diligent use of various forms of non-permanent contraception methods. But accidental/unplanned conception events DO occur. Contraception methods fail or aren't used correctly-or people just get caught up in the moment and don't use contraceptive measures.

In the situation being discussed here-the OP has not given any information that would indicate a clear "bc failure" event. He seems to think that the presence of another male in this woman's life and and a claim of "it ain't mine"-should be considered as birth control?

People can get up on soapboxes or mountaintops and scream that an "unplanned" or "unintended" conception never occurs-but that doesn't make it so. Abortion is NOT "birth control"-there are many many people whose personal code of ethics deems abortion as "murder"...some go so far as to consider even "emergency" contraception like the morning-after pill as an unacceptable solution. I'm not claiming that people with these beliefs are entitled to force them on other people-simply stating that they do exist and cannot be waved aside.

I'm afraid, much as people wish it to be different-the only 100% effective way to prevent conception-for fertile people,or STDS for everyone- is abstinence. Repeating it over and over again " there is no such thing as an unintended conception" will not make it so-whether the repetition occurs in an internet forum or in the middle of Times Square.


There is existing and undeniable choice. To get pregnant or not to get pregnant.


So-OK...which is YOUR plan? Sex with same gender,strictly non-vaginal sex(" I did not have sexual relations with that woman!") with post menopausal women(better get a doctors statement from her) or abstinence?


In capitalist society the major intensive and driving force is finance. You do not buy a house you can not afford. Same concept with children.


So do we make unintended pregnancy a criminal offense? Do we simply refuse to offer any assistance to anybody who has encountered difficulty in supporting their children and hope to hell that family or community will do so? Do we adopt an attitude that finding dead babies in campground dumpsters is just an unfortunate result of social policy?


With another man's newborn baby, she wont even be useful for what she previously was.

What did you say your name was? Richard Head?


Point 1. If I had helped with the pregnancy and its NOT my child, then what? You expect me to lose the money, time, and emotion, on another man's child?


Now- I could take personal insult about that-considering that I had 2 step-grandfathers who spent time, money effort and emotion on my parents-who were other mens' children. But then- they were real men, not overgrown boys.

And what about the men(and women) who've made huge sacrifices to secure freedom and safety for LOTS of other mens' children.


Even if I dont want it to be mine, this man is a biological rival, I am not keen on doing him even the smallest favor at my expense.


I see...then this woman never WAS your friend-she was just a hole to stick your d*ck in.
OP I'm sorry-you are starting to remind me of a banty rooster or a beta male in a pack of feral canids.It's getting VERY difficult to take you seriously, at all. I'm beginning to wonder if you aren't some knd of a troll, making up a topic to get attention.


just paid 7K just to drive on the right hand side of my car, just because. Then there was the new engine, paint, ect. I do spend, for me. Oh, and on March 6, while this girl was giving birth, I was out buying Street Fighter X Tekken, and Mass Effect 3.

Wow-what a prince you are. I can't believe that you are still single and can only manage a FwB involvement.


By the way, I'm doubting whether this woman was ever your friend to begin with. If she was, a decent human being would at least help her with the essentials - whether you were sleeping together or not.

Oh thank Heaven!There ARE some young men who actually have some values!

OP- Even Stevie Wonder can see that you are losing this debate-and the respect of many participants in this thread...including a lot of men.

Never mind giving this child(if it is yours) "good things" like toys and games. Instead, give him or her the opportunity to find a REAL parent- you just make your court-ordered financial contribution. Others have suggested that you give the child love-but I don't think you have the faintest clue about love.

Find out if the child is yours-do what needs to be done to fulfill your legal obligations if it is-protect yourself from being extorted or a victim of paternity fraud. But forget being a "real father"
to the child. It would appear that you can't even manage to grasp the concept of friendship.

I'm really sorry to have to beat you up like this, OP-but I see this as having a faint possibility of being a teachable moment-don't let ME down.
Cindy O
 OOhMeeOhhMy
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 146
view profile
History
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 8:48:02 AM
wow... you are a piece of work.... bet your mama is proud of you.....

Hint... you can have sex without getting someone pregnant.... and since this isn't your first time on the Maury "whose the baby daddy" episode.... one would have thought you would have learned..... wrap your p3nis..... jeez.....

get the test.... hopefully you aren't the baby daddy.... because that would suck.... for the baby.... call the other dude... since it is a financial don't want to do anything for someone else question for you.... maybe he will agree to split the cost....

better yet.... wait until she goes for public assistance.... then they will open a child support case against you if she names you as the father..... then you can go to court and ask them to pay for the test..... and if you are the father.... they can garnish your pay for not having stepped up.....


and she wasn't a friend with benefits.... she was a booty call.... because no one treats a friend the way you have treated her.....
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 147
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 9:42:08 AM
People can get up on soapboxes or mountaintops and scream that an "unplanned" or "unintended" conception never occurs-but that doesn't make it so. Abortion is NOT "birth control"-there are many many people whose personal code of ethics deems abortion as "murder"...some go so far as to consider even "emergency" contraception like the morning-after pill as an unacceptable solution. I'm not claiming that people with these beliefs are entitled to force them on other people-simply stating that they do exist and cannot be waved aside.

"unplanned" or "unintended" conception does NOT occur. There is always a choice of having sperm in vagina without any birth control. People with religious believes or personal code of ethics have a choice of abstinence, sex with same gender or none-vaginal sex.

So do we make unintended pregnancy a criminal offense? Do we simply refuse to offer any assistance to anybody who has encountered difficulty in supporting their children and hope to hell that family or community will do so? Do we adopt an attitude that finding dead babies in campground dumpsters is just an unfortunate result of social policy?
Nothing so dramatic. I believe I've mentioned a simple solution already. Taking away the incentive to have a child without appropriate financial support and/or consent of both parents. To create incentive to have a baby, a cherished treasure and not an accident, a **stard or burden. Incentive to form and maintain a wholesome family. I'm so sorry for your distorted foresight and limited fate in humanity.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 148
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 9:55:55 AM

…hope you warn any woman you may have sex with that even if you are married to her, you're going to have any resulting child DNA tested. Wow.


He should warn them that he’s a sociopath, and most likely, a troll.


Even if I dont want it to be mine, this man is a biological rival, I am not keen on doing him even the smallest favor at my expense.


‘Biological rival’? ‘Keen’? Really?

Anyway, it doesn’t matter if any future ‘wife’ he has gets pregnant…under the law if they are married, he is responsible. It’s called the best interest of the child and it’s what adults consider more important than an Xbox.

I’ll quit feeding it now.
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 149
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 10:00:00 AM
I'm thinking this punk-ass is either a bored little troll, or a complete douche nozzle who needs a Goodsfellows beating to help give his selfish, arrogant ass some perspective.

In either event, I hope he gets the Goodfellows beating.

And that we get to see it on YouTube.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 150
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 10:28:23 AM

There is always a choice of having sperm in vagina without any birth control. People with religious believes or personal code of ethics have a choice of abstinence, sex with same gender or none-vaginal sex.

that's fine with me-now how do we go about enforcing that? Of course, we could always have the government step in and take possession of children born out of lawful wedlock-and make the taxpayers pony up to run facilities to care for these children. That would certainly take away any financial incentives to those nasty single mothers.

Hey- if we go back to where a man either has to pay a whore or get married in order to have sex-I don't guess it would be any skin off my nose. Much as I would hate it-if our society chooses to legislate against pre-or extra-marital sex, I suppose I could cope.

Anyway-this is all academic at this point-whether the 2 creators of the baby under discussion here were just stupid, or the pregnancy was a deliberate ploy by the woman to get on the child support/public assistance gravy train-what's done is done.

Would the men who are perfectly willing to forego having sex except within a legal marriage-and when they WANT TO be fathers- please signify by saying "Aye?"

Crickets....
Cindy O
 lovefun99
Joined: 6/14/2010
Msg: 151
view profile
History
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 11:01:53 AM
Oye vato! que macho!

You make me sick, I saw the same attitude with many village/street mexicans I knew when I lived in Mexico. I sincerly hope that the baby is not yours and that you don't further pollute the gene pool by reproducing.

Funny that you called her a "friend" with benefits....sounds like she was just your dumpster and not really a friend at all.
 Goldentyga117
Joined: 6/25/2011
Msg: 152
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 12:01:25 PM
What so now he has to care about someone who he was just having sex with ? Nah i don't think so. That's what being a friend with benefits is...you meet up you **** and you go home. If i were in his situation i also wouldn't give her any money or help out with the pregnancy before knowing who the father was. People keep forgetting to mention that she had NINE MONTHS to figure out who it was. I'm pretty sure you can still test for DNA during the pregnancy.

I'm a little shocked that almost no one has said that she has to take responsibility for her actions. "rawrrrrr it's all the guys fault not the womans" sorry but last i checked SHE could have used SOME form of contraceptive but obviously didn't. She also could have said told him not to get off inside her but she didn't. Why is she blameless ? i find that to be absurdly BS.

I also love how people are so immature that they're proposing that the OP get beaten and that he should never have kids. those people can just stfu because really ? what kind of POS people are you to be WANTING someone you don't know to get beat up because he doesn't want to take care of a baby that's potentially not his. Psychos.

Everyone also ignores the fact that he keeps saying that if it's his he'll step up. Are you all retarded or do you just fail at reading comprehension ? He doesn't want to pay for or take care of another mans child which is a valid argument...she's had over NINE MONTHS to figure out who the father was and apparently hasn't cared that much to do it....so HE'S going about taking a test to see what happens and if it's his he'll do what needs to be done....WTF is wrong with you people ? obviously no matter what he says you either can't understand it or you're not satisfied because you just choose to cherry pick all the parts you decide you don't like.
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 153
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 12:09:33 PM
enforcing... nasty single mothers... pay a whore... forego having sex...

You have a flair for the dramatic, skillful misdirection and ignoring points. Well done.
Unfortunately no matter what you try to do single parents will remain. Not everyone are made to be perfect mommies and daddies, husbands and wifes. Public assistance should remain and no sane parent will refuse to support own child regardless of family status. Still child support enforcement should be adjusted to be unbiased and equal and not a source of disputes. We're not discussing position of the toilet seat here now are we?
I do agree, it is all academic but men can dream

As for the impregnator here, he needs to start shopping for a good lawyer.


I'm no doctor, but I believe there are some risks associated with establishing paternity in utero. It's probably best to wait until after the child is born.

Fetal cell test is none-invasive and safe
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 154
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 12:22:22 PM
What so now he has to care about someone who he was just having sex with ? Nah i don't think so. That's what being a friend with benefits is...you meet up you **** and you go home.


I don't know about you, but I care about my friends and would try to help them when they are in need. Unless the "F" in FWB is purely rhetorical.


If i were in his situation i also wouldn't give her any money or help out with the pregnancy before knowing who the father was. People keep forgetting to mention that she had NINE MONTHS to figure out who it was. I'm pretty sure you can still test for DNA during the pregnancy.


I'm no doctor, but I believe there are some risks associated with establishing paternity in utero. It's probably best to wait until after the child is born.


I'm a little shocked that almost no one has said that she has to take responsibility for her actions. "rawrrrrr it's all the guys fault not the womans" sorry but last i checked SHE could have used SOME form of contraceptive but obviously didn't. She also could have said told him not to get off inside her but she didn't. Why is she blameless ? i find that to be absurdly BS.


It's not really about assigning blame, it's about what a standup guy would do.

If the woman is smart, she would save all her receipts for out of pocket expenses and file suit after paternity is established.

Everyone also ignores the fact that he keeps saying that if it's his he'll step up. Are you all retarded or do you just fail at reading comprehension ? He doesn't want to pay for or take care of another mans child which is a valid argument...she's had over NINE MONTHS to figure out who the father was and apparently hasn't cared that much to do it....so HE'S going about taking a test to see what happens and if it's his he'll do what needs to be done....WTF is wrong with you people ? obviously no matter what he says you either can't understand it or you're not satisfied because you just choose to cherry pick all the parts you decide you don't like.


I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens when the results are in, although I suspect we'll never know...
 1ukn4u
Joined: 10/30/2010
Msg: 156
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 12:58:26 PM

Point 1. If I had helped with the pregnancy and its NOT my child, then what? You expect me to lose the money, time, and emotion, on another man's child?



On one end of this I can see it if he had no idea she was sleeping with others. Believe me I think the OP is scum. However she was dumb enough to have sex with him. She also had sex with others and created the freaking baby loto. So her and the OP were made for each other. Poor baby. :(



Lord oh mighty! Please do not resolve anything with a automatic rifle! Organization and political activism is the only way.
I'm willing to bet system is designed as population control. Perfect 'divide and conquer' techniques. Fear and intimidation. Subjugation of males as driving force of reproduction.

Are there women left questioning why men don't want relationships or marriage these days?


I'm not going to go crazy. It's not about the money for me but for other dad's it might be. I'm fine and pretty well off. However the mom of my child is currently in need of help and because of this I can't afford to help her as much as I would like to. Actually me and the mom have even gone together to the child support office together and still I am being treated this way. I could understand if I had run from my responsibilities or something. I didn't though. They called I came and signed up no problem. Why would undoing what was easily done so hard? The system itself is a joke. They are simply taking the money and putting it in hold. I now have thousands of dollars just sitting there. Stupid is as stupid does.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 157
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 12:59:25 PM
Am I also a troll, for believing that 'real' men havent existed in a generation or two? People tell their children to run away and tell at the first sign of trouble. What happened to taking care of yours? I defintely dont think men used to raise or help with other men's kids.

In the end, we are here for procreation. If you are a man without a kid, and taking care of someone else's kid, you are NOT a man. I guess actually saying that makes me a troll as well. If you think that, look at nature. Aminals arent PC, and they drive the last males offspring away or even kill them. Not that I want to go that far, just would rather not deal with it in the first place.


Fortunately, real men don't care what you think makes a real man.

FWIW, men also used to hold slaves. I'm not sure I'd hold them up as shining examples of humanity. Nor would I cite what animals do, last I checked we humans liked to think we were held to a slightly higher standard.
 lovefun99
Joined: 6/14/2010
Msg: 158
view profile
History
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 1:03:21 PM

If you are a man without a kid, and taking care of someone else's kid, you are NOT a man


So my stepfather was not a man becuase he married my mother after my father died and raised my sister and I as his own???

So men that adopt children/ have foster children becuse they cannot have their own are also not men?
These men are more man than you will ever be.

So in your world all orphaned/abandoned children should not ever have fathers?
And all single mothers should forever remain single and raise their children without fathers?

That's some seriously f'd up thinking dude.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 159
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 2:00:00 PM

Unfortunately no matter what you try to do single parents will remain. Not everyone are made to be perfect mommies and daddies, husbands and wifes. Public assistance should remain and no sane parent will refuse to support own child regardless of family status.


Thank you for making my point for me. Not that I really needed the help...LOL.


Still child support enforcement should be adjusted to be unbiased and equal and not a source of disputes. We're not discussing position of the toilet seat here now are we?


I dunno-position of the toilet seat was never an issue for me. I learned as a child to look behind me before I sat down. And I will admit that I am quite a few years out of the field of work where I was in touch with child support issues...so I have no way of knowing whether CS is or isn't unbiased and equal in your jurisdiction. However, it's been my experience with human nature that often questions of "unbiased and equal"-regardless of context-often boil down to whose ox is getting gored.


As for the impregnator here, he needs to start shopping for a good lawyer.


Which is something I and others have already pointed out. Much as I might regard it as poetic justice in some cases, it is certainly not my wish to see someone be a victim of paternity fraud.


Fetal cell test is none-invasive and safe


Are you a health professional in the OB-GYN field? And is this test more costly than postpartum DNA paternity testing?


I'm a little shocked that almost no one has said that she has to take responsibility for her actions. "rawrrrrr it's all the guys fault not the womans"


Nobody here is canonizing the woman-just because we have not heaped vitriol and vilification upon her head doesn't mean we hold her blameless. But it's the possible father that's here screaming in fear that his wallet may be assaulted by a baby.


Everyone also ignores the fact that he keeps saying that if it's his he'll step up. Are you all retarded or do you just fail at reading comprehension

Oh no-we caught that. It's just that the OP doesn't seem to know when to shut up.


Everyone also ignores the fact that he keeps saying that if it's his he'll step up. Are you all retarded or do you just fail at reading comprehension

If we don't hear different, I'm going to pres[ume that the OP IS the father. I think that if he is cleared of the paternity question, that he will be falling over himself to let us know.


love how the troll card gets pulled when someone doesnt agree with concensus.


No, the troll card gets pulled when there is reason to believe there is a troll present.


Am I also a troll, for believing that 'real' men havent existed in a generation or two?


Well, you certainly are trying to prove that belief, aren't you? Fortunately-many of us see enough examples of real men every day, to not worry too much about a renegade penis on a dating site.


If you are a man without a kid, and taking care of someone else's kid, you are NOT a man.


Well, sir, I thank you kindly for the insult to both of my stepgrandfathers, several relatives, and any number of friends. I happen to have a neice who married a man with custody of his 2 little boys- does that make her not a real woman?


Get out of here with that shit.

it's a discussion forum and all participants are entitled to express their opinions.


It is HER afterall, that put us in a precarious situation in the first place.

what-she caused an evil spirit to possess your penis? Do tell!


Stand up guys are the ones getting used by women, they are the ones complaining about not being able to get sex. They are the human equivalent of the birds used by Cuckoo's to hatch their eggs.


Son-did anyone ever make you aware that the best thing to do when you find yourself in a hole is to STOP DIGGING?


However she was dumb enough to have sex with him.


Believe me, nobody here is looking to exonerate the woman. But now there is a newborn child in the mix. I personally think that the State should take custody of the child but unfortunately that can't happen unless she is proven an unfit parent-or she takes advantage of any "safe haven" laws in her jurisdiction.


They are simply taking the money and putting it in hold. I now have thousands of dollars just sitting there. Stupid is as stupid does.

A
ctually-(it's too complicated to explain here and I'm not sure every state has the same system) I can kind of understand what MAY be happening. Have YOU consulted an attorney? He or she would be better able to advise you. Trust me-the State is first and foremost protecing its' own treasury-and that's not as "off" as it might seem, seeing as how that money came from the wallets of taxpayers.


Nor would I cite what animals do, last I checked we humans liked to think we were held to a slightly higher standard.

And with domestic animals- we take specimens that we don't want to be reproducing, and sterilize them.

Cindy O
 Arata_na_Yoake
Joined: 1/25/2012
Msg: 160
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 2:31:32 PM
@ Tsubame; there is nothing I can do about what was missed. Best course of action is to move forward. It is HER afterall, that put us in a precarious situation in the first place.


So your response to your lack of responsibility (if it's yours) in regards to another life is "oops spilled milk"? By all means have sex with all the women who'll let you, but for the good of the human race I recommend you get a vasectomy and avoid reproduction. I'm only 23 and I'm already getting annoyed with having to offset the inadequacies of people like you.

By the way, as I already said I don't have a good opinion of said mother so you can stop trying to spread the blame. She's equally irresponsible and if she's as bipolar as you've said then I truly pity that child. Unless it finds a good foster home I sadly feel it was better off getting aborted than having to face the misery I'm sure is waiting in its future.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 162
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 2:40:12 PM
Go on Maury.It's the only way to be sure.




I vote for this.

P.s. I created a board about requiring licencing to have children; via reverseable vasectomy, or mandatory adoption for those who have kids without meeting licence requirements. Have too many without your licence, and it's mandatory vasectomy/tubes tied.

It was deleted as innapropriate.

Seriously; it very much is "not" an innapropriate idea.

 0ldhag
Joined: 1/8/2012
Msg: 163
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 2:42:37 PM
which is lies because she wanted me.


you have major problems and it has nothing to do with an illegitimate child...

_____________________________________________
 Arata_na_Yoake
Joined: 1/25/2012
Msg: 164
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 2:49:48 PM
I think by default guys should receive a vasectomy once they hit puberty and they can't get it reversed until they prove they can be a responsible parent (clean record, stable job, etc). Think of all the money we'd save on teenage pregnancies, welfare, food stamps, birth control, etc.
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 166
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 3:03:31 PM
I will admit that I am quite a few years out of the field of work where I was in touch with child support issues...so I have no way of knowing whether CS is or isn't unbiased and equal in your jurisdiction.

From what 1ukn4u and other men are saying it's enough to scare any boy sterile. From what I understand it is very rare for fathers to get child support while having custody but I never hear them complain because they LOVE their kids.


Are you a health professional in the OB-GYN field? And is this test more costly than postpartum DNA paternity testing?
I'm a GOOGLE professional :) Cell test is expensive (around $1300) but I guess you got to pay for safety.


I'm not going to go crazy.
Never said you ware man. Just empathizing.


I think by default guys should receive a vasectomy once they hit puberty and they can't get it reversed until they prove they can be a responsible parent (clean record, stable job, etc). Think of all the money we'd save on teenage pregnancies, welfare, food stamps, birth control, etc.

Now that's insane. Even RISUG is safer and less invasive and there are other options
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 167
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 3:11:28 PM

If you are a man without a kid, and taking care of someone else's kid, you are NOT a man.


What a load of garbage. If YOU dont want to care for another mans kids, whatever. But to make such a blanket, ignorant statement is just plain stupid. So all the Step-Fathers & Adoptive Fathers out there are not "real men". I say they are more men than guys who go get random skanky chicks knocked up then dont want to get off their lazy rear & get a DNA test & stand up for a child that may be theirs.

As far this biological rival garbage? GTFO with that. YOU are a grown, adult, human male. NOT an animal in the wild. WHY would you use animal behavior as an excuse for your choices? Are you bnot part of the evolved human species that is capable of higher thought than a feral animal?

And how the kids looks is not really an indicator. My son really did not look anything like me in his early years, but once he hit around 5 i started noticing resemblances.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 168
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 3:12:20 PM
There is no way i would have an amnio procedure done.

It is VERY invasive, painful, & carries risk to the fetus.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 169
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 3:15:11 PM

Yes where initially both parents agreed to have children


My eldest child was unplanned, & my youngest child was VERY planned.
So if i, for some odd reason, God Forbid, hit a situation that put me in poverty, you would advocate that only one of my children deserved to be fed, & the other should starve?
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 170
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 3:31:38 PM
You would not have your first child if you knew you would not be able to feed him.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 171
So, she had a kid, have I done enough?
Posted: 3/22/2012 4:06:35 PM

You would not have your first child if you knew you would not be able to feed him


I was very fortunate that i was able to choose to carry my first child to term, knowing i could & would love & provide for her. But if i was ever hit with a situation that impacted by ability to feed my children, which i hope to God i never do, would you really be saying "well the first was one unplanned so she goes hungry, the second one was planned so he gets help"????????!!!!!!!!!!!
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