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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Is "taking things slow" really necessary after the age of 45???      Home login  
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 gregdad49
Joined: 11/20/2008
Msg: 55
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Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???Page 7 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
Love takes time, but it builds with being friends first.
 casandra67
Joined: 1/26/2008
Msg: 56
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/4/2012 7:28:00 AM
I agree with import from uk

Being older makes me hopefully smarter and take a good look before I jump.
 munnymaker2012
Joined: 1/29/2012
Msg: 57
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/4/2012 3:41:05 PM
i like to take things fast ...FAST FAST FAST

LET'S GOooooooooooooo

;)
 Discerning Virtuosa
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 58
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/7/2012 9:37:09 PM
At this age I think it is even more necessary. Sure virginity is long gone, but my heart needs protection even more now. I consider every man like a good book that I want to read from cover to cover, since it's truly a mans mind that attracts me the most. Quality is better than quantity.
 WesternRose
Joined: 1/2/2011
Msg: 59
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Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/24/2012 10:39:30 PM
I could not agree with you more. The entire process of forming a relationship takes a great deal of time. I am too old to do the fools rush in thing. I'm true to me first and me says that I won't step into anything just for the sake of stepping.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 60
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Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/25/2012 11:26:25 AM

TkngLifeSlow11:
Someone mentioned that players pretend. Indeed they do. People can put on a facade for several months, and completely pretend to be what you are looking for (they can mimic what you want to appear perfect for you).


Let me see if I understand what you are saying. You think a man, who is a player, is going to come along and seduce you. He is going to wear a façade, a complete false front, for a period of months. Take you out on many, many dates, spend money on you, spent potentially hundreds of hours in your company, all so that he can get in your pants one time, and then dump you? You REALLY believe this?

Let me ask you a question. Why wouldn’t he just go to a prostitute? Wouldn’t it be much cheaper and easier? Couldn’t he pick out a woman who was ever more desirable than you?

In summation, let me just ask you this – Do you really think what you are sitting on is that valuable and that unique?
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 61
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/25/2012 12:43:27 PM

Does being 45 mean that if you're not part of a couple then you don't exist?


Damn! Really??! If I don't exist, then how, pray tell, do I manage to be such a complete and utter pain in the ass? Can you imagine how bad it would be if I had someone to encourage me? Y'all better pray that I continue to believe in taking it at a pace I deem wise and appropriate to the situation at hand.


I'd like to think that by 45+ you know enough to not have some silly "timeframe" (like the "sex by the 3rd date or its going nowhere" rule [/qote]
I don't think it's so much about having set-in-stone benchmarks, but I do believe that many 45+ people of both genders weigh their actions before standing on the accelerator.


You think a man, who is a player, is going to come along and seduce you. He is going to wear a façade, a complete false front, for a period of months. Take you out on many, many dates, spend money on you, spent potentially hundreds of hours in your company, all so that he can get in your pants one time, and then dump you?


ohenryx, while I do absolutely GET where you are coming from, there is a type out there who is very into the "challenge/conquest" aspect of dating. Some of them, I really don't think they KNOW-they just experience a "let-down" and lose interest after "conquering". Others, I'm sure, know exactly what they are doing. Whether it is an intentional "conquest game" or a situation where the guy just loses interest, it can be quite aggravating to those who've perhaps become overly invested too quickly.

However, I think we all need to remind ourselves that this thread was started by a woman, and perhaps she has never encountered a "player" or a "conquest addict". It sounds like she is encountering MEN,who, for whatever reason, are not interested in rushing into a full-bore "serious relationship"-and, sometimes the reason(s) ARE valid in the mans' perspective.
Cindy O
 mjinict
Joined: 8/13/2008
Msg: 62
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Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/25/2012 9:17:56 PM
Let me ask you a question. Why wouldn’t he just go to a prostitute? Wouldn’t it be much cheaper and easier?
-----------
Maybe some men would prefer a normal woman over a prostitute, yuk! And they don't always spend a lot to date one.
 Helloitsmeyourlookingfor
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 63
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/26/2012 9:53:50 AM
Wow... since when did taking things slow or not equate to a road leading to marriage??? I guess I am sitting at a perpetual red light, because marriage is not going to happen again. I am more than willing to grow old with my partner, but I will never be called a husband again.

I disagree that it takes a long time to get to know someone. It may take a long time to get someone to open up (which in my mind is when you get to know them) but to those of us that are open from the get go and wear our heart on our sleeves, don't hide behind the truth of who we are..... you will get to know me immediately. Take what you like and leave the rest.

Life is way too short for me to wait around for one to open up "to see" if I like what I am dealing with.
 Thornz2000
Joined: 1/2/2012
Msg: 64
Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 4/27/2012 5:47:50 PM
I guess it really depends on the people dating on the speed they are comfortable with going.
 meetme28269
Joined: 4/11/2011
Msg: 65
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Is taking things slow really necessary after the age of 45???
Posted: 5/4/2012 6:47:12 AM
Our society has changed since we have been in High school and our societies view on dating has also changed.
Our personal views on dating and expectations have also changed,that is if we are in touch with reality.
I'm not saying you should jump right into the bed,but surely you have learned some life lessons by now.
Most important is to be comfortable with your actions and to strive for happiness.
Life is too short to believe otherwise.
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