Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Coworker drama      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 sexandthepof
Joined: 10/10/2011
Msg: 25
Coworker dramaPage 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Your subject line shows that you have acknowledged about this girl. Why do you still like to get involved with her? You like drama girl, don't you? Most of the time, girls who want to vent about their fianc├ęs at some points, sooner or later, will go back to them.

Getting involved romantically with a coworker usually causes one of the two will have to leave the workplace, not to mention gossiping.
 ApresMois
Joined: 5/4/2012
Msg: 26
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/12/2012 10:53:17 PM
ya, guys do this too... got me one of these.
 jmark4
Joined: 7/3/2011
Msg: 27
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/12/2012 11:36:53 PM
and why is this your business? How are you being a good friend? You have a crush on an engaged woman and you are getting involved; no less at work which is a totally crazy thing to do.

Funny how she's still with him.

Again, you are not being a good friend. If you were a good friend you'd tell her to talk to him. How is talking to you going to help their relationship? If you really are a friend, you'd tell her to tell him and you stay out of it.
 ThreadMasterB
Joined: 4/15/2012
Msg: 28
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/13/2012 4:13:35 AM

I will never get guys like you who want to play the hero for your own selfish reasons, I really don't need to play therapist, counsellor, legal adviser, loan officer, debt manager, psychiatrist, AA sponsor, tissue holder, or babysitter to someone who hasn't resolved their problems, issues, or relationships.


This right here, I don't get the urge for people want to be a life coach for people.
 TerrieLynnC
Joined: 5/31/2011
Msg: 29
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/14/2012 3:59:48 PM
OP Your attempting to be the "knight in shining armor" ..........IT WON'T WORK..............
Your best bet is to stay out of it.............ever heard the saying "don't shit where you eat"
 deletedpost
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 30
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/14/2012 4:09:52 PM
Leave it alone


........................
 windchymes
Joined: 11/29/2008
Msg: 31
view profile
History
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/14/2012 4:10:59 PM
Don't call or text her. Don't answer the phone if she's calling and don't reply to her texts. Be busy if she asks you to go on break with her. If you find yourself alone with her, and you should be avoiding that whenever possible, she starts talking about the boyfriend, change the subject. If she asks you to meet her somewhere after work to talk, say you already have plans. Just don't be around. If you must share close quarters in the actual work area, just be all business-like, don't socialize.

All talk about the fiance is taboo. Stick your fingers in your ears and say "la la la la la la la' if you have to.
 surfaceofficer
Joined: 8/8/2011
Msg: 32
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/14/2012 4:12:18 PM
Jason...what quandary in keeping a strictly professional relationship are you experiencing? Now that you've made a decision not to passively covet her...what is the issue you are finding with doing that?
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 33
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/14/2012 4:51:20 PM
You don't want to switch gears because you are attracted to her
and lonely.
Tis human nature to be that way.
You are smitten.
So will do what you are gonna do.

I empathize ahead of time with the future pain that
course will bring you.

At least when it comes......learn from it.
and maybe the next girl you are smitten with will be better.
 Jason31
Joined: 1/8/2005
Msg: 34
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/15/2012 8:20:39 AM
The problem is its going on 3 months ive been one way trying to help and being there, just having fun with her thinking that showing theres good guys out there as my only objective but now that i know i need to fade off into just a coworker it seems hard to do so in a blink of a eye. I just need to know the easiest way to do so and keep the peace between us since we work together? I cant just walk in a different person day to day
 BornVillan
Joined: 3/26/2012
Msg: 35
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/15/2012 8:22:16 AM
Get it while the gettins good !!!! dont pass it up
 theforumfiend
Joined: 10/21/2007
Msg: 36
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/16/2012 2:10:05 PM
You simply tell this woman that as her friend you've pretty much done all you can do to help her and start spending less time with her.
 BlokeInSydney
Joined: 5/7/2012
Msg: 37
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/16/2012 11:36:49 PM

My question is should I keep being the good friend (knowing I will start falling for her cuz Im attracted to a woman who needs to be treated right),


Sorry, that bit there kind of made me want to vomit. What does that mean?

Does it mean you're looking to take advantage of the fact this woman is having relationship troubles and confiding in you? If it does, that would make you a bit of a weasel, don't you think?

Just fade away mate, just be a co-worker and nothing more. Surely she has an army of girlfriends (Who aren't co-workers) to help her through this?
 RunningFool7
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 38
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 12:06:55 AM
She comes to you because you offer an open set of ears. You really think she's into you? I mean she might be...but not for what you're hoping for. Think about it...

You should keep being the good ... coworker.
 PointingWestAV
Joined: 5/9/2012
Msg: 39
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 1:23:33 AM
I just can't resist anymore.

You know what the funniest part of this entire thread is? (Please don't get me wrong, I'm NOT making light of the OP's situation)...

It's the fact that a bunch of people on a dating website, most looking for that "special someone", are giving dating advice! LMFAO

Call me nuts, as I might be the only one who sees this, but doesn't that strike you as, oh, I dunno... OXYMORONIC? hahaha

It would seem to me that this would be the LAST location one would go for information on these topics, despite the superficial appearance that gives the illusion of logical choice. People that don't have it figured out getting relationship advice from people that, well, don't have it figured out! :D

(To that one person that has a snappy comeback to all this: Oh really? Why are you here then?)

Sorry, I just find that rather amusing. I digress...
 PointingWestAV
Joined: 5/9/2012
Msg: 40
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 2:58:26 AM
Odd thing is, I pretty much agree with the consensus here.

The whole rescue thing is begging for trouble. In my experiences, it typically involves the female working the two males against each other until she gets far enough up out of whatever hole she's in, and then dumps both. Got the T-Shirt on that one for sure. :/

I guess then with that being said, if I'm here and gonna put in my two cents anyway, it would be "Run, Forrest! Run!"

The irony however still sticks with me on this... Shrug.
 surfaceofficer
Joined: 8/8/2011
Msg: 41
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 1:20:50 PM
It's the fact that a bunch of people on a dating website, most looking for that "special someone", are giving dating advice! LMFAO

Call me nuts, as I might be the only one who sees this, but doesn't that strike you as, oh, I dunno... OXYMORONIC? hahaha


Fine, you're nuts (as anyone who saw you "laughing your as$ off while surfing this site probably gathered).

Secondly...this topic is not one on dating but 'morality'. If dating were the only issue (i.e. one single woman in the same geographic location vs. one single man in the same geographic location), than the advice would be simple: go get it.

Before you bring yourself to spit on the ladies and gentleman who have followed this topic since its creation...you may want to consider a few things:

A. The OP asked for help through opinion...the people here are providing just that.

B. You are KINDA no better than anyone else here.

C. Some of us aren't even here to date...but for the forums.

D. If you aren't looking to be the very imbodiment of what you criticize...why are you on the forums at all?



Any questions asked were purely rhetorical. A response isn't necessary. Happy tidings.
 PointingWestAV
Joined: 5/9/2012
Msg: 42
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 4:33:54 PM

that one person that has a snappy comeback to all this


...


Before you bring yourself to spit on the ladies and gentleman who have followed this topic since its creation...you may want to consider a few things:


And there it is... Ladies and Gentlemen, your "expert".
 Rob3444
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 43
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/17/2012 6:27:55 PM
It's the fact that a bunch of people on a dating website, most looking for that "special someone", are giving dating advice! LMFAO


I don't get what you're laughing at. I use to be on a boat forum where a bunch of guys repairing boats and motors would help each other out. Makes sense to me.

The fact that we are all daters makes us very interested in the topic so who better to talk to? Can you give an example?
Should we ask our questions on a married for 30 years forum?
I have learned a great deal on the forums about human nature and relationship dynamics.

_______________________________________________________________

As for my opinion on this matter to the OP: I have rescued a few in my time (never if involved with another man) it always turned out bad and to be honest I only rescued the younger good looking ones. I know why I did it and hope to never do it again.
 Jason31
Joined: 1/8/2005
Msg: 44
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/29/2012 3:10:05 PM
Thanks for your advice..But I think I'm going to regret trying to be with her as much as trying to stay away. I have no brakes and as much as I know I have to keep things professional, I cant just turn. Its been 3 months now...just call me steak cuz Im cooked. I know Im what she needs, and the fact that I can be myself with her and consider her a best friend isnt helping
 Blackout478
Joined: 5/1/2011
Msg: 45
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/29/2012 5:18:04 PM
This will lead right into you falling for her and then guess what will happen? You will get that phone call or text saying she wants to work things out with her fiance. All you will be is a rebound and once he cleans up his act your gone! Also, your getting one side of the story, for all you know he drinks, because she is a cheating, nagging wrench(not saying she is but). I'd fall back unless you want to be the one left in the dust and confiding in friends on how she went back to her fiance.
 onehappyfellow
Joined: 9/21/2008
Msg: 46
view profile
History
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/29/2012 5:43:43 PM
I was in a similar situation (not identical) and got her hooked up with a professional counselor

best you not get entangled.
 Jason31
Joined: 1/8/2005
Msg: 47
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/30/2012 2:33:59 AM
Update, last night she dumped the +++####.!!!! he started pushing her 1 year old. hope he gets what he deserves!!! i might not get to be with her, but im staying friends and see what happens..A-men thank you Lord that see seen the light!
 Archangel_07
Joined: 6/21/2010
Msg: 48
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/30/2012 5:11:59 AM
OP she's still going to need healing time. My advice to you is keep business separate from person cuz the 2 don't mix. You're better off find another lady that wants to be with you, instead of just giving her an ear to listen to. There's more to a relationship than being a listening therapist.
 christyis4real
Joined: 7/6/2011
Msg: 49
Coworker drama
Posted: 5/30/2012 7:33:13 AM
Leave her alone! Well, unless you want to be a part of her drama world ;)
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Coworker drama