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 babyfiireflii
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 37
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
well its kind of an odd question, kind of like "she doesnt have to why do i?" ... :| im not sure why you feel the need to get even or to compete like that with a female. sounds like a child to me.
im a welder an apprentice for a union even and believe you me i dont get easier work, it all needs to just get done and those who complain about it are the ones who get told told to man up. but thats only in my experience. ive manned up major, but it appears to emasculate men when i do, so damned if you damned if you dont right. you decide the standards of your life and what makes you a man and stick to it.
ppl suck sometimes
 babyfiireflii
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 38
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/14/2012 4:46:29 PM
perhaps when it comes to dating, which really isnt vital for survival, it would have been a wholelot easier for ME to be a man doing the work i do, there is no complaint i just know thats how it is. i guess what i was trying to get across is being a "man about it" doesnt mean literally those words are used as a term now, and woman can 'man up' everyone has a choice to do that, or complain.
 Anywherbuthere
Joined: 12/30/2011
Msg: 39
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/14/2012 6:11:23 PM
I was actually going to respond to your inquiry until I read your profile...see below.
"Also, I really hate, despise, loathe gender roles with a huge passion, especially how life, society, culture, as to what they say is masculine or feminine, they expect us guys to be a certain way attitude-wise, mentally-wise, etc. "

Aww what the heck...To man up? Seek and find answers within yourself...blame and accuse no one...for you and only you are held accountable by you for that which you have either allowed, built or destroyed. Unless you don't hold yourself accountable.
 Janet_Always
Joined: 6/20/2012
Msg: 40
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/15/2012 5:52:01 AM
Usually I think people mean you need to grow up and act like a mature adult rather than a little boy.

I have my own ideas about how I classify a "real man" which I know is really just my "preferred type" and has no bearing on someone's gender.

But when anyone has such a hatred towards some societal viewpoints they tend to be whiny and lack maturity.

It's not necessary to agree with others to live your life.
 myownjourney
Joined: 7/11/2012
Msg: 41
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/17/2012 2:25:31 PM
I truly wish every woman who says they want a real man (or thinks they are somehow fit to judge what, exactly, that is) would find one--the sooner, the better. Then, maybe they'd erase the term, "real man," from their vocabulary; and thus, stop annoying the ever loving hell out of all us artificial guys who are sick to death of hearing it.
 vestaceres
Joined: 6/13/2012
Msg: 42
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/17/2012 2:45:47 PM
Yes - my womanhood is constantly accosted through the media and even on dating sites, not personally, but I don't fit the criteria of being woman that society expects me to be: insanely slender to the point I am near anorexia; somehow, I am supposed to restore myself to 25 years old either by insane surgeries, cosmetics, and excessive clothing I would have given up paying my education for or the insane guilt I should feel being born in the wrong year every year after 28; being childless or not; having the right color, length; nails, but I have gorgeous, natural nails; should have already finished a graduate degree before 30; or just give up because 39 is somehow the new 50.

It doesn't matter that I'm well educated, empathetic, intelligent, teaches, pretty and curvy, a brunette, a woman who isn't jealous of women not yet in their majority; that I stand my ground; a woman who doesn't want to look 25; doesn't treat men like manuer; relate well to others; solves problems; and notwithstanding the fact that I am independent in the true sense of the world and still believes in quality relationships and is amazing lover.

Cheers.
 shomesomethin
Joined: 5/4/2007
Msg: 43
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/19/2012 5:24:30 AM
If it must be explained, then you probably won't understand anyway.
Set aside the ways of a child. There are very few men in this country today. Most are children in adult bodies.
Don't worry about what anyone else thinks about you except for your parents and your children, if you have any.
If you are with a woman who thinks she needs to tell you to man up or grow a pair, then you are with a woman who has no respect for you in the first place, so dump the b***h.
 Janet_Always
Joined: 6/20/2012
Msg: 44
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/19/2012 5:39:07 AM

I truly wish every woman who says they want a real man (or thinks they are somehow fit to judge what, exactly, that is) would find one--the sooner, the better. Then, maybe they'd erase the term, "real man," from their vocabulary; and thus, stop annoying the ever loving hell out of all us artificial guys who are sick to death of hearing it.

It seems odd to me that you would just naturally assume you're not a real man. Why not?
 Capn_America
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 45
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/20/2012 1:50:50 PM

seriously, i'm willing to risk getting arrested, but the next time someone tells me in person to "Man Up, Be a Man, Grow a Pair", i seriously would love to beat the shit out of him, kick his ass, fight him, to prove that i have balls, that i am a Man, that i have respect for myself, love to make him squeal as I break his ****in' neck!


Man up, grow a pair and be a man.
Now come to Montreal and try to break MY neck, junior....
I've seen a couple of you replies, if your so peed off at women in general and how its so unfair that men are held to supposedly such higher standards than women, your very welcome to turn gay.
And if you hate men as well, like seems to be the case with the above post, your very welcomed to jump off a bridge.
If that the only way you feel you can prove to someone your actually a man, you have a HELLUVA way to grow.

Instead, the next time someone tells you to grow a pair, try wondering exactly why he's saying that, and giving that person the benefit of a doubt. If you were told that so often in YOUR life, there might be something to it that you've been stubbornly refusing to look at.
A real man wouldnt be bothered by comments like that; someone who already has balls doesnt care that someone he doesnt know tells him to grow some, and sure as HELL won't break into a fight over it, kid...
 Capn_America
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 46
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 7/20/2012 2:35:57 PM
avoiding fights, walking away from a fight is for cowards, wimp's, pussie's

That`s what I usually say, you little gimp. But I`m trying to be nice so I won`t get banned again. Make sure I never walk up on you, cos I`ll shove my boot so far up your azz you`ll be singning the Nike song for a month, you goddamn little sh*t. Stop acting like a troll if you dont want to be taken for one. And if your tough enough to kick anyone`s azz who complain about you, get off the website and into real life, dik.
 rockstar_nj1182
Joined: 12/5/2012
Msg: 47
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/9/2012 10:02:25 AM
From the perspective of a woman, a "man" is basically a guy that fits her expectations of how a guy should act.

From the perspective of a guy, imagine chuck norris riding on a t-rex, throwing sharks at people, and the t-rex is made out of chainsaws... A "man" is the guy that beats the crap out of him.

All the acting responsible, sticking up for yourself, doing what needs to be done... That's just being an adult.
 AusteniticSteelMan
Joined: 12/7/2012
Msg: 48
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/10/2012 6:11:19 PM
Don't lose any sleep over this dude.

This is a traditional view of a male, and you can really just look it up or do a spot of research for your area and what dictates being a man.

What do you hope to accomplish learning this though? You are who you are right now, and trying to change it is just going to cause you more grief in the long term.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 49
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/10/2012 7:27:03 PM

-A real man gives out more than he is given, he gives out acts of kindness, respect etc because a mature man knows what goes around, comes around, and if he can add more good to the world, he's a better person for doing so.


Dude you are a young buck. Don't forget what you wrote. Awesome stuff. If more young people thought like that. The reality is that 20, 25 years from now those principles still apply.
 tie_me_up81
Joined: 3/30/2010
Msg: 50
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/11/2012 5:11:38 PM

Yes - my womanhood is constantly accosted through the media and even on dating sites, not personally, but I don't fit the criteria of being woman that society expects me to be: insanely slender to the point I am near anorexia;


Last time I checked, there are 1000s or not if 100s of 1000s of BBW admiration websites out there. How much admiration is there for big men?....crickets!

Anyway, as for the topic, I think when women go on with the "be a real man, "men up" crap, they are being utterly sexist. Who are they to judge what a man should be?
 yourstillhere
Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 51
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History
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/13/2012 6:03:08 PM
"Man Up, Be a Man, Grow a Pair"


In a nutshell, people say it because they`re afraid of the world and desperately need the reassurance that there are other humans out there whom will be strong enough to take care of them.

The breakdown for you ~

If *any* female says this, she is really saying- " I am weak, I need you to be strong, I need you to put me in my place and take care of me, simultaneously ."

If your bud, chum, lad, pal or brother says this, he`s really saying- "You`re slipping down the man- scale, bro. Get back up to your normal setting, or be forever considered lowered on the totem of manhood and thus, weaker"

If a man who doesnt know you says this, he`s really saying- " I think I`m stronger than you and I challenge you."

If any Canadian male says this, he`s really saying- " I`m a dweeb-fag, and I need you to be strong and take care of me"

The obvious response in any of the aforementioned cases is to apply an immediate and undeniable smackdown to the source of the comment.
 Rheostatic
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 52
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/13/2012 9:23:03 PM

If any Canadian male says this, he`s really saying- " I`m a dweeb-fag, and I need you to be strong and take care of me"


What?
 creativedisco
Joined: 5/18/2006
Msg: 53
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/14/2012 3:59:39 AM
Hm. I write, teach school, play computer games on the weekends, know the identity of several obscure beers, cook, play music, and generally do lots of other "unmanly" things. At least, what some people might consider "unmanly."

Yet, I honestly can't remember the last time someone told me to "man up" or "grow a pair."

Being a "man" is strictly what you make it. If you become preoccupied with other people's definition of what a man is, then you'll never figure out what a man is supposed to be.

Or better yet, stop worrying about being a man. Just be a human being, and make up your own mind about what that looks like. If folks approve then fine. If they don't, then that's fine, too.
 StrangeMedicine
Joined: 7/20/2012
Msg: 54
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History
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/15/2012 9:17:35 PM
It's very personal. unless your born into a culture that has a right of passage, most people can become confused and have to search for there own way to satisfy themselves so they feel comfortable calling themselves a man.

I think "be a man" or "grow a pair" is a more crude way to say don't be timid. Early gender roles had men killing things and ****ing in order to survive, it's difficult do either of which if your a wuss.
 MrGoNGitit
Joined: 10/31/2012
Msg: 55
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/18/2012 4:47:15 PM
It doesn't mean anything except what you make it mean to you. I'm a guy so I've been around, grew up with, and worked around plenty of guys who say that garbage. I say garbage because I've seen some of these same men cry like babies when things got a little tough, mainly on the job. waaah waahhh, I didn't get what he got, I didn't get that; cryin like a baby. These are guys who try to act tough, look at you like, what the **** you lookin at kinda thing. Set your own standard and go with it man, the one who defines you ultimately is you.
 five-marie
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 56
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History
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/19/2012 5:27:54 AM
To me, a real man is a man who takes care of what needs to be taken care of. Pretty simple. Car breaks down, fix it or take it to a mechanic. Repairs in the house, do them. Don't whine/swear/make us beg, just take care of it.
Someone needs a hug/some of your time/attention, take care of it. Be a contributing partner in your relationship.
The reason you don't hear "Woman Up" is because we do it without being asked. Most of us anyways. Most of my experiences have been the woman takes care of the kids/house and works. If the man does any child care or housework he's "helping us", "babysitting" for us.
Respect your partner and his/her time and the rest takes care of itself.
 five-marie
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 57
view profile
History
Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to
Posted: 12/19/2012 1:42:07 PM
I've been with some great guys since my divorce who did man up and take care of things. Like you church they also were great cooks and didn't mind cooking for me. Nice change from when I was married and everything was my responsibility.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Since guys are annoyingly told all the time to