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 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 75
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship? Page 6 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
" I am always a gentleman. Even if I have sex on a first or second date or even a one night stand, I will always be a gentleman the next morning."

Does that include a phone call when you are no longer interested? Or are you just M.I.A.
Just curious :)


Actually, yes. I have never just disappeared on a woman I have been intimate with. Ever. In fact, I still sometimes speak to or get together with (as friends) a couple of them. :) And I have stuck around for relationships with women I have had sex with on a first or second date too. For me personally, the reason I would get imitate quickly with a woman is if there was some amazing attraction and chemistry right away. It happens occasionally.
 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 86
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2012 9:13:17 AM
@BellStone2012

That is by far one the best posts I have read on these forums yet. I couldn't agree more. There seems to be a pervasive habit of generalization and assumption in so many of the topics. Me don't want relationships, women are overly picky and only choose men on looks etc. etc.

People are individuals and while many of us may be seeking similar things none of us are identical. It is all to easy to come up with simple yet incorrect theories in an attempt to explain your own experiences but the reality is that life, the universe and everything are complex systems.

I would suggest that there are many people seeking a happy long term relationship. However, as you suggest, what that consists of and how that looks and how we go about finding it varies from person to person.
 GottaBFriends
Joined: 5/3/2012
Msg: 88
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/11/2012 10:04:22 AM
Perhaps only 20% of the men actually are telling the truth and perhaps the others are interested in a different type of relationship. I would post this elsewhere but my question is why women don't look like their profile pictures, why are they looking for a real man but use make up, hair extensions, girdles, high heels and what have you to change the real them? I have had three dates since joining POF two weeks ago and not one woman was what she described herself to be or looked like the profile picture they posted.
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 89
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/12/2012 10:19:13 AM
Guys ARE looking for a relationship on here, and when they find a woman who they don't feel is relationship material, well, she might be good enough to roll around with in the bedroom until they find one who is. I'm sure women do the same thing.

Mystery solved.
 Sillyandserious
Joined: 11/16/2011
Msg: 91
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/12/2012 5:18:21 PM
There are 2 ways of looking at this....

First...there are those guys who say they are looking for a relationship because that is what women want to hear. Would you have answered their email or met them if they said they were looking for casual encounters? Probably not.

The second reason (the one far more painful to my ego) is that they ARE looking for a relationship and I am just not the one for them.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 92
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/12/2012 9:58:25 PM

I've never seen any evidence that most men don't want relationships. I don't know many men that would turn down a relationship with a smart and attractive woman.


Attractive to whom? You could be a TEN in looks to 99% of the people and still the 1% wouldn't find you attractive.
 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 93
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/12/2012 11:07:42 PM

I don't know many men that would turn down a relationship with a smart and attractive woman.


Absolutely! The minute I find my smart attractive lady I am out of here!
 AwesomeKisser
Joined: 11/1/2010
Msg: 96
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/13/2012 10:27:24 AM
I pretty much ignore the intentions category unless it says intimate encounters or friends. So many people view the process in different ways so how do you label it accurately? Mine says long term because that is what I am ultimately seeking. But it's a process and I want to have some reasonable comfort that if I am putting my energy into an exclusive relationship with someone there is a reasonable chance that they are what I am seeking. You have to meet a number of people and go on a few dates to try to find that right person. Sometimes that can take 2 or 3 dates and sometimes 10 or 12. Depends on the chemistry between two people. You have to spend some time together before you know if you want to be exclusive.

I went on 6 or 7 dates with a lady and she was great in some ways and we had fun together but ultimately we had different expectations so we parted ways. My last exclusive relationship was with someone I knew I wanted to be exclusive with on date 2. We would likely still be together if not for major geographical issues. Putting timelines or specific strategies on finding your partner is foolish in my opinion. It is an organic process. There are no choices for "Long term once I find the right person" or "Dating in order to get to know someone and decide if they are Long Term". Some people elaborate in their profiles and others don't.
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 97
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/13/2012 12:22:05 PM
I would speak for my self here. I would like to have a relationship as I do enjoy being in one. But it dont mean I want it with anyone. Some you meet and on the first date you just say hell no she is out of the question. Then you meet someone else, Everything looks fun great conversation get along togher but not sure yet. So you go on more dates to figure out. Yes sex is a big part of the equation. If I feel that we are on the same page and get along great and lots of fun. Then we keep on going. If after some more dating past the first one. Things come up that you know would not work out. Then you move alone, Sometimes I realy like them but they would say nope it wont work out(Here I were thinking all along that I'm Perfect for everyone). Its not as if most women dont want a relationship its more that they didnt want it with me. Other times it would be me who says no I don't see it going anywhere. If she liked me then I became the evil guy who played games.
We are all looking for what ever we want, What makes us most happy.
 GuitarHero68
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 100
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/14/2012 9:37:50 AM
Men use the promise of a relationship to get sex, whereas women use the promise of sex to get a relationship.
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