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 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 251
Love at first sightPage 11 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)

I would ask my mum how you know when youve met the right person and she would say. You just know. I think you do, I just knew. Simple as that.


The same logic can apply to knowing you met the wrong person right away, if they're unattractive or acting weird or say weird things. I wonder how many divorced people thought they met the right person and just knew, only to have Mr./Miss Right become Mr./Miss Wrong.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 252
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/9/2015 6:57:18 AM

What does Love even mean? I know what it means to me, what i associate it with and what i am thinking or feeling when i say it, but who knows what the other person is actually hearing? There have been times when i've been chatting that i just stop and think "We're using the same words but we're speaking different languages."


Exactly!!!

That's what I meant with being able to 'speak the same language'.....It's a sense of ease and comfort that comes unexpectedly when you meet someone who is a kindred spirit....



I think too much. :)


I've been guilty of the same...I always try and remember that where all think alike, nobody thinks too much....because most folks don't think too much these days....imo



Im going to say yes. The best relationships Ive been in Ive known as soon as I saw them. Ever hear of first impressions? When you go for a job ect. Well there is a lot in that. You might not be aware of it but you can tell a lot about someone just by how they look, how they move, what they wear ect.


But first impressions are often misleading ones.....ime. Also, a lot of that 'information' is really just superficial....



would ask my mum how you know when youve met the right person and she would say. You just know. I think you do, I just knew. Simple as that.


See I have a difficult time with this.....

The reason being that you know NOTHING real about the person at that stage, so, if asked, what would you say that you "fell in love WITH", in that case....?
What traits about the person do you feel are worthy of noting and 'loving' in a total stranger?

For me that speaks more to your own, personal emotional state rather than anything to do with the other person in actuality....
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 253
Love at first sight
Posted: 5/9/2015 8:08:08 AM
"You just know. I think you do, I just knew. Simple as that."

It's funny how in some cases, the hot looking 25 year old woman just knows when she found her dream man-the 70 year old multi-millionaire.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 254
Love at first sight
Posted: 5/9/2015 8:41:12 AM

For me that speaks more to your own, personal emotional state rather than anything to do with the other person in actuality...


aka lust
Some people luck out when it lust turns into genuine love over time

Nothing wrong with lust. Some of the best memories we have is because of it.
 GattoMonstrosis
Joined: 4/4/2013
Msg: 255
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/9/2015 9:12:33 AM

That's what I meant with being able to 'speak the same language'.....It's a sense of ease and comfort that comes unexpectedly when you meet someone who is a kindred spirit....


That's when dates go really really well, when the other person gets who you are, where you are coming from and what you're saying, and you get them, you don't have to keep explaining yourself or look across at a blank expression because they're just not getting it. That's what i meant in another message about amazing connections, when everything goes right and the conversation really flows because you know exactly what the other person means to the point where you're finishing each others thoughts, you feel so in synch it's like you've done a month of dating in an hour.



I've been guilty of the same...I always try and remember that where all think alike, nobody thinks too much....because most folks don't think too much these days....imo


We live in the age of dogmatic googleism, don't bother having an original thought, google wikipedia and repeat it verbatim. :)



The reason being that you know NOTHING real about the person at that stage, so, if asked, what would you say that you "fell in love WITH", in that case....? What traits about the person do you feel are worthy of noting and 'loving' in a total stranger?


I know there have been times when i've looked back on a relationship and it has felt like i knew right from the word go, but that's just because i am looking back at it knowing where it did go and not remembering any bumps or wobbly bits.
 Joegl209
Joined: 10/13/2014
Msg: 256
Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 2:17:43 AM
I do not believe in love in first sight, I believe in lust at first sight. Love requires too many positive and negative things to just fall in love with a beautiful woman just by looking at her. I could find a woman gorgeous then her attitude or behavior could turn me off quicker than a light switch!
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 257
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 5:49:50 AM
Vicki159

I am with you, it is pretty instant or it isn't. It is like you recognise them or they seem familiar. For me I have known within about a minute if I am attracted or the chemistry is there. Not everyone is the same obviously and people do marry without being in love and just sometimes settling and sometimes that arrangement works best because of low expectations and they are friends at least. It takes all kinds. I know what lust is and it is not the same as "in love". It is a component of course. No guarantee any relationship will last but without that chemistry I would not bother to get to know them. But that is me.

 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 258
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 6:12:11 AM

aka lust
Some people luck out when it lust turns into genuine love over time

Nothing wrong with lust. Some of the best memories we have is because of it.


Yup...agreed.....

I just have a problem with such casual use of the word "Love", I guess....

For me it's become one of those overused 'buzz words' that people throw around that eventually becomes meaningless due to misuse....

There's NOTHING wrong with infatuation and lust.....as I mentioned, they are the 'glue' that can hold you together until love has a chance to grow....

But I make NO mistake that 'loving' someone is NOT a 'just add water and mix' kind of deal...not for me, any way....

Love is something that comes with time and knowing the person as the individual they are....

It can be like unwrapping a present every day when you are really into someone....;-)
 Siennarh
Joined: 5/1/2015
Msg: 259
Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 6:15:39 AM

aka lust
Some people luck out when it lust turns into genuine love over time

Confusing concept for me, I know for most there is a clear cut difference for just lust but not so much for me.
Lust/infatuation and love is like inseparable for me but I know most others have a different thing going on there. lol
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 260
Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 9:43:05 AM
sometimes, we think we love the person, but what we really love is how they make us feel. they are like a drug that gives us a rush, and we confuse that with loving them.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 261
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 10:14:59 AM
Oh when I was young I thought everyone I lusted after was the love of my life. After a while you can tell the difference (if you want to, many do prefer lust and denial) between that wonderful feeling of lust, and that wonderful feeling of love.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 262
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Love at first sight
Posted: 5/10/2015 4:04:35 PM

Those couples you see after so many years of marriage, all the ups and downs, still kissing and holding hands?


Old folks hold hands because they are afraid of falling. Once your ankles lose a certain amount of flexibility and reaction times lengthen the world becomes a newly scary place. Doesn't happen to everyone, but when it does you will understand.
 hotrodius
Joined: 6/15/2008
Msg: 263
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Love at first sight
Posted: 3/21/2016 4:33:31 PM
Yes it exists. It can happen to anyone, sometimes it' s one sided sometimes it's mutual. Lets face it most of us here have have desire of finding the one.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 264
Love at first sight
Posted: 3/21/2016 5:25:17 PM
boy, names from the past, posters I forgot about like Cheeky C. wonder where she's raising Cain now?

I'll admit, i'd be leery of someone who was in love with me before they got to know me. what about me could they fall for?
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 265
Love at first sight
Posted: 3/21/2016 6:07:43 PM
westcoast-reble- I think I already commented on this thread but if not, I'll go there............
No, I do NOT believe in love at first sight.
I believe in lust at first sight, instant attraction/chemistry, but true love takes time to develop.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 266
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Love at first sight
Posted: 3/21/2016 6:42:22 PM
I think there is a recognition instantly. I believe in past lives etc and that we can reconnect because of that. Love takes time to grow but there can be immediate connection which is not all physical. It never happens to some people and so they are cynical about it.
Sometimes it develops and lasts and sometimes it doesnt.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 267
Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 5:05:26 AM
Can there be love at first sight while in a relationship with someone else? It seems possible, since there appears to be a lot of people who have left there spouse/SO to be with that other person.

But what are the odds of both people having that "love at first sight" spark when setting eyes on each other for the first time? It happens all of the time in romance movies and fairy tales, but not so much in real life. And how do you convey to someone you don't know or barely know that you have fallen madly in love with them, without feeling like a fool if they don't feel the same way?
 Wilkes_Barre_Candy
Joined: 9/7/2016
Msg: 268
Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 5:56:39 AM
http://elitedaily.com/news/world/research-shows-love-first-sight-exists/1008219/

Research Shows ‘Love At First Sight’ Actually Exists For Some People

Love at first sight is like a fairytale happy ending: Everyone wants it, but only a lucky few experience it. Many (approximately 51 percent of women and 41 percent of men) don't even believe love at first sight is possible; after all, how could a person love another without really knowing that person? Scientists don't know the exact mechanics behind it — love, after all, defies all logic — but they have concluded that it is physically possible to fall in love at first sight. Isn't that romantic?

In a recent survey of 5,000 singles aged 21-70, researchers found that 41 percent of men and 29 percent of females reported having experienced love at first sight. Biological anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher says men are not only more likely to fall in love at first sight than women are, but they're also likely to fall in love faster than females. She says, Men are so visual. They see a woman who appeals to them physically, and it will trigger the romantic love system faster

Women are custodians of the egg, so they are more careful romantically. Falling in love happens in three steps (or stages): romantic love, sexual desire and feelings of deep attachment. When we reach these three stages, the brain releases large amounts of the hormone dopamine, which, according to Dr. Fisher, “governs wanting, craving, obsessions, focus, energy and motivation.” She notes that a brain in love shows similar activity to the brain of a heroin addict — because being in love is much like being addicted to another person.

These stages can be triggered by unexpected stimuli — like the smell of his cologne — thus creating the feeling that you've suddenly “fallen” in love. When you find that feeling, hold on to it, and put everything you have into it — because true love is the best feeling there is.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 269
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Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 10:32:09 AM
^ You're kinda talking about different things, and mixing them up inconsistently and contradictorily.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 270
Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 1:38:02 PM
is it really love at first sight, or is it love with being in love, at first sight? Someone sees someone else with a beautiful smile and a carefree attitude, and thinks that person is going to make their life all better and have value. Then they get to know the other person, who changes over time as we all do, and then they split up saying, "i fell out of love."

a visual man falling in love with what he sees, is falling in love with the outside package. I suspect the large amounts of chemical the brain is releasing, is after the sex is good enough. in love with the feeling of being in love, I agree would look like an addict's brain. what can go wrong, when they are so certain they are in love and life will be better than it was alone?
 razors_edge55
Joined: 11/25/2013
Msg: 271
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Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 1:55:37 PM
GTO it can be more like ,,lust at first sight ,,, I lived more than a year in Paris and you fell in love 6 or 8 times a day ,,,
I think you can feel love at first sight ,,,but love is a seed that grows ,if it gets the chance and only if she feels the same way ,,,,both people nurturing it
 Wilkes_Barre_Candy
Joined: 9/7/2016
Msg: 272
Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 2:37:04 PM
I fought loving my current spouse tooth & nail. I didn't want to get hurt again.

Then on Valentines Day last year, he sent me a FREE E-CARD of Grumpy Cat. It said: "I love you because we both hate the same things." It was too cute, too funny & so on point.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 273
Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 3:18:11 PM

Men are so visual. They see a woman who appeals to them physically, and it will trigger the romantic love system faster


Actually, I think it just triggers the romantic "lust" system faster.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 274
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Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 4:35:07 PM
I wouldn't call it "love at first sight", but there was definitely something goin' on with my eyes, the second I laid eyes on BF when we met face to face for the first time. I walked into an Applebees, I spotted him, he spotted me, he stood, stepped forward and I laid my hands on his shoulders, and kissed him.................on his lips. He didn't hesitate for a second in response.
Don't need to call it anything, but ................"Just right".
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 275
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Love at first sight
Posted: 4/18/2017 5:03:36 PM
ladyinred

wow!!! that was a reconnecting of souls from the past..... in my opinion. I fell in love with a guy that just crossed the dance floor in front of me. Not my type at all, short and as it turned out in a relationship which caused angst and ultimate separation but... never forgotten.

as for men being very visual, women are too but strong attraction is more than that..
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