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 jmark4
Joined: 7/3/2011
Msg: 88
Love at first sightPage 4 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
love at first sight is lust; not love. Love takes time. Most studies show it takes a good year to really know someone completely.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 89
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Love at first sight
Posted: 6/9/2012 11:55:18 AM

We've all heard the cliche, but do you believe?


For the worse..yes, especially for online dating.
There are countless posts lamenting that the ONE and ONLY they fell in love with on line..wasn't it.
People build things up in their minds, especially online, and then they get their hopes/dreams shattered.

Looks as well as..what's inside is important.

I don't honestly believe in "LOVE" at first sight, but attraction.
 happyboricua12
Joined: 6/2/2012
Msg: 90
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/9/2012 12:24:39 PM
I think it is more attraction than love at first sight.
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 91
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Love at first sight
Posted: 6/9/2012 9:56:04 PM
Been there.
Done that.
Kept the t-shirt.
No way was I gonna ever part with it.

Does it make sense to me? No, not really. After all, amongst other things, I'm a scientist, an engineer, trained in the law; and yet, 35 some odd years ago, SHE walked into the same anatomy class in that yellow print sun dress. I would have moved the earth itself to get to know her. And I did. There was nothing about HER I found undesirable, other than her boy friend whom she later married.

We shared a a few beers over the years, I even squired her away from a couple of biochem lectures for donuts (yes, I was a bad boy back then) when the opportunity presented itself.

As I bioengineer I use to know how the body works. Maybe the way she was put together just somehow appealed to that particular part of my limbic system, maybe I caught a whiff of her pheromones and her hla complex is complementary to mine. I don't know.

As others have averred, love does not come from a 10 second glance. Nor was it lust. The closest I have ever come to describing what I felt was desire. Desire to know HER better. Desire to be around HER, even if that meant 2nd or 3rd place. We had some fun together. But love? Not from a 10 second glance; oh no.

TK
[but if it was love, I'd want it to feel like that. ]
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 93
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Love at first sight
Posted: 6/10/2012 3:45:18 PM
reble:

which "love" do you think this was or should be or could have been?

Phileo?
Eros?
Agape?
Storge?

Brotherly? Sexual? Godly? Affectionately?

Yes to all, and yet also no.

As I tell my son, you cannot love that which does not reciprocate. I cannot love things and I cannot "love," in the manner I believe we have been conversing about, someone who knows me not. As I said, the closest I could describe what I felt was desire. Where the desire came from, I also know not. She was not the most beautiful woman I've known, I've known prettier; she was not the smartest, I married smarter; would I have had the same desire if I could not have seen her? Couldn't say in that if that element was absent our introduction would have been vastly different.

Is it possible that at that one inflection in time I was destined to meet HER. And is it possible that as time unwinds what I experienced back then was but a foretaste of something that might happen later on. That would be a hoot. Her dad and stepmom got together that way. Are still together as far as I know.

What I do know I added in a tag line: if that was love, that is what I would want it to feel like.

TK
[perhaps this kind of "love" is just one shadow of what we call fate. the right person, at the right [or wrong] time creates a bond or a memory that can last a lifetime.]
 Viviacious1NY
Joined: 1/1/2012
Msg: 94
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/13/2012 1:00:28 AM
but real love isn't about a specific trait or characteristic in the other person. If you say you love something in particular about the person, then the minute that changes, the love would cease to exist. Real love exists no matter what, so I actually want to hear that someone CAN'T name a specific trait or characteristic they love you for. They love everything about you for no reason in particular, just because...
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 95
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/13/2012 1:12:46 AM

We've all heard the cliche, but do you believe? If so, what do you base it on? Appearance, or is there something more? And if you don't... why?

Happened to me one time. It was much more than just appearance, in fact, that had little to do with it. There was just simply something so incredibly warm/welcoming/kind about him. He is, to this very day, the romantic love of my life. The interesting thing was that in addition to feeling such love so instantly, our relationship worked without "work." Never a fight, argument or harsh word between us. It was not only passionate, it was filled with deep contentment as well. I've never had those two things at one time with any other person. I don't believe this will ever happen again for me in my lifetime, but I'm grateful it happened once. JMO
 trvlngman
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 97
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/14/2012 9:24:22 AM
I belive in it wholeheartedly. My first girlfriend. Bang soon as she and i first made eye contact it was like a bolt of lightning hit me. Granted it only lasted a year and went south. But hey we were young.
 Capn_America
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 98
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/14/2012 9:27:31 AM

Phileo?
Eros?
Agape?
Storge?



Sorry man, I don`t speak portuguese.
Although I love to see things Agape
 Maggie__x
Joined: 5/30/2012
Msg: 99
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/25/2012 9:02:50 PM
I am not too sure, I have a man I have hung out with only twice, he Seems to be in love with me. I mean the usual bf/gf stuff happens bit when I met him through a mutual friend he couldn't even speak to me, he was so nervous. Anytime he had something to say he'd tell my friend and she'd say it ( turn off). The thing is this guy is known to be a player. Well I had to let him down bc he was always going to my friend telling her how amazing I as how I changed him, I literally said one word to this kid. When I let him down it was 3 days after meeting me and he was crying. Then when he got home he was crying to my friend and she's just like do the usual thing you do and hook up with other girls and he just kept going on about how no one could compare to me etc,. At that point he had only seen my face twice. Now it is 8 months later, every now and then he tries to contact me to rekindle anything and it really doesn't work. He has been waiting for me even though I cut it off. I think this is obsession.
 Dropsfromjupitor
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 100
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/25/2012 9:42:59 PM
Love at first is realistically infatuation with another person feels great but I think real love comes afterwards when you unpack eachother emotional baggage :D.
 Johnnyzehner
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 101
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/25/2012 9:50:41 PM
Maybe....subconscious desires meeting the perfect template perhaps. A flooding of oxytocin into the brain.....no, love is this idea that says, "I want to see you thru.". "stand by you when your world is ****ed up."
 PhotoGirl870
Joined: 6/14/2012
Msg: 102
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/28/2012 1:34:58 PM
I can't stand that phrase. How can you love someone by just seeing them for the first time and not knowing anything about them? Oh, that's right, you can't. Love is so much more than the physical aspect of a relationship. I can't love someone I know nothing about, no matter how gorgeous I think they are.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 103
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/28/2012 2:18:08 PM

PhotoGirl870
I can't stand that phrase. How can you love someone by just seeing them for the first time and not knowing anything about them? Oh, that's right, you can't. Love is so much more than the physical aspect of a relationship. I can't love someone I know nothing about, no matter how gorgeous I think they are.


You can hate the phrase all you want. All I can say is you don't know or understand, what you don't know. It may never happen to you and you will never understand, or someday it will happen, and then you'll say this is what they were writing about.
 DallasSBF
Joined: 4/14/2012
Msg: 104
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/28/2012 3:48:01 PM
NO way. WHAT are we jr high students??? NO such animal.... LUST at first sight YES but that burns hot and burn fast and burn up everything around.
 NVMinerMan
Joined: 6/2/2012
Msg: 105
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 1:50:05 AM
only blind people fall in love at first sight

i would to

just hope first thing u see aint a duck
 Capn_America
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 106
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 6:33:34 AM

only blind people fall in love at first sight

i would to

just hope first thing u see aint a duck


According to most relationships in the world, the first thing we see is a big, steaming pile of sh*t that actually looks like sweet chocolate, wether it be male or female
 thepigofyourdreams
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 107
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 7:51:10 AM
Again, I ask all of the "love at first sight" believers...

Have any of you ever been crazy enough to TELL the people you've "fallen in love with at first sight" that you loved them within seconds after meeting?
 Janet_Always
Joined: 6/20/2012
Msg: 110
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 3:46:57 PM
I think I have felt hopeful enough to believe I could love them at first sight... but I realize it takes time to have true loving feelings.

Interestingly, most of those never pan out... but the guy that's just a friend from the beginning becomes more and more attractive to me as I get to know him better.
 Run_it_off
Joined: 1/2/2012
Msg: 111
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 4:59:13 PM
No question about it.......It is the ones like this that are the hardest to resist, because the initial attraction and chemestry was so great. Only happened to me once, but this is enough and I am still dealing with it.....
 wackadoodledoo
Joined: 4/14/2011
Msg: 112
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Love at first sight
Posted: 6/29/2012 5:12:20 PM
I must confess I have never experienced love at first sight. BUT,,,, having read many of the other posts that attest to experiencing love at first sight, I CAN acquiesce and say, yes, it may be possible. What an awesome memory is it really does exist.!!
 crazyheart2012
Joined: 6/27/2012
Msg: 114
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:36:14 PM
I believe there can be instant chemistry but not love.
 NVMinerMan
Joined: 6/2/2012
Msg: 116
Love at first sight
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:38:26 PM
^^^^
so young yet so wise
 Choporis
Joined: 6/25/2012
Msg: 119
Love at first sight
Posted: 7/18/2012 5:32:45 PM
To OP,

I could find strong attraction at first sight; however, love at first sight doesn't exist for me. In order for me to love someone, I would have to spend a long time getting to know that person.
It depends on what your definition of "love" though, my understanding of love with a person is having compatibilities, attractions on both personality and appearance, etc; all of them require time to look into, first sight just wouldn't do the trick.
 SpittyKitty
Joined: 5/2/2011
Msg: 120
Love at first sight
Posted: 7/18/2012 5:39:59 PM
Most women believe in it. Most men don't. (not all, but a higher percentage)
The odds get worse the older you are. Or maybe a better word would be wiser.
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