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 AUTHOR
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 101
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Date sites and self esteem Page 5 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
HawkingJr, what is it that makes things so incredibly tough for you to find dates? Your height (5’4”), or the “mixed race”, or the combination? I wouldn’t think “mixed race” would be that much of a killer, not in this day and age, but I could certainly be wrong. If it’s the height thing, have you considered taking up dancing? Given your athletic background, I would think that you could excel at dancing. When I was younger, I observed many, many times that women would go for a man who could dance, even when he did not fit her criteria in any other way.


Motown_cowgirl
Frankly I don't even know how you could find 1,500 women to write to in the space of 5 years without just taking a shotgun blast approach at anything that moves. Are you sending form letters? I've been here for several years and I can't even find 100 people I'd want to talk to much less go on a date with

You need to move. Where I live, if I search for new users once a week, using 20 miles, and 10 years, as limits, I find 100 to 200 new users every week. That is every week, week in and week out. If you go with the lower number of 100 per week, times 52 weeks in a year, times 5 years, that would be 26,000 new users.

If he hand picked the top 10% of those new users, he would have sent out 2,600 initial messages. And this would only take about 30 or 40 minutes, once a week, to compose reasonable messages, 4 or 5 sentences, mentioning something in her profile. What’s so hard for you to believe?


DragonBits
There are so many miserable people trying to date that even in my worst days I did better than that and felt better than many people here. Now I really appreciate how well I have done.

I have to agree.
 motown_cowgirl
Joined: 12/22/2011
Msg: 102
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 2:19:50 PM
^^^^Well ohenryx, I don't want to move. I like it out here in Podunk; had my fill of places like yours thank you. Houston is a lot different than Tampa, don't you think?? I mean 2+ million is a much different number than 300,000+. Last time I looked, anyway.


What’s so hard for you to believe?

Hard for me to believe there are that many new people to look at every week in Tampa, for starters, much less 100 new women a week. But let's say you're right. Then we'd have to assume your 10% figure represents women who are 100% within the OP's age range, tolerable interests/lifestyle, lack of bad habits red flags social diseases and cyclopian eyes, et cetera. It just ain't happening. Unless you are completely indiscriminate and are just looking for a pulse.

By the way your math is totally off. 10 X 52 X 5 = 2,600, which again is a much different number than 26,000.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 103
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 2:29:12 PM
Dating sites are not billed as esteem builders. If you have better luck in real life, you should stick it out.

You do know that angel fish are extremely carnivorous, right? Vicious little buggers who snack on other angel fish.
 NonamousDog
Joined: 4/20/2011
Msg: 104
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 4:05:38 PM
"Dating sites are not billed as self esteem builders."

True. On the other hand, they are advertised in a way that implies that meeting someone 'just right' will be easier than in Real Life, and the choice of 'millions' of potential partners is also a selling point, though they don't point out that most of those 'millions' are not available in practice to any one user.

So, no, they don't mention self esteem, but they do make some(implied) promises they can't keep.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 105
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 4:55:20 PM

True. On the other hand, they are advertised in a way that implies that meeting someone 'just right' will be easier than in Real Life, and the choice of 'millions' of potential partners is also a selling point, though they don't point out that most of those 'millions' are not available in practice to any one user.

So, no, they don't mention self esteem, but they do make some(implied) promises they can't keep.


As PT Barnum said, "There's one born every minute," and "This way to the egress."
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 106
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History
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 5:07:18 PM
"Frankly I don't even know how you could find 1,500 women to write to in the space of 5 years without just taking a shotgun blast approach at anything that moves. Are you sending form letters? I've been here for several years and I can't even find 100 people I'd want to talk to much less go on a date with."

You really think based on the content of my posts in these forums over the years (nice to tangle with you again! It's been so long...) that I am sending out form letters? But I definitely stopped sending long first contact emails a long time ago -- all that seemed to do was freak women out. Once I got that out of my system, it was pretty easy to send out 40 unique first contact emails a day. I mean, I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but most non-forumite females in their 20s and 30s tend to have 2 to 4 sentence profiles, so it's not like they can expect much to begin with. I do sometimes struggle to come up with something related to their profiles to say, but I do, even if it's just "So I see you live in Odessa. I shot a few scenes from a movie there a couple of years ago blah blah blah." In one of my favorite cases, a woman had put nothing but “????????????????????????” in her profile, to which I responded “!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” And believe it or not, she actually did write back, with a string of “:)”. Never heard from her again after that, but, hey, it’s better for the self-esteem than the nothing I normally get!

As for “shotgun blast,” that depends on what you mean. I definitely don’t email the first 40 women that show up each day, but I also don’t email only the women that sound like they’d be perfect for me. When I come across one of those, I usually take great pains to make sure I explain what I saw in her profile that made really interested, but honestly, any woman that writes a ton in her profile will likely disqualify me and I won’t email her anyway, because the only real way to waste time on here is emailing people that have already outright stated in their profile they want nothing to do with your kind -- some guys think they can change these women's minds, but they're crazy.

(Full disclosure: I actually broke my rule on that last year because one woman pretty much spelled me out in her profile... except she tossed in something about only dating white guys in there somewhere. But it was too perfect otherwise, and she was an outstanding writer, so I figured, what the hell, and sent her an email that started off with an apology about ignoring her disqualification. Shockingly, she wrote me a long email back as if she didn’t even notice I wasn’t white, and we sent 2- 3 page emails back and forth for about a week before I asked if she was interested in meeting and she never wrote again. But that is the only time I can ever recall doing that on POF, because I am highly respectful of women on here who have the decency to not waste my time by putting disqualifiers in their profiles. I did once end up meeting a woman from Match after ignoring her 5'5" height minimum, but there are a lot of complications to that situation I don't have time to get into but it was definitely not a normal "ignoring her preferences" situation.)

There is really absolutely no way for me to tell if a woman would be interested in dating me, which is to some extent true for every guy, but it’s true for me by a factor of X, so if I don’t email every woman I think I would like to date, then I will probably miss an opportunity just because I guessed wrong. Just can’t take that chance.

And in all honesty, I do find a very large percentage of women within my age bracket attractive, much larger than most other guys apparently. What would be a bad thing to do is email women I couldn’t ever see myself dating just because I figured they might be “desperate” enough to date me. That’s just wrong.

As for the numbers, to email 40 women in a day probably takes me about 4 hours, including search time, and there are some days when I just have that kind of time to kill. But I haven’t accomplished it very often. I don’t need too. My best guestimate on how many I’ve emailed over the years is about 3000, which is only 600 a year, 12 a week, 2 a day! It could be as high as 5000 or low as 2000, doesn’t really change the per day number that much. I somehow have about 30 pages of contact history right now (sent, that is), despite the fact that the vast majority of women from 2-5 years ago have shut down their accounts and disappeared – and despite the fact that I sent very few emails from September through February because I was working on a feature film almost continuously in my “free time.” On the other side, I have averaged exactly 1 unsolicited first contact email every 3 months that I have been on the site (not counting those from forumites and moderators).

Casper: I’ve had dozens of different styles of profiles over the years. I have had EXTREMELY creative ones, I’ve used every one of my allotted 7000 characters for some, I’ve had very sparse ones, I’ve even had POF women write one for me that they claimed they would respond to and posted it exactly as they’ve written. Problem is, it doesn’t really matter what you write if no one ever looks at your profile. My main objective with the current one is to not turn anyone off. When you start describing what you want in a date, you are turning people off that don’t qualify – I can’t afford to do that with my 1 to 2 views a week (I understand why many women do it, though some do it far too negatively). And the fact of the matter is, I don’t really have any strong inclination toward any one type of woman, so I’d just be making something up if I put such a thing in my profile. Not that I’m not good at making stuff up, but in this case, that’s just shooting yourself in the foot.

Unfortunately, I am not really in a great position to expand my social life beyond what it currently is. I have to go back into the editing booth next week now that the director is available again. And we’re supposed to shoot something else sometime later this summer, so I have to go into prep for that. Classes are a good way to meet people and so are sports, but I've never met any women that seemed romantically interested in me in any of those activities over the years (I have piled up the friends from them, though).

Ohenry: People often ask where I get that bottom 1% from. You are pretty much spot on: the combination of my height and ethnicities is acceptable to only 1% of all women in online dating. Actually, when I do Reverse Match on Match, it’s closer to 5%, but that’s only because most of that 5% couldn’t be bothered with filling out any preferences (most likely because they are not real women but ads or bots or services, though in some cases it’s obvious they were just too lazy to do so or had just started the profile and hadn't had time to do it -- almost no one genuinely fills out a Match profile and includes my height/ethnicity combination as an acceptable date; doesn't mean I won't email all of that 5% anyway, unless it's obvious they're a scam).

Motown/Ohenry: It’s true that Houston the city is much bigger than Tampa the city, but Houston the metro area is only 15% larger – the Tampa market is a twin (Tampa-St. Pete), Houston really isn't. Houston is the 10th largest US market, Tampa-St. Pete-Clearwater is 14th. If Ohenry and I both stood in the middle of our markets, there probably would be only slightly more people within a 25 mile radius of his than mine. That said, we should probably swap places, because Houston skews much younger than Tampa, so there are far more people in my demographic in the Houston area than in the Tampa area, and vice versa.

Location, location, location.

See my first post in the number of men vs. women thread in this same forum if you want to see how Tampa demographics on POF actually unfold. There are FAR more women for me to email than is actually possible for me to email, even if I refused to email women that are obviously a bad idea to email. Although, that said, I don’t even look at profiles of women who have children... which statistically, is starting to create problems, since the vast majority of women at this age do have children. Soon, it will be possible to run out of “valid” profiles to email.
 onewayoranuther
Joined: 3/21/2011
Msg: 107
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 5:46:49 PM
pigofyourdreams:

"Yeah, I just don't get that. I don't think they realize that some of the smallest details can send out the biggest of messages. You simply need to put your best foot forward in all regards. "

Oh we do ! We fully understand how nit picky you women are trust me .LOL


You think "Pig" is a woman? If I wasn’t so tired after a long days work I could have had some fun with that one.

So you think I am high maintenance...possibly. I own three pieces of jewelry my mother gave me that I never wear. I rarely wear jewelry but if I do, it is usually costume and preferably made from wood. I drive a Chevy and my home is rather small, but fitting for me. I do look different without makeup (cover girl, not expensive), I am more of a tomboy and I wear a ponytail or a hat more often than not. I own about ten pairs of shoes but mostly only wear three. I work out in my garden, paint on canvas, play the guitar (badly) and write songs for my own pleasure. Now I do have this awesome chess board that I bought at auction for $200 so yea, that was major for me...but I love to play chess and this is a beautiful board with a crystal dome that appealed to me greatly, so I treated myself.

Early on in this thread I too looked at your profile. What I first saw was a man with a bow. Archery was always something that fascinated me so I immediately had an interest. Then I saw your picture with no shirt and saw your well developed arms and I knew that archery had done you well. Then I saw where you lived…UGH! I have never had the pleasure of meeting anyone here who was in to archery.

Personally, I am attracted to dark haired men who take care of themselves so yes, I would have gone with you, had you asked of course, to learn about archery and even try my hand at it. It would have been a fun, first date for sure.

But then I began reading….and reading….and reading. I learned more about you from your own words than I ever could have in person.


If you dont get ten messages a day I will eat my own sh*t ! And again many men view gorgeous women as high maintenance and hard to please .



Lastly, I will leave you with this….my mail was few and far between. Sure, the first week I came on I had a few hits but then they became one or two a week. I sent out messages to men I was attracted to and many times I received nothing in return. When I did get something in return the conversation turned sexual and no matter how I tried to sway the conversation towards something else because I am...or was, truly on here to find someone to be with for the rest of my life…not for a moment in time…it was not to be born. I had a few meets that stood me up by not calling and confirming the meet, never to be heard from again. I have had men message me with mean horrible words for no reason. I have met men who were married, false in the way they advertised their appearance and men who were only in my presence to try and have sex with me. So, I quit dating off the internet.

The internet cannot define who I am and does not play a role in my self esteem…it is a shame you have allowed it to affect you that way it has.

P.S. Remember to use TP for your napkin…it will go well with your dinner.
 sledgehammer79
Joined: 3/25/2012
Msg: 108
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 5:52:04 PM
To the OP, 15 messages is nothing! There's times I send out 5-6 new ones in about 45 minutes. I see both sides. Constant rejection can get to you, who the hell likes getting rejected constantly? Although, every single girl I've talked to on here has at least one story of some dude they rejected that wouldn't leave them alone and/or would message really perverted sh*t. If you change your profile to the fact you're 6'5, the heir to your father's Fortune 500 company and you will pick them up on the first date in your private helicopter, I guarantee it will never get rejected again
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 3/19/2012
Msg: 109
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 6:00:29 PM
I laughed at him thinking pig was a woman too. Can't help but wonder who he's written if he's calling a guy who's pretty obvious about being a guy as "yet another of you insanely picky women". At lesat if you're going to massively generalize and stereotype, at least get a person's gender right.. :)

also from pig:


Oh really ? Who are you messaging Donald Trump Prince Charles ? Have viewed your profile and pics your way out of my league . You have high maintenance written all over you .Maybe some of the men you are messaging think the same ?.I dont think I could afford to keep you in make up LOL..Sorry thats my opinion I really don't know .And doubt you would date bellow your tax bracket .




Ok, your problem is becoming more clear with each of your posts. You have made enormous negative assumptions based simply on her pictures. You are shooting yourself in the foot, man. How do you NOT see it?

Wouldn't you be quick to call foul on a woman coming to wild conclusions based solely on your pictures??


ironic, since while pig was typing the above, the OP was typing:


Ah here we go again a another photo critic ? EVERY photo I have used on every dating site gets criticized by someone .Maybe none would be better ? Its either you look this way or you look that ? Your pic looks pretty awe full to there buddy ! I look much better in person anyways have gotten told that allot . And every pic I like ,like my shirtless ones get bashed on .
 kingslayer64
Joined: 5/20/2012
Msg: 110
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 11:27:12 PM
moombeam :

"I laughed at him thinking pig was a woman too. Can't help but wonder who he's written if he's calling a guy who's pretty obvious about being a guy as "yet another of you insanely picky women". At lesat if you're going to massively generalize and stereotype, at least get a person's gender right.. :)

also from pig:"

Funny I dont see gender beside a posters pic bimbo ..I couldn't tell what it was and it posted as to what a woman would say .Suppose I tossed out another red flag huh ? Now kiss my ass !

As far as generalizing every time one of you women posts it supports my generalizations . You're picky ****y mostly fat and use men .

Frankly I am going to delete and get my rejection face to face if I can .But most of you women are to cowardly for that even !
 kingslayer64
Joined: 5/20/2012
Msg: 111
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/7/2012 11:37:45 PM
sledgehammer who I can clearly see is male :

"To the OP, 15 messages is nothing! There's times I send out 5-6 new ones in about 45 minutes. I see both sides. Constant rejection can get to you, who the hell likes getting rejected constantly? Although, every single girl I've talked to on here has at least one story of some dude they rejected that wouldn't leave them alone and/or would message really perverted sh*t. If you change your profile to the fact you're 6'5, the heir to your father's Fortune 500 company and you will pick them up on the first date in your private helicopter, I guarantee it will never get rejected again"

Thanks makes sense ..And as to form e-mails why not ? I get tired of trying to think up crap these women will respond to .
 thepigofyourdreams
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 112
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 12:54:37 AM
hahahaha, another POF bellyacher bites the dust. I love how they always save their ballsiest words for when they know they're going to be deleting their profile.

For the rest of you guys, take a good look at what just happened here, and how this dumb f*ck completely ruined things for himself with just his shitty attitude alone.

It should speak volumes.
 MementoMori32
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 113
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 12:57:44 AM
All I see is another guy who may have been nice at one point, become a bitter, angry, jerk because of women. Nothing new.

Edited to add: Pig, not everyone is so strong. And even strong people can have weak moments. I have a feeling this guy ain't gone for good, but constant negative reinforcement isn't good for anyone. That's why I got out of the game. I do better in the real world so I don't use POF for dating anymore. If I were looking for love on here, I'd be one miserable dude.
 thepigofyourdreams
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 114
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 1:06:26 AM
A woman can't turn you into anything you don't want to become.

It's funny, a lot of men think of themselves as strong, and do their best to project a rugged, tough image, but underneath it, all it takes is bad luck with women to bring him down??

Fascinating.
 moonbeamlover
Joined: 3/19/2012
Msg: 115
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 1:17:26 AM
All I see is another guy who may have been nice at one point, become a bitter, angry, jerk because of women. Nothing new.



wow... so as a woman who DOES respond to emails, treats people with respect, offers to pay for dates, gives every bit as much as I take in interaction with people, pays for my kids, and who truly like people and value them...


being called a bimbo, told to kiss a stranger's ass, a man user, a ****y (not quite sure what that even was), overly picky and most probably fat by a total stranger on the internet is somehow my fault?

for the crime of being born a woman? Because other women supposedly picked on him he has the right to blast away on me?

This is the problem. I could take htis, start treating guys like jerks and say a guy made me this way.

But it would be a choice. Just because the OP was an unmitigated jurkoff does not mean all guys are. And if a guy runs into an entitled woman it does not mean that all women are.

When will people stop having to pay for the crimes of total strangers because of their chromosome at birth? And look for guilt and "proof" of guilt?

I just thought it was funny he was ranting about pig being yet another entitled too picky woman without bothering to even look at the picture. THIS is why guys become bitter angry jerks. They look for things to feed the rage.

Guys hwo punish women because they feel entitled to? are not victims. They are bullies. It's like a person going out and kicking a dog because a coworker gave them a hard time at work.

Take the anger out on the people you're actually mad at. Quit projecting it onto a bunch of people who are strangers, you don't know from adam; who you are reading with intent to find guilt and who probably are NOTHING like you think we are.


vvv

I totally get it, and I would have felt worse for him had he not totally and completely went off on me before he bailed on the site. Being the face target for someone's rage at the entire female gender in all their angst isn't a lot of fun. Especially because I so very much DON'T treat people bad; it isn't fun paying for crimes that I have never even remotely committed.

But I do understand people being frustrated; I just wish instead of feeding the frustration people would switch their focus, quit projecting assumptions and actually have an open mind instead of believing they ahve it all figured out. Because when people assume guilt? They will find it; whether it's there or not...
 MementoMori32
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 116
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 1:32:02 AM
Moonbeam: I agree, people shouldn't take their anger out on others. I feel bad for guys like kingslayer though. He's just let his negative experiences get the better of him. Hopefully he will calm down after giving this site a bit of a break. I usually tell people not to rely on online dating, I know I suck at it lol. Some people just aren't going to be successful here and they take it personally.
 Hybridized
Joined: 4/16/2012
Msg: 117
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 3:31:33 AM

Hybridized: How is any girl supposed to get past all your preferences that you list in the first two paragraphs of the "Who I'm looking for section" of your profile? I think you've managed to alienate every single female that would be interested in you. Anyone that was initially interested when they clicked your profile would, after reading it, be doubting that they fit your criteria. I know you're not listing requirements, but you might as well, because even a hint of incompatibility (at this stage) will make them question if they should or shouldn't message you -- we all know it's easier to do nothing. And, you call us picky. ;)


Why would they doubt fitting my criteria if they actually did? Frankly, if you READ though it, it's more about what range of options I'm OPEN to as opposed to the opposite. The only filters in there are the absolute deal breakers based on things that absolutely have or haven't worked for my relationships in the past, or things I'm absolutely not attracted to. It leaves for a lot of potential women out there to fit. Heck, there's a lot of other things I thought more trite (to me), that I'm quite flexible on that I didn't mention either.




As for having things in common, I know who I am going to appeal to and who I'm not. Needless to say, the ones who like long haired musicians are the ones I get messages from.


See, that's not ALL that I want to be limited to, as that's not ALL that I am (especially since POF isn't exactly a haven for rocker, alt, or goth girls, demographically speaking). But, I TOTALLY agree with you, and since being a musician is only part of my persona (even less now, I just quit my band to move back to Phoenix to peruse my automotive and design related interests more) , I took down all the hair-down, poseurish musico pics for something more pedestrian. It's not dishonest... I'm just not one dimensional.
 mrjon32
Joined: 3/26/2011
Msg: 118
view profile
History
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 3:39:27 AM
That's why I'm on one of those photo rating sites, and I happen to be the #1 guy on it!! Go, me, It's my birthday, whoot, whoot.
 KillmeNowPlease
Joined: 5/25/2012
Msg: 119
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 6:55:05 AM
So I see the OP -aka poor, poor pitiful me has left the building; but not before he took one last swipe at a few, and lodged his final insults - gee why am I not surprised? :laugh: Now, what is scary is he is now out and about in the real world with a bow and arrows-eek! All I can say is thank God, I'm one of them there ****** fatties who he has no real interest in.

Dating online or off line isn't for the faint of heart...one can only hope that this man realizes he is his own worst enemy-and takes the needed steps to heal himself before he tries to have any type of relationship...
 sledgehammer79
Joined: 3/25/2012
Msg: 120
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 8:17:17 AM
Moonbeam that's a good post. I feel bad for the OP in a way, but lashing out at everyone won't make things better. What I don't know is what type of girls was he messaging. Just like in non-internet dating there are girls that are not good relationship material, there are girls on POF that aren't relationship material, despite the fact that it says "seeking a relationship" in their profile. That's why I READ a profile BEFORE sending someone a message!!! Initial messages are tough, I usually keep mine brief, 2-3 sentences and ask them a question about themselves. We also don't know what the OP was saying as his initial message. Really, there's no easy answer. Dating and trying to find someone today are if not impossible, downright frustrating.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 121
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 8:47:52 AM
Pig, I thought his profile was OK, but his problem was he has to eventually talk with women, then the truth comes
out all to quickly.


hahahaha, another POF bellyacher bites the dust. I love how they always save their ballsiest words for when they know they're going to be deleting their profile.


I got a kick out of his calling women cowardly picky ****y mostly fat , then quickly deleting his profile. Does he not get the irony / hypocrisy of that?

I would bet even money he creates another profile using a different name.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 122
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 8:52:49 AM
Mementomori32, I have no sympathy for kingslayer at all. He can't control his emotions, he has no real problems in life, just some frustration.

I reserve my sympathy for people with real problems. Real problems are like the lady in a wheelchair, or a man that finds out he has MS, a family that loses their income because of events out of their control.
 sddude
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 123
view profile
History
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 11:55:18 AM
Women just made him insane, loneliness and rejection = crazy and disapearing hehehehe
That is why my girl is inflatable, she never argues and never says no . hehehehe, I also eat a newborn puppies, I am so normal.
 sledgehammer79
Joined: 3/25/2012
Msg: 124
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 5:23:33 PM
Something that has happened to me twice on here that pisses me off is that I've talked to girl for a week then I ask for her number to text or talk, then, nothing. I never start off by asking for a number, but think about it, in non-internet dating once a guy finds out a girl is single what does he usually do? Ask for her number! If you're not that interested in me then don't talk to me in the first place.

If the OP throws in the towel after 15 messages maybe he shouldn't be on here in the first place. I've learned to never get hung up on one girl, because when you do that's usually the one that won't respond. Message as many as you think you may be compatabile with and are attracted to
 browneyes519
Joined: 2/20/2012
Msg: 125
Date sites and self esteem
Posted: 6/8/2012 7:32:59 PM
As a woman, I just tell myself that I'm only looking for the RIGHT person not whole groups of people. And yes, I think I'd rather be in the position to ask instead of waiting to be asked. I'm a little old fashioned, so I'd rather be asked like a lot of women would. Every once in a while I'll go head and send that message and if I hear back, great, if not, it's not personal, they don't even know me.
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